One of the fruits of marriage is to give birth to children . Doing so does not only show that the couple is fertile, i it also guarantees the sustainability of the family genealogy. It is the reason many couples desirous of children pay fortune to have them. The story of Mrs. Chinyere Onyebuchi Elendu is not any different. It is the story of a woman whose prayer was answered in the 16th year of her marriage, when all hope of conception and childbirth was lost. Sunny Nwankwo spoke with the indigene of Amaeke Alayi, Bende Local Government Area of Abia State at their family house in Aba, the commercial nerve centre of the state.
How did you meet your husband?
I didn’t know my husband. until a friend who was close to the family told me that their son was looking for a woman. I was not the only person that was introduced to the family. However, it pleased the Lord that at the end of everything, I was the one that he decided to settle down with.
When did you get married?
I got married on December, 19, 2006.
How has your marriage wth your husband being?
We have been living in peace since we got married.
Was there any kind of hndrance in terms of conception after your marriage?
After our wedding, we stayed for a year without conception, and it called for concern. From that moment, we started seeking medical help. About two years after our marriage, I conceived a baby boy in 2009 and gave birth in 2010. Sadly, after two months,, the baby died. We thought that since I was able to conceive, the door to conception had opened. But our hope and expectations didiminished as years passed without any positive outcome.
It was not as if we kept quiet; we were doing all that we could do to seek solution and we were taking the drugs that were recommended for us. Why we didn’t go seeking medical help outside Nigeria is because we did dot have the money to ccater for such trips. W;e went to Abuja, Cotonou, Asaba, Lagos and Port Harcourt, among others. I personally was willing to go wherever people suggested that we should go for medical attention, and I thank my husband who was supportive all the way. However, 14 years after the death of our first baby and 16 years after our marriage came these miracle babies.
What was life like for you in those 14 years of waiting?
It was not easy. I went through hell and pain, Because in every visit to the hospital, the man would only undergo one test. B,ut when it comes to the woman, a lot of things are usually involved. Some times, after going through tests I wiould not be able to move my body. I would not be able to sit or lie down. My entire body would be in pains because of what I went through. Sometimes I would be unconscious after going through some rigorous tests. B,ut at the end of the day, God would help me to get better and stronger.
I told myself that as long as this life is concerned, as long as I am still breathing, I must bear children for my husband. I had that determination even when people were saying that I had tried and that I should take a break. But the more you take a break as a woman, the more you are ageing, so you have to do fast while asking for the mercies of God.
My situation made me to be very close God. It made me to realise that it is only God that gives children. I went to several “best” gynecologists on fertility matters, and after spending all that I spent, there was no result. You would go there, spend money and would be disappointed because the purpose for spending such an amount of money was not achieved.
When it appeared that the efforts of men had failed, I started asking God for mercy. I reminded Him that He is the only one that gives children, using related scriptural chapters and verses. In 2024, God showed up for me.
Was there any time you contemplated giving up or quitting your marriage?
There were occasions when the going was very tough, but I never considered leaving my husband or my marriage, because he was not the cause of my problem. However, I would tell him at times that I was getting tired, because I was the one going through the pains. Like I told you, the process of examination in women is always rigorous, stressful and painful.
When other people were sleeping, I would be crying. S;ometimes I cried from night till morning. No one would know what you are passing through. Sometimes, people will tag you as a wicked or unhappy person, not knowing what you are going through..
It is only when people go through the same pain that you are going through that they will understand what you are going through. You would only know how someone feels if you have gone through what that person is going through. So, it was a tough journey for me, and it takes someone who is wearing the same shoes with you to know exactly how you feel. So, it was a tough journey.
What month in 2024 did you notice that things had changed?
It was in April 2024 when I went to the hospital for medical test to check for my menstrual period, because I wasn’t seeing it. Then they said that they would test for pregnancy. That wasn’t what I was expecting at that time. I was a little bit hesitant about it, but they insisted that we should do a pregnancy test.
At that point, I became nervous because it was the last thing on my mind. After they took my blood sample, I couldn’t stay within the vicinity. I had to leave the place in my state of nervousness as my body suddenly became hot. Suddenly, a feverish condition gripped me. About five minutes later, a nurse from the hospital who had gone to look for me but couldn’t see me,called me on the phone and started congratulating me.
She told me that I was pregnant. She said that the pregnancy test showed thick red, meaning that it was not going to be one baby. I couldn’t believe it. I pinched myself and asked if I was in a dream. At a time, I held back my joy, waiting for the time I would go to scan to confirm the pregnancy and to be sure that the babies were breathing and growing. I started asking God for mercy. I started praying that affliction would not happen a second time. It was not that I was not getting pregnant; what happened was that most times, I would lose the pregnancy.
Four weeks into my pregnancy, we went for scan and they noticed that there was heartbeat (apart from the first time that I gave birth to the first one that died, I had never crossed this line before. I couldn’t believe it; it was like a dream. As the pregnancy progressed, we did another scan and they saw that there were babies. From that moment till the day they were brought out, God kept all of us in good health.
How did you break the news of your pregnancy to your husband and loved ones, as some people might choose to keep It secret until they were delivered of their babies?
You know that this is our 18 years of marriage. Our case is well known in the hospital. The hospital knows my husband, so before I could call him to share the good news, they had already called to break the news to him. So, when I called my husband, he was singing to me. When I asked why he was singing, he told me that the hospital had already informed him of the cheering news.
There was so much joy between two of us. We however, decided to keep the news to ourselves until the pregnancy got to the fourth month. Within this period, I was in Port Harcourt, Rivers State, in a friend’s house until the fifth month when I returned to Aba. While we were planning to come back to Aba, we felt that it was good that we should break the news to our families before others got to know about it.
When I came back to Aba, my house turned into Mecca of some sorts as many people who heard the news came either to confirm what they heard or to celebrate with our family. I was answering calls from people that I got tired of answering calls from. My mother-in-law, who was in the US when we broke the news to her, started shedding tears of joy. Before now, we had done nine IVFs (In Vitro Fertilization) and they all failed. I want to commend my in-laws from the Elendu family for their support to us financially within the trying period.
In the eighth month of the pregnancy, the devil came again but God didn’t allow the desires of the enemy to come to fruition. I had what they called placenta previa. I started bleeding, but I laid my hands on my stomach and prayed. As God would have it, the bleeding stopped before we got to the hospital. We got to the hospital at about 9:30am. By that time, both the Director and his assistant havd gone home to rest. We tried their numbers but they were not connecting. As God would have it, we met a doctor on duty, who called for my file. This was happening Saturday after I had gone for scan on Wednesday.
According to the doctor, when the Wednesday scan was brought to him, they discovered that all the children had turned and were struggling for space, leading to the placenta previa. The doctor checked the heartbeat of the babies and confirmed that they were okay. He however said that I would no longer go home. He said that my cesarean section would only be done by a surgeon as the case , if not well handled, would lead to complications. I was in the hospital from that Saturday till the next week Thursday when the doctors that were needed to assist in the operation were available.
So, how did you feel having being delivered of your babies?
The truth is that I was in pain, but my husband was on hand. You know that the babies didn’t stay up to nine months. So, they were moved into the incubator. After delivery, all I wanted was to rest as I was battling with the pains of the surgery. However, after days, a pediatrician came and urged me to start going to the incubator to see them so that, they could come out from the incubator soonest.
According to him, there is a bond that mothers share with their children. He said that,if they heard my voice, they would come out quickly. Two weeks after my regular visit to the incubator, they were brought into my room. Looking at their faces, I was filled with so much joy.
How do you cope with feeding the five babies in these austere times?
There is nobody who does not know how tough the country is now. It has not been easy for me. You have seen five children at a time. People who have just one are not finding it easy, not to talk of someone who has five at a stretch. It is not easy, but with God, all things are possible. Family, friends and well-wishers have been trying their best to rally around us. But it has not been an easy moment for us.
My mother has been here since December. She has been helping out in her little way. I have been getting assistance from my husband’’s younger sister and other concerned loved ones, including some women who were around to help me to feed the babies. My children, though sleep well at night, they are usually fed every four hours. I breastfed them, but it is not usually enough for the five of them. I sit for two and a half hours to breastfeed five of them (30mins each). S,ometimes, one or two of them might stay longer than the 30 minutes the doctor says I should be breastfeeding them. Today, three of them have stopped breastfeeding on their own. So I sleep around 12 am now.
Before the birth of your children, what were you doing?
I was a trader. My husband is a contractor. He drills borehole and does plumbing works. Since their arrival, I have been at home. My customers know that I gave birth and they want me to stay at home to take care of my children.
What would you say to women who are still in your former condition?
Since I gave birth, a lot of people have been coming here to tap from this blessing. Some people who come here would ask me to pray for them. There have been testimonies from people who have come here to tap from the blessing as they have taken in since their coming to the house, including a woman that had stayed for eight years in marriage without the fruit of the womb. God has been using these children to bless a lot of families. Barrenness is not something that someone should wishes even their enemies.
Was there anything special you Ddd to impell the coming of these babies?
They came when God wanted them to come, because there was nothing special that I did. In fact, they came when all hope was lost. I just told God that I was done. If it were before, I would be praying and having sleepless nights. B,ut I just handed over everything to God.
Mrs. Chinyere Elendu can be reached on 07035371131
