Category: Tuesday

  • These gods are man-made

    Think continuously of those who are truly great, men and women who by their deeds fight for fairness and the good of all; think of those who wear on their hearts’ sleeve and domicile in the inner recesses of their souls, irrepressible zeal to make our lives better and worthy of our dreams …there are no such men and women alive, are there? For if there are, Nigeria would be 21st   century version of Eden or Al Jannah; and men and women on whose watch our country so evolves and appreciate would be everything and even gods.

    Our people are quite inane, they wouldn’t know how to create a heaven or sustain the like of it but they create gods by the dozen. I do not speak of divinity that manifests only in far-fetched miracles and dreams; I speak of men and women, boys and girls that we quite desperately and misguidedly deify as our vanities dictate.

    Being rich is the closest you get to being god in Nigeria. Add an impressive root and very intimidating academic record to the mix and you have yourself a 21st century hero or god. Of what calibre are our idols? Who really is the Nigerian god? Who is an example of a quintessential idol? Allison-Maduekwe? Emmanuel Ibe Kachikwu? President Muhammadu Buhari? Former President Goodluck Jonathan? Reuben Abati? Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala? Do their deeds make them worthy of hero-worship or blind deification?

    To what would these individuals owe our reverence of them? Some would say it is their brilliance and extraordinary achievements in their chosen callings. Anyone could be brilliant from time to time but intelligence is what we have to affect all of the time. How intelligent are our ruling class? How intelligent is President Goodluck Jonathan? How intelligent is Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala? How intelligent is Sanusi Lamido Sanusi? How intelligent are they and every other character we continue to endure in the Nigerian ruling class?

    The answer lies as much in their utterances as their deeds. Alas! Transcendent moments and heroic acts are rather deeds of an exalted intelligence, something which Nigeria’s incumbent ruling class pitifully lacks. But despite its protests and dissatisfaction with the status quo, the Nigerian citizenry equally lacks that towering immensity of intellect and strength of character that remains prime requirements in the constitution of a progressive race.

    Our lust for heroes and gods illustrates a fable; it is not of latent strength but disintegration rather it reveals the weakness and shallowness of the Nigerian adult’s awfully preadolescent mind. It reiterates a very shrill cry for help that’s at once selfish, infantile and retrogressive. Put precisely, we are incapable of creating such super humans or elements worthy of being called gods of unconditional love and compassion. All we are capable of are gods of impoverishment and gods of war.

    If we are to be judged by what Greek philosopher, Pythagoras, deems the human measure of all things, shall we fare excellently or not? Things have gone on decadently for too long; that is why idiots as fragile as clay toys have evolved into outsized heroes and gods, on our watch.

    The Nigerian hero is a human sound bite. He is essentially a half-formed mammal, animal to be precise. Take for instance gods and goddesses we have created as our ruling class; they are no longer exclusively Nigerian or humane. Rather they have been turned upside-down and inside-out; they have been scrambled, corrupted and fertilized by ghastly manifestations of self love, tribalism, wantonness, perverted education and sense of worth.

    This abnormality is accentuated by the citizenry’s lack of courage and inclination to dither when the situation calls for decisiveness and fearlessness in determining the course of our affairs. “All gods are homemade, and it is we who pull their strings, and so, give them the power to pull ours,” says Aldous Huxley, English writer.

    Truly; the manner in which the Nigerian electorate worships its ruling class and celebrates its mediocrity makes it impossible for the latter to affect the necessary humaneness, tact and humility that are prime requirements of occupants of exalted public offices. Having made super humans of them, they begin to delude that they are untouchable and unquestionable. They begin to parade themselves as gods and see the electorate on whose strength they ascended to their exalted positions as lesser creatures.

    They seek the exaggerated safety and coziness of fortresses they build around themselves to protect their ill-gotten wealth and ostentatious lifestyles. Suddenly it becomes taboo for them to hobnob with the working class. It becomes abominable for their wives, daughters and cooks to visit the same grocer or shop in the same market as the masses.

    Shamelessly, they clear our public coffers of our collective fund without any inhibition and in response; we celebrate them and grovel at their feet for crumbs of what is rightfully ours. Whenever they intrude our world, they leave behind pungent memories and pains. Whenever they come to town, we must be kept in traffic for them to move freely; whenever they are ‘guests of honour’ at our functions, we are treated with little or no honour. Apology to Kayode Oteniya.

    The chief quality of a true leader is the apparent sincerity in his manners. The speeches he makes are never mere platitudinous enterprise and his developmental programmes are never extraordinary elephant projects; his politics and humanity are not only heard but concretely seen and felt.

    Really there is prime merit in everything about him, and his life generally, radiates truth. His life is what we may call a great sober sincerity. A sort of temperate authenticity that is not only blunt but uncompromising. His fervor is undomesticated, bordering on the wild and forever wrestling naked with the elements that be for the love of the good and the truth of things. In that sense, there is something of the savage yet humane in him like all great men.

    He is one in whom one still finds human substance. He relishes no opportunity to tell any colourful story of himself anywhere; usually, he stands bare and grapples like a giant, face to face, heart to heart, with the naked truth of things.  ‘That, after all,” according to Thomas Carlyle “is the sort of man for one.”

    And such is the type of man we should value above all others. He is the man who as Norman Mailer, an American writer, puts it, would argue with gods and awaken devils to contest his vision. When he dies, his death would be felt nationwide as something more than a historic calamity; women would weep and men would fight back tears as if they had heard of the death of a very dear friend or Saint.

    The creation of such honorable man and god would be our noblest work. But we seem incapable yet of such honorable task. We could start by stripping ourselves of the greater vanities and portentous contradictions. Unhappy the land that has no heroes, says Andrea; No, unhappy the land that needs heroes, responds Galileo in Bertolt Brecht, late German playwright and poet’s “The Life of Galileo.” Regrettably, the meaning is lost on us all.

  • No deal with outlawry

    No deal with outlawry

    Just as well the Niger Delta Avengers (NDA) first spurned dialogue, and resumed bombing critical economic infrastructure.

    That is lesson number one: never strike a deal with outlawry.  If you did, you would lose your essence as a state.

    Despite all the fire and fury, firestorm and thunder, bombing and shelling, the NDA is nothing but outlawry agenda sworn to criminal enterprises; to benefit a few but ruin the majority.

    Ultimately, that majority would not be the Arewa talakawa (poverty after all, has no tribal mark) or the urban “sophisticats” in the South West; or even NDA’s kindred spirits, Nnamdi Kanu’s Indigenous People of Biafra (IPOB).

    Both NDA and IPOB seem acting out a twin but ultra-dangerous conspiracy.

    It would be the Niger Delta poor.  Their lands and swamps have, for decades, been ravaged by an insensitive, oil-guzzling Nigerian state.

    Now, with the so-called Avengers,  the latest mutation of militants, they are being raped by home-grown robber barons, who kill, rob and plunder — but blame outsiders for their crime.

    Now, by NDA’s latest gambit — an ecological equivalent of cutting your nose to spite your face — they are preparing the Niger Delta (whether in or outside Nigeria) for a future of sustained underdevelopment.

    When that period comes, the Niger Delta would wake up with a start — that their most implacable enemies are bivouacked indoors.  Blasted is that community where criminal elements rule the roost!

    Indications that NDA is nothing but grotesque ode to outlawry?  Follow this simple narrative.

    A certain Government Ekpemupolo, aka Tompolo, was to be docked for alleged mega sleaze.  Instead of having his day in court to clear his name, as any lawful person would, he vanished.

    Not even a bench warrant could produce him.  The closest to his “appearance” was some lawyers arguing his case in absentia.  With all due respect, despite the legalistic bluff by his lawyers, that is brash outlawry.

    Shortly after, bombs started booming — the Avengers were in business.  Sure, Tompolo has issued strident dissociations from the Avengers, pleading with NDA  to stop the bombing, but speaking from both sides of the mouth.

    Besides, a man speaking behind a curtain, when he could communicate face-to-face, always lugs a huge credibility problem!

    By its latest sound bites, a so-called Joint Revolutionary Council of the Niger Delta Liberation Force (JNDLF) has been busy shooting from the hips, exultant and quite triumphant.

    But alas! It makes quaint demands for negotiations sans negotiations: halt corruption trials against suspected PDP and Niger Delta looters.  Halt the Goodluck Jonathan probe. Unfreeze Tompolo’s account.  Release Nnamdi Kanu.  Release Sambo Dasuki.

    And if Ripples may add: bring back the corruption gravy!   The Avengers, by their demands, are pressing, at gunpoint, their divine right, and that of their pan-Nigeria confederates, to loot the public till!

    Why is no one surprised?  NDA is nothing but avengers for corruption.  Any country that humours such decadence, tolerating a group that brashly dons the badge of rot, courts  wilful death.

    In that triumph of the moment, JNDLF brags about how USA and “other nations” pleaded with it to shelf its threat of taking down six different targets, via a missile attack.  It also blabbed about how its “international partners”-in-crime (apparently mercenaries) had withdrawn their “chartered” submarines for the Avenger menace, pending the fire next time.

    That could be excitable bluff by a braggart assembly, over-reaching itself.  Before the Nigerian Civil War (1967-1970), Emeka Ojukwu bragged no power in Africa could vanquish Biafra.  His Biafra wannabe, IPOB’s Kanu, also once swore: in Ireland alone, he had enough IPOB scientists to blast Nigeria to its knees.

    Both, however, turned a damp squib — Ojukwu’s bluff, after consuming no less than two million lives; and Kanu, straining to escape trial, with the Avengers’ threat his most pathetically potent fall back!

    But if this threat is real, how did these Niger Delta folks stockpile such awesome arsenal, with the security agencies snoozing?

    That beams the focus on another face of the Jonathan Presidency.

    From the facts in the public space, Jonathan’s presidency was an epitome of rot.  But it would appear that rot was only a stinking outer layer, cloaking a more sinister core.  There appears a direct correlation between the mega loot of the public till and arms stockpile — at least from the Niger Delta front.

    Throw in Tompolo and his alleged racket at the Nigerian Maritime Administration and Safety Agency (NIMASA), for which he has refused to appear in court, his scuttling into a hole and the belching of bombs from virtual nowhere, it takes no especial acuity to put the pieces together.

    The clincher, of course, would be the vandals’ campaign for the release of Dasuki, alleged chief operator of the illicit spigot, that splashed public money into private pockets. But, of course!  Who will flies embrace, as the Yoruba say, but the man with the very bad sore!

    So, the effete Goodluck Jonathan may have run the country aground in just six years.  But his security agents may also have looked elsewhere, while the vandals of the swamps loaded themselves with scary arms.

    That would be gargantuan betrayal — if established: both to his presidential oath and to a country of 170 million people that gave him, a minority of minorities, a rare opportunity.  It also explains the militants’ pre-election boast to cripple Nigeria, should Jonathan lose.

    But by far the most ominous, for Nigeria’s democracy, is that you can lose democratic elections but take up arms to sabotage the winners.  That is the pure treason behind this current madness.

    But no less ominous, for the economy, is the tragic conceit that you could, at gun point, spring those accused of humongous sleaze from justice.

    That is an outlaw agenda —  and that appears the sum total of Avengers’ grand demands. Any self-respecting government would balk at  such inanity.

    “It is the fashion these days to be a desk general” was Wole Soyinka’s witty conclusion to the play, Jero’s Metamorphosis, written in the early 1960s.

    Between the 1960s and now, there seems a metamorphosis, of sorts, from desk generals to swamp generals!  Those swamp generals, whose heroism exclusively issues from bombing oil installations, are entitled to their delusions, like some Don Quixote tilting at windmills.

    Still, there is a difference between stealing in to rupture pipelines, and launching missiles against civilian targets elsewhere.  That would be worse than war crimes.  Fortunately, the International Criminal Court (ICC) has enough gaol rooms for war criminals.  Maybe, it is high time Nigeria contributed its quota to these vilest of criminals!

    Negotiation over the Niger Delta is no crime, though it is strange how little of that went on when “son the soil” Jonathan was president.

    What Jonathan did was not restructure, to correct the age-long problem, but tilt the till for his thieving countrymen, young and old.

    So, the issue is not,  not negotiating per se.  It is not negotiating at gun point, with a group with questionable motives, fired by hideous political conspiracies.

    Any state that cuts a deal with such an outlaw ensemble only nails its own coffin.

  • Bogey of restructuring

    Bogey of restructuring

    With the nation’s back practically to the wall, we are once again, forced to debate the future of the ‘mechanical contraption’ called Nigeria. Like everything Nigeria, it has retained the essential all-comers flavour. In other words, just about everybody claims to know enough of the subject to qualify as an expert. As it is in the social media, so it is, unfortunately, in the mainstream media. Welcome to the talk-fest!

    The subject – you guessed right – is restructuring. A Nigerian Political Science undergraduate would be forgiven for imagining that Nigeria actually holds some proprietary rights to the fangled wordtouted – again and again – as the magical cure to the nation’s ills. Of course, with frustrations ranging from Boko Haram, cattle rustling, kidnapping, militancy and insurgency – all abounding; and with no end in sight to the multifarious challenges that have hobbled the nation’s march to greatness, the concept – like a treasured coin – and with it the myth that it has spawned, has simply endured. The credit for stoking the current fire however belongs to the Turaki Adamawa Atiku Abubakar. Sure, the man knows how to strike the right chords.

    The word restructuring of course means different things to different folks. I sort of like one online dictionary definition: ‘Bringing about a drastic or fundamental internal change that alters the relationships between different components or elements of an organization or system’. Based on the above, few will argue that Nigeria is not overdue for some overhaul of sorts. While for organisations, corporate restructuring is what they do from time to time depending on the exigencies to bring efficiency to their operations, in the hands of our emergency activists and politicians, it can mean just about anything from an alibi to nothing!  Could it also be a substitute for demands  accountable governance?

    Talk of moments when words are lost in frequent usage. I have heard it said that true federalism will do. Sure that’s also restructuring. Or, a break up the country into more manageable administrative units. That too is a variant of restructuring. Today, some folks in the Niger Delta region see restructuring as the key to the Eldorado, that place of eternal bliss where wealth without sweat is guaranteed –even if it turns out an eternal fiefdom of militias and warlords. The same way some in the South-east demand it to redress perceived age-long injustices and with it the unbearable yoke of devalued citizenship that they have been subjected in the Nigerian federation; how about compatriots in the South-west for whom the clamour comes close to a perpetual craving for relevance?

    Lest I forget, some in the Middle Belt – minus the North of course, wants it to stave off perceived northern domination. It seems given that the “North” which sees nothing wrong with the current structure.

    I agree that Nigeria’s problems have deep roots in its current structure. That is a fundamental fact. I could not agree more with the former Vice President on the need “for a restructuring and renewal of our federation to make it less centralised, less suffocating and less dictatorial in the affairs of our country’s constituent units and localities”. To be sure, he says nothing new when he says that the current structure “has not served Nigeria well, and at the risk of reproach, it has not served my part of the country, the North, well”.

    Again, that is beyond dispute. With perhaps the exception of Lagos, the rest of the nation’s administrative units – more appropriately centres of indolence – depend on Abuja for survival. So bad have things become that even the traditionally agrarian ones now wait on Lagos for Thailand Rice!

    More than half a century of independence, we neither have the capacity to generate and distribute sufficient electricity for domestic uses let alone our few surviving industries. As for high-tech industries, whereas countries like Brazil and India that were with us on the same level some 50 years have gone into aircraft manufacturing, the so-called African giant currently aspires to the level of cobbling foreign auto-parts in the name of auto-manufacture!

    The same is true of the infrastructure left by departing colonial authorities; whether it is the railways, the postal services or even the bureaucracy; we have simply run them aground!Today, more Nigerians are out of work than the number with gainful employment. With 10 million out of school kids, a population equal to half that of our next door neighbour, Ghana. With perhaps the exception of few domestic items, the country with the largest concentration of the Black race practically survives on imports from food to basic industrial parts. Our universities, supposedly centres of knowledge production are none of that; instead, they have increasingly become purveyors of ignorance and superstition. I have not yet talked about the paradox of a country which holds the dubious recordsof highest number of millionaires and the poor on the continent.These are no doubt derivatives of the current choking, retrogressive centralisation of political power. This, unfortunately, has spawned the craving for wealth without work, industry or enterprise and its countless variants of rent.

    There is however a more fundamental factor. It is a familiar story of the chick and egg – the question of which one came first. Did the collapse of the moral order – the fine but delicate fabric that holds the society together as an organic and productive entity – create the current monstrosity; or is it a case of the structure producing the monstrosity? Guess this is open to debate.

    One thing seems clear though: No matter how fanciful the proposedadministrative design is, I do not see it curing the current maladies.If it seems hard to imagine capitalism without its undergirding protestant ethos of hard work and frugal living, it is even harder to imagine a functional restructured Nigeria without value and attitudinal reorientation of the individual. Bring all the artefacts of modernity that money can buy;put on top a system of government that is out of this world, without a substructure of good citizenship,  the efforts at nation-building will come to naught.

    Of course, I worry about the collapse of the family and the erosion of the mores – the building blocks of society. Thanks to the new gospel that focuses on prosperity, we now have a generation for whom the sweat of the days’ honest labour is but a curse! And if you think this is limited to the level of the individual, imagine what goes on at the macro level – at the level of institutions charged with delivering services!

    Still want to know why your local electricity wants you to pay for services not rendered? Or the local hire that would loaf around all day and yet expects to be paid to be paid the full day’s wage? The artisan cutting corners? What about the ogas at the topthat spends official hours chatting away? And now, the avengers who care little about destroying their home and hearth for the pleasure of their dreamed Eldorado?

    Talk about thelonging for the‘restructured’entitlement.

  • June 12: Babangida’s turn

    June 12: Babangida’s turn

    Why did military president Ibrahim Babangida annul the June12, 1993 Presidential election, the anniversary of which was marked over the weekend?

    Twenty-three years later, he has not been able to give a coherent answer.  Rather, he has been fudging and dissembling as is his wont.  He has said, among other things, that he annulled the  election as a favour to Abiola, because Abiola would have been overthrown and probably killed if Abiola was allowed to take office.

    Babangida laid out his reasons in his June 23, 1993 broadcast.  But as I will try to show presently, the case falls apart under close scrutiny.

    Those were desperate days in Abuja – days of wild improvisation and frenzied experimentation.  The scheduling of the broadcast shows that much.

    The broadcast would be made at mid-day, according to an official statement.  It did not take place.  It was rescheduled for an hour later.  Still, no broadcast.  The broadcast would now take place at 7 p.m, they said.  The hour came and passed without the broadcast.

    The broadcast took place, finally, two hours later, at 9 pm. It is a sprawling, laboured speech,       some 2,700 words long.

    The first part of the speech was an exercise in self-glorification.  Babangida said that the policies and programmes he had pursued –SAP, for example? — were sound “in understanding, conception, formulation and articulation,” and “comparatively unassailable,” and that history would certainly score the administration high in its governance of Nigeria.

    Twenty three years later, the most widely-held verdict is that Babangida is the prime architect of the nation’s current woes, and that his policies drove Nigeria to the end of ruin.

    So much for the testimonial he issued himself.   The concern here is with the rest of the speech, in which Babangida laid out his reason for annulling the election.

    In implementing its reform programmes, he said, the regime had to contend with social forces that had in the past impeded national growth and development, as well as new social forces that the programmes spawned. To resolve matters, he said, the regime was constrained to tamper with the rules governing the transition.

    Here, one must ask: What happened to the “in-built” corrective mechanism that the regime and its palace intellectuals had forever advertised as a unique feature of the transition design?

    To return to the speech:  Tampering with the rules out of sheer necessity unwittingly attracted “enormous public suspicions” of the regime’s intentions and policies.”  Translation:  The attentive public came to the conclusion that Babangida was nursing a secret agenda, the object being to perpetuate himself in office and in power.

    The transition programme, Babangida continued, was about building a lasting foundation for democracy.  But “lasting democracy,” hear all ye idle chatterers and self-styled human rights activists and your captive press, “lasting democracy is not a temporary show of excitement and manipulation by an over-articulate section of the elite of the whole nation and the political process; lasting democracy is a permanent diet to nurture the soul of the whole nation and the political process.”

    Democracy as “soul food?”   As “stomach infrastructure,” in other words?  Shades of Ayo Fayose.

    The June 12 election, like the presidential primaries that were cancelled the previous year, Babangida said, did not meet the basic requirements of democracy:  free and fair elections, un-coerced expression of voters’ preference, respect for the electorate as final arbiter in elections, decorum and fairness on the part of electoral umpires, and absolute respect for the rule of law.

    But because the administration was determined to keep faith with the deadline of 27th August, 1993 for the return to civil rule, it overlooked the reported breaches. The breaches continued into the June 12, 1993, on an even greater scale, but Humphrey Nwosu’s National Electoral Commission went ahead and cleared the candidates.

    There was also a conflict of interest between the government and both presidential candidates that would have compromised their positions and responsibilities were they to become president.

    The courts had been intimidated and subjected to “the manipulation of the political process by vested interests, to the point that the entire political system was endangered.  Under these circumstances, the National Defence and Security Council decided to annul the election “in the supreme interest of law and order, political stability and peace.”

    Do you hear, all ye skeptics: The election was annulled in the supreme interest of law and order, political stability and peace.

    Resting his case, Babangida declared: “To continue action on the basis of the June 12, 1993 election, and to proclaim and swear in a president who encouraged a campaign of divide and rule among our ethnic groups would have been detrimental to the survival of the Third Republic.”

    Thus spaketh Himself military president Ibrahim Babangida, on June 23, 1993.

    On the top of his form, Argentine soccer maestro Diego Maradona could not have done a better job of faking.

    Despite all the fudging, it is beyond dispute that the NDSC approved holding the election. Babangida admitted that much in the broadcast, perhaps unwittingly. Keep in mind that the NDSC in whose name he claimed to have acted was for all practical purposes a phantom of his own making.

    It was Babangida’s proxy, Arthur Nzeribe and his so-called Association for a Better Nigeria that, to use Babangida’s words, “intimidated and manipulated” the courts.  In that subversive undertaking, they were aided and sheltered by the regime’s Attorney-General and Minster of Justice, Clement Akpamgbo, and his retinue of shysters and cardsharpers.

    The breaches of the electoral laws that vitiated the election, as Babangida claims, furnished an opportunity to disqualify and prosecute the perpetrators and clean up the process.  Why did he put up with them for so long?

    The public was well primed to vote on June 12.  That date had been seared into its consciousness.  It was Babangida’s regime, not NEC, that created a climate of uncertainty around it.  Even so, 14 million Nigerians came out to vote.

    To invoke the “rule of law” to justify the annulment as Babangida did was to stand that concept on its head.  How can a regime that promulgated retroactive laws and routinely ousted the courts of jurisdiction honestly claim adherence to the rule of law?

    Which of the candidates, by the way, encouraged a campaign of divide-and-rule among Nigeria’s ethnic groups, as Babangida claimed?   A candidate for national office employing such tactics would have known that he was committing electoral suicide.  The public would have rejected him emphatically.

    Nothing emblematizes Babangida’s signature duplicity and chicanery better than the claim he now makes at every opportunity that he presided over the freest and fairest election ever held in Nigeria.  How can he reconcile this claim with his sweeping rejection of the June 12 election?

    The legal titan Professor Ben Nwabueze, who served as Secretary for Education in Babangida’s ineffectual Transitional Council and doubled as a strategist in the evisceration of the June 12 election, provides an important clue as to Babangida’s disposition at that critical time.

    “His behavior in the last days of his regime, “Nwabueze wrote in the rather inelegantly titled June 12, 1993 Election:  Problems and Solutions, “left a rather strong impression of a man forced to quit against his will, of one un-reconciled to quitting in the last days of his rule and in the face of defeat, he cut a figure of someone unwilling to reconcile himself with composure to the adverse torrent of events, of an angry and bitterly disappointed man.”

    More tellingly, Nwabueze wrote of Babangida, “His mind, his motions and his actions seemed to have become somewhat disoriented, and no longer governed by disinterested, patriotic considerations. In the event, he quit office in a rather undignified, unceremonious manner.”

    There is nothing more to add.

  • One year of Ambode’s Lagos

    One year of Ambode’s Lagos

    Some 48 hours to the first anniversary of the Akinwunmi Ambode administration in Lagos, I chanced upon an online publication proudly announcing the latest ambition of the Centre of Excellence under its high-achieving helmsman: the induction of the state into the membership of the Rockefeller Foundation-pioneered 100 Resilient Cities. Membership of the network, described as “an elite international group proactively preparing to face any challenge that may lie ahead as the world faces huge deficits in preparedness for rapid growth and natural and man-made disasters”, according to the report, will enable her gain access to tools, funding, technical expertise, and other resources to build resilience the challenges of the 21st century.

    The choice of Lagos, according to the Foundation, – out of more than 325 said to have applied –is based on its willingness, ability, and need to become resilient in the face of familiar challenges of urban planning, transport gridlock, environment, public health and modern infrastructure that have dogged the 21st city.

    At a time when fiscal insolvency of states was the hot button topic in the mainstream media, and with more than two-thirds of the constituent states of the Nigerian federation locked in the battle for survival, it didn’t come as a surprise that the issue barely qualified for mention just as the idea of a state positioning itself for the future at this time would seem to many as an extravagant pastime.

    No matter. An elated Governor Ambode would go on to describe the development as “a significant honour”. The new status, according to him, “will give Lagos the tools to support a better Lagos today, tomorrow, and for future generations to come…”

    Said he: “As a new member of 100 Resilient Cities, we can work with the best in the private, government, and non-profit sectors in developing and sharing tools to plan for and respond to the resilience challenges ahead.”

    However, if the Rockefeller event passed without fanfare, not so the commissioning of the the coordinating agency for emergency responders – the Lagos State Emergency Management Agency (LASEMA) rescue unit at Oshodi by Vice President Yemi Osinbajo on May 23; and not least the highly publicised event of the commissioning of 140 Patrol Vans, 335 Power Bikes and other security kits procured for the Police and other Security Agencies by the Lagos State government at the Tafawa Balewa Square also on the same day.

    Yet, the two separate but nonetheless related developments, in my view, are significant; apart from setting the context for evaluating what the Ambode administration has done in the last one year, it is certainly a telling statement of where the administration seeks to take the state in the coming years. Indeed, only in that context can one truly appreciate the various initiatives seen in the last one year.

    Thanks to the impressive political economy laid by Asiwaju Bola Tinubu (1999-2007), a foundation which was built upon by Babatunde Raji Fashola (2007-2011), a burst of narrative of a city that has come to its own has long emerged. In my undergraduate Urban Sociology class in the early 80s, I recall the Lagos ‘development problem’ being framed in the narrow context of its sprawling slums – the rure-in-the-urbs; its many variants of inner city squalor world of shanties and decrepit structures and the challenge adaptive upgrading, alignment of its rapid growth with the resources required to keep it apace with the needs of the then emerging 21 century city.

    Not anymore. Lagos, the city of the future is on the rise. While it may not be there yet, there can be no denying its readiness to embrace the future as an organic, self-sustaining city.  Like the stone that the builders nearly cast away, Ambode the ‘go-slow man’ is not only working at a breathtaking pace, his dreams for the state are as outsized as they are bold. One year on, his dream of a city that never sleeps under the Light Up Lagos has begun to take shape; the monorail linking Marina to Oniru in Victoria Island and Ikoyi with a connection to the Lekki Rail Line is in the womb; a world class transport interchange – complete with containerized shopping mall, recreation and entertainment facilities at Oshodi to be delivered in the next 13 to 16 months; a N49billion medical park at the former site of the School of Nursing also to be delivered in 20 months. So is the avant garde Fourth Mainland Bridge expected to gulp N844billion to be executed under a Public Private Partnership (PPP) initiative. Need one talk about on-going road projects across the state; the upgrade of slums in Amukoko in Ajeromi/Ifelodun Local Government and Ilaje-Bariga as well as the provision of modern waste disposal facility in Epe? What about the world-class security architecture which offer Lagosians relative peace of the mind?  Twelve months on, there is certainly a lot to be said of the past year under Ambode as the steady coming of Lagos into its own as a dream city, a 24/7mega-city of endless possibilities in which the forces of development are set by the limits of the human imagination.

    Lagos is no doubt rich; by the sheer size of its GDP, it stands out as a clear leader. Home to some 21 million inhabitants, it impressive Gross Domestic Product of $131 billion ranks it ahead of 42 African countries. But that is only a part of the Lagos story; the other part is that it is the seventh fastest growing city in the world, a factor that takes its toll on the available resources; secondly, Lagos, for all its contribution to the federal pie, gets far less than it truly deserves for a state that boasts of being the nation’s commercial capital. That explains why the airport road is in a sorry state; it is the reason the Apapa-Oshodi expressway – which link the seaport to the rest of the country is in a mess.

    Lagos is of course lucky.  It is at least blessed with helmsmen – leaders imbued with the wherewithal to dream and imagine a 21 century city. That is what has made the difference. Asiwaju Tinubu. Fashola. And now Ambode. Sure, the next three years will bear me out!

  • Iyabeji: what a dramatic exit!

    Solomon Grundy, it was, in the old English poem, who was born on Monday and who exited on Sunday, completing his life mission in a week.

    Iyabeji was certainly no Solomon Grundy, for she lived all of 82 years.  But her final day was certainly more dramatic, if less poetic, than Grundy’s.

    That day, June 2, started at 8 am with consciousness without consciousness.  She woke up, all right, but with continuous jerks, which medics later said might have resulted from low blood pressure, medically known as hypotension.

    That started a very bumpy day, through three hospitals, two tertiary, one secondary.  But that day — and her life — ended at around 10:30 pm.  Iyabeji had gone home!

    But who is Iyabeji (Yoruba for mother of twins)?  She was my mother.

    Republican Ripples was conceived as a newspaper column equivalent of the musical Lagbaja, a human essence, with no particularistic identity.  Sure, the column still bears a picture and the writer’s name.  But that is because of journalism convention.

    So, the columnist is just the medium of that essence: seldom any first person narrative, though the newspaper column allows that; and certainly, no personal or personalized stuff.  Everything is focused on the public space, from the prism of a republican, that strikes a bell for equity and equal- opportunity citizenship.

    But this is one occasion I must crave an exception.  The reason is simple: the departed was my pillar.  If anyone hailed this column, the person to thank is Iyabeji.

    She had little education — earning her first school leaving certificate, via adult continuous education, when she was well into her 40s.  To her however, her children’s education, even as a single parent, was non-negotiable.  From her humble purse, she saw her three children through university.

    To us, her children, she was just Iyabeji — my elder sister is Kehinde (a twin, but her Taiwo, a male, died in infancy), I am Idowu (immediate younger sibling to twins) and Sola (whose amutorunwa — culturally pre-ordained name — is Oni, the fifth in the Yoruba line of twins) — just three of us.

    To her immediate folks, however: the Olufojudes, of Ogbogbo, near Ijebu Ode (her father’s line) and the Onadipes, of the neighbouring Erigo, also near Ijebu Ode, in Ogun State (her mother’s family), she was just Ajoke, her oriki (cognomen), to her seniors; and Anti Ajoke, to her juniors.  Anti, the contemporary Yoruba corruption of the English aunty, is closer to sister than the English meaning of aunt.  But her formal name is Oludayo Ajoke Aina.

    The high drama of Iyabeji’s death followed the whistle-stop rush to three hospitals, in a 14-hour blitz.  That was a revealing window on the Nigerian health system.

    It wasn’t the best.  But it also showed glimpses of promise.  It was the proverbial good, bad and the ugly.  But maybe the bottle is half full, rather than half empty?

    At 79, Iyabeji had suffered a threatened stroke, with her mouth line getting a bit disjointed.  She was rushed to the Lagos State University Teaching Hospital, Ikeja (LASUTH), where the stroke was promptly arrested, without any loss of limb.  The facial distortion also returned to normal a few weeks after.  But the hospital told us we would have to manage her condition for the rest of her life.  That meant periodical clinic appointments, which we tried, most times, to keep.

    So, when the June 2 fatal emergency dawned, the first point of call was the LASUTH  Emergency Unit, that same unit that so splendidly arrested her attempted stroke.  Besides, the hospital also had her medical records.

    But alas!  No bed space.  But the medics still rallied to gave her first aid to stop her fits, which had continued all morning, working on her on a wheel chair, and passing some drips into her body.  That would hold her, the medics said, for four hours, enough time to seek relief in the next referral centre: General Hospital, Gbagada.

    So, to Gbagada, we headed; hoping for the best, though time was flying.  But her state was much calmer, her high temperature much lower, though she was still unconscious, even if life, vigorous life, was still trapped in her frail body.

    At Gbagada, however, the can-do spirit and medical promptitude of LASUTH vanished!  For almost one hour, the Gbagada’s Emergency Unit virtually sleep-walked.  The medics would just not be bothered — perhaps they didn’t realize what medical emergency meant?  When they eventually snapped awake, they came to the glorious epiphany that they had no bed space!

    Meanwhile, I was dying with anxiety in the car, while my sister was waiting on their lordships, the All-mighty Gbagada medics!  It was another crucial hour wasted.  Could that have made a difference between life and death?  And pray, could this facility and LASUTH be owned by Lagos State?  Two siblings but two radically different working cultures!

    But could it just be an off day for that hospital?

    Anyway, thoroughly licked, we had to carry our cross to the Lagos University Teaching Hospital (LUTH), Idi  Araba.  But LUTH suffered something I would call operational schizophrenia: between the prompt medics and lax administrative staff.

    When we reached LUTH, it was already normal work close time, with a rather heavy traffic.  But the sight of a lovely, tall, dark, slim and bespectacled female doctor, in green uniform and plastic slippers-like shoes raised our spirit.  Somebody at last was taking charge — and she was very nice too!

    Though after preliminary examination, she confided her condition was “very bad”, there was hope in the calm way she said it.  She stormed the Pharmacy, urging the people there to please quickly cost the admission pack so they could start work.

    That was the general spirit among the medics, during the four odd hours or so Iyabeji spent there, before giving up the ghost around 10:30 pm: prompt, caring, empathetic, dutiful — and hope-inspiring, even when everything looked bleak.  When accosted the following day, after Iyabeji had passed on, to thank her, the female doctor just said she did nothing beyond the duty expected of her — and that with the sweetest smile you ever saw!

    To these patriotic and dutiful Nigerian doctors and nurses, our eternal gratitude.

    But the LUTH challenge came with tallying the bill — which was not much: a mere N9, 700.  It was only the drugs and medical disposables that cost much, over N40, 000 in less than five hours!  But the LUTH support staff were as tardy as the medics were prompt.  That caused a lot of stress, particularly after just losing a loved one and you are making funeral plans.

    Iyabeji, your journey from here was fast but bumpy — very bumpy!  But glory be to God, for I had prayed: if you must pass on, please do so without causing us unnecessary pains.  God answered that prayer.

    Adieu, good mother, model parent.  If I am a quarter the parent to my children, what you were to me and my siblings, I would be doubly fulfilled!

    Good night, mama rere!

  • Muhammad Ali: Simply The Greatest

    Muhammad Ali: Simply The Greatest

    When Ebony magazine dropped Muhammad Ali from its canonical roster of the 100 most influential African Americans some thirty years ago – a roster on which he had figured prominently for 25 unbroken years, I was bewildered.

    The de-listing came nearly two decades after the Thriller in Manila, Ali’s third and final match-up with Joe Frazier, ranked by boxing experts as the greatest bout of all time.  Both fighters came out of the encounter significantly damaged.  Frazier could not get out of his corner for the final round, the 15th; Ali was too exhausted to celebrate.  He would say of the encounter that it was “the closest thing to death.”

    The thrilla itself, as Ali called the Manila clash with poetic lyricism, came a year after the Rumble in the Jungle – another Ali coinage –in which Ali taunted and battled the fearsome George Foreman to an 8th-round knockout in Kinshasa, in former Zaire, now Democratic Republic of Congo.

    That outcome does not tell the full story, however.

    For seven furious rounds, Foreman had thrown at Ali blows that would have felled an ox.  Ali had absorbed them on his arms and body.  The resulting internal injuries took months to heal, and it is a wonder that Ali returned to the ring the following year to face his old nemesis, Smokin’ Joe.

    The de-listing came some five years after Ali had cut a pitiful figure in an ill-advised challenge to his former sparring partner and reigning world champion, Larry Holmes, with Holmes literally pleading with the referee to stop the fight and save Ali from needless punishment.

    It came literally on the heels of Ali’s final ring appearance in 1981, in the Bahamas, against Trevor Berbick, a well-muscled, ponderous pugilist. Ali lost on all three score cards.  His courage showed through and through in that fight; he displayed flashes of brilliance and inspiration.

    But the razor-sharp reflexes were long gone.  Body and mind no longer syncopated.

    It was a poor imitation of the Mohammad Ali who had dominated my generation’s consciousness like no other person.  He had endeared himself to us with his exquisite physique, his matchless boxing skills, his lightning-quick hands, his supreme confidence, his courage, his defiance, his inventiveness, his pride in his black heritage, his eloquence and, yes, his brashness.

    So, his work was done and he now belonged in the past, this man with the most recognizable visage in the world, at once hero and legend? And this, according to Ebony, the quintessential journal of the Black Establishment, not some pesky publication with a reputation for putting back in his or her place any black person who stepped out of the line according to Jim Crow?

    And this was well before Ali’s speech was slurred almost to the point of being barely comprehensible, before his voice became a faint echo, before his body was palsied by the ravages of Parkinson’s disease and the countless hammer-blows to the head he had absorbed in 61 fights.

    The de-listing also came a decade or so before the toll of those fights was on global display at the opening ceremony of the 1996 Olympics, in Atlanta, Georgia.

    For about 30 seconds that seemed like an eternity, the world held its breath as mind and will seemed locked in elemental combat with the once-magnificent but now tremulous body of Ali, poised to ignite the flames of the Games of the XXVI Olympiad.

    It was not a pretty spectacle.

    But Ali’s indomitable mind and will prevailed, and the world breathed a collective sigh of relief.

    I cannot now recall the metrics Ebony employed to determine who was influential in the African American community, nor indeed what in its judgment constituted influence.

    Ali had long ceased to be in the limelight, but could he be written off as a marginal figure from the past, with little or no contemporary influence?

    The world did not think so.  TIME magazine named him Athlete of the (20th) Century.  The BBC voted him the greatest athlete of the century.  President George W. Bush conferred him the Medal of Freedom, America’s highest honour.

    He was a fixture and revered presence at Davos, the Swiss city where the most influential people in the world gather every winter to discuss important global issues.  He rarely spoke, but his presence somehow gave some authenticity to the proceedings; if Ali was there, the debates and discussions must be about real people.

    At the time of his first fight with Joe Frazier, Ali was one of the most polarising figures in America, venerated by African Americans and white liberals on the other hand and execrated by Establishment and conservative whites in equal measure.

    To the delight of the one, he had refused to be drafted to fight in Vietnam, saying he “ain’t got no quarrel with those Vietcongs,” and that no Vietnamese ever called him “nigger.”  To the implacable anger of the other, he was an unpatriotic draft dodger who had dared to embrace a faith they considered dangerous and threatening.

    This latter group was rooting for Frazier and looking to him to put Ali away once and for all.  Ali framed Frazier as an “Uncle Tom,” a symbol of black subservience to white authority, taunted Frazier as a gorilla, and made remarks about Frazier’s looks and skin colour that would have been judged offensively racist if made by a white person.

    If that was marketing hype, it was marketing hype taken too far.  It rankled till the end of Frazier’s life. He would say, apropos of Ali’s titanic struggle to ignite the flames at the Atlanta Olympics, that he wished Ali had fallen into the cauldron.

    Not a few consider rather overdone, mean-spirited even, Ali’s clinical demolition of former heavyweight champion Floyd Patterson and the challenger Ernest Terrell, both of whom continued calling him Cassius Clay long after he had disavowed that name. For every punch Patterson threw, Ali countered with six crisp, lacerating blows. Patterson was carried out of the ring.  Terrell fared just    a little better.

    I have no quarrel with that.  It was payback.

    Ali’s last visit to Nigeria was a disaster, not on account of his waning stature but on account of the cause he had come to pursue.

    He had come as an envoy of the Carter Administration to lobby Nigeria to boycott the 1980 Moscow Olympics, following the 1979 Soviet invasion of Afghanistan.

    The mission was dead on arrival.

    Ali’s handlers should not have allowed him to undertake it.  It was incongruous that the country that had stripped him of his heavyweight title for political reasons and rendered him inactive for three years at his prime should be sending him abroad to campaign for a boycott of the Olympics for political reasons.

    It was unlike Ali not to have perceived the incongruity.  Still, you could never accuse him of selling out.

    It is his great legacy that he brought grace and glamour and elegance to the brutal sport of boxing.  He was a pillar of inspiration to young people all over the world striving to make a mark not just in boxing but in every sport and in public affairs.  He identified with the poor and downtrodden in society.  He was a goodwill ambassador-at-large for many worthy causes. He made boxing a money-spinning industry from which boxers could earn fortunes.

    In the closing years of his life, time and tide and personal circumstance conflated to transform Ali into a secular saint of sorts, revered and almost irreproachable.

    This generation will not see another like him.

  • Three anniversaries in review

    Three anniversaries in review

    This past weekend, three anniversaries conflated to accentuate the perennial debate on what I have often referred to in this space and elsewhere as the Nigerian Condition – Children’s Day, “Democracy Day,” and one year of the Buhari Administration.

    Children’s Day, an international event, is the oldest of the three.   It has been marked in Nigeria for several decades, even if not always in substantive terms.  It is also the least contentious.  No one disputes the place of children in the scheme of things.  Everyone is agreed that the future belongs to them, and that everything must be done to make that future secure and sustainable.

    Whether the foundation for such a future is being laid now is an entirely different issue, what with shabby state of the public educational infrastructure, the plummeting standard of education at virtually every level, the mistreatment of teachers that seems to have become a fundamental principle of state policy, and the bad examples children see wherever they turn.

    There was Senate president Dr Bukola Saraki on national television, regal as always and not           in the least diffident, reading to a group of children to mark the anniversary.  Lost on him was the incongruity of a senior political official, third in the formal national hierarchy, presuming  to serve as a role model for children while on break from criminal prosecution on perjury and relate charges.

    Next time he is shown in court on television, not a few of the children to whom he was reading will wonder why he is one day presuming to set them on the right path and the next day peering at them from the Code of Conduct Tribunal’s dock.

    Only in Nigeria.

    “Democracy Day” was controversial right from its proclamation by former President Olusegun Obasanjo to mark the day he took office, at the end of a rushed transition designed by those elements who survived the attrition and skullduggery of the Babangida/Abacha years to ease themselves into opulent retirement.

    None of those who succeeded them had seen the Constitution from which their power presumably derived, not even Obasanjo himself, who usually takes nothing for granted.  But the military were so desperate to vacate the scene, and the politicians so desperate to take over, that nobody asked any questions, let alone inconvenient ones.

    When the Constitution was finally released, Gani Fawehinmi, of fragrant memory, warned that it was so riddled with ambiguities that it could not be expected to guide Nigeria to a stable, democratic future.

    Gani, our Gani, was right on the mark.

    Sham elections, brazen manipulation of the judiciary, thieving by political officials in and out of uniform on a scale beyond belief, scant regard for basic decencies and for rules of civic engagement, came to define politics, with Abuja showing the way.

    It is a measure of the extent to which their “Democracy Day” has lived up to expectations that the PDP which foisted it on the nation and promised with Napoleonic conceit to hold power for 60 years in the first instance, is on this anniversary in disarray, hugely discredited and justly reviled for its overweening corruption and its staggering lack of vision. Under the PDP, Nigeria became a full-blown kleptocracy with hardly any redeeming grace.

    This, then, is their “Democracy Day,” a monument to pillage and squandered opportunity.

    It remains to add that their “Democracy Day” was erected on the epic struggle of Nigerians  and their sacrifice in toil and tears and blood to establish a government based on the pan-Nigerian mandate won in the June12, 1993 presidential election won by the Muslim-Muslim ticket of Bashorun Moshood Abiola and Babagana Kingibe, a sacrifice that the May Twenty Niners  have never summoned the honesty and the decency to acknowledge.

    In the hearts and minds of millions of Nigerians, June 12 has a much stronger claim to being Nigeria’ s Democracy Day, and will continue to be celebrated as such with greater eloquence and  conviction than May 29.

    May 29  also happens to mark President Muhammadu Buhari’s first year in office.  The appraisals have ranged from witheringly dismissive to mildly approving, with Ayo Fayose’s belonging in a special case of the congenitally lunatic.

    “What are the consequences of the French Revolution?” Henry Kissinger once asked the Chinese statesman Zhou Enlai?  “Too early to tell, Zhou told the former U.S. Secretary of State a distinguished historian.  And Zhou was not being facetious.

    In that context, one year is too short a period for any categorical assessment of Buhari’s tenure.   It provides an opportunity to review the choices he has made.  It furnishes some indication of the direction, the path the administration is likely to follow.  What seems the most informed appraisal of the moment may in the womb of time turn out to be dead wrong.

    Still, it has to be said that Buhari did not hit the ground running, pardon the cliché, as the APC had led the public to believe he would, and as the scale of the mess left behind by Jonathan and his team on every facet of national life demanded.

    He took an inordinately long time putting together his Cabinet.  When he finally did, the result felt far short of public expectations, given the challenges of the moment.

    He and Vice President Yemi Osinbajo set an inspiring example by making public their portfolio of assets; since taking office, they have together cut a profile that is a sharp departure from the   excess and the vulgarity of the Jonathan years.  But much more than that was required to assure the public that Change, a new way of conducting government business, was on the threshold.

    It would have struck a resounding blow for Change, as I had urged in this space, if the President were to declare that he would assume responsibility for domestic expenses for himself and his family and the cost of entertaining his personal guests, leaving the Nigerian taxpayer to pay only for official dinners and such outings hosted by the State House.

    Office cleaners take care of their families on the national minimum-wage salary of N18,000 they are paid several months late, if at all.  Why shouldn’t the President do the same?  What is the justification for this tradition whereby a president becomes for all practical purposes a ward of the state, with all his needs and fancies paid for from the public purse?

    Ending this pernicious state of affairs would signal Change that the public can embrace even when being asked to show understanding; it would have a ripple effect that will help cut the cost of governance and generate funds that can be invested more productively.

    Buhari should certainly be reminded of his campaign promises.  But how much can you do with an empty treasury and dwindling revenues in a global economy in recession?  Given some of the brutal realities the administration now has to contend with, the unpleasant truth is that a good many of those promises cannot be fulfilled in their original  form anytime soon.  But he must move quickly to implement faithfully those that are still feasible.

    In the end, however, even the most churlish critic will have to grant that Buhari has broken Boko Haram’s backbone; that he has put corruption on notice that it will no longer go unchallenged, despite the best efforts of pettifoggers shielding behind a strategic ritual they call the “rule of law,” and that he has arrested the drift, the serial impunity and the decadence of the Jonathan years.

    This last is almost achievement enough.

    Those who dispute it should contemplate where the nation would be today if Dr Jonathan and the Obtainers United had succeeded in suborning election officials to alter the returns of the 2015 poll so that they can remain in control, Potemkin “transformation” and all.

  • Opposition by ambuscade

    Opposition by ambuscade

    The people have a right to a compassionate government.

    But does the government too, have a right to an empathetic people, particularly when things are tough?

    This thoughtful newspaper cartoon, which, by the way, Ripples stumbled on, on Facebook; so is unable to make a fuller credit, inspired these twin-questions.

    By it, President Goodluck Jonathan handed President Muhammadu Buhari a Nigeria as once-upon-a-car; not even fit for a decent junkyard.

    One year after, Buhari is hard at work, fixing that car.  Sure, it is nothing close to zooming around.  But given the original junk that it was, you would admit a lot of work had been done.

    That more or less captures the reality on ground, this last one year.

    Yet ambush, from a seeming unfeeling people, about captures opposition tactics against the Buhari Presidency, in its first year.

    But it is instructive that the chief partisan driver of this ambuscade, the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP), just crashed, like a miserable, whining dog — with all fours up!

    From one ‘M’, two others have stormed the bastille,  in a fierce turf wrestle, to corral a crashing castle: Modu, Mantu, Makarfi!  It is the fearsome fire of M raised to power three!

    One party, three helmsmen!  Marvelous  in the eyes of those PDP’s impunity has beggared for too long, isn’t it?

    But that tactic is hardly illegitimate — politicians, after all, would play politics.

    Still, ambush as opposition has been most potent from seeming non-partisan players, who ought to be natural partners of a reform-minded government, in times of dire moral abyss.

    Take Catholic Bishop, Matthew Hassan Kukah, who had built a reputation, over the years, as some conscience of the nation.

    When the issue became unearthing Jonathan-era sleaze, however, the priest’s pious advice: forget the graft and move on!  Jonathan had, after all, lost at the polls and promptly given way!  Should he have stayed on, Your Lordship?

    Another Catholic high priest, Anthony Cardinal Olubunmi Okogie, former Archbishop of Lagos and people’s hero during military rule, thundered in holy rage — not against those who had stolen the commonwealth blind, but against those who were sweating to bring them to heel!

    What had changed: was corruption bad under military rule, but tolerable under democracy?  Perhaps because a Christian brother headed the regime under fire?

    That moral ambush, for whatever motivation, gave the ancien regime the false hope they could pull off their diversionary tactics.  A much raped people were the worse for it.

    Then came another ambush: from media corruption champions.  Sure, this ensemble would insist they never endorsed corruption — and they wouldn’t be wrong, per se.

    Still, while the criminal elements went on an over-drive to arrogantly subvert the courts to escape justice, this lobby went on an overdrive to push a most grotesque crusade for “human rights”.

    The long and short of that campaign: the state should self-castrate, under a weird “due process”, while these rogues rigged and raped the judiciary to escape with their loot!

    Yet, this same lobby shrieked loudest, almost to the point of manic celebration, that the Buhari government, to echo their preferred cliché, could boast “no single conviction.”

    This loud orchestra would also boom loudest, claiming the government has not delivered on its promises, mostly on the economy — which, in truth, given the level of pains in the land, it has not.

    But pray: how do you secure convictions when putative felons subvert the judicial process; or rev up the economy when rogues had cleaned out the public till, of otherwise investible funds?

    It is this blanket criticism, with scant institutional memory, a wilful disregard of the shambles the Jonathan government left behind — even after a year — that passes Nigerians as unfeeling; and not able to appreciate the epochal chaos that Buhari and his government are battling with; from which they hope to rebuild the commonwealth.

    This moral-neuter zone, where the clergy and the media heavily descend on those trying to fix things but gift the execrable crooks fresh life, would appear the most unflattering portraiture of the Nigerian, during the first year of the Buhari Presidency.

    However, many a Nigerian, appreciative and empathetic, appear miles ahead of these rarefied institutions, which alas ought to be the true mirror of society.

    That, perhaps would be the ultimate redemption, when the worst is over, and history of this putative iron-to-gold era is written.

    That is a distinct possibility, if the Buhari government remakes this economy as a productive hub; and purges public service of its ruinous greed.

    Meanwhile, back to the present, old decadence would embolden a Bukola Saraki and his APC rebels to play Judas with PDP ambushers, to push the PDP agenda of past ruin, as some new pseudo-salvation.

    That decadence would push an Olisa Metuh to preen and strut in court, as if being docked for alleged sleaze deserved some gold medal.  Even after being cut to size, his family would wilfully dub a duly constituted court process as “persecution”, not prosecution.  Well, the joke is on them!

    This last year, Buhari has not exactly come out flying.  But it is doubtful if anyone in his circumstance would.

    Ambode’s Lagos?  Sure.  But that is because, since 1999, Lagos has become more and more settled.  Compare that to Jonathan’s central rubble, and the difference is clear.  Even then, Ambode suffered some opening months of utter demonization!

    President Buhari has his job cut out for him; for in this second year, he would rise or fall.

    But to get the best, Nigerians must learn to understand and appreciate little gains.  Such guided praise motivates a conscientious government to feel treasured, challenge itself, and do more.

  • ‘How far, Chairman?’

    ‘How far, Chairman?’

    At the end of a visit some 15 years ago for a conference in Abuja that was going to stretch into a two-week stay in Nigeria, I learned from U.S. Embassy officials, horror of horrors, that under  the immigration laws, I would have to spend two years in Nigeria before I could obtain a Visa to return to my base.

    My appeal dragged on for some three months, until President Olusegun Obasanjo caused the Ministry of Foreign Affairs to issue, as demanded by the U.S. Embassy,  a Diplomatic Note stating that the Federal Government had no objection to my being granted a re-entry visa.

    While the impasse lasted, the question I dreaded most was:  “How far?”

    It always stumped me.  It made no difference whether the person asking the question knew my circumstance or not.  In fact, I suspected that the questioner did know my circumstance, and was being graciously solicitous; otherwise, he or she would simply have swept by with a perfunctory greeting.

    And so, I felt an obligation to answer courteously.  But how to answer?

    You could not answer yes, or no, or perhaps, or okay, or fine, or not bad. You could not give an answer that was as laconic as the question itself.   You could not always be sure that the inquiry related to your discomfited circumstance.  Yet, you could not permit yourself the pat retort:  “How far what?”

    That would be rude and ungracious to someone who probably meant well, though you could not tell.

    And so, I found myself having to explain to almost everyone who asked “How far?” the nuances of the Visa categories used by the US Immigration, especially the treacherous J-1 Visa; the usage of the Diplomatic Note or Note Verbale as they call it in diplolingo, slang for “diplomatic language,” and how an Embassy official who had demanded it thinking I could never secure it had become positively hostile after it had been couriered to his office, etc, etc.

    At every rendering, it was an exhausting narrative.  I was not always sure how it registered with the other party, or whether it even served any useful purpose.  But I could not come up with any short answer that could do justice to the question in its beguiling simplicity and apparent innocence.

    I tried “We are at it,” the time-tested response that farm and building-site laborers devised to fend off inquiries from dyspeptic employers or supervisors about the progress of work.  No luck. The other party simply repeated the question, as if he had not heard my answer.

    When asked “How far” on another occasion, I offered a variation on the labourers’ standard response aforementioned.  “It is coming up,” I said, with confidence.

    “So is Christmas,” my interlocutor shot back.

    Christmas was scarcely three weeks behind us, and its sounds and smells still perfused the air.  It was as if my interlocutor was determined to cure me of any illusion I might be harbouring that my ordeal would end soon.

    I began to contrive ways of evading anyone I suspected might put the question. But that only confirmed their suspicions that I was in a situation from which only a miracle could rescue me.

    What had seemed to me then an inquiry into my beleaguered circumstances, well-meaning or otherwise, has now turned into a salutation for all occasions, a substitute for “Hello” or “Hi there” or Bawo ni or yaya de or kedu.  You hear it all the time, from pals, from chance acquaintances, and from total strangers.

    A good many persons I have observed do not seem fazed in the least when asked “How far?”  Some see it as a jocular locution and respond just as jocularly:  Afa dey for mosque.   Others respond with the usual phrases of casual conversation.  It all ends there, in banter, and the parties move on.

    But surely, there must be those battling all kinds of anxieties who wonder whether the question, which could cover a whole range of issues from the deeply personal to the commonplace, and from the profound to the prosaic, is pure-minded; whether it is not at bottom intrusive, and  impertinent to boot?

    If you are preparing for the West African School Certificate examination and are perfecting plans to, shall we say, guarantee a relaxed supervisory environment, is  “How far?” not an insidious attempt to get you to implicate yourself?

    Perhaps you are seeking a place in the university and are entirely at the mercy of the JAMB.  Is the status of that quest what the “How far?” is about – whether you again failed to make the cut for the fifth year running, or whether they are dispatching you to the new Federal University of Bama which you did not know existed?  Is it about your secret plan to avoid being sent on National Service to Chibok country, on the edge of Sambisa Forest?

    It could be any or all or none of the above, which makes the inquiry all the more subversive.           For in all these instances, you could hardly answer the question without somehow compromising yourself.  Yet, ignoring the question might be seen as evasiveness stemming from a bad conscience.

    Another scenario:  You are about closing in on a contract to supply toothpicks to the National Assembly for the next ten years, or have concluded a deal with manufacturers for a shipment of run-of-the-mill motor vehicle spare parts from Taiwan or fake drugs from India, and some busybody in a chance encounter asks you “How far?”

    Can anyone blame you for construing the question as an invitation to divulge a trade secret – a ploy that any entrepreneur worthy of the title can sniff from ten miles?

    Okay, it is none of the above, only an affair of the heart.  You finally summoned the will to        tell the gorgeous girl next door or the sedate, winsome woman at your workplace or in the neighbourhood of your admiration and adoration and that the rest of your life would be meaningless without her.

    Just when things have entered a delicate phase, some bloke who may well have his own designs on the same gorgeous girl or winsome woman saunters up to you in the office canteen or at the pepper soup joint around the corner and asks, as if on cue: “Chairman, how far?”

    Even the usually imperturbable old-school type may at such a moment be driven to wonder aloud why some people just cannot mind their own business.