Having reported activities of the Nigerian entertainment industry for a decade, I have partially been involved in its art, to the degree that it gives me an insider’s perspective, as a reporter. Serving on the board of some movie award schemes and participating in talks that are meant to shape the industry have not only increased my camaraderie with stakeholders, they have helped in the relative depth with which I now understand, analyze, interpret, opinionate and foretell circumstances.
However, one aspect of the pack which is considered the hatchet man’s job is the review of movies from a critic’s point of view. Years back, a film marketer came to my office, crying over a review we did, believing we were being unfair, to say the least. He is a Yoruba man, and so when he spoke to me in my language, almost in tears, his emotion betrayed that perception that dubbed us as sadists, and as some would say, enemies of progress. He lamented over how much the movie cost him, and if he would ever recoup his investment judging by our negative review.
I have visited movie sets and seen all the pieces that were eventually cut and put together to make the final release of the home video. And I bet that, how perfect a film will turn out, depends largely on how beautiful each piece is, in a way that they won’t turn ‘the coat of many colours’ to a rag.
My review of ‘Half of a Yellow Sun’ has never been positive. It is more painful when you consider how much was sunk into that project which, with all the touted UK-film propaganda, is yet to get a distributor since its premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival, last month. And I tell you, a lot has to do with the foundation and orientation of the director, no matter how much money is at the disposal of the executive producers. No film director can give what he does not have.
Therefore, my quarrel has never been with low budget films, but with the creative lapse that is brought to bear on some productions. And I am just going to excuse the cast and crew members of a movie and possibly ‘hang’ the film director in my final analysis. After all, it is the director’s story, told in motion picture.
My friend, a former journalist and film marketer had invited me to his movie set. I had all the time, because it was my leave period. Some of the top actors on location thought I had come to spy on them; they are usually wary of a journalists lurking around movie locations, where they (cast and crew) talk and play freely among themselves after each scene wrap.
It was a low-budget film and for some reasons, the lead actor could not make it to location. After some downcast moment, my friend turned to me, asking if I think I could face the camera. He was apparently frustrated that he didn’t think it twice that a rookie would be just more than a risk on his project. He couldn’t afford to lose time and days as the hotel bills and other expenses were being incurred. I told him I couldn’t. Then he got slightly angry and showed it through sarcasm: “But you know how to criticise, ehn? For once, you should have come in front of camera light and see what actors go through… you should try it and see if you will not frail out..”
I collected the script and was looking at it, during which he and his director had some time to chat. I could tell they were considering their chance with me. So when my friend drew nearer again, he said in a persuasive voice; “guy, I know you can do this. Think of what it means to act alongside this actress (yeah, the lead female is a big cross-over thespian). This could be your chance you know…” he went on and on. At that point, I already told myself that I could handle it, recollecting my days in secondary school, playing the police lover-boy roles like you would find in some Indian movies. All I did was to call my wife and prepare her mind. As always, my wife said to me that she believe I am capable of handling anything. She agreed that I should give it a shot, oblivious of the session of kisses that the role required.
It was a shoot across the weekend, and the stress of repeated takes increased my boredom. Soon, this ‘play thing’ became tedious and I began to imagine how much the artistes were being paid and if I could endure doing a job like that. Of course, it was a typical Yoruba film production and only the lead actress received about 200 percent above what other actors were paid. I bet you, she is the highest paid in that industry. But you could tell that in all, the actors enjoy doing what they have chosen as a carrier.
But me, did I get paid for this unsolicited job? The answer is no! But to further safe the face of my friend, I won’t tell you how much was promised me as ‘fuel money’ and whether he has finished paying it till date…. Permit me to sound him out on this last line, and see if he wouldn’t be mad at me. This movie resumes shortly… if only you understand my language; watch out for part 2!
