Married on November 28, 2007, Mr. and Mrs. Joshua Chukwuemeka Iruke lived happily. The only worry was that six years after the wedding they were without a child. The birth of their baby girl has ended the pain, prompting celebration with friends and well-wishers at Saint Thomas Anglican Church Avonipupe, Ubakala, Umuahia South Local Government Area, Abia State. In this interview with SUNNY NWANKWO, the couple relived their experience. Excerpts:
Mrs. Iruke, what was your experience being childless after many years of marriage?
As a woman, it wasn’t funny. Every blessed day, you kept on asking God whether you were really a woman. At times, one would cry, at times, you would go into prayers. At times you visited prayer houses seeking where God would answer you. It wasn’t easy, but thank God that at last, He has not only put a smile on my face, but has restored my joy as a woman.
Sometimes, you would hear people asking if she is sure she is a woman. Why doesn’t the husband remarry? What is she even doing there? She should be abandoned. At times you’d greet people outside and they would pretend not to hear you It was a bitter experience.
How were you able to handle the pressure from in-laws and other relatives?
When my father and mother in-law were alive, their attitude was that God determines all things and that one day, God will do it. Where I got pressure was on the part of my sisters-in-law. But now they are all giving thanks to almighty God. It was not easy then. Thank God that everything has come and gone and today, we are all happy.
Did you at any time doubt yourself?
At a time people suggested I should visit doctors and hear from them. I took a step like that and was told to come with my husband. We went and after several tests and scans, the result was positive. The doctors said that was no problem.
Did you consider quitting your marriage as a result of the pressure you mentioned?
I thought of that, but I never did it. I didn’t do it because I depended on God. I recall that while I was trying to marry, there were three suitors that came. I asked them to wait because I had to pray before marrying. At the end, God told me that the man I am marrying was my husband. So, in everything, I always reminded God that He gave me the man I married.
Did you seek alternative solutions?
No, God forbid! I didn’t try that. It was just a particular prayer house (Assemblies of God Church) that I normally visited.
How supportive was your husband when the baby wasn’t forthcoming?
He had no problems. He is a man to marry any time, any day. There was never a problem.
But I want to thank my mother and parents in-law for their supports. They are all dead, but I will forever remain grateful for what God used them to do in my life. They were wonderful and tried on their own part as mothers and father.
Some of the things I learnt from them is being patient and content with what I have and to share things with those around me.
Why did you choose the names you named her?
In fact, when I put to bed and saw that it was a baby girl, I said, really this is a gift from God because all those years, nobody has ever said, okay, take this let me compensate or console you with this but the ultimate God did it and that took after the names; Onyinyechi and Treasure Chukwuemeka because she is treasure from God that I can’t even buy with money.
Do you have any advice for other childless couples?
God is always the ultimate. Let them believe in God and remain prayerful because sometimes, some of these things can just be challenges of life which, if you show God that you know Him, God at a time could say, “I was only trying to pull your legs.”
They should go to hospital and back it up with prayers. They should also imbibe the spirit of almsgiving.
Mr. Iruke, what was your experience in those trying years?
Well, in the first place, I am Christian and you know that the Bible teaches every believer to be patient and that aspect of teaching is what by nature that I imbibed so much. I decided to remain with her because on the altar, on the day of our wedding, I promised to live with her for better or for worst.
Where you under pressure at this time?
So much, the pressure was at a time becoming overwhelming but I was patient, as my parents, precisely, my father, taught me. I imbibed and inculcated it and then also considering the fact that there are some other people out there who had similar experiences and God answered their prayers. So, that encouraged me.
How were you able to manage this pressure?
I knew it wasn’t necessary to look for an alternative. I had made up my mind because I knew that things had not gone to the worst. I believed God and that with Him, all things are possible and I knew that nobody should count my wife out from conceiving a baby because she wasn’t that old.
Did you consider remarrying?
I didn’t because I know women’s reproductive system and I can tell you that my wife is not infertile. We consulted experts in the field and the results we got were all positive and with that, one wasn’t that perturbed.
Did you seek spiritual help?
There was an academic colleague at school who at a time heard that we were still waiting for the fruit of the womb; he gave me his own experience that was spiritual, but I didn’t do anything about that. He asked that I consult him so that we begin a process of praying and fasting to torpedo the devices of the wicked.
How did you feel when the bundle of joy finally came?
Excited, of course, giving glory to God. The business is between me and God. I have been showing God gratitude by His very grace. I feel elated, happy, giving testimonies to people when they ask me and always returning glory to God for His mercies.
