DEAR Aunty Temilolu, I read your article – Reasons Your Teenage Girls Are Obsessed With Boyfriends! I must let you know it’s 100% accurate. In these days of Instagram, Facebook Snapchat etc., more of our youth, especially girls and young ladies seek so much attention. And they end up receiving attention from suspicious sources. We see girls as young as 13 striking up relationships with men more than twice their age because they are looking for attention. Others are intimidated by their friends who have 10,000 followers on Instagram and flaunt their material possessions: iPhones, wigs, expensive makeup, trending wears etc. Consequently, they get entangled in ungodly and even evil relationships with men and boys. Luckily for me, I’ve learnt contentment. My course-mates make jest of me because I can go almost a year without doing my hair. I can also wear the same clothes twice in two weeks. However, it doesn’t bother me because I know it’s temporary. I have plans for my life. Most people I know – boys and girls alike – can’t see beyond iPhones, Instagram, becoming a “slay queen/big boy” etc. I know I’ll go far in life and become very great by God’s grace. You are a role-model and a virtuous woman. May God bless you real good for your great works in the lives of young ones.
Oluwafolakemi Alasade, 18
Dear Parents of my darling, precious, glorious, dignified, world-famous and heavenly celebrated Nigerian sisters,
Last Sunday, I began discussing reasons your girls are desperate to have boyfriends the first being Inadequate Love and Attention. As I wrote, if children are not given enough love and attention in their impressionable years, they seek it in the wrong places and these are days when we have more predators than genuine care-givers. Girls especially, want to feel the warmth and love of their parents whether they have all the money in the world or not. They go to school, church and other places where they mix. They hear others talk about the precious moments they spend with their parents, they see how other parents visit their school even when there’s no need to, they see how they grin from ear to ear when they see their kids. They see how their birthdays are celebrated and how some parents would never miss the school’s open days. They see how a good number of girls jump into their father’s arms when they pick them up from school or on one of their visits. Believe me, not only children are affected by these but young adults as well. I remember while in the university, my wonderful and fantastic late dad – (then in his late 60s) paid one of those surprise visits – he loved to do that hoping to catch one in a wrong act (smiles). As usual, he didn’t spend more than 20 minutes but came along with goodies for me and a friend more like a sister whom I shared a flat with.
After I saw him off, I returned to my room and found my friend sitting on my bed, head bowed and looking sad! She then told me she doubted I knew I had the best gift God could give anyone. When I asked what, she told me in plain terms that over the years she noticed my siblings and I were our father’s “heart-beat”, that was the term she used and the first time I’d hear such used for such an expression of great love. She then went on to say her father would rather sit in his business place than spare her a thought! This has stuck in my heart since she said it 20 years ago! I know for a fact that my late dad’s attitude, unusual expression of love, what I considered excessive strictness and intentional parenting had nothing to do with his background – in fact very far from it because he was a self-made man. So, nothing stops you from deciding right away to be all over your children. The world out there is crazy-YOU KNOW! And if you don’t fawn all over them now and get into their heads while driving God into their souls, you end up disappointing yourself and denying them the beautiful life they’re entitled to. You simply drive them to the devil who’s a bloody reaper. He could reap a beautiful destiny with just three words – “I love you!” Or “you’re the most beautiful girl in the world,” or “Wow, I’ve never met anyone as intelligent as you,” etc. What in the world stops you from saying these to your girls every day? I love girls with all my heart! I hate to see them go through any pain or get derailed because they eventually determine the next generation. May the God of Jeshurun carry them in His everlasting arms, give them direction and set them free from the wiles of the devil in Jesus mighty name!
- To be continued.
