Tag: broken

  • Broken hits cinemas Christmas

    Lovers of gospel movies will be thrilled this festive period during the theatrical release of Broken.

    Written by Mrs. Bola Akande, daughter of late ace film maker Ishola Ogunmola, popularly known as I Show Pepper, the movie will show at KS Cinema Total Garden Ibadan, G2G Cinema Ile-Ife and Clementine Cinema in Osapa, Lekki, Lagos on December 24-26th by 12pm, 3pm and 6pm.

    The train moves to Mauve 21 Ring Road, Ibadan; Adolak Hotel, Ore, Ondo; Continental Suites Ibara, Abeokuta; Ace Supermarket Owode, Oyo G2G Cinema in Ile-Ife & Silverbird Cinema, Abuja on December 26.

    Broken, according to the United Kingdom-based Akande, is the story of how a 12-year-old girl is constantly molested by a family member.

    Because incest is an abomination in her society, she keeps her pain quiet, all at the same time desperately striving to gain the love of her runaway father.

    But on her 17th birthday, Morenike decides to fight back with grave consequences.

    According to Akande, a Masters degree holder in film-making from the Manchester School of Arts: “Incest is a taboo in African culture, a topic that is hardly talked about, making it look as though it doesn’t happen.

    “Yet a large number of people are victims. Broken The Movie explores this topic from the point of view of a victim.”

     

  • Broken toys without batteries

    As you read, youths with key-pad confidence are pounding away on their mobile phones, iPads and computers; they are mouthing off and tormenting virtual space with insolent gibberish, over centrist candidate, Emmanuel Macron’s victory at France’s presidential election. Macron is just 39 years of age and predictably, Nigerian youth are screaming: “If he can, yes we can!”

    Again, Nigerian youths are mired in delusions of grandeur. They overestimate their worth. Whether rich or poor, educated or illiterate, the Nigerian youth becomes the emptiness that approximates silence, for lack of will and unimpeachable values. The impoverished youth flaunts the personality of a paper cup and rich spoilt brats behave true to type, they personify the pop that empty drums make amid burning dump – no doubt, an Ivy League education without ethics makes a trust fund ‘baby’ an expensive toy without batteries. Substandard education makes the middling youth even worse; it moulds him into a broken toy without appeal. Take a look at contemporary youth of rich and poor divides.  They are disposable and yet enjoy patronage by the ones Wole Soyinka eloquently described as the wasted generation.

    The Nigerian youth possesses the personality of a paper cup. This is because like paper cups, they are used to being used and disposed by the predatory ruling class. Yet whatever callousness they are forced to endure, the ruling class should not be blamed They shall not be blamed, for we made ourselves unbidden offering on the altar of vultures

    The Nigerian youth becomes his own karma.

    It is the malady of this age that the youth are too busy preaching that they have no time left to learn. In Nigeria, we are too busy dumbing down that we barely have time left to grow. It is a sad manifestation of stunted growth that we evolve into foetal adults and spend the rest of our lives seeking the debilitating comfort of what Ayn Rand aptly sums up as “life boats.”

    It is even more disheartening to see us adopt as a favourite past time, the pillorying of our elders and the rapacious ruling class. Many a Nigerian youth love to prophesy the worst about our fatherland thus it is never surprising to hear the average Nigerian youth pronounce with emphatic pessimism and relish that “This country is doomed,” and “Nigeria is finished.”

    The Igbo youth laments his persistent marginalization from the scheme of thing/bounties. He believes Nigeria is skewed to work against him and fellow Igbo because his peers from other ethnic groups are wary of his touted acumen, industry, courage and political savvy.

    The Hausa youth believes he has inalienable right to statutorily and heavenly accorded rights to reign supreme and lord it over his peers irrespective of merit considerations. And the Yoruba youth, goaded by sentiments of his perceived higher wisdom, towering depth in diplomacy, culture and politics believes that he is entitled to the best the country has to offer, on a platter of gold.

    Every youth desperately perpetuates his sense of victimhood and entitlement. The idea is to keep whining until he gets lucky and appropriate an immense portion of the proverbial national cake – with minimal exertion and at no cost.

    We used to be regarded as the promising youth, the gifted generation that would rescue Nigeria from the brink of irredeemable ruin. But that spell of hopefulness has dissipated now. Our “wasted” elders have seen through the swollen belly of our pride. They know we are increasingly handicapped by greed and lack of creed. By creed, I mean a coherent and specific set of goals, a consistent series of norms according to which society is to be remade.

    Since we have learnt to blame the ruling class for everything, what is it that we want from the ruling class? We don’t need their permission to make something of the world where they have failed but we still live our lives seeking their permission to evolve positively and maturely.

    It takes courage and enormous reserve of decency to evolve a humane ideology and establish it. We haven’t the courage and will, and this interferes with our ability to accomplish progressive change. More worrisome are our violent attempt to be radical; eventually they resonate too feebly, like a kind of rudderless activism.

    We identify all that is wrong with our society but we are never specific about what must be done to correct them. It is relatively easy to join a picket line and tirelessly castigate our elders and ruling class for everything that is wrong with our lives but these actions, while they demonstrate frustration, in some instances even heroism, deal generally with symptoms of· our problems and not the solutions. All the picket lines in the world will not resolve ills of fraudulent and impatient youth, perverted values, greed, racism, disillusionment with study and substandard education.

    A broad wave of disillusionment and darkness persists above the silver linings we desperately wish to succeed our darksome clouds. Yet with precision and unfaltering devotion, we work ourselves up into such a state that we can only see the volcanic flare of our destructive acts as glitters of grandeur.

    We have perfected the art of standing on barrel-heads to spout and be seen, while we engage in pursuit and acquisition of mostly unearned wealth and greatness. Eventually, we luxuriate and spread out like a green forest with sour fruits and severed roots.

    Apparently, we suffer a throwback to the 70s – the era that launched a trend in which Nigerians became preoccupied with themselves more than the survival of the nation. Self preservation has become an inexorable obsession of many youths seeking to escape the slow, steady path with its craters of mishap and socio-economic vagaries.

    What Joshua Lubin identifies as the “Me” decade has indeed, recoiled inward rather than concern itself with crucial national issues, like national progress and ethical rebirth. Therefore, popular culture attracts dubious labels such as “narcissistic” and “decadent” from critics and the “wasted” older generation.

    The Nigerian youth has become so self-involved that almost every action and train of thought perpetuated by him serves as an instrumental resource to situate this generation in historical context, as perfect illustration of the much-hackneyed and over-exploited “Lost Generation.”

    Our inordinate quest for self-fulfillment further establishes us as the worst that could possibly happen to a heavily endowed nation like Nigeria.

    But we aren’t actually so bad. If we could look inwards to summon latent will and channel it towards the rejuvenation of outdated mores of morality and simple decencies, our lot may change, for better.

    The Nigerian youth betrays self. Poverty and job insecurity are cited as reasons for the betrayal; true, the society betrays the youth by the hour but it’s about time we stopped repaying perfidy with perfidy. It’s about time we evolved dependable and practicable means of creating and instituting a leadership and culture of citizenship we could trust.

    Only then can we evolve as heroes of truth and our dream world. How?

  • Building broken bridges

    •The Apapa-Ijora Bridge must be fixed without delay

    One of the more tragic paradoxes of Nigeria’s development challenge is the critical state of the country’s critical infrastructure. The Apapa-Ijora Bridge in Lagos is a pre-eminent example of the clear and present danger posed to the nation by its inexplicable failure to maintain the transportation, communications and power systems that are vital to the continued functioning of a modern state.

    The condition of the bridge is a grim testimony to decades of the malign neglect that characterises the national attitude to the maintenance of infrastructure. Much of the bridge’s asphalt overlays have been eroded by the elements, as are the concrete joints linking it to Wharf Road and the ramp linking it to Lagos Island and Iddo.

    Many of the pillars supporting the bridge have structural defects, caused by successive fires which have exposed the steel rods within them. To make matters worse, the bridge routinely bears the weight of hundreds of petrol tankers waiting to load supplies from the depots in Apapa.

    It goes without saying that the traffic situation on the bridge is horrendous. Motorists are compelled to either undertake a torturous negotiation of huge pot-holes and protruding steel rods on the bridge itself, or divert to service lanes and drive against traffic in their attempts to bypass the bridge.

    It is difficult to underestimate the implications of this tragic situation. The Apapa-Ijora Bridge is the spinal cord connecting Nigeria’s commercial nerve centres of Lagos Island, Iddo and the Apapa Central Business District (CBD), incorporating financial institutions, wholesalers, shipping firms and oil-marketing companies. It is the main entryway to the country’s two largest ports, the Lagos Port and Tin Can Island Port Complexes.

    Given the concentration of businesses in the area it serves, the poor condition of the bridge as well as that of the adjoining Oshodi-Apapa Expressway has resulted in the loss of thousands of man-hours on a daily basis. Accidents are common; an articulated truck fell off the bridge in July. The heavy traffic jams often facilitate criminal activities, especially the robbing of commuters at gunpoint. The environmental pollution resulting from the emissions of thousands of vehicles and the implications for the health of commuters and residents can only be imagined.

    If nothing is done to carry out the urgent renovation that the Apapa-Ijora Bridge so desperately requires, it will eventually collapse. The consequent loss of life and damage to property would be a major disaster unparalleled in the annals of Nigerian history, not to mention the logistical implications for the many businesses located in the areas served by the bridge.

    Immediate measures must be taken to repair the bridge. In 2012, the federal and Lagos State governments set up a technical committee to look at ways of regenerating the Apapa axis. It came up with 12 recommendations, including detailed plans for the rehabilitation of the major roads and bridges in the area. Even though the committee’s report was submitted to the National Economic Council in June 2012, nothing was done. The Federal Government must work with the Ambode administration to implement this plan, which represents the most comprehensive approach to resolving the Apapa crisis. Fixing the Apapa-Ijora Bridge alone will not solve the problem; an integrated approach incorporating rehabilitating roads, relocating tankers, reducing vehicular traffic, landscaping, sanitisation and demarcation is essential.

    Lagos State has had to struggle with the problem of dilapidated bridges over the past few years. Between July 2012 and February 2015, the Third Mainland Bridge, the Eko Bridge and the Marine Beach Bridge have all undergone extensive rehabilitation. In most cases, action was taken only when the state of disrepair became far too obvious to ignore. This cannot continue. The regular maintenance of infrastructure should become the norm rather than the exception.

  • How to stitch a broken heart (2)

    IN continuation with last week article, we will be looking at more tips on how to get over the sudden break-up of a long time relationship; some of our saddest moments are when we experience broken relationships. Whether it is between siblings, husband and wife, friends, broken relationships can mean broken heart. In addition to certain points that were mentioned last week, here are the tips to help you get beyond the pain and move on.

    Stop the blaming game. Her putting an end to the relationship is not your fault; it is her decision. According to your story, although we are not fortunate to hear her own version, you love her selflessly and you did everything within your reach to make her happy because you saw her as your wife, so try not to be too hard on yourself; accept that the relationship was not meant to be.

    I know it can be very difficult sometimes, but the truth of the matter is that you must move on, thinking may be if you have done things otherwise is not going to change anything because she has moved on, all the calls or text messages she is sending to you is not to get back with you, but for you to see her as a friend not an enemy.

    Next step is defining your real intention. There are two important questions you must ask yourself. Are you trying to move past the break-up, or are you hoping to get back with your ex? You must know what you want in order to move on.   Another way to move on is to avoid every form of communication with your ex, no matter how tempted you are. If possible, try not to take her calls, or delete her messages.

    Don’t make her a topic for discussion among friends, especially when you are with friends who are friends with her as well. Don’t embarrass yourself or put yourself in situation where you will look back and feel humiliated. Come out with your head high. Broken heart is not the end of love in your life. You will love again with the right person at the right time.

    Avoid going into another relationship right away so that you can be sure of what you want, instead of using the person to fill in the gap or emptiness you feel as a result of the break-up.  This is one of the greatest challenges people who are brokenhearted encounter. It will be nice to give yourself time to heal properly from the pain.

    However, make the best out of the situation by occupying your mind. Get busy doing what you wish to achieve in order to improve yourself, instead of sitting thinking about how it was and how it should have been. Learn from the break-up and be a better person. Take the whole thing as a wake-up call and get moving.

    Let the attachment or connection go, like the saying goes “never allow someone to be your priority, while allowing yourself to be their option”. Care for you because the person hurting here is you, not your girlfriend. Conserve your energy for those who deserve it, beginning with yourself. Get support; take away the worries of how you are going to face your family members and friends who know the closeness of your relationship with her.

    This is when you need the help of your true friends and family members.  So talk to them, be specific about where you want them to come in. For example, may be you will like to be in their company socialising.  Or consider visiting a counsellor if you feel the situation is beyond you. Get help immediately if you are feeling depressed.

    Do not misinterpret the end of a relationship as meaning you are somehow not enough. At times, people do not have the ability to offer others the type of affection and care they need or deserve. It is their issue not yours. You should be perfectly lovable just the way you are. Know that this phase will pass away some day.

    Finally, you must allow forgiveness; when you are hurt by someone, you love and trust. You might become angry, sad, or confused. If you dwell on the painful event or situation, grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility can take root. If you allow negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice.

    Forgiveness brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life. Learn to trust again; there is no question that break-ups can be painful and it might be tough to trust and love again, this might sound impossible.  Whenever you get involved in a relationship, you know there is a risk. Don’t let a bad experience keep you from living your life to the fullest. You can go through life loving and laughing.

    Harriet Ogbobine is a counsellor and a motivational speaker. Send your questions and suggestions to her on bineharriet@gmail.com or txt message only 08054682598. You can also follow her on twitter: @bineharrietj

  • How people helped me get over my broken marriage, by Princess

    How people helped me get over my broken marriage, by Princess

    Damilola Adekoya, aka Princess is a popular Nigerian comedienne. Surprisingly, she also suffers pains, despite being in a profession that demands that she make people laugh. The thespian turned comedienne recently admitted to being traumatised by the breakup of her seven month old marriage contracted on May 8, 2013. As she admits, “Three years ago when I had a broken marriage, I was psychologically down, but it was the same thing that brought me down that became my strength; that is one of the psychological powers of comedy- it heals. People around also helped me in recovering from the most challenging period of my life.”

    Inside sources at the time revealed that the union was fraught with misunderstandings and disagreements, which often demanded the intervention of friends and relatives. Princess herself debunked the notion of a happy union at the breakup when she said, “We have been having issues since the wedding, but we still remained together hoping that we would be able to work it out. But apparently, we couldn’t work it out, hence the reason for our separation.”

    Although quite a number of reasons were rumoured to have caused the split between the celebrity and her not-so popular ex, hopefully, she is in a better place emotionally, although she has not been romantically linked to anyone in recent times.

  • Broken youths

    THE trip from Mosalasi to Iyana-Isolo bus-stop in Mushin, Lagos State is not a long one.  If the road is free, it can be covered in about five minutes.  But there is usually traffic, especially at Idi-Oro, Olosa and Iyana LUTH.  Even with that, on the average, the trip can extend by 15 or 20 minutes.

    On Monday, the traffic was unusual, occasioned by a trailer which fell into a ditch.  The vehicle I boarded took a detour into Martins Street to use short cuts that would take us close to the last bus stop.  As we meandered through winding back streets I was lost in thought about life in the area.   We passed dusty roads with patches of asphalts here and there – reminders that they had once been tarred – crowded houses, some spacious ones, and people going about the general activities of everyday living.  Given its accessibility, I thought life there would not have been so bad but for the volatility of the area.  Clashes among rival street gangs are common in Mushin.

    We soon ran into traffic.  I was not surprised that it was caused by touts, young men, extorting money from motorists for diverting from the highway to ‘worsen’ the state of their roads.  When our vehicle was to pass, the driver decided to use bravado to avoid paying the N50 toll.  I understood his plight.  There were only three of us, and the fare was N50 each.  Giving the touts N50 meant parting with a third of his income.  No one would be happy to give his hard earned money to self-appointed taxmen who would likely squander the money on booze, women and drugs.

    But his audacity did not work.  One of them stood brazenly in from the vehicle.  The other, and by far the rougher fellow, came to the driver’s side and threatened to deal with him.  Holding up a bleeding finger, he said, “One of your kinds did this to me.”   As he made further threats, he waved the finger about, allowing his blood to splatter on the driver, the dash board, windscreen, floor and seats of the vehicle.   “I will deal with you if you are not careful,” he added menacingly in Yoruba.

    We passengers could not stomach it anymore.  “Was it him that injured you,” I asked.  “Why are you threatening him?” another woman queried.  We could as well not have spoken.  The fellow did not as much as humour us with an eye contact.  After he walked away, his colleague collected the money, regardless of what we thought of them.

    All this while, a boy on a bicycle had paused, watching the encounter.  He was close enough for me to tell him not to follow in the footsteps of the touts but struggle for a bright future for himself.  He listened and nodded attentively.  I hoped he would not grow up to be like them.  Given the large number of unemployed youths in the area, I was not sure he had many role models.

    I thought of the touts too.  What must have led them to that way of life?  What kind of childhood did they have?  One of the other passengers remarked that they likely belong to large families that did not care about their upbringing.

    The incident reminded me of where I was coming from.  It was a seminar for student teachers of the University of Lagos who are training to care for very young children.  They were told to take their roles seriously as they would be laying the foundation on which the young lives would be built.  The convener, Mrs Funso Chikezie, made a vital point about starting early to entrench the right values, morals and attitudes into young children so they grow up to be responsible adults.  This responsibility starts from the home, then the school.  The environment also has its influences.  But strong efforts by the home and the school to guide young people aright can help them withstand the pressures from their surroundings.

    We failed our youths of today by not providing them with the right foundation from the start.  Limited opportunities, corruption and financial hardship make the situation worse.  Returning them to the straight and narrow is no easy task.  It is a long term process that will require resources, campaigns and a lot of determination.  We must be ready to do this for them if we hope to enjoy our senior years.  As for the young ones joining us every day, we must not fail them.

  • Our hearts are broken

    Our hearts are broken

    The last four months of the year or the ‘ember months as we call them in Nigeria are perceived here as wicked and blood thirsty, especially December. Not only do we usually witness an upsurge in the number of road traffic accidents and the attendant fatalities recorded, some other evil things like kidnapping, armed robbery, burglary and carjacking also take place during this period thus driving fear into Nigerians at the approach of December.

    Such evil acts as kidnapping are now so lucrative that the evil men and women behind them no longer wait for December before striking. In the past it used to be that people mysteriously disappear around December/Christmas time and most ended up in the hands of ritualists working for their principals who wanted quick money which they could flaunt and squander during Christmas  and New Year festivities to show their community that “they’ve arrived” as we like to say here.

    If that was kidnapping for money making ritual, the in thing now is kidnapping for ransom and it is very lucrative and highly rewarding. In the South East region, the headquarters of kidnapping in Nigeria, the crime is now big business fetching the kidnappers an average of N750m (seven hundred and fifty million Naira) monthly.

    Relations of the rich and influential members of the society, including politicians, top government functionaries and even Nollywood stars are always their target and there is no age limit; young, old or aged, no problem, as long as their victim can bring in the ransom.

    The most vulnerable are children and the aged who are often defenceless and powerless. Each time these evil men strike our hearts break as was the case penultimate weekend when the 82-year old mother of Nigeria’s Finance Minister and Co-ordinating Minister for the Economy Mrs. Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala was kidnapped at Ogwuashi-Uku, Delta State. Professor Kamene Okonjo, a professor of Medicine was kidnapped by gunmen at the palace of the traditional ruler of the town. She spent five days with the kidnappers before she was rescued by security agents. To secure her release or rescue, whichever way you want to put it, the kidnappers, according to unconfirmed reports were paid N9 million.

    As usual nobody confirms this kind of payment but we all know it happens. Even the police do at times advise families of victims to pay the ransom to secure the release of their loved ones. More often than not we only hear that the victims have been set free by their abductors and not rescued by the police.

    Just as the nation was still adjusting to the reality of the kidnapping Professor Okonjo another old woman was being abducted in Ibadan, Oyo State. The wife of a former Military Governor of old Western State Gen. Oluwole Rotimi, Titilayo, was kidnapped in front of her haulage company, AOP Logistics Limited, on the new Ibadan-Ife Expressway at about 6.30 pm last Monday. And just over the weekend a Nollywood actress and Special Assistant to the Governor of Imo State on Public Affairs, Nkiru Sylvanus was kidnapped on the street in Owerri, the state capital. Her abductors want N100m. Though they are not likely to get paid in full, something substantial will be paid as ransom; so the business continues.

    It is quite surprising and annoying that the police still have not found a solution to this problem in spite of the numerous shake ups and reshuffles that usually take place after each case of high profile kidnapping. Some are even insinuating that some elements in the force are working together with these kidnappers. Considering the unenviable record of the Nigeria Police, this cannot be ruled out. Remember the Iyamu story in the Benin robbery ring of Lawrence Aninih and Monday Osunbor during General Ibrahim Babangida presidency? Iyamu, a police officer was later discovered to be part of the notorious armed robbery gang when Aninih and co stated ‘singing’ when they were arrested. Promises of radical changes to the Police were made then but nothing changed. Recall that a one time Assistant Inspector General of Police in charge of the Southeast zone at the height of kidnapping in the area who failed woefully to curb the menace was instead of being fired promoted as the Inspector General of Police after the then IG who hails from the area was fired for incompetence.

    The tragedies we often associate with the ‘ember months are not peculiar to Nigeria. Last Friday in far away United States of America, a 20-year old man, Adam Lanza walked into Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, dressed in black battle fatigue and a military vest and began firing. By the time he was done, 26 were dead- 20 of them young students between ages six and seven. The nation with a notorious gun culture was not only shocked but also broken-hearted following the tragedy. We also share in the grieve of the families of the victims including that of a 27-year old female teacher in the school who hid her students inside the cupboards when Lanza, the agent of death came calling in her class, telling him the children were in the gym. He shot her dead. What a brave woman. I hope we have teachers like that in Nigeria who in the face of death would be ready to protect their students. I doubt.

    In the midst of all these, the curse of aviation descended on Nigeria again when a military helicopter conveying VIPs from Nembe in Bayelsa State to Port-Harcourt, Rivers State crashed into the creeks killing all on board. Among the dead were the Governor of Kaduna State Patrick Yakowa, former National Security Adviser Gen. Owoye Azazi, their aides and the two-man crew.

    Our hearts are broken and bleed as yet another accident from the sky has claimed lives in this country. Recall that some years back another military helicopter crashed in Makurdi killing some Generals. Have you forgotten the Nigeria Air Force Hercules C-130 crash in Lagos during the Babangida era that killed whole generation of middle ranking military officers from the Army, Navy and Air Force? Too many accidents involving our military aircraft are becoming worrisome. And this call for urgent action on the part of the military high command.

    President Goodluck Jonathan as the Commander-In-Chief must take more than a passive interest in what is going on in our military aviation. Just as attention is being focused on civil aviation by the Federal Government the military arm, especially the Air Force, Navy and even the Police deserve similar attention. We cannot afford to continue to lose lives like this.