The Nation Newspaper

Tag: communicate

  • Teaching doctors to communicate

    Teaching doctors to communicate

    There are some stories that just refuse to go away.  They keep popping up in various ways until all possible angles are exhausted.  The story of Oluchi Anekwe’s death is one of them.  And I am about to explore my own angle to it by proposing a review of the medical curriculum.

    The sad tale of the young lady’s death reminded me of a small, seemingly insignificant book presentation that I attended on July 8, 2015 in Lagos.  The book, Medicine Abroad, was presented to a few journalists by the author, Dr Adaeze Ifezulike.  The only other person present was her brother, Mr Mike Ogbalu.  There was no chairman, chief launcher, or special dignitaries to buy copies for huge amounts; and no representatives from the Medical and Dental Council of Nigerian (MDCN), National Universities Commission (NUC), or the Nigerian Medical Association (NMA) – Just the two of them, and, us.

    But I thought it was insightful that she wrote the book.  She trained as a medical doctor at the University of Nigeria Nsukka (UNN) before relocating to the United Kingdom to practice.  Before she came up to talk about herself and the book, her brother had given us an insight into the kind of person she was.  As a student in Nigeria, Dr Ifezulike was used to coming tops.  She had a clean academic record all through her studies.  However, she had her first taste of failure when she had to be assessed before she could practice in the UK.  It was not in the theory or practice of medicine that she fell short, but in patient management.

    It was because of the differences in the ways patients are managed in our hospitals compared to the Western world that Dr Ifezulike wrote the book.  She said these differences, which she observed in her 16 years of practicing abroad, were among the reasons why two-thirds of doctors trained in Africa get axed abroad according to a research conducted by The Telegraph.

    The cultural perception of doctors as know-alls in Nigeria, which affects how they treat their patients, is not the same as in the UK and other parts of Europe.  Over there, she said the doctors respect their patients and do not impose their knowledge.  In our country, doctors are so revered they are nearly feared.

    In the story I wrote of that event, published on July 16, 2015, she said: “In our culture here in Nigeria, the doctor is regarded as king. Moving over to UK, I found that the consultation is between equals. I understood that you don’t just tell a patient this is what you need to do.  It is so important that there is a rapport. The patient must be made to feel that he is a part of the decision.” (http://staging.thenationonlineng.net/book-to-help-african-trained-doctors-survive-in-uk/)

    She hoped that the MDCN and the NUC would review the medical training curriculum to change the way doctors communicate with patients here in Nigeria. She wrote the book to guide African-trained doctors about the cultural differences they must be aware of to practice successfully.

    That call has become more pressing now following the death of Oluchi Anekwe at the University of Lagos (UNILAG) last week.  Her family blames her death on the negligence of the health workers at the UNILAG Medical Centre when she was brought in.  They claim she was alive by the time they took her to the centre but was not immediately attended to.  However, the doctors have said that she was already dead by the time she arrived because there was no pulse.  It may have been so, since they are the professionals and know what to check.  However, they did not communicate appropriately.  I have used public hospitals enough to know that this was the case.  When you enter to see a doctor, he asks your symptoms.  While you are talking, he takes down notes, examines you if necessary, then gives you a prescription and you leave.  I have left the hospital many times and when I was asked what the doctor said was wrong I could not answer because I was not told – and did not ask.  The only times I have been told anything was when I asked questions.

    After noticing there was no pulse when Oluchi was rushed to the Medical Centre, rather than ignore the concerns of her sisters, who believed she was still alive and something could be done, the doctors should found ways to tell them the situation.  The explanation that they asked for identity cards to buy time is not tenable.

    Like Dr Ifezulike noted, I agree that Nigerian doctors must learn to build rapport with their patients and respect them.  Not all patients are ignorant or inferior.  Even if they are, they deserve to be respected.  A course in Patient Management – complete with how to communicate with a variety of patients should be part of the Nigerian medical curriculum, if it is not already there.  If it is there, then there needs to be a change in how it is taught.

  • Why you must communicate with your partner

    Communication is very important in any relationship. It is the fuel on which the engine of a relationship runs. In our homes, communication is the building block of intimacy in marriage because through it, spouses convey their thoughts and feelings to each other.

    For two people from different backgrounds to come to live together as one is not easy at all. Effective communication is really the only way they can understand themselves and also be able to tolerate each other’s strength and shortcomings.

    Therefore, for better interaction, the sender who conveys the message must make sure that the information is clear, while the receiver must also be sure that the message is clear, heard and understood. The big question that comes to mind while dealing with this major aspect of relationship is how do we communicate?

    We communicate in different ways, verbal and non-verbal.

    Verbal communication is simply the use of wordswhat we say, how we say it and when we say it. Spoken words are very powerful. They can make or destroy a marriage or relationship. Words we speak to our spouses or friends register more in their minds, whether harsh or kind. As we know, in our society, spoken words are compared to a broken egg that cannot be put together again. The truth is that your body language or attitude can be misinterpreted, but spoken words are usually difficult or nearly impossible to deny. Some homes today are suffering from spoken words said carelessly. Relationships have turned sour because of harsh words and so on.

    However, non-verbal communication is a process through which we interact without talking. Instances include attitude, eye contact and body language during conversation. Physical expression like hugs, handshakes, kisses and a pat on the back are also kinds of non-verbal communication.

    We cannot overlook the three important elements of good communication. They are WHAT WE SAY, HOW   WE SAY IT AND WHEN WE SAY IT.

    What we say: Our choice of words is very important in order for us to have an effective communication with our spouses or friends. The words we use to express ourselves matter a lot because if not said properly, they might pass a wrong message.

    Take for example, a woman who is worried about her husband, working late for the fear of the danger of the night might express her concerns wrongly. Instead of choosing her words in order to relate the right message to her husband, she may say it in a way that her husband would think she is accusing him of self-centeredness or unfaithfulness. Reactions to situations like this might vary, depending on the temperament of the man or his perception of the message. Some would become aggressive, especially if they are wrongly accused; some would go completely silent and others might complain to their friends and relatives, or decide to stay so late in order to avoid  nagging or false accusation. Therefore, our message must be clear for easy understanding.

    What we say: Instead of complaining, ask questions. Then, express your concern, while being mindful of your choice of words, so that you don’t miss the point. Understand your spouse’s  or friend’s personality type and talk accordingly. Be specific and simple, while interacting with your spouse or friend. Always think before you say anything.

    How we say it: How do we present our message? How do we make our point clear without missing the main issue? Understanding your spouse and knowing the approach that is suitable for her or him are very important. How we convey our message, either through word or action, must be clearly understood to avoid misinterpretation.

    When we say it: The timing or rather, when we choose to speak is also an important aspect of communication with our spouses. Talking at the right time is an aspect that must not be neglected. Understanding your spouse’s or partner’s mood tells you if he or she will be ready to listen to your conversation at that given time. Timing is very vital in communication- know when to talk so that you can get a good response.

    Ability to listen attentively during communication is crucial as well. You must listen to each other in the process of interacting. Most of the times, we hear our spouse or partner talking without us listening.

    Moreover, couples, for instance, that communicate effectively tend to understand each other better. They smoothen out their differences easily as communication takes away barriers and obstacles. In addition, a relationship or bond is created between them and this gets stronger by the day.

    They work as a team for the good of their family. Marriage is an institute and we learn every day. Couples that communicate are constantly learning from each other at all times. Conversation really takes care of many needs. As a matter of fact, good communication in marriage solves most problems. It helps spouses to have their feelings and thoughts heard and respected.

     

    Harriet Ogbobine is a counsellor and  motivational speaker. Send in your questions and suggestions to her on bineharriet@gmail.com. You can also follow her on twitter@bineharrietj or txt messages only to 08023058805.

  • Communicate your ideas: Public Speaking Icon (4)

    Communicate your ideas: Public Speaking Icon (4)

    One of the easily identifiable traits of wise people is their ability to improve on their knowledge. They realise that no one knows it all. There are always people who are more experienced than us and knowledge is progressive. Whatever information we have today may be obsolete by tomorrow because the only constant thing in life is change. Whoever closes his/her mind to new information is heading for a life of isolation. Hence, we have constantly emphasized the need to keep learning in this column. In agreement with this commitment, it is my pleasure to bring you another Public Speaking Icon today. I admire him because he is multi-talented. His leadership style is also worthy of emulation, and he has great people skills. Hey, why should I tell you all about him when you can meet him yourself? For your reading pleasure and enlightenment, I bring you Mr. Alfred Olomukoro.

    Alfred Olomukoro

    Alfred Olomukoro is a theatre art practitioner and a comedian. He owns a training academy known as Ekwebility Professional Academy, where he is the principal facilitator. “Ekwe” in Delta means laughter, so the academy focuses on developing the ability to make people laugh in its students. The Academy has had the privilege of consulting for the United Nations. Alfred is also an actor, a director, and a professionally trained compère. He also recently authored a book titled, Scores to Settle, a collection of short stories. I leave you with Fred Olomukoro.

    Factors responsible for interest in comedy

    While in primary school, I always loved to tell stories in class. I even narrated movies to my classmates. Gradually, they got so used to it that during any free period, they would gather around me and expect me to tell them the latest movie- most of them were boarders, while I was a day student. But unknown to them, there were days I didn’t have a story to tell; so I would create some make believe stories on impulse. A title would evolve right there and then, and I would tell them the story, which they always believed. They were always quite captivated by the stories. I was gradually building myself in speaking without knowing. Comedy came into the scene because, in the cause of telling those stories, I added my own humour, my own flavor and I saw them laugh- I love to see people laugh. Also, my sisters enjoyed me reading a book or watching a movie instead of them doing it; they would wait for me to tell them the story. They believed my own version was more interesting than the original. All these developed my creativity in terms of humour and speaking. I seize every opportunity of an event to make a presentation, such a reciting a poem. That was how I got used to facing a crowd.

    First time before a crowd

    My first time before a crowd was in my primary school days. I participated in a drama presentation, and I did quite well. I wasn’t too shaken by the crowd. I had already rehearsed in the class, so I was not a victim of pressure or stage fright. In secondary school, I continued like that. Though a little fear would naturally come, but as long as I am prepared, I will overcome it.

    Difference between facing a crowd as a master of event (compère) and as a comedian

    There is a big difference. In the Nigerian context, most people simply assume that if you are a comedian, you must also be a compère, but it doesn’t really work like that. This has robbed a lot of compères their jobs because people expected that they must make people laugh. You can be a compère, but you may not be a comedian. A comedian’s basic job is to make people laugh. Nevertheless, a comedian should train as a compère to learn how to observe protocols appropriately. As a comedian, your humour must apply to your audience. It has to impart the people because humour speaks volume. They will laugh, but there should be a message. Your major goal is to hear the outburst of laughter. So, you must put in the required humour ingredients that will stir up people to laugh. A speaker needs to have a very good opening; it could be via humour, or statistics on the subject matter, or stories, people love stories. Also, as a comedian, your first joke is your major joker. If you give a fantastic first joke, even if the next one is not as interesting as the first, the initial one will linger in their minds, so they will still laugh. It is also good that you leave them with the humour that will cause them to ask for more, so that you can leave the stage when the ovation is loudest. These are some of the things we teach at Ekwebility Academy.

    How easy is it to be funny?

    A lot of people think comedy is easy or cheap, but it is not. It is not easy to be funny. Comedians do say this and it is true; I have been on stage as a comedian, and I am also a trainer, so I’ve seen both sides of it. Nigerians are passing through economic depression, so sometimes when they come to events like that, you don’t know what’s running through their minds. And you want to make such people laugh? They may have been through a terrible traffic, or be experiencing delayed salaries, or victimization at the office, and they want a comic relieve at the event. As a comedian, it is your task to make them laugh. You must have that natural ability in you- there is something in you that makes you original and funny. This interesting interview with Fred Olomukoro continues next week by the grace of God, please make it a date.

  • communicate your ideas

    Hello there! Welcome to this column on public speaking. I believe you are reading this article because you want to learn how to communicate your ideas effectively to other people, or you simply want to be better in the art of public speaking. Whatever your reasons are for reading this column, I hope you find the experience quite rewarding. We shall examine several aspects of speaking, starting from the concept of communication. We shall also pay particular attention to answering questions that may be raised by readers; this is a major part of the learning process. Considering that we meet and communicate with several people every day, the knowledge of public speaking is recommended for everyone. Do enjoy the experience.

     

    Communication: you do even when you don’t!

    It is quite interesting how we assume we know some things, but when we are faced with them, we realise we don’t know them as well as we think we do. Take communication, for instance. Well, everyone knows what communications is! Or so we think. Some say it is talking to someone else and some others simply say it involves passing across a message to another person. While they are not wrong, communication goes farther than that.

    Communication is popularly defined as the process through which a source conceives and encodes a message and then passes it through a medium to a receiver who in turn decodes it and sends a feed back. Ok, that sounds academic. But it does not even completely capture the idea of communication. That’s because a lot of times, we communicate without deliberately conceiving the messages in our minds. As a matter of fact, there are several times we don’t even intend to communicate, yet we do. Take for instance, two or three students involuntarily yawning in a class while the lecture is in progress. Their actions send the message that they are tired or bored or both. Though they didn’t plan to communicate, they actually did, and a sensitive teacher may take note. Now think of all the times you have been accused of implying something you didn’t actually mean. It’s because you unconsciously did or said something that was misinterpreted by others. From this, we realise that we cannot but communicate.

    An influential cultural and media critic by the name Marshall McLuhan often asked the question, “Does a fish know it’s wet?” to which he would reply “No,” because the water is its natural habitat. It is when the fish is out of water that it realises that something is wrong. Have you ever noticed that you never pay attention to the fact that you are breathing unless you have a cold or some challenge with your breathing. How many people can tell the number of times they breathe in a minute? That is because it comes naturally to us. Likewise, we are so used to communication that we are not aware that we do.

    We live, eat, sleep, wear, and breathe communication. If you doubt this, kindly answer these questions for me: why do people associate certain food to specific parts of the country or continent? If an individual has an examination to write, yet he or she sleeps for 18 hours in a day, what will you expect? If a job applicant attends a bank interview wearing a pair of ragged jeans, a T-shirt, and a face cap facing backwards, what are the chances of him or her being employed? When you meet someone breathing hard and fast, what questions are you likely to ask that individual? The answers you give will show the messages you received from those actions. My point is this, there is nothing you will ever do or say that would not be interpreted to mean something by observers. Making meaning out of life is how we survive.

    More often than not, it is our involuntary communication that hurts us or the people around us the most. Since we don’t usually mean to send the messages, we don’t screen them to determine their effects on others. It is when they react that we start to play back our words or actions in our minds to find out what warranted that reactions, but by then, the deeds would have been done.

    It is therefore very risky to leave communication to chance. True, we cannot control everything we communicate, but we can sure try. One of the major ways we communicate is through our words. We can train ourselves to think before we speak and to skillfully present our ideas. We also have to learn not to speak if we don’t have anything to say, or people won’t take us serious when we actually want to make valuable contributions. The ability to speak clearly and convincingly is one of the most valuable assets one can have. Several people have spoken themselves into leadership and so can we.

    Thanks for following me through our topic for today. I hope you have derived as much fun and inspiration as I have. Join me again next week as we explore another important topic on public speaking. Please write to share your experiences and ideas through: You can also ask questions about our topic for today or any other one and I will be glad to make it a topic for discussion. Have a blessed week.