The Nation Newspaper

Tag: lessons

  • Lessons I learnt from my failed marriage—Kefee

    Lessons I learnt from my failed marriage—Kefee

     WHAT explains the reason behind your release of a double album some months ago?

    I am a spiritual person and in as much as I like to sing and dance I am still spiritual. So I decided to show people both sides of me; the part that loves to dance titled Beautiful and the part that is spiritual titled Chorus Leader. Without a strong spiritual life you will find it very hard to cope in the physical. Both albums are themed “The Best of Both Worlds” showcasing different sides of me.

    Are you trying to strike a balance between both sides of you?

    I wouldn’t say it is about me trying to strike a balance between both sides of me; it is just about me trying to do what I want to do. I am just being expressive with my talent; I am Kefee, I don’t have to copy what other people are doing. I have to be creative, I have a lot to write about and I have a lot to talk about too. My burden is to continue to inspire people with my songs and when I get positive comments from people on my works it encourages me to do more.

    Did music start for you in Church?

    Yes! Music started for me in the Church; I started singing and dancing in Church and I used to go with my late aunt. She also took me out for social events too and always enjoyed myself singing and dancing at every occasion we went to. I am usually the centre of attraction back then and people sprayed me with money. That was how it all started for me…

    You started out as a duo some years back. Why did you part ways with your other partner?

    It was only necessary that our individual goals and ambitions defined our co existence. As we grew up in life our values changed and the things we held so dear in the past no longer commanded primary attention. So, we had to move on; we did not part ways, we only moved on to greater fulfillment for the purpose our creation.

    As a young girl from the Niger Delta, were you not scared you were going to face stiff competition as an artiste when you went pro?

    I am not scared of competition; I believe everybody has a place under the sun. Everyone has equal opportunities and it also depends on how well you use the opportunities that come your way. I never worried about competition because I was sure about my talent and the strength of my songs.

    How have you been able to stay relevant in an industry where most people listen to hip hop?

    I do a bit of hip hop too but most people know me as a gospel artiste. I try to work with a lot of people and that keeps me relevant. I like experimenting with music; I love hip hop and my husband is a big fan of that music genre. I love rap too and I draw a lot of inspiration from rap greats like Rakeem. I try to do anything that music allows me to do and I don’t just dwell on waxing traditional songs which has come to be my trademark on the music scene.

    Have your works been anyway affected by piracy?

    Yes! Piracy is a painful reality that confronts musicians, actors, writers and all others that have one form of intellectual property or the other. The presence of piracy and its very debilitating and traumatising effect has diminished us all. I see mix tapes of my songs and videos with no royalty coming to me. However, I am positive that things will soon change for good.

    Your debut song Branama brought you so much fame when you started. How were you able to hold your own at the time?

    Having been brought up by my parents in a home where love, humility and discipline were the hallmark of growing up, it was only natural for those values to still be part and parcel of me. I never lost touch of where I was coming from. I never forgot the fact that I am a child of God and the fact that all that we have today was truly given by Him. So, the fact that I was devoted to God helped me handle the fame that came with the success of my debut single Branama.

    What inspired you into writing that song?

    Branama was inspired by a grateful heart; I was just thanking God for all he had done in my life at the time. God gave me a reason to celebrate and Branama means shakara; I had reasons to show people what God has done for me. I wasn’t really known at the time and I was just a girl who was relatively popular in Sapele, Delta State before I came to Lagos.

    Most people seem not to be able to balance your extravagant outlook with your spiritual life. What is your opinion on that?

    People should not try to balance other people’s lives because I am not like every other person. Everybody cannot be the same because life has no manual; I try to do everything I can with my talent and that makes me who I am. I try to get the best out of whatever talent that I have because everybody cannot encourage you, but at least there are people who value what I do.

    The tempo of your songs seems to be on the rise; Branama was a mid-tempo tune and Kokoroko is a high tempo song. Are you moving with the current trend?

    For the song Kokoroko, I would say I was just doing good music except you want us to do a remix. Branama is a danceable song and so is the song Kokoroko, like I said earlier, I try different things because that is what creativity is all about. I cannot do everything the same way; variety is the spice of life and that makes the whole thing interesting.

    What’s ‘Branama Afrique’ all about?

    Branama Afrique (which means show off Africa) is a brand that is involved in aggressively redefining the African persona. It is the definition of our expressions, our strength, panache, beauty and values. It is more like cultural reloading.

    What’s your greatest desire as a married woman?

    I have already told God what I want from Him; if I tell you what I want you will not be able to do it for me (laughs). Whatever I want God to do for me has been tabled with the most high and I know He will do it in His time. Whenever I call on God, He always answers me.

    How did the cooking part of you take shape?

    My mum loves to cook and I learnt everything about cooking from her; she was always cooking and I was always standing in the kitchen trying to monitor things. I used to enjoy her cooking too and that somewhat prepared me for the business I am involved in at the moment which is called Branama Kitchen. That was how I got interested in the area of cooking before I thought of making money off it.

    At what time did it occur to you that you could make money out of cooking?

    I decided to get a restaurant after I was totally convinced about my cooking skills in 2005. I remember I just released Branama 2 at the time. I was actually going around looking for a place, but I couldn’t get a suitable place. I was still searching for a place until 2011 when I finally got a place. I started thinking about having a restaurant where I could further display my cooking skills and get paid for it.

    You have three full-time jobs as a wife, an artiste and a business woman. How do you manage your time because you don’t look stressed in anyway?

    I don’t work alone; I have people working for me and I have a husband that understands what I do. That makes it easier on the home front. I also try to live up to my expectations as a housewife. I have people who love my music and who try to contribute their own quota to ensure that I get the best out of my music. At work, I also have people who take care of things too and that makes it possible for me to be able to balance all the activities I get myself involved in on a daily basis.

    Very few people would resign from a lucrative banking career for the uncertain. This, Irikefe Obareki did when she plunged headlong into the murky waters of the music industry 11 years ago, and today the Delta State-born artiste is enjoying wide acceptance in Nigeria and around Africa. In this interview with AHMED BOULOR, the Branama exponent bared her mind on a range of issues such as her first marriage, her current album and Branama Kitchen, among other sundry issues.

     

    What major lessons did you learn from your last marriage with Alec Godwin?

    It only opened my eyes more to what life is all about; if you don’t go through challenges you never become a stronger person. That was a chapter in my life that was meant to make me stronger as a person. People go through challenges and that was my story and when we couldn’t carry on any longer, we had to part ways.

    What have been the gains of your current marriage to Teddy Esosa?

    My husband is a very nice guy and I am actually writing a book about my first marriage. The bottom line is that I am happy and if you ask me, this is the first time I am getting married.

    How did you meet your husband?

    We’ve known each other for a long time, and when he felt it was time, he proposed to me. The rest is now history, like they say…

    How often does he rush home to eat your meals?

    He comes home straight to eat my meals; he doesn’t really eat outside the house. He also comes to Branama Kitchen to unwind too.

  • False report has taught me lessons, says Mrs. Ajimobi

    WIFE of the Oyo State Governor, Chief (Mrs.) Florence Ajimobi, yesterday said the publication of her fictitious arrest in London has strengthened her.

    Mrs. Ajimobi, who addressed reporters at the University College Hospital (UCH), Ibadan where she visited cancer patients, also said that the issue has taught her to be more careful in all that she does.

    She, however, cautioned against playing dirty politics.

    She said: “The report has made me a very strong person and it has helped me to be more careful in everything I do. The news has not been a palatable one. I don’t think we should play dirty politics.”

    The Oyo State branch of the Association of Local Governments of Nigeria (ALGON) also condemned the false report.

    In a release by its secretary, Prince Ayodeji Aleshinloye, ALGON advised the media to always check facts before reporting stories that could malign individuals or organisations.

    It said Mrs. Ajimobi built her reputation over the years through hard work and integrity.

    The statement reads:  ‘’Mrs. Ajimobi went to London to perform her motherly role by taking her 14- year- old daughter back to school.

    “Before she became the First Lady, she had always been making trips to London to see her children who school there and for some people to start questioning the fact that she had travelled out of the country 52 times since the inauguration of her husband as the governor is laughable”.

     

  • ‘Lessons life has taught me’

    ‘Lessons life has taught me’

    Like the queen of hearts, Aisha Babangida-Shinkafi’s love for the underprivileged is apparent in her continual quest to impact positively on their lives, courtesy of her Better Life Project (BLP). “I know God brought me into this world to do just what I am doing because I have never enjoyed doing something so rewarding as this and I am totally enjoying it,” she enthused. Aisha has evolved from the proverbial silver spooned-kid to a self-driven compassionate being. In this chat with KAYODE OLANSHILE ALFRED, Aisha bares her mind on her BLP dream and sundry issues.

    You have touched many lives through your Better Life Project (BLP). How does it make you feel when you see people relieved from their hardship?

    I feel fulfilled and truly inspired. Inspired to do more, fulfilled that people smile thereafter. This will enable them secure their children’s future, learn skills and education.

    So, how many people have benefited from your BLP?

    There is absolutely no way I am going to count the number of people I might have supported. That defeats the art of giving from your heart. But I know that we are creating an enabling environment for them to learn through adult literacy programs, to learn skills through skills acquisition programs. This, we have, God willing, been able to get a lot of women involved and participating in the programs. So, if along the line, they are in their thousands, then I have to do more.

    How far would you say better life has succeeded in pursuing this vision and mission?

    BLP is work in progress. It is not something we rush into, because it involves lives. It is a legacy for me, for you, for my children, our children and their children. So we are getting there steadily but firmly. It is also important that the structures are in place. I have one mission in life right now with the BLP, and that is to educate and empower millions of families, especially women. With the support we have from amazing families, friends and various organisations, we will succeed, God willing.

    Is Better Life Project in line with your late mother’s vision?

    Absolutely! Empowering women with education and skills is the only way forward for the rural women. So, we have continued that way, with added programs such as the ”Servant Learners’’. We embarked on the Servant Learner Program to give the youths an opportunity to interact, live and impact with the rural people in their own environment. Then, there is the Village Community Feeding Programme. During the of Ramadan, it was an exceptional success, thanks to the Dangote Group, that graciously and generously supported the feeding program with food items. The BLP awards scholarship to children from various communities with our Scholarship Program so that they can further their education.

    What are you doing differently that your mom didn’t do with the project?

    I tell people that God brought me into this world to do just what I am doing because I have never enjoyed doing something so rewarding as this and I am totally enjoying it. So, everything we are doing or will do has been and will be in line with my mother’s vision. I just fine-tune the little details. And the exciting thing is that I physically participate and enjoy being in the villages.

    What are the major challenges of your project?

    Well, we thank God we have not encountered any major challenges. But as I said, this is because of the devoted family and friends that support us endlessly. Personally, my only challenge is not being able to be here and there always.

    What is the greatest lesson life has taught you?

    Never ever take anyone for granted and learn to respect and appreciate every single person I meet in life.

    Would you say you have enough time for your family?

    Totally! They are my priority and my passion.

    Your role as a wife?

    My role is to nourish, learn, appreciate, respect and love unconditionally.

    Who are your role models?

    My parents have been and will always be my role models. But I have a few people that do inspire me. First is Mohammed Yunus. Then, there is an amazing woman in Justice Mary Odili.

    When did you discover that the most important part of one’s life is to be prayerful and be close to God?

    Allah SWT has always been in my life. But seeing what other people less fortunate than me go through has brought me even closer to God. I have very strong parents who instilled the teachings of Allah, the importance of prayers, charity, and humility in my siblings and me. I am trying to instill that into my kids and those close to me.

    What gives you the greatest joy in life?

    Putting a smile on people and being around loved ones.

    What do you like about being a Nigerian woman?

    Well, I walk with my head held high being a Nigerian woman, and enjoying the admiration of being a Nigerian.

    Which of the Nigerian women do you like, admire and look up to?

    They are a lot, but as I said, Justice Odili, Senator Zainab Kure, I could go on and on.

  • Teaming lessons from johannesburg

    Teaming lessons from johannesburg

    The end was finally here.  Ten strangers stood up to leave, but not before exchanging hugs, business cards and some homemade jam.  As last words of appreciation and revelation filled the room, some of these compatriots were shaken by strong currents of emotion that washed over them.  They were happy to be returning to their normal lives, yet sad because somewhere deep inside they wondered if they would ever see each other again.  They had come to know, support, learn from and laugh, bond and have fun with each other, over the past four days.  At that moment, these ten strangers, if they had desired it, could easily and successfully have taken on the world as a collective.
    This was the scene at the end of my four-day Insights Discovery Licensed Practitioner Accreditation Program in Johannesburg. I was struck by the fact that there was more sharing, caring, support, learning and authenticity in those four days than I have had in some of the corporate teams that I have spent years with. In less than a week, we had established more intellectual and emotional connections than most teams see in years.  There were no “rights” or “wrongs”; no good or bad; no winners or losers – only individual differences that flavored the learning experience with richness that benefitted everyone. It is this experience with my nine South African colleagues that inspired me to dedicate this week’s article to the concept of “Winning Teams”.
    A team can be described as a group of people coming together to achieve a common objective. Every team is a group but not every group is a team. The challenge in many organizations is the illusion that they have teams, when what they really have are groups of people who never truly evolve into teams, much less transform into “Winning Teams”.  My definition of a winning team is, “A defined set of individuals, with complementary behaviors, executing interdependent tasks in a deliberate manner, unified by their commitment to common objectives and achieving a heightened state of collective performance that is superior to the sum of their individual results.”
    I recognize that this is a fully loaded definition that requires some “unpacking”. So, let me break it down.
    1. A team is a defined set of individuals.  There must be a high degree of distinction between those who are part of the team and those who are not. It is essential to know who matters and who does not.  Imagine a competitive football game in which members of both teams wore the same jersey and wore masks to hide their faces. How would a player know who to pass the ball to and who to support? A team must have borders that allow it to define and sustain its identity.
    2. Members of a team exhibit complementary behaviors. They act in ways that complement each other and their actions when taken together form a complete and balanced whole. In a team, members supply each other’s needs and make up for what is lacking in one another. In order to accomplish this, there must be a high degree of self and interpersonal awareness that leads to mutual respect and valuing.
    3. Members of a team execute interdependent tasks. There is a high degree of mutual dependence that exists between the tasks to be accomplished in team settings.  Consequently, teamwork is essential for teams to deliver great results.  There must be a high degree of responsibility and accountability between team members because of the high degree of interdependence. No single task on its own can accomplish the desired objectives.
    4. Members of a team work in a deliberate manner.  Team members carefully and thoughtfully weigh their actions and consider the impact those actions have on team members and team results. They execute their responsibilities within the team in a purposeful, premeditated and voluntary manner.  They are fully engaged and fully plugged into what needs to be done to accomplish the team’s goals.
    5. Members of a team are unified by common goals. This is what transforms a collection of people into a team. Without common purpose, there is no alignment, focus, accountability or integrity within the group.  When members do not buy into the collective vision, the energy and resources of the group which could have been applied to create synergies and leverage are, instead, dissipated i.e. is wasted or squandered.  Commonality of goals implies that there are no hidden agendas.
    6. Team results must be superior to the sum of individual parts. At the heart of teamwork is the belief that individuals are able to achieve higher levels of performance and outputs when they cooperate, than when they don’t.  Teams give members the opportunity to focus and specialize in what they know how to do best. A winning team is a team that is able to deliver results that exceed what its members can achieve working alone.
    Is your team a winning team or are you just pretending to be one?