The Nation Newspaper

Tag: lies

  • Re: Lies against Enugu

    I read Gabriel Amalu’s Law and Public Power column published in The Nation of January 15, noting particularly the judgment passed on the government of Governor Ifeanyi Ugwuanyi of Enugu State.

    I begin with a quote taken from the address delivered by Sir Winston Churchill to the British House of Commons on June 4, 1940.

    “We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight on the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.”

    I have read quite a few things about this man that has been rated one of the best British prime ministers of all times but I have never come across where it was written that he was a great soldier, naval officer or fighter pilot. In fact, Churchill was as famed with his World War II rallying speeches as he was with drunkenness and oftentimes, irreverent trysts with women.

    But Britain remember their prime minister for the great speeches he delivered that helped mobilize the people to push back invading Nazi forces, restoring the British empire in the process and most would agree that had Churchill not emerged in place of Neville Chamberlain in 1940, Britain would have lost the war and the allied forces would not have had the chance to defeat Hitler.

    Why did I have to go through this route in responding to an article that, as far as I can decipher, has scant information as its foundation and political prejudice as pillars?

    Much the same way as Sir Churchill employed great oratory to re-ignite spirits of nationalism among Britons during the rather challenging periods that Hitler was almost overrunning England between 1939 and 1940, Governor Ifeanyi Ugwuanyi has been able to employ genuine spirituality in tuning the minds of the people of Enugu State to higher goals that has engendered unprecedented peace in Enugu State.

    Before the coming of Governor Ifeanyi Ugwuanyi, armed robbery and violent crimes of all frightening shades had become second nature to Enugu. The institutions of higher learning in the state were hotbeds of cult activities, with killings occurring brazenly every other day. Enugu State University of Science and Technology was called “War College” as a result of the incessant cult clashes of those locust years.

    It is unimaginable for anyone to conclude that in always mentioning that “Enugu State is in the hands of God,” Ugwuanyi had put the state on autopilot, leaving the people and their affairs at the mercy of the elements. As a practicing Christian, Governor Ugwuanyi strongly believes in faith. But he also understands that such faith has to be accompanied by good works as clearly stated in the Bible. And that is why all over the state, his exemplary leadership style has been positively impacting the people.

    I understand the writer’s pain and hurt with regards to some identified development challenges in his community, Ogwofia Owa in Ezeagu Local Government Area. He talked at length about the sorry state of the Native Authority road and, in all sincerity, I feel his disappointment.

    But did he also take time to go round some other communities in Ezeagu Local Government Area just to be sure the government was not active in development projects in those areas? While I am aware of the importance of access roads in the social and economic life of the people, it also remains a narrow prism from which a fair and proper appraisal of government can be done.

    I say this because facts before me point to other development strides in and around his community. Owa has always been one community before some of the present autonomous communities were created. If he had moved around Owa during this period, he would have been able to notice the improvements in some of the primary schools in the area. His Excellency, Governor Ifeanyi Ugwuanyi undertook to rebuild primary schools and had started with blocks of 3-5 classrooms in almost all the primary schools in the state. So far, 208 of such projects have taken place across the state. There is one at Central School, Owa Imezi. There is another one at Aguobu Owa High School. Community Secondary School, Umana Ndiagu; Community Primary School, Uwani Umumba Ndiagu and Community Primary School, Akama Oghe, all in Ezeagu Local Government Area, are among the 208 of such rebuilt schools already delivered by the government of Enugu State.

    It needs be emphasized that this is the first time since the administration of former Governor Jim Nwobodo between 1979 and 1983 that such vast overhaul of schools have taken place in the state.

    I am sure it would not have taken much to also notice that electricity has been provided for Awha Ndiagu community. This community had no electricity before now. This government ensured this was done.

    I am sure the writer is not aware of the “One Community, One Project” programme of the Enugu State Government through which every “autonomous community” is empowered to undertake a development project of their choice. Through the town union and traditional ruler, the sum of N5 million was disbursed at a time.

    Lastly, if it was while moving around that the writer also discovered that retirees from the Enugu State Water Corporation and those of Daily Star were owed over 81 months of pension arrears, then that must have been some movement! Now did it occur to the writer that 81 months is equivalent of almost seven years? And that Governor Ugwuanyi had been in office for less than four years?

    Is he also aware that both the Enugu State Water Corporation and Daily Star are supposed to be revenue generating parastatals of government? That long before Governor Ugwuanyi came into office, the Enugu State Water Corporation was no longer generating anything and that corruption conspired with elements in the corporation to shut down water supply from Ajali in his local government area as well as the one from Oji River? Governor Ugwuanyi only recently rehabilitated these water projects, renewing the supply of water into the Enugu capital city after many years?

     

    • Okuhu is a media aide to Governor Ugwuanyi.
  • Wike’s penchant for lies may destroy him, says Peterside

    Wike’s penchant for lies may destroy him, says Peterside

    THE 2015 governorship candidate of the All Progressives Congress (APC) in Rivers State, Dr Dakuku Peterside, has stated that Governor Nyesom Wike’s penchant for lies may destroy him.

    He reacted yesterday in Port Harcourt through his aide to remarks by Wike, who claimed that as commissioner for Works in the last administration, Peterside did not build a road to Opobo/Nkoro, his council.

    Peterside, who is the director-general of the Nigeria Maritime Administration and Safety Agency (NIMASA), however, declared that Wike was fond of deceiving the people, who he said see through Wike’s lies.

    He said: “I served as commissioner for Works in Rivers State, at a time when one of the pillars of the administration was infrastructural development. Dr Peter Odili’s administration, through the instrumentality of then Deputy Governor, Sir Gabriel Toby, initiated the Ogoni-Andoni-Opobo Unity Road, a total of 37 kilometres, with 10 bridges and many culverts. Unfortunately, the administration was winding up, so could only do two bridges and got the road to Iwoama Asarama, achieving 26 per cent of the total job scope.

    “That was the point we met the road. At the insistence of the Amanyanabo of Opobo and the people of Nkoro, we did a new alignment to Nkoro, taking it to Kalaibiama and from there to Opobo Town, thus introducing the Nkoro-Kalaibiama-Opobo town alignment of 11.5 kilometres and four bridges.

    ‘’With the change in alignment, the unity road became 44.09 kilometres, as against 37.7 kilometres awarded by the Odili administration in 2005. In all, six bridges were completed under my watch and two bridges (Nos 9 and 10) were at 70 per cent and 50 per cent completion, at the end of the Amaechiadministration in 2015.

    “We started driving to Nkoro Town and I drove down to Kalaibiama Town in Opobo to campaign in 2015.  This is the true situation of things, which Rivers people know, especially those from Andoni and Opobo. Similarly, those from Ikuru Town could drive home, I did that with the then Deputy Governor,Tele Ikuru, many times.”

     

     

     

     

     

     

  • Amosun’s legacies and their lies

    Sir: Humanity must be saddened and to say the least of the good people of Ogun State, for the circus of politics destiny has thrust on them in the past weeks and months.

    In the past weeks, the social media was awash with some jaundiced story of how operatives of the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) invaded the residence of a sitting governor. Those who planted the story knew that it is fake and to further help them put an end to their delusion, the EFCC has spoken: “Governor Amosun was neither under surveillance nor was any of his residence raided by operatives of the EFCC. Consequently, members of the public are enjoined to disregard the false report.”

    It is important to state that the Ogun State government does not need an EFCC rebuttal to put a lie to that allegation, the good people of Ogun State know the truth, they remain Senator Ibikunle Amosun’s pillar of support. In 2011, when he was first given the mandate to govern Ogun State, it was the triumph of truth over lies. That feat was repeated in 2015, an endorsement of his sprawling legacies spread across the three senatorial districts of the state.

    You cannot deny the existence of the six lane Ogun standard roads/flyovers, linking NNPC with Iyana-Mortuary at one end and the Brewery-Lafenwa-Itoku-Sapon-Idiaba.  Sagamu Benin Express-Oba Erinwo seven kilometres road wears the Amosun signature. Also completed are flyover bridges at Lagos Garage and Mabolufon junction, both in Ijebu-Ode. The road from Illishan connecting Ago-Iwoye is over eighty percent completed.

    Ota got a total facelift with six lane road network crisscrossing the entire township, a departure from the once-upon-a-time failed Ilo-Awela/Ota roads. Also very critical to the administration is the ongoing construction of the 32 kilometres Sango-Ijoko-Ojodu-Abiodun six lane Ogun standard road and flyover bridges. Amosun has successfully changed the narratives with the provision of five bridges along that stretch, flying over densely populated and flood prone areas. Imagine the value of linking Sango-Ota-Idiroko road with the Lagos-Ibadan express road at Berger and connecting an international road corridor at Idiroko.

    These are the testimonials of the “mission to rebuild Ogun State”.

    For those who specialize in concocting baseless lies, thinking they can hoodwink the people and market a blemished product, they have failed because our people are intelligent and politically astute.

     

    • Eshomomoh Imoudu,

    Abeokuta, Ogun State.

  • Buhari ‘laughs at lies’ on his health

    Buhari ‘laughs at lies’ on his health

    President Muhammadu Buhari yesterday laughed at lies on his state of health,  Imo State Governor Rochas Okorocha said after a meeting in London.

    Okorocha led some All Progressives Congress (APC) governors in company with National Chairman John Odigie-Oyegun on a vist to Buhari, who is on medical vacation in London.

    Those on the trip are: Minister of Transportation Rotimi Amaechi, Governors Umaru Tanko Al-Makura (Nasarawa); Nasir El-Rufai (Kaduna); and Yahaya Bello (Kogi)

    Acting President Yemi Osinbajo told the nation that the President is recuperating fast after visiting him on July 11.

    Presidential Spokesman Femi Adesina last night made available the photograph of the London parley.

    He also issued a statement: “In a telephone conversation following the meeting of All Progressives Congress (APC) governors and leaders with President Muhammadu Buhari in London Sunday, Governor Rochas Okorocha of Imo State, said the President was very cheerful and has not lost any bit of his sense of humour.

    “The governor said the party delegation spent more than an hour with President Buhari over lunch, and it was very clear from the discussions that he followed developments at home very closely.

    “He said the President was delighted to receive the delegation and asked each governor about affairs in his state. He also asked the Minister of Transportation, Rotimi Amaechi, about the state of the railways.

    “When asked to react to all the negative things being said about him, the President just laughed, describing such negative reports as lies. Governor Okorocha said President Buhari was completely unperturbed by the cocktail of lies. He, instead, sent his best wishes to Nigerians.

    “According to the governor, Nigerians don’t have to worry at all, adding that President Buhari will be back as soon as the doctors give him the green light.

    “By our visit to London today, the merchants of lies have been put out of business and Nigerians will not buy the garbage they have been selling. All those who look up to fake news can find better use for their time,” Okorocha noted.

  • Leah Abiara lies low

    Leah Abiara lies low

    Not a few people are wondering the whereabouts of Ibadan big girl, Leah Abiara. The youngest daughter of the General Evangelist of the Christ Apostolic Church (CAC) Worldwide, Prophet Samuel Kayode Abiara, has not been visible on the social scene for some time. The development might not be unconnected with the death, late last year, of her loving mother, Prophetess Christianah Aduke Abiara (nee Adasofunjo).

    The sudden demise of the matriarch of the Abiara family shocked everybody, but no one was affected as much as Leah who was known to be very close to her mother in spite of her (Leah’s) reputation as a lady about town, which was said to have distanced her from other family members.

    It will be recalled that Leah was a hot item whose daring exploits made the front pages of gossip tabloids in the ancient city of Ibadan. But since she tied the nuptial knot with Nero a few years back, she has been much quieter. She and her husband are said to have relocated to the US where they are living their lives in peace.

  • Bamaiyi’s lies: In defence of Osinbajo and Justice Ade Alabi

    Savouring his court-ordered freedom after spending about eight years at Kirikiri prison, Lagos for alleged complicity in the attempted assassination of Alex Ibru, then publisher of Guardian newspaper, a former Chief of Army Staff, Lt- General Ishaya Bamaiyi, has come out with his book.

    The book, titled “Vindication of a General” ought to have been aptly titled “Lies of a General”.

    The book, which purports to be his own story, detailing his travails during his trial, is unfortunately riddled with falsehood and gross misrepresentation of facts as far as the incident regarding his false allegation against the first presiding judge, Ade Alabi was concerned.

    Bamaiyi was charged along with Major Hamza, Al-Mustapha, former Lagos police Commissioner, James Danbaba, CSP Rabo Lawal and Col. Baba Yakubu, over the attempted murder of Mr Ibru.

    As the trial got underway, the defendants tried all tricks in the book to delay and scuttle their trial and one of the strategies was to accuse the presiding Judge, who incidentally was the Chief Judge of Lagos State, Justice Ade Alabi, of demanding a bribe of $10 million (not N10 million as stated by Bamaiyi in his book), to enable him grant bail to the defendants.

    First, the defendants made the allegation in the open court, ostensibly to annoy the judge and eventually to get the case transfered to another judge who would then start the case de novo.

    The case was being prosecuted by the Lagos State Attorney-General and Commissioner for Justice, Prof. Yemi Osinbajo, who was ostensibly incensed over this spurious allegation.

    The defendants, thereafter petitioned the National Judicial Council (NJC) which investigated the allegation and exculpated the judge, having found that the allegation was spurious and baseless.

    To underline his ignorance, Bamaiyi, in trying to pooh-pooh the NJC’s investigation, claimed in his book that the judge “refused to enter the dock” during the investigation. If the retired General had availed knowledgeable people, versed in law the privilege of going through his poorly written manuscript, they would have told him that NJC administrative panel is not a criminal court where a defendant facing criminal charges enters the dock. They would also have advised him against the defamatory statements he made in the book concerning the judge and Osinbajo.

    According to Bamaiyi, “Specifically, that prof. Osinbajo brought what he said was the panel report during one of the motions. Unfortunately, pages one through to twenty-nine of the report were not produced”. He went on to allege that the NJC protected the judge, while he similarly alleged that Osinbajo and the presiding judge were invited to Abuja and directed to convict the defendants within six months. He went on with his cocktail of lies of how the judge allegedly demanded a bribe of N10 million.

    As someone who was a witness during the trial and conversant with the facts, l say without any equivocation that nothing could have been farther from the truth.

    Bamaiyi should have known the additional steps taken by his lawyer, Mike Okoye during the trial, in repeating this allegation of bribery and how he recanted and apologised to the judge.

    Mike Okoye had addressed a press conference, where he repeated the allegation of Bamaiyi but in his own case, he alleged it was $10million and not N10 million as stated by Bamaiyi. These spurious allegations were published by the press and Mr Okoye was subsequently charged to court for criminal contempt.

    He was charged before Justice Bode Rhodes-Vivour (now Justice of the Supreme court).

    In court, Okoye recanted and apologised to the judge.

    Below is the full text of the ruling by Justice Bode Rhodes- Vivour in the Mike Okoye Contempt case.

    In the High Court of Lagos state

    Holden in the General Division, Lagos

    On Friday 8th Day of March, 2002

    Before the Hon. Justice Bode Rhodes-Vivour

    Suit No.LCD/9/2002

    Between The State

    And

    Mike Okoye

     

    RULING

    Mr. Mike Okoye, a legal practitioner was charged on an information with the following offences:-

    Count 1

    Statement of Offence

    Contempt of Court Contrary to section 133 (4) of the

    Criminal Code Cap 32 Vol.2 Laws of Lagos State 1994.

    Particulars of Offence

    Mike Okoye (M) on or about the first day of January 2002 at Lagos in the Lagos Judicial Division did cause the scandalizing of the court with utterances and statements spoken and made in news item  of “THISDAY” Newpaper of 7/1/2002 and concerning the Honourable Mr Justice A. Ade Alabi in the public capacity, to wit, qua the presiding trial judge seized  of the conduct of charge No. LCD/108/99: The State vs. Lt. Gen. R. Ishaya  Bamaiyi and 4 others.

    Count 2

    Statement of offence

    Contempt of court contrary to section133 (4) of the Criminal Code Cap 32 Vol. 2 Laws of Lagos State 1994.             Particular of Offence:

    Mike Okoye (M) on or about the 4th  day of     January 2002 at Lagos state in the Lagos Judicial Division, did cause the scandalizing of the court with utterances and statements spoken, published and made in a news item on the back page of  Daily Times newspaper of 7/1/2002 and concerning the Honorable Mr. Justice A. Alabi  in his public capacity to wit, qua the presiding trial Judge seized of the conduct of the charge number LCD/108/99: The State vs Lt. Gen R. Ishaya Bamaiyi and 4 others.

    He pleaded not guilty to both counts , and immediately proceeded to read out a prepared text to the court. The operative part reads thus:

    “I apologize to the Bench and the Hon. Justice Ade Alabi for any injury he may have suffered from his unwarranted and unnecessary publications. I am aware that the publication has the effect of bringing to disrepute, office, integrity and position of Hon. Justice Alabi but l would want to disabuse the minds of the public of this impression and state that these allegations of corruption leveled against Hon. Justice Ade Alabi are not true to the best of my knowledge”.

    Thereafter, the Lagos State Solicitor General applied to withdraw the charge on behalf of the Hon. Attorney General and the Commissioner of Justice. This is what he had to say:”I wish the  court understands the attitude of Office of the Attorney-General to prosecute or otherwise. Because Mr. Okoye has apologized and because more fundamentally, he has admitted that the allegations are not true, it is our view that the mischief/damage which this proceedings were filed to correct, to wit: maintenance of the institution and it’s officers,  I would, considering the plea of the accused person, be willing on behalf of the Attorney-General to withdraw the charge.”

    After listening to

    1. Mr. Femi Falana,  counsel for Mr. Mike Okoye
    2. Mr T.E.Williams representing Chief F.R.A Williams
    3. Mr Dabiri, Chairman, Nigeria Bar Association, Lagos Branch
    4. Mr. L.Yusuf, Chairman, Nigerian Bar Association, Ikeja Branch

    5.Mr O.O. Salu, representing  Mrs. Ayo Obe of the Civil Liberties Orgnisation.

    I adjourned this suit till today. I adjourned for a ruling and not to seek appropriate directives as reported in the Guardian Newspaper of 2/3/2002. See proceedings of 1/3/2002.

    It is about time that when a reporter is not clear as to what a judge said, he would do well to seek an explanation from  the registrar  of court, rather than credit the judge with what was never said.

    The Honorable Justice Ade Alabi is the trial judge in suit  No.LCD/108/99.  The accused persons are Lt. General Bamaiyi, the former Chief of Army Staff, Major H. Al- Mustapha, Chief Security Officer to the former military

    Head of state,  Rabo lawal, a Chief Superintendent of police, Mr  James Danbaba,  a one time Lagos  Commissioner of police and Col. T. Baba Yakubu, ex-administrator  of Zamfara State. They are charged with attempting to kill the Guardian Publisher, Mr. Alex Ibru.

    During the trial, which is still in progress, Major Al-Mustapha accused the trial judge of demanding bribes from him. Mr. Mike Okoye who at the time represented one of the accused persons, held a press conference and told newsmen that he could prove the trial judge demanded for $10 million from the accused person. The Daily Times and THISDAY Newspapers of Monday 7th day of January 2002, gave wide coverage to Mr. Okoye’s wild, unguarded and unfounded statements which to me, amount to the most despicable assault on the Bench. Mr. Mike Okoye’s conduct constitutes an intolerable attack on the Bench and the well being of society. A crime of monumental proportions. Such dare devilry must be checked, otherwise the foundations of the judiciary may very well crumble.

    The Honourable Attorney-General quickly rose to the occasion, filing this information.

    One can imagine the days, weeks of grinding hell, an awful strain these unguarded and untrue accusations caused his Lordship , a judge  no doubt with transparent integrity and manifest probity, whose tireless energy and unquenchable enthusiasm are too clear for all to see.

    Okoye said openly in court that his statement with the press are not true. The need to proceed with a trial with be pointless since the statement fundamentally addresses the issue and the trial will not do the same.

    It is not the practice of courts to question the Attorney-General when he decides to withdraw a charge . He can not be questioned by anyone and owes no one an explanation for prosecuting or deciding against prosecution.It is clear that the offensive publications were given very wide coverage by the press and other electronic devices.

    Petitions were addressed to the Executive, Legislative, and Judiciary, accusing the highly respected Jurist of taking bribes. It becomes imperative that a retraction is given similar wide publication.

    1. Mr Okoye shall cause to be published, the entire statement he made to this  court on 1/3/2002 in the following Newspapers:

    (a)    The Daily Times

    (b)    THISDAY

    (c)    The punch

    (d)    The Guardian and

    (e)    THE Tribune

    1.   This ruling and the proceedings in the suit shall be forwarded to

    (a)The  Body of Benchers

    (b)The Privileges  Committee and the

    (c)And the Disciplinary Committee of the Bar.

    1. The matter would be further adjourned to Friday, the 15th day of March  2002,  for compliance.
    2. Rhodes-Vivour

    Judge

    8/3/ 2002

    Appearance

    Mrs. B.B. Ayodele,  T.K. Shitta-Bey with her for Lagos state;

    O.Okorojie, I. Okoli, L. Okoroafor, A. Ebohon with him holding F. Falana’s

    Brief for the accused person;

    T.E. Williams, M. Giwa Amu with him for Chief F.R.A.

    Williams SAN as friend of the court

    Bode Kowe holds brief of L. Yusuf, friend of the court.

    B.Rhodes-Vivour. J

    Based on this ruling, it would amount to sheer mischief for General Bamaiyi to make such defamatory statements against Hon. Justice Ade Alabi and Prof. Osinbajo on the so-called bribery.

    Instead of belching out despicable lies against innocent people, Bamaiyi should rather use this time of respite for sober reflection on the controversial roles he played during the General Sani Abacha junta.

    More importantly, it would also be interesting for the former Chief of Army Staff to explain how he came about the $4.8million dollars that was swindled off him while in Kirikiri prison, Lagos, for which Fred Ajudua is currently standing trial.

    Ajudua, has been charged to an Ikeja High court by the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) for allegedly defrauding Bamaiyi of $4.8 million, having approached the former Army Chief while at Kirikiri prison that he could help him secure his freedom.

    Already, a court registrar, Ronke Rosulu, an alleged accomplice of Ajudua in the fraud saga, is currently serving a 10 – year imprisonment, having been convicted by Justice Lateef Lawal -Akapo over her role in the fraud saga.

    It may be necessary for the EFCC to ask Bamaiyi to come and explain how he came about such amount of money, even during his incarceration.

    • Akinnola is the Director, Media Law Centre
  • Eight ways to deal with lies

    Eight ways to deal with lies

    People lie for different reasons and it hurts more when someone you love and trust lies to you. Jumia Travel, the leading online travel agency, shares 8 ways to help you deal with lies and temper its effect on your emotions and perceptions.

    Recognize That You Are Being Lied To

    Before proceeding to deal with lies, you must first establish that you are being lied to. When you are sure, beyond any doubt, that you have been or are being lied to, you can then proceed to deal with it.

    Look for Patterns In The Person’s Lies

    This is done in an attempt to understand why the person is lying to you. It is easier to deal with when you can identify why the person is lying to you. However, if after some analysis it seems to you that the person is lying for no reason, then there is a bigger problem at hand – you are possibly dealing with a compulsive or pathological liar. If you are not careful, the person’s lies can distort your reality to the point where you actually begin to believe the lies might be true.

    Determine if the Person’s Lies Are Harmful

    Truth is there is no such thing as a harmless lie, but some lies are more harmful than others. You need to figure out how the lies affect you, the person lying and others that might be involved. Is the person lying to protect, escape the consequence of an error, or manipulate? More importantly, are the lies manipulating you into making decisions or acting in ways that are unlike you or your personality?

    Decide Whether or Not to Confront the Liar

    This is a personal choice. After you are sure, beyond reasonable doubt, that you have been lied to, you need to sit down, think and decide on your course of action. Determine the better alternative between confronting the liar and keeping to yourself the fact that you know the truth. You can keep it to yourself to inform your future decisions concerning the liar and anything that has to do with the liar.

    Document the Lies

    This seems funny but if you neglect this you can be made the fool, especially when you confront the liar for his/her lies. You don’t have to show the documentation to anyone, it is mainly for you so you don’t lose sight of the truth. You should document the instance of the lie and why you believe it is a lie. Do some research (an objective one) to get some evidence proving the lie, you should be able to show the liar (and to some degree even yourself), without a doubt, that a lie or lies have been told.

    Talk to the Person Privately

    If you must confront the liar, don’t do so in public. That tends to have a less than desired effect and isn’t likely to help the person change. When you talk to the person, don’t be condescending or aggressive, calmly point out the person’s lie(s) with evidence and give them space to react. If the person admits the lie(s), then they are most likely remorseful. You can give the person a chance to explain the lie(s).

    If the person doesn’t admit the lie after being caught with evidence, then there is a deeper problem – you are more likely dealing with a compulsive or pathological liar. You should tread carefully and wisely at this point because they are unlikely to admit the truth no matter how aggressive you get.

    Prepare for Resulting Trust Issues

    After being lied to, prepare for the fact that you are likely going to have difficulty trusting people again because the feeling of betrayal doesn’t fade easily. At this point, it helps to remember that there are still honest people in the world, regardless of how few they might be. Remind yourself that no one deserves to be judged by the mistakes of others – everyone deserves a chance.

    Protect Yourself

    Dealing with lies can be emotionally exhausting. Ensure that you don’t get wrapped up in a person’s lies again. Ensure that at every point you always have a firm grasp on the truth. If things get out of hand and you have to endure mental and psychological trauma because of a person’s lies, it advisable to distance yourself from the liar, and in more extreme cases, cut the person off completely.

     

  • ‘Niger Governor surrounded by people who feed him with lies’

    ‘Niger Governor surrounded by people who feed him with lies’

    The Chairman of Niger state Science and Technical Schools Board, Alhaji Abubakar Katcha has resigned his appointment alleging that “people in the system are not being truthful to themselves.”
    According to him, it is difficult to operate under darkness and frustration adding that all his efforts to reposition the board is being sabotaged.
    Katcha said that the Governor, Alhaji Abubakar Sani Bello has good intention for the board, but he is surrounded by people who always feed him with wrong information and do not wish him or the state well.
    In a letter informing the public of his resignation, he said, “The appointment which was given to me by Mr. Governor on 20th December 2016 was actually in good faith but I resigned on the 7th Febuary, 2017 based on reasons beyond not control.”

    ” When people in the system are not being truthful to themselves, the only solution for any man of integrity after series of efforts to put things right failed, is to resign because it will be difficult to operate under darkness and fraustration, the end will be no success.
    “Mr. Governor has good intention for the board but he is surrounded by people that always feed him with wrong information but do not wish him or the state well, they always pretend to be good people but for their own selfish interest. These people do not want the Governor to succeed.”
    The former Chairman lamented that the cabals around the governor always block honest and truthful persons from getting free access to him.

    “Before my appointment, no access to him on on one and as a Chairman of the Board, no access to him even once. For that reason, I deemed it fit and tendered my resignation to him and not to be a party of what is happening.”
    He appreciated the governor for the opportunity given to him to render his service, but said ” unfortunately, I cannot continue.”

  • Dealing with cheating and lies in relationships

    GOOD morning Harriet, Please, I need your advice. I am in a relationship with a guy. Before I accepted him as my boyfriend, I asked him if he was in any relationship and his answer was no.

    But as time went on, l discovered that he was going out with a certain girl who added me on Facebook and she left the explanation that she decided to include me as her friend when she saw my picture on her fiancé page.

    I was surprised at her statement. I immediately confronted my boyfriend. He admitted that they were dating, but the relationship was not working out. He then pleaded with me to give him time to break up with her.

    I feel angry, jealous and upset. I want to call it off because I really cannot allow my heart to be broken.

    Please, what should I do?

    Thanks

    Ewere, Delta State.

     

    We must commend your courage; it is really not easy to share your experience. I hope that people experiencing the same situation will draw strength from it. Thanks a lot.

    To be in a relationship at the right time with the right person is an amazing feeling that words most times cannot express. Therefore, when the reverse is the case, it can be frustrating, especially when it has to do with cheating and lies.

    Trust and honesty are the crucial foundation upon which all other qualities in a relationship are built. You took the right step by confronting the issue the minute you observed that he was in a relationship with another girl just as if you knew when you asked him the question at the beginning of the relationship.

    It is very good to be open with whoever you want to date; you stand to gain a lot.  Speaking out freely from the start of a relationship gives an easy understanding of the person’s likes and dislikes.

    To be lied to and cheated upon can be very devastating, so what you are feeling now is highly expected because he is your boyfriend that has treated you in such a manner, not a stranger. Of course, you feel betrayed and deceived. Your emotions will be playing up and anger will set in after a while, all these will happen naturally for healing to take place.

    At the moment, learn not to be too hard on yourself, but instead see him as a person that has issues and needs help because a man who finds it difficult to know exactly what he wants and how to go about it tells you that such a person might have challenges in decision making.

    He wants to have his cake and eat it. So the question is, can you put up with such a character and how are you sure that he is telling you the truth of the whole situation. Cheating and lies in a relationship are major signs of an unhealthy relationship and should not be taken for granted.

    If you feel that you cannot cope with your emotions, do not hesitate to seek the help of a counsellor. The way forward is to see your situation as an experience with a lesson, not a time for self-pity, blame or regret, but rather to be happy that it was revealed early enough for you to know the type of person you are in a relationship with.

    Think through your situation and ask yourself honest questions about what you want in a relationship. If you choose to stay with your boyfriend after knowing full well the dangers and problems inherent in his personality, it becomes your problem.

    In continuing such relationship, the following steps to take might be of help. Make sure that you have a conversation with him about the situation of things and its effect on your person and the relationship. Bring to his notice that he will have to work hard to gain back your trust.

    Let him know that you will always cross check whatever he says to you about the other girl in order to be sure. Make your boundaries clear and ask him to define your relationship.

    In case you decide to end it after a proper review, go ahead and follow your heart. Never start out looking for approach in which no one gets hurt. It doesn’t exist. Go into a discussion with him, knowing where you want to end up. Your boyfriend may try all sorts of promises about changing in behaviour.

    Don’t accept it if you are ready to close the chapter and move on with your life. Here are ways to help you move on: The first step is to try and channel your emotion to doing activity or improving yourself in order to think less of the situation. It helps to ease worries.

    Take your time and do not rush into a relationship immediately, so that you don’t go into it simply because you feel there is a gap that you need to fill.  Relationship takes two to make it work, so keep an open mind whenever you are in a relationship. Don’t expect too much, always define your relationship, that is, be specific about what you want and ask your partner what he or she wants from the relationship, so that from the onset, you both know what you are going into.

    Time, they say, heals wound. As the day goes by, you feel better and stronger.  Most people dwell on a situation like this it and shut down. Try to keep a free heart, so that you don’t shut love out because of your bitter encounter. Trust me, true love will definitely find you.

    Take care of yourself and note that any relationship based on lies and deceit is not worth holding on to.

     

    Harriet Ogbobine is a counsellor and a motivational speaker. Send your questions and suggestions to her blog; www.liwh.com.ng, text messages only 08054682598 or bineharriet@gmail.com.  You can follow her on twitter: @bineharrietj and instagram: harrietogbobine

  • Power sector lies

    In the past few months, the electricity distribution companies (DisCos) have been all over the place, trying to justify why they cannot discharge their obligations to customers. It is heartrending that instead of effective service what we are getting from the DisCos are excuses on why they cannot ensure uninterrupted power supply. The coming of the DisCos, we had thought, would end the power crisis, but unfortunately, Nigerians are today cursing the day the sector was privatised.

    The sector was privatised because the public utility running it was inefficient and ineffective. The Power Holding Company of Nigeria (PHCN) like the National Electric Power Authority (NEPA) and Electricity Corporation of Nigeria (ECN) before it was like any other government agency, which was managed to fail. Though set up with tax payers fund, it was not run to make profit but to service the needs of those in power.

    The affluent and the influential were also favoured. All they needed to do when they had no light was to call the power  minister or the PHCN chief executive and pronto their supply will be restored whether or not they are owing. Then, some institutions, corporate bodies and individuals used light without remembering to pay their bills. It was convenient for them not to pay because there was no mechanism to check them. The problem with our power sector was self inflicted. We preferred to run the sector on the basis of man know man and ended up destroying it.

    Power is life; it is the engine of economic development. Without regular power supply, a nation cannot but be at the bottom of the development index. This is why I am pained by the excuses the DisCos are giving for their inability to meet the people’s needs. The promoters of these DisCos are not from the moon; they have been in this country ever since the days of ECN, NEPA and PHCN. They know what we went through in the hands of these public utilities. It is not an experience worth recalling here.

    The DisCos are supposed to wipe away our tears by ensuring regular power supply, but they are compounding our problem. What we are getting from them are cock and bull stories about why they cannot do their jobs. The stories they are telling us are not new. They are the same old stories that we are aware of and which they too must have heard about before investing in the sector. Their investment was a matter of choice. They could have decided not to put their money into the business because of its many challenges. But having decided to invest in it they have no choice than to deliver because we are paying for their services. They are not supplying us light for free. They know what to do to those using light without paying.

    But in punishing those people they should sift the wheat from the chaff. What is the point in disconnecting those not owing along with the debtors? That is the height of injustice and there is nowhere in the world that such a thing will happen, except in our country. Elsewhere, creditor-customers would have sued the DisCos for breach of contract. Why should we not enjoy the service that we are paying for just because some people are owing? The people are tired of hearing them blame  gas pipelines’ vandals for their inadequacies. An advertorial by the Association of Nigerian Electricity Distributors (ANED) says the DisCos should not be blamed for what it calls ‘’lack of electricity’’.

    Reason : vandalism of gas pipelines, according to the ANED, is equal to shortage of gas. Shortage of gas= low generation of electricity. Low generation of electricity= low distribution. ‘’We’’, it concluded, ‘’cannot give what we don’t have’’. Vandalism of pipelines did not start today; it predates the coming of the DisCos on November 1, 2013. So, it is something they knew about before buying into the power sector. Why did they take the risk when they knew that it is an endangered sector? Why did they invest in the business when they knew that vandals and militants can blow up the pipelines at any time under one guise or the other? How did they plan to handle this huge problem before investing in the sector? Or didn’t they consider such a scenario before their huge investment? If they didn’t that says a lot about them as businessmen.  Again, they should stop complaining about being owed. This too did not start today. It started long ago and they must have been aware of it before they acquired PHCN.

    The DisCos are the architects
    of their troubles. They knew
    of the sector’s enormous problems before buying into it with their eyes wide open, but they were more interested on the return on investment (ROI), which they have calculated in their minds’ eye will be in billionfold of whatever they spend. This calculation seems to have backfired and they are taking it out on customers through tariff hike and crazy bills. Many customers are not complaining about the tariff hike, what irks them is that they are not getting value for their money. The people are sick and tired with the way they are being treated by these DisCos. Will the government call them to order before things get out of hand?

     

    Ali: Forever The Greatest

    When the kid from Louisville, Kentucky in the United States (US), hit the world boxing stage in the sixties with his razor sharp tongue, many would have thought that he would soon burn himself out and become history. But he went on to dominate the game for almost 30 years, clinching the world boxing heavyweight title three times. Muhammad Ali captured the world’s imagination like no other boxer in history. He was as fast on his feet as he was with his mouth. It was a delight to watch Ali fight. He fought with his fists and mouth. As he pounded his opponent with his fists, he followed up by taunting him. Many times, he ran into trouble because of his costly remarks, but there was no stopping Ali. ‘’The man who will beat me has not been born’’, he once said. “I am The Greatest”, he also boasted and the world accepted him as such. Ali was master of his trade. His passage last Friday after a 32-year battle with the Parkinson’s disease showed that he was a fighter to the end. The world mourns as the Champ’s funeral rites hold today and tomorrow in Louisville. Adieu, The Greatest.