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Tag: manage

  • How I manage my horny feeling, by female rapper

    Nigerian rapper, Eva Alordiah, has revealed she is presently horny. Sharing her experience in a new video, Eva who revealed she has been single for a year told of how she was horny while in Accra, Ghana recently while she also endeared her fans to channel their sexual energy into creativity.

    Eva who said she has been single for about a year now recalled how she felt horny throughout the two-week trip to Ghana.

    “I was horny for no reason at all,” she said in the video.

    “I could just be sitting and I would tell my friends, ‘I’m horny ooo.’ Just like that. I could feel the sexual energy was so intense in my body. It was like the strongest horny I have ever been in my life. Every single day, I was horny. And I knew I had to sit back and try to understand why I was so charged. And I had a couple of shows. I had about like three, four shows in Accra. And after the first show, I noticed that if I was horny before, I became extra horny after the show because when I’m performing, I mean, sexual is energy. It’s energy in your body and you can only transform the energy from one form to another. So, I guess what was happening was that I was transforming the sexual energy to performance energy, creative energy when I was performing. And with that the energy was multiplying.

    “By my last show in Accra, I was a mess. I was a totally mess. On stage, I felt so energetic that I had so much energy and I was going and going and going. At the end of the show, when I got to my room that night, I was messed up. I was just like, ‘look, I am horny.’

    She said the sexual desire was intense and it was till 7am the next day before she could sleep. But she confessed she decided to tackle the horniness she was feeling.

    She also talked about not having to suppress anything.

    “Throughout our lives, we haven’t been properly educated about sex. People don’t want to talk about it. When they talk about it, they say ‘this is bad,’ ‘don’t do that,’ ‘you will go to hell fire.’ They don’t really tell us what to do. So, they tell you not to have sex. But they don’t tell you what to do with all that time when biology is taking over you, when energy is taking all over you. So, people are lost

    She therefore talked about how she started moving on couch, following the sexual yearnings of her body and feeling the ‘energy’ in her pelvic region. She said the movement ‘turned her on the max’ and she started having ‘creative ideas.’ she said she then ‘maxed out’ on her sexual energy.

    Though she admits it could be a form of masturbation, the rapper said “all I know I didn’t have to touch myself. I didn’t have to imagine that somebody was touching me. I just had to imagine that the energy was moving through me. So, try this and let me know how this works for you. Let me know if you’re successful in transmitting the energy from sexual energy into creative energy and if you’re actually able to use it. For the most part, I’m still horny. I still have my sexual energy intact and I look forward to doing some more creative visualisation with it in another couple of days.”

  • How to manage your home (1)

    Dear Reader, welcome to another wonderful segment of this month’s teaching series. I established from the Word of God, last week, that the head and the leader of the home is the husband (Ephesians 5:23). He has the God-ordained task and responsibility to take the lead in the management of the home. However, it is important to note that in exercising the mantle of leadership, the man must be a loving leader and not a taskmaster.

    Love is a necessary ingredient for effective leadership. Without it, those who are being led may eventually refuse to follow and choose to go their own ways. Jesus Christ heads the Church with the rod of love. Likewise, every husband will need the same rod of love to get the effective followership of his family members. When a husband demonstrates his love for his wife and children, he will be able to lead his home with ease. The truth is that no one hates to be loved. As a husband, don’t just rejoice at the fact that you are the head of the home; be ready to fulfill the following responsibilities attached. In continuation of the role of the man in the home, you must understand that as the head, leader and man, one of your responsibilities is to:

    Be A Provider In Your Home:

    The husband is designed to be the provider, making provisions available to his household. The Bible says, But if any provide not for his own, and especially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse that an infidel (1 Timothy 5:8). It is not scriptural for the wife to be the chief provider in the home. Just as Christ is the Head of the church and provides for it, even so, every man is expected to make provisions for his home. Don’t sell your birthright to your wife by relegating your God-given responsibility to her. God did not make any mistake by making you the head of the home. He, in His infinite wisdom, already knew the situation of your family before the foundation of the earth. So, if in spite of that foreknowledge, He still chose to make you head and provider, then live up to His expectation. That is why the marriage institution is not for boys but for mature men.

    To be a successful husband, you need to be productive, hardworking, thoughtful and a genuine planner. If you say God will provide, you are right. But He has said it is through you, the man, that He will provide for your family. The age long system of women going to the farm while men sit down and rest is not the Christ-order of leadership. Men need to get to work to be respected at home. When a man stops looking after his household, his life becomes worse than an infidel (one who has no religious beliefs).

    Some men leave home, not concerned whether their family members have eaten or not. This is a violation of covenant obligations, and it is very risky. You must be concerned about your wife and children’s welfare. No man has any right to wear new clothes, when his family is going about in rags. You should set aside some amount of money from whatever you earn, to cater for the personal needs of your wife and children.

    The Bible says: A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children’s children: and the wealth of the sinners is laid up for the just (Proverbs 13:22). Some men shy away from their responsibilities and don’t give their wives home-keeping allowance, under the guise that their wives are working. This is not right! It is not of God. The scriptures say that the man should provide for his own household (1Timothy 5:8). Prayer is not the way to enjoy success in home management; it is by accepting responsibility for your home.

    A great burden is placed on you, as the man, to love your wife as Christ loves the Church, and you are not exempted from this responsibility even if your wife is not submissive. This responsibility can be accomplished only by sacrifices, being a godly example and through an unconditional devotion, commitment and dedication to your family. The Word of God says: Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them (Colossians 3:19); Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.  So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies.  He that loveth his wife loveth himself.  For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church (Ephesians 5:25,28-29).

    Learn how to say, “I am Sorry”:

    Some men find it hard to say, “I am sorry, please forgive me,” because of their ego. But a man that desires his home to be heaven on earth, does not let his ego stand between him and his wife or children. Man, don’t give room to the devil to bring problems to your home. Learn to say “I am sorry” when you offend your wife.  It works! If you do that, eyeball-to-eyeball, you will see her countenance change.

    Compliment your wife:

    As a husband, you need to always compliment your wife about those good qualities in her and that will bring out the best in her. Every human being loves to be praised either for what he has done or simply for who he is.

    No one is perfect. Express your appreciation for those areas that she is good at verbally. Learn to show appreciation for both small and great acts of kindness. You can also show appreciation by giving little gifts. Make room for praise in your home and your relationship will be heaven on earth!

    The first step to take, in order to be the man that God ordained you to be for your family, is to become a bona fide child of God. If you are already born again, rejoice because your case is settled. If you are not yet born again and you desire to do so right now, please pray this prayer with faith in your heart: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. I accept You as my Lord and personal Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for delivering me from sin and satan to serve the living God and thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    Congratulations! If you prayed this simple prayer of faith with me, you are now born again and a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    With this, you are guaranteed all-round rest and peace in Jesus’ Name! Call or write to share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org, 07026385437 OR 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building a Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Why economists can’t manage economies well

    Economists claim to be concerned with promoting rapid growth, full employment and stable prices. Have they been successful in their attempts to achieve their claimed objectives? No! Economists and economics-based institutions cannot manage our economies well because of the inherent debilities of the discipline of economics. And what are the inherent debilities of economics?

    The first inherent debility of economics as an area of knowledge is its methodology. Economics like other social sciences adopted the scientific method developed for the physical and biological sciences, believing that the application of the scientific method to social science would transform economics into social physics that would provide for students of society, the excitement which natural sciences were providing for the students of the physical sciences (DeFleur, et al., 1977). By conceiving social sciences as social physics instead of social biology, social scientists, especially economists, made a fundamental error from the onset. The consequences of the methodological error are many and fundamental too. They should therefore be considered as the fundamental debilities of economists.

    The second defect of economics is that it is ahistorical and mechanistic. That is, economists’ understanding of the economy lacks a sense of history and appropriate logic. The equations (laws) of physics and mechanics adopted by economists are about time-independent responses of solids like metallic rods, springs, wires, etc. By adopting such laws, economists claim that economies behave like iron wires, spring and rods subjected to small strains and that development does not take time to achieve; development is achieved instantaneously. Economists’ theories are always timeless functions. Economists find it hard incorporating historical evidence into their analyses. Economists do not understand that nations grow and become transformed. They think that the development process is like a once-for-all game such as a football match. They pretend not to be aware that European and American cultures were not counted as the Great Medieval Civilizations (GMCs). The Chinese, Indian and Islamic cultures were the GMCs. Economists do not understand the industrialization process.

    The third debility of economics is that it is unable to distinguish between trivial growth and Competence-Building Growth (CBG). Economists measure growth as change in the Gross Domestic Product (GDP) of a nation; that is, the change in the goods and services produced in a nation in a year. Mere computation of GDP and the change in it does not describe the true economic situation in a nation. Nigeria now has   OPEC-quota of about 2.5 million barrels per day of crude petroleum. The exploration and production are done by multi-national companies. Increase in the number of barrels produced and increase in the international price of crude petroleum swell the earnings from sales of crude petroleum and the Nigerian GDP. The increase in GDP this way cannot be a true reflection of the state of Nigeria, because it has nothing to do with Nigerians. This explains why economists measure growth which has no impact on the people – growth without development. Nigerians lack the competence to explore and produce oil and gas. It is through learning that man acquires all competences. So, it is CBG that Nigeria and other African nations should promote and measure, not GDP growth.

    The fourth defect in economics is that it does not know the primary source of CBG and industrialization. Economists who advocate that African nations should provide favourable environment for inflow of foreign investment into their nations to promote growth do not understand what national economic growth entails. Hence they believe that nations get transformed through mere capital investment. However, Douglas (1948), Abramovitz (1956), Solow (1957), Gerschenkron (1966) and Ogbimi (2003), all demonstrated that capital investment is not the primary source of Competence-Building Growth (CBG) and industrialization. Economists who claim that capital investment is the most important factor of production do not know that in the Middle Ages (450-1450), land was the most important resource in England. The lord of the manor owned the land and all those who did not own land were slaves (serfs) who worked for the lord. The claim about the special role of capital in promoting economic growth came during the industrial age, following the claim by Karl Marx (1867) that the capitalist does not begin to produce till he has accumulated enough capital.

    The fifth debility of economics is that it is based on equilibrium or static analysis. This defect is a very serious one. Real growth is a transformation.  Our research activities in Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife, showed clearly that learning is the primary source of CBG. One who has learnt something new is transformed from an undesirable status into a desirable status. One who cannot read and write may learn to read and write and be transformed. So, true growth is a transformational process, not an equilibrium one as economists assume. It was through learning that agricultural/artisan European, American and Asian nations increased their knowledge, skills and competences over 2000-3000 years, achieved industrialization and became transformed.

    The sixth weakness of economics is that it does not understand the relationships among the fundamental variables of an economy, so economists’ reports on growth and inflation rates are always incorrect.  The fundamental variables in an economy are employment, productivity and inflation. The values of the three variables must be reported together to understand the true state of an economy. The results of our research show that the employment level (in quantity and quality), is the independent variable which determines the levels of productivity and inflation (the dependent variables) in an economy. The consequence of this defect in economics is that rather than increase employment so as to increase productivity and reduce inflation, economists pump money into economy and claim they are reflating an economy. Then they borrow unnecessary money (mop up excess liquidity) at high cost to society to reduce inflation.

    The seventh weakness of economics and economists is that they do not understand the production or supply side. So, they are unable to promote production. The eighth debility of economists is that they see employment only as a cost-item. They never consider the benefits those employed bring to the organization or nation. Our research results show that employment is the” blood” of an economy. Unemployment is a national loss. Economists’ lack of understanding of the relationships among employment level and levels of productivity and inflation has been the biggest obstacle to promoting economic growth in Africa during the past five decades. Economists promote retrenchment – rightsizing and downsizing, rather than promote training and employment to link the educational sector and the rest of the economy to channel the knowledge developed in educational institutions into production activities. It is impossible to use the knowledge, skills and competences possessed by an individual or group of people without employing them.

    It is clear that economics cannot serve as the intellectual basis for proper management of any economy. Sadly, economists are never prepared to learn and acquire new knowledge. African nations must adopt more robust planning teams composed of technology management experts, scientists, engineers, psychologists and others who are ready to learn.

     

    • Professor Ogbimi writes from Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife.

  • Govt urged to manage pipelines

    Participants at a workshop organised by the Petroleum Technology Development Fund (PTDF) have urged the government to grow the domestic gas market by managing its pipelines effectively.

    They bemoaned pipelines vandalism by some militant groups in the Niger Delta, saying their actions should be condemned.

    In a communiqué after the event, the participants, which included learning managers of the oil and gas managers and the executives of the Petroleum Training Institute (PTI), noted that pipeline vandalism would destroy and disrupt the industry if urgent steps were not taken to arrest the situation.

    The communique said: ‘’To effectively contain losses due to pipeline vandalism, Nigeria must overcome the toxic and explosive relationship between the government, corporate establishment and their host communities. ‘’

    It added: ‘’The government should hasten the passage of the Petroleum Industry Bill (PIB) to attract the requisite foreign Direct Investment into the oil and gas industry and the steel industry to establish the basic steel infrastructure for easy access to steel products and its auxiliary facilities for effective pipeline management.’’

    Earlier, PTDF’s Acting Executive Secretary, Mr Ahmed Galadima Aminu, said Nigerians should continue to complement the government efforts to towards achieving a viable, sustainable and efficient oil and gas sector by experimenting on new innovative ways that would ensure that the country exploits its enormous gas potential.

    Noting the contributions of PTDF to nation building, he praised PTI for its role as a foremost training institute in the oil and gas sector.

    PTI’s Vice Principal Mrs Emily E. Arhagba said knowledge management is vital to the sector, especially gas pipelines operations.

    She assured that PTI will continue to train the needed manpower in the sector.

  • APC lacks capacity to create, manage wealth, says PDP

    APC lacks capacity to create, manage wealth, says PDP

    The Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) has said that the Muhammadu Buhari led administration lacked the capacity to create and manage wealth.

    The opposition party said it has noted the deliberate resort to “diversionary blackmail” and “overused excuses” by the ruling party to shy away from providing answers to the salient issue of unprecedented damage done to the nation’s economy in its 90 days in office.

    A statement yesterday by PDP’s National Publicity Secretary, Chief Olisa Metuh, said the ruling All Progressives Congress (APC) should hide its head in shame for poor performance in the last 90 days.

    This, the PDP added, that had resulted in the sudden economic retrogression, “the worst ever experienced by the nation”, stressing that the APC and the Presidency had continued to grope and look for excuses.

    The statement read: “Discerning minds were appalled that instead of providing answers to issues of economic retrogression, the Presidency and the APC have resorted to wild allegations and insults to attempt to cover their ineptitude and divert attention from their list of bogus promises which they have no intention to fulfill.

    “The PDP has severally expressed its support for a holistic fight against corruption and we have challenged the Federal Government to investigate and prosecute all corrupt persons irrespective of ethnic and political affiliations. We are therefore appalled that instead of getting serious with the challenges of governance, the APC is bent on inventing excuse for its crass incompetence to create and manage wealth, to the detriment of the nation.

    “We challenge the APC and the Presidency to be honest enough to respond to issues instead of resorting to propaganda. Is the so-called mess clearing an answer for the adamant stance of the APC and President Buhari in running a government without a cabinet and precise fiscal policy direction, a strange totalitarian approach that have taken serious toll on the economy and the polity in general?

    “Is it an answer to the resort to constitutional violations, abuse of financial regulations, halting of development projects and the pervading uncertainty that resulted in the retarding of domestic and foreign direct investments with attendant avoidable losses to Nigerians?

    “What has the APC and the Presidency to say to the official report by the National Bureau of Statistics that while they are busy celebrating imaginary achievements, the economy is running aground with real Gross Domestic Product (GDP) plunging with about 2.35 per cent, with job creation dropping by 69 percent under their watch?

    “Are we not already experiencing the consequences of abuse of rules such as the foisting of foreign exchange transaction restrictions in violation of the the Foreign Exchange Monitoring And Miscellaneous Provisions Act, otherwise known as Decree No. 17 of 1995?”

  • How to manage pneumonia, by expert

    How to manage pneumonia, by expert

    A naturopath, Dr Solomon Abutoh, has recommended bitter (garcina) kola, honey, allium sativa (garlic) and eucalyptus oil for the management of pneumonia.

    According to him, a mixture made from the combination can ensure relief for people who have the ailment.

    He said during rainy season, many health conditions, such as pneumonia usually occur and as such curative measures must be taken.

    Eucalyptus oil, he said, should be dropped in handkerchief and inhaled deeply at intervals by those suffering from the ailment.

    He also said it is important to wear a dust barrier (covering the nose and mouth) when passing or working in a dusty environment.

    Pneumonia, Abutoh described, is a lung inflammation caused by bacteria or viral infection, in which the air sacs are filled with pus and may become solid.

    The ailment, he said, is often wrongly diagnosed as fever because of its symptoms, which are similar to those of fever.

    He spoke of pneumonia as a respiratory disorder, characterised by inflammation of the lungs, leading to consolidation of one or more lobes (alvioli).

    “The lungs are a pair of organ located on either side of the vertebral column but within the rib cage. They are responsible for the effective intake of oxygen and exhalation of carbondioxide. Like the other organs, the lungs can malfunction when exposed to unfavourable environment.

    “Pneumonia is caused by bacteria known as pneumococcal bacteria. There are four stages of pneumonia. They are congestion, red hepatisation, grey hepatisation and resolution,” he said.

    Congestion, he said, is when the alveoli are filled with red blood cells instead of air. Red hepatisation is when the lungs become solid. Grey hepatisation is when the lungs become greyish in colour (as revealed by X- ray). Resolution means there is a higher rate of white blood cells due to resistance to inflammation, depending of course on the immune system of the person so affected,” he said.

    He identified some of the symptoms as cold, rigour (stiffness) pain in the chest, dyspnea (difficulty in breathing) and heightened pulse rate.

    Others are rusty sputum, herpes around the mouth and skin, and weakness.

    “In addition, there is usually a sort of crepitating (cracking sound) when the patient’s breathing is monitored with a stethoscope. This is different from the wheezing sound in asthma patients,” Abutoh said.

    To treat the ailment, the naturopath said, it is important for patient to be kept warm by wearing thick clothes. Also warm bath and drinks are also recommended.

    “Since Pneumonia is a bacterial infection, appropriate anti-baterials must be introduced to allow for proper and efficient exchange of gases, without which there cannot be proper circulation of blood, and hence transportation of nutrients for optimum well being.

    “A lot of bacterial and even fungi thrive or are very active in cold and damp environment. We must endeavour to keep ourselves and environment warm, as this remains the only way to keep these opportunistic diseases at bay.”

  • How to manage low back pain with alternative medicine

    That back pain may not be caused by dysentery after all, but a structural problem that requires expert attention, writes OYEYEMI GBENGA-MUSTAPHA.

    Nigerians have been told to pay more attention to postural positions, as bad postures can lead to illhealth, such as neck pain, low back-pain, upper back and related disorders.

    According to Prof Magnus Atilade, a chiropractor, many Nigerians are experiencing structural problems and do not know. He suggested they try complementary and alternative medicine (CAM).

    According to Atilade, Managing Director (MD), St Luke Chiropractic Clinic, Ekololu, Surulere, Lagos, most people conclude that the pains, especially low back pain, could be caused by dysentery or  pile and,  therefore, resort to taking all manner of preparations, to get rid of the pains and discomfort that come with simple tasks, such as bending, picking things up or even sitting or standing.

    He said structural problems are not given adequate attention as a result of ignorance, because:  “Structural problems are not communicable or non communicable diseases, such as Ebola, HIV/TB, malaria, renal failure, cold, cough, eye problem or cardio vascular disease.

    “Nearly everyone has low back pain sometime. Men and women are equally affected. It occurs most often between ages 30 and 50, due in part to the ageing process but also as a result of sedentary life styles with too little (sometimes punctuated by too much) exercise. The risk of experiencing low back pain from disc disease or spinal degeneration increases with age. Low back pain unrelated to injury or other known cause is unusual in pre-teen children. However, a backpack overloaded with schoolbooks and supplies can quickly strain the back and cause muscle fatigue.”

    Atilade added: “But because of lack of knowledge, people develop and live with musculoskeletal pains, slip disc, arthritis, low back pains, and misalignment in their spinal column with attendant pains. A chiropractic adjustment can be of tremendous benefit to sufferers. People can tap into CAM, such as Chiropractic, which is based on the scientific fact that your body is a self-regulating, self-healing organism. Chiropractic is the science of locating offending spinal structures, the art of reducing their impact to the nervous system, and the philosophy of all things natural. The brain, spinal cord, and all the nerves of the body control these important functions. Chiropractic techniques were invented in the 19th century by Daniel David Palmer.”

    He said though there are no national data to support incidences of low back pain in the country, it is the commonest cause of job-related disability and a leading contributor to missed work.

    Atilade said: “Back pain is the second most common neurological ailment in the United States (where I trained) only headache is more common. Fortunately, most occurrences of low back pain go away within a few days. Others take much longer to resolve or lead to more serious conditions. Acute or short-term low back pain generally lasts from a few days to a few weeks. Most acute back pain is mechanical in nature — the result of trauma to the lower back or a disorder such as arthritis. Pain from trauma may be caused by a sports injury, work around the house or in the garden, or a sudden jolt such as a car accident or other stress on spinal bones and tissues. Symptoms may range from muscle ache to shooting or stabbing pain, limited flexibility and or range of motion, or an inability to stand straight.  Chronic back pain is measured by duration, i.e, pain that persists for more than three months is considered chronic. It is often progressive and the cause can be difficult to determine.”

    Describing the structure of the spine and how low back pain occurs, Prof Atilade said, “Starting at the top, the spine has four regions: the seven cervical or neck vertebrae (labeled C1 – C7); the 12 thoracic or upper back vertebrae (labeled T1 – T12); the five lumbar vertebrae (labeled L1 – L5), which we know as the lower back, and the sacrum and coccyx, a group of bones fused together at the base of the spine. The lumbar region of the back, where most back pain is felt, supports the weight of the upper body.

     Causes

    According to Prof Atilade, bone strength and muscle elasticity and tone tend to decrease as people age  The discs begin to lose fluid and flexibility, which decreases their ability to cushion the vertebrae. Pain can occur when, for example, someone lifts something too heavy or overstretches, causing a sprain, strain, or spasm in one of the muscles or ligaments in the back. If the spine becomes overly strained or compressed, a disc may rupture or bulge outward. This rupture may put pressure on one of the more than 50 nerves rooted to the spinal cord that control body movements and transmit signals from the body to the brain. When these nerve roots become compressed or irritated, back pain results.

    He said: “Low back pain may reflect nerve or muscle irritation or bone lesions. Most low back pain follows injury or trauma to the back, but pain may also be caused by degenerative conditions such as arthritis or disc disease, osteoporosis or other bone diseases, viral infections, irritation to joints and discs, or congenital abnormalities in the spine. Obesity, smoking, weight gain during pregnancy, stress, poor physical condition, posture inappropriate for the activity being performed, and poor sleeping position also may contribute to low back pain. Additionally, scar tissue created when the injured back heals itself does not have the strength or flexibility of normal tissue. Buildup of scar tissue from repeated injuries eventually weakens the back and can lead to more serious injury. Occasionally, low back pain may indicate a more serious medical problem. Pain accompanied by fever or loss of bowel or bladder control, pain when coughing, and progressive weakness in the legs may indicate a pinched nerve or other serious condition. People with diabetes may have severe back pain or pain radiating down the leg related to neuropathy. People with these symptoms should contact a doctor immediately to help prevent permanent damage.”

    Atilade said: “Chiropractors are trained to use a technique called spinal  manipulation to relieve low-back pain and improve physical function (the ability to walk and move). Spinal manipulation is one of several options—including exercise,  massage, and physical therapy that can provide mild-to-moderate relief from low-back pain. Spinal manipulation work as well as conventional treatments, such as applying heat, using a firm mattress, and taking pain-relieving  medications. Spinal manipulation is a generally safe treatment for low-back pain when performed by a trained and licensed practitioner.

  • How to Manage Difficult Conversations (2)

    Welcome to the month of September. I pray that the month will deliver to you your great expectations and desires for the year 2014. If you have achieved the goals you set at the beginning of the year, congratulations, but don’t stop trying to do more. If you have not done too well, you should review your written goals and commit to them. If you have not done anything about the goals you wrote in January, or you didn’t even write any, don’t be discouraged, a lot can still be achieved in four months. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. said, “if you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward”. Perhaps you don’t think you are making as much progress as you would have wanted but the question is, “are you still where you were in January?” If the answer is no, then you have something to be grateful for. Just make sure you keep moving.

    Last week, we discussed about having difficult conversations. When conversations are over-charged with emotions, they mostly become difficult to manage. Sometimes you dread having some discussions and you wish you can avoid them. However, avoiding difficult but necessary conversations can be misleading, unfair, affect other people’s productivity and efficiency, and it can also kill morale. If we hate to have difficult conversations, yet we must have them, how then can we make them less awkward and more effective? Here are a few suggestions:

    • Prepare yourself psychologically: we cannot overemphasize the need for you to be confident when having this kind of conversation. You need to prepare your mind ahead. It is very important for you to take charge of the conversation otherwise you will find yourself on the defensive. Even if you are about to confess that you made an error or you are answering for a poor business decision, you should be in control. One of the major ways to do this is to state that you are aware of your error, claim responsibility and explain what you are already doing or hope to do to remedy the problem. What you have done is to play the judge in your own case, which most people won’t do. However, this works better if you come clean before your error is discovered or if you have not spent all the time defending your action until you realise that there is no escape route.

    • Don’t make it personal: this is particularly important if you are performing an official assignment. Do you remember our little story from last week’s article? Mr. Charles had to break the news of termination of employment to Mr. Smart, who was a company driver in his late 50s, with an ailing wife and nine children. There are two extremes to breaking the news: one person may do so without any consideration at all, after all, it is another person’s job that is being lost, while another individual may have too much sympathy. The best approach is to find a balanced position. While you must deliver the message because you have been instructed to, you can still show that you care. Nevertheless, you must detach your emotion from the conversation so that you don’t take on unnecessary emotional burden. See your office (i.e. Chief Personnel Officer) as the one to deliver the message and not your person (Mr. Charles); that way, you will separate your personal emotion from your job responsibilities.

    • Drop hints: one thing you should try to avoid when having a difficult conversation is sudden outpouring of emotions. When you break unpleasant news suddenly, that is exactly what you will get. So, attempt to drop hints so that the other party can start to figure out the direction of the conversation before you conclude. You can do so by asking subtle questions that can lead to your conclusion. As the individual responds to the questions, he or she will also be trying to think ahead of the discussing. That will at least make the realization gradual. You may also send a message (i.e. email, SMS) with a subtle suggestion of what the discussion will be about. The main aim is to avoid sudden reactions.

    • Don’t prevent reactions: while it is a good idea to avoid sudden outpouring of emotions, we cannot prevent the expression of emotions altogether. When it is sudden, it tends to be excessive, but there is no way a difficult conversation will not be emotional. Never attempt to prevent the other person from speaking or expressing his/her emotions. While that is exactly what you were dreading in the first place, it is still safer that those emotions are expressed rather than bottled in. What you should do is that after you have stated your point, wait patiently until the other person has finished venting his/her anger. If you don’t interrupt, perhaps he/she will soon become exhausted and calm down for you to give further explanation. When the conversation involves your personal relationship with people, it is advisable that you try to rebuild the relationship if you can. Consequently, wait for a while for the emotions to calm, and then go for a follow-up conversation.

    Since every conversation is unique in itself, you may have better ideas of how to deal with difficult conversation. Please send me a message so that we can also explore your ideas and learn from them. Have a great weekend.

  • Why we must manage our time

    Why we must manage our time

    Imagine this scenario: there is a bank that credits your account each morning with $90,000. It carries over no balance from one day to another. After the close of work each day, the bank clears your account of the remaining money; the next day, it credits your account with fresh cash. What would you do? You would withdraw every kobo, of course.

    Each of us has such a bank. Its name is called “time”. Every morning, it credits us with 86,400 seconds. Every night, it writes off as a loss whatever seconds we have failed to invest on good purpose. It carries over no balance to the next day. It allows no overdraft either.

    Each day opens a new account for us. Each night burns seconds we did not spend judiciously during the day. If one fails to use the day’s deposits properly, loss awaits him. There is no withdrawing of yesterday’s ‘cash’ for tomorrow’s use. One must live on the present deposit.

    We must endeavour to invest in future so that we can retire in good health, happiness and success. The clock is running. Time management is important because of the shortness of our lives. Our earthly sojourn is significantly shorter than we are wont to think. As it is stated in Psalm, 39 and verses 4-5: “You have made my days a mere handbreadth; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Each man’s life is but a breath.”

    More than 300 years ago, François Fénelon, a clergy in the 17th century, understood how valuable time could be. He wrote: “Time is precious, but we do not know yet how precious it really is. We will only know when we are no longer able to take advantage of it. Liberal and generous in every way, God in the wise economy of his providence teaches us how we should be prudent about the proper use of time. He never gives us two moments at the same time. He never gives us a second moment without taking away the first. And he never grants us that second moment without holding the third one in his hand, leaving us completely uncertain as to whether we will have it.”

    The great saints of old learned the wisdom of having only two days on their calendars: today and that day – the day they would be with the Lord. If we want a heart of wisdom, we must learn to live each day in light of that day. When we daily remind ourselves of our purpose on earth, we will cultivate an eternal habit of managing our time; and it will influence our work and all our relationships with others.

    Apostle James echoe this in James 4:14 when he said: “You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” Indeed, our time on earth is registered on the radar screen of life. To live as God would have us to live, it is essential that we make the best use of our time.

    Prophet Moses prayed: “Teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” A good way to gain wisdom is to learn to live each day with an eternal perspective. Our Creator has set eternity in our hearts (Ecclesiastes 3:11). Knowing that we will have to give an account to the One who gave us time should motivate us to use it well. Clive Staples Lewis, a novelist, academic and Christian apologist from Belfast, Northern Ireland, who is best known both for his fictional work, especially The Screwtape Letters, said: “If you read history you will find that the Christians who did the most for the present world were just those who thought most of the next.”

    Paul the Apostles’ letter to the Ephesians cautioned the saints: “Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:15-16). Living wisely involves using our time carefully. Knowing that the harvest is great and the workers are few, and that time is rapidly dwindling should help us make better use of our time.

    There is no doubt that the responsibilities and pressures of this world scream for our attention. The myriad of things pulling us in different directions makes it all too easy for our time to get swallowed up on mundane matters. Those endeavours, which have eternal value then, often get relegated to the back burner. To avoid losing focus, we need to prioritise and set goals. More so, to whatever extent possible, we need to delegate.

    Regarding our work ethics, we need to recall that God did all of His work in six days and rested on the seventh. This tells us that our Creator’s expectations relative to our own work ethics. Indeed, Proverbs 6:10-11 reveal the Lord’s disdain for slothful behavior: “A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest – and poverty will come on you like a bandit.”

    We need to place our focus on that which is eternal as opposed to the fleeting pleasures of this passing world. Accordingly, we should move forward with diligence and divine purpose as the courses of our lives progress toward God’s ultimate goal. We are to accomplish as much as we can with the time God has given us. We will be eternally rewarded for investing our time in good works (1 Corinthians 3:14). We should live as if each minute counts – because it really does.

     

    •Segun, 200-Level Public Administration, LASU

  • Goldman Sachs, others to manage Sovereign Wealth Fund

    Goldman Sachs, others to manage Sovereign Wealth Fund

    The Nigeria Sovereign Investment Authority (NSIA) has appointed Goldman Sachs, Credit Suisse and UBS as asset managers for its Stabilisation Fund.

    A statement from the NSIA quoted Mr. Uche Orji, Managing Director and Chief Executive Officer of the Authority, as stating that “UBS was selected to manage the US Treasury Bond portfolio and that Goldman Sachs and Credit Suisse were selected to manage the investment grade US corporate bond portfolio.”

    The initial Benchmark is a blend of 25 per cent Barclays 1-3 year US Treasury Bonds and 75 per cent Barclays 1-3 year US Corporate Bond Index.

    The Stabilisation Fund, the statement noted, is intended to act as a buffer against short-term macro- economic instability. As such, “the Fund’s assets will be invested conservatively, with capital preservation in nominal terms being of primary importance.”

    Given the short- term nature of the Fund’s potential liabilities, the Fund, the NSIA said, is restricted to investing in investment grade sovereign and corporate fixed income assets.

    Orji said the selection of the three foreign banks “follows a comprehensive process of review and evaluation of world class candidates for this mandate”.

    The appointment of three leading global investment banks he added was to assist with the management of the Stabilization Fund – “drawing on the particular expertise of each to match our investment management requirements.”

    The three investment banks he said “will help us achieve the economic policy objectives set for NSIA and attain the highest standards of financial stewardship to which NSIA aspires.”