Tag: orgasm

You’re doing a wonderful job with your page. May your wisdom not go stale soon. I wrote in during the week on above. You did acknowledge receipt but it wasn’t treated. Want to repeat in a way you could help with a response – A vaginal spasms that expels the penis – orgasm or vaginismus? Any help?

Vaginismus is when the muscle walls of a woman’s vagina contract or spasm in response to attempted insertion, for example, with a tampon or penis. This involuntary muscle contraction can be mildly uncomfortable or it may cause searing or tearing pain.

Vaginismus can interfere with normal activities like sex or getting a pelvic exam at the doctor’s office.

Symptoms of Vaginismus: Painful sex is often the first sign that a woman has vaginismus. The pain occurs only with penetration. It usually, but not always, goes away after withdrawal.

Women have described the pain as feeling too small for a man’s penis. The pain has also been described as a tearing sensation or a feeling like the man is “hitting a wall.”

Many women who have vaginismus also experience discomfort when inserting tampons and during a doctor’s internal exam. Other medical problems like infections can also cause painful intercourse. So it’s important to see a doctor to determine the underlying cause of pain during sex.

Causes of Vaginismus – The causes of vaginismus aren’t fully understood. The condition is considered a sexual dysfunction. It is usually associated with anxiety and fear about having sex. But it’s unclear whether the anxiety is a cause or a consequence of the condition.

Vaginismus is sometimes associated with a history of sexual abuse. Vaginismus can be primary, meaning it’s something a person has had their whole life. Or it can be secondary, occurring after a period of normal function.

Vaginismus may be called “global,” meaning it occurs in all situations with any object. Or it may be “situational.” That means it happens with one partner but not others — or only with sexual intercourse but not with tampons or exams.

The condition usually begins after the first attempt at having intercourse. It may also develop after periods of stress. The vaginal walls may tighten automatically when sex is painful for any reason, compounding the difficulty.

Treatment of Vaginismus

Treatment of vaginismus involves “progressive desensitization” exercises. These exercises help women learn to control and relax the pelvic floor muscles around the vagina.

The exercises can be done at home. When practiced regularly they typically take effect over a period of weeks to months.

To try progressive desensitization, first practice basic Kegel exercises. Kegel exercises involve squeezing the same muscles you use to stop the flow of urine when urinating.

To do a Kegel exercise, take these steps: contract the muscles, hold for two seconds, then relax. Do about 20 contractions at a time. You can do them as many times a day as you think to do them. After a few days, do the exercises with a finger inside the vagina. It’s a good idea to clip your fingernails and use a lubricating jelly. Or do the exercises in a bathtub, where water can be a natural lubricant. Your finger needs to be inserted five or six centimeters.

That’s up to about the first knuckle joint. Start with one finger and work your way up to three. Fingers are preferred because they allow you to feel the muscles contracting. They are also easy to remove if you start to feel any discomfort. Women with vaginismus may also benefit from therapy to ease fear and anxiety about sex or sexual functioning.

You may think you’re King of the Sheets and you’re making her sing hallelujah when not in church, but the reality is that most women have faked an orgasm at some point in their lives, and most men have bought it.

You have a right to know when what you’re witnessing is a performance rather than the real deal. If she’s falsifying ecstasy, she’s doing both you and herself a disservice. How will you know you need to fix it if you don’t realize it’s broken? Luckily, we’ve got your back. To make sure you’re aware of your talents or lacking talents we’ve put together wildly useful hints to let you know if the odds are ever in your favor.

It has been estimated by various studies that 70% of women fake orgasms at some point in their sexual lives. Some fake orgasms very regularly – as in every time – while others only fake it some of the time. The psychology behind faking orgasms is simple: She isn’t going to have an orgasm this time, and she knows it. She can’t be bothered with a) you trying hard to satisfy her and prolonging the encounter, and b) you feeling bad because you couldn’t satisfy her come hell or high water. If you want to know if you are being duped, use the following signs that she really is having an orgasm to distinguish the faux from the bona fide, and catch her in the act.

Retraction of the clitoral head:

This occurs just before orgasm and provides you with a clitoris-sized hint. When the clit disappears, you’re on the right track, so don’t stop. This coveted disappearance of the clitoris isn’t only visible if you have the lights on and your face all up in it; it’s something you can feel as well. So, get yourselves into a position where you can easily rub her clitoris during sex, and use it to your advantage. Under the guise of giving her some extra special treatment, you can feel whether she’s actually close to climaxing or just faking.

Increased breathing and heart rate:

Listen to the sound of her breathing in your ear: When it starts to get heavier, you’ll know you’re onto something. The change will occur reasonably swiftly when she is about to orgasm, and will be accompanied by a completely unconscious change in the tension, rhythm and pace of her other body movements. Liars and the truthful alike might clutch at you and moan and groan, but her breathing is the missing link. Her thumping heart will also be a sign that it’s for real; if she isn’t actually excited, her heart rate and bodily manner will be very ordinary.

Dilated pupils:

Dilated pupils are another surefire sign that your girl is reaching her peak. This might be hard to tell in the dark, but if the lights are on, all you have to do is ask her to look into your eyes as she climaxes. Chances are she’ll be more than willing to oblige to that romantic request. Just make sure to make note of what her pupils looked like at the beginning of your romp so you can compare their difference in size at the end.

Bottom of Form

Red lips:

This means both sets: Her mouth lips will go a little redder (lips swell and redden upon arousal), as will her vaginal lips. While you are penetrating one set of lips, try to feel the swelling in the other set of lips that you’re kissing. Be careful though: Kissing will also increase the redness of her lips, so be gentle with pecks so that you can get an accurate reading of her response level.

Vaginal muscle spasms:

Muscle spasms are the biggest indicators of all because she cannot fake or hide this. During orgasm, she will have between 3 and 10 vaginal and cervical contractions, the first few being the strongest. They will grip your penis, and the tightening feeling you experience will be impossible to ignore.

Sudden perspiration:

Hot, sweaty sex? Yes, please. Breaking out in a sweat means her body is at a high level of tension and her muscles are working overtime – her breathing, heart rate and blood pressure are all up. So, once you both collapse into a sweaty heap afterward, you’ll know she’s been pleased.

Other important signs

She may arch her back and feet, have uncontrolled twitches in her limbs (during and after orgasm), and have uncontrolled facial expressions (aka her “orgasm face”).

Check her cheeks and neck to see if they are flushed.

Of particular importance is what she does immediately after sex: Does she leap right out of bed and get on with her day? Or does she go to the washroom and lock the door? The chemical effect of an orgasm on the body brings a dazed look to the eyes and she may just want to laze for a few minutes to enjoy it. If she is missing this post-coital bliss, be suspicious.

Her nipples will also harden; it has been estimated that there is a 95% chance that if her nipples aren’t hard, she didn’t orgasm.

Her clitoris gets very sensitive right after orgasm, so if she doesn’t slow down or stop completely after her orgasm, she is probably a faker.

Making coherent sentences far too loudly is also a clue to her (dis)honesty; she shouldn’t really be able to say anything much other than “Oh my God!” if the job is getting done to standard. Anything remotely porn-like is highly suspicious (loud over-exaggerated moaning, etc.) because porn sex is not real sex.