This discussion began two weekends ago .There was a break that was occasioned by circumstances and commitments beyond my control.
Sex related violence in Nigeria has indeed assumed very dangerous dimensions. Usually what is reported is very little compared with the cases that are brushed aside, kept secret or which got reported to law enforcement agencies but were simply allowed to fizzle out . Commonly , the victim continues to suffer the multiple jeopardizes of contracting infections including HIV, Hepatitis B, Stigma, divorce, separation and pregnancy if a woman of reproductive age
Those of us who write are glad to do so purely as a form of service to humanity, hoping that somehow, someone somewhere will read, digest , and understand that when you indulge in some certain acts which are considered dangerous or inimical to other people, you are likely to be consumed by the consequences of your action, one way or the other. Even if your victim appears and looks very healthy ,make no mistake about it , by reason of the unyielding biology of the human body under conditions of sexual violence, you might just be preparing yourself not only for an unnecessary, avoidable and life long battle with HIV/AIDS, but also with equally dangerous and incurable infection ,Hepatitis B. And for women who rape men and other women , the risk of disease transmission is only marginally lower when there is passage of sperm cells ,which is more likely to occur when a young woman is the rapist. The many ills of society that are man made inflict pain and suffering too deep to imagine . Humans come in different forms and indeed our present understanding of medicine began with the study of forms (morphology).
From the general appearance to the cells and tissues and the blood elements that flow in us ,we are made differently. Interestingly, we share sameness of genes (basic units of heredity) with animals including wild animals, hence it remains an uphill task to change patterns of behavior in man that are difficult to differentiate from those found in wild animals . The inner spirit battles to restrain man from destructive tendencies and from given vent to primitive instincts . It is from this understanding that best friends often turn out to be worst enemies, unhealthy rivalries can develop between blood brothers and the family friend you seem to trust religiously may turn out to be the one caught in an inappropriate relationship with a loved one . Differences in the Anatomy of our brain tissues and mind also explain why certain persons, men and women will find pleasure in inflicting unimaginable injuries on others for reasons no other person except they can provide. If I might add, these genetic and acquired differences in us partially also explains why those who are entrusted with care and protection of other human beings do little or nothing to help victims of rape and sexual violence, even when death is involved. The interest of victims seem to matter very little to these individuals . For those who survive attacks of rape(non spousal), no one other than the victim can adequately describe the resultant effects. Perhaps as a result of issues bothering on the circumstances prevailing when the incident occurred, marriages have been broken , intending couples separated and promising young people cut down in a few hours of insane inability to postpone , delay or avoid abnormal the urge for immediate sexual gratification.
In all these, early recognition of unusual sexual behavior patterns is very essential. These could be seen or observed in verbal or non-verbal communication, and at times in written messages, done quietly but with sufficient scrutiny on people around us .
Young people keeping multiple partners often fail to understand that it is risky business and any one person in the group is only a link in a big network of sex enthusiasts , some of them with unmatchable desire to explore what belongs to others.
For reasons of clarifications, let us look at the language commonly used to discuss these issues
Sexual assault.
This means any sexual action, involving the genitals, anus or other body parts performed by one person, on another, without that person’s consent associated with the use of force, threat of force, or inability to give consent
Rape
This the act of forced anal or vulval intromission by a male or female genital organ , object, or body part, without established consent, and with or without ejaculation .
Spousal rape can occur between a husband and wife .This may be defined as forced coitus or sexual acts in a marital relationship without the consent of a partner. This is quite uncommon in African societies. People have asked whether house wives should not be asked to explain why husbands now turn away from them preferring house helps and under aged. In societies where polygamy and polyandry is customary, spousal rape is unheard of .
Date rape
Quite common among young people, occurs when rape involves individual adults out on a date. May be prompted by indecent exposure . Often occurs in association with the use of hard drugs and alcohol; May begin with true intention hidden, until the intended victim is provided with an offer she is unable to reject or finds herself unable to prevent being abused.
Statutory rape
Refers to intercourse with a female or male below a specified age or mental status established to be impaired regardless of whether or not consent was given. This seems to occur very frequently in some parts of the underdeveloped world and the reasons go from arrant bestiality , through fetish obsession to others more sinister