Former Vice-President Dr Alex Ekwueme narrated how he met his wife and how, after 13 years of courtship, he still found her a virgin. That was at the 80th birthday of his wife, Beatrice, which took place last Saturday. CHRIS ORJI reports
Mrs. Beatrice Chigozili Ekwueme, wife of Nigeria’s Second Rep-ublic Vice-President, Dr. Alex Ekwueme, exhibited all the virtues of the feminine gender; a woman, a mother, a grandmother, a sister, an aunt, all rolled into one.
The celebrator is 80 years old but she seems 60. She was even walking briskly as someone in her 50s. She looked radiant, splendid and was all smiles during her 80th birthday celebration in Enugu.
The elaborate ceremony was held at the Golden Royale Multi-purpose Hall after a church service conducted by the Anglican Archbishop of Enugu, Dr. Emmanuel Chukwuma at Cathedral of Good Shepherd.
Interestingly, the choir was conducted by Igwe (Prof.) Laz Ekwueme, brother to the former Vice-President and traditional ruler of Oko, their hometown.
In attendance were former Head of State, General Yakubu Gowon, former Commonwealth Secretary-General Chief Emeka Anyaoku, Deputy Senate President, Senator Ike Ekweremadu, former Minister of Power, Prof. Barth Nnaji; President-General of Ohanaeze Ndigbo, Chief Gary Enwo-Igariwey, former governors of Anambra State, Messrs Chukwuemeka Ezeife, Chris Ngige and Peter Obi.
Former governor of Ebonyi State, Dr. Sam Egwu, National Chairman of the All Progressives Grand Alliance (APGA), Chief Victor Umeh, elder statesman, Chief Emmanuel Iwuanyanwu, Senator Uche Chukwumerije, Dr Kingsley Muoghalu, Igwe Chukwuemeka Ike, Dame Virgy Etiaba, Dr. Ezekiel Izuogu and a host of others were also present.
The occasion was a showcase for the former Dr Ekwueme to share with the world his lifetime with his wife whom he fondly calls B.
Earlier in his homily, Archbishop Chukwuma had poured encomiums on the couple whom he described as most wonderful husband and wife and parents. The clergyman said Beatrice was an epitome of homeliness, chastity as well as a virtuous woman who knows what it takes to be a loyal and faithful wife.
Dr. Ekwueme, who said the journey started in Port Harcourt in 1946 while he was on vacation has this to say of his wife.
“The Port Harcourt sector of my long vacation was shared between staying with my uncle, Mr. Justus A. Ekwueme, (later Chief J.A. Ekwueme III, Igwe Oko) and my aunt, Mrs. Ursula Okeke (nee Ekwueme) whose husband, Mr. Isaiah N. Okeke worked for the Nigeria Railways Corporation.
“I was leaning over the lower half of the horizontally-split front door of my aunt’s house, looking onto the street. I was 13 going to 14 years. I saw a young girl in front of the house opposite, occupied by the Onwunyi family of Ogidi who had three young girls namely Winnie, Ada and Uche. But this particular girl was not one of them; she was probably a friend of theirs. I beckoned on her to “advance and be recognised.” She came forward. She was not shy. She was, in fact, quite confident, certainly more so than many of the other girls in the neighbourhood.
“I found out that she too was on holidays. She was schooling at Methodist Girls’ School, Ovim; a primary boarding school. Her name was Beatrice Nwajagu. Her parents were from Ndiowu, a neighbouring town to Oko, my hometown.
“Her mother and my aunt were good friends. Her father and my uncle-in-law both worked for the railways and were also good friends. Both were very active in the Awka Divisional Union (ADU) Port Harcourt branch. What a happy coincidence! “Why did her parents send her, at great expense, to a boarding school in Ovim for primary education when most of the children in the neighbourhood, including her siblings (both older and younger) were at St. Cyprian’s School less than 10 minutes’ walk away? They must have seen something special about her and that was probably the source of her confidence and sure-footedness.
“We talked for a few minutes during which I introduced myself. I asked her to take the entrance examination to Queen’s College Lagos, which she did eventually and passed. Her father thought that Lagos was too far away and, from all accounts, was not the best place to bring up young girls.
“In any case, since she had also passed the entrance examination to Elelenwa Girls’ School, a few minutes train ride away from Port Harcourt; it was to Elelenwa she was sent to. I was naturally disappointed, but we continued our relationship by correspondence on “Capri blue” writing paper and “Capri blue” envelope.
“In our 13 years of “courtship” (1946 to 1959), if it may be so called, we did only a little better than Francis and Eudora Ibiam, who, in 15 years of “courtship” (1924 to 1939), met face-to-face only about three or four times, the rest of the courtship being carried out through correspondence.
“The following year, 1947, I spent part of my holidays at Elelenwa with a family friend who was a teacher there. I had the opportunity of going with the teachers and the girls to morning service in town on Sunday morning and to afternoon service in the school chapel. I saw Beatrice there. The following year, 1948, because of a strike by King’s College boarders, the school was closed in December and I was at Oko for Christmas.
“With my aunt, Mrs. Patience Okafor (nee Ekwueme), arranging a rendezvous, I met Beatrice at Ndiowu in December. So, it was more or less a once-a-year meeting filled in-between with correspondence until I traveled overseas for further studies in 1952.
“While I was abroad, she taught at Elelenwa from January 1954 to December 1958, after her training at United Missionary College, Ibadan. Following her very good result in her Cambridge School Certificate from Elelenwa in December 1951, there were many suitors seeking her hand in marriage. They were mostly well educated and successful young men from the Aro-diaspora in Awka Division.
“She did not encourage any of the suitors and it came to a point when one prominent Aro leader from Aguata County Council Area challenged her uncle to suggest that she was rejecting all the Aro suitors because she was waiting for one Ekwueme who was studying overseas. How could she prefer “Ndi-Mba-Akameshi” to an Aro man?
“Incidentally, two of the man’s daughters were eventually married to “Ndi-Mba-Akameshi” from towns much further away than Oko which is just next door to Ndiowu and Ndikelionwu.
“I returned to Nigeria in June 1957 after my studies. B was still teaching at Elelenwa, and waiting. She continued teaching there until December 1958. In mid-1958, she was awarded an Eastern Nigeria Government’s scholarship to study overseas, but as it was then too late to obtain admission for that year’s session, the scholarship was deferred to 1959 and was tenable at Portsmouth College of Education in England.
“In January, she was posted to St. Catherine’s Secondary School, Nkwerre; a new CMS institution for girls.
“In view of her imminent departure to the United Kingdom, my family made a formal approach for her hand in marriage in April, 1959. The final approach was to be made in August just prior to her departure. I was; of course, ready to wait for her to complete her proposed three-year sojourn in the United Kingdom and to return to Nigeria before our formal church wedding.
“Then, tragically, my elder brother who was studying Law in the United Kingdom died in July. My family then thought that it was not necessary, under the circumstances, to marry a girl and allow her to travel abroad for a three-year course. It was a very delicate and difficult point to present to B’s family, after they had given her a “send-off’ with all the attendant celebration.
“In the end, the lot fell on B to make the choice and take the decision either to go for further studies overseas or to marry her “Ndi-Mba-Akameshi” suitor. She confided her decision to a favourite uncle, who carefully presented the unpalatable decision to the family.
“And so, on December 19, 1959, we were wedded by the late Rt. Reverend C.J. Patterson, Bishop on the Niger, later Archbishop of West Africa at the All Saints Cathedral, Onitsha.
“Until then, in spite of my escapades abroad and experience with white, black, brown and yellow, I had B located in a compartment marked with a “notice” “Noli tangere” “Do not touch”.
“After our wedding, we traveled to Calabar for our honeymoon and on Christmas Eve in 1959, I discovered that what I thought was a private “notice” placed by me was, in fact, a bold poster to the whole world; “Noli tangere”. She had been untouched.
“We returned to Lagos in January 1960 and started our married life in a humble way in a two-bedroom ground floor flat at Simpson Street, Ebute-Metta, which was effectively reduced to a one-bedroom flat, the lounge/dining area having been converted to the first office of Ekwueme Associates, Architects and Town Planners.
“The main raison d’etre for our rushed marriage did not immediately materialise, which is a lesson in waiting for God’s time and not playing God. For six years, we had no issue. There was no shortage of advisers to both B and me as to what she or I had to do to change the situation. Then, in 1966, we had our first child, a boy, “John”, still-born; and in 1967 our second child, another boy, “Gains”, premature; and finally in 1968, in the thick of the civil war, our third child, a beautiful baby girl, Chidi, (born in England) was born. She stayed and opened the door to many more beautiful children.
“Under the circumstances of the raging civil war, and B’s absence, my nuclear family structure became complicated. This structure thenceforth continued to grow in complexity and intricacy as the years wore on. But thanks to B; we have not had an explosion as I have seen happen in many similar situations. During the political days, 1979 to 1983, she played the role of de facto First Lady. In NPN circles, I was known as a “technocrat” and B was known as the “politician”.
“About five years ago, in December 2009, we celebrated 50 years of our marriage in a Thanksgiving Service at The Cathedral Church of the Good Shepherd, Enugu the venue of this 80th birthday celebration. Almost two years ago, I celebrated my own 80th birthday and today as we celebrate B’s 80th birthday, I offer my salute, congratulations and best wishes to a woman who has remained true since I met her as a small 12-year-old girl in Port Harcourt 68 years ago and who, over a period of 55 years of our marriage, has managed to keep the ship of our household afloat on an even-keel in spite of sometimes scandalously turbulent waters.
“We pray that God may grant B good health, continuing good humour and good devotion to her God for another 10, 20 or 30 years. Many happy returns of this day!”
