The Nation Newspaper

Author: The Nation

  • Sowore: Nigeria can’t afford another Boko Haram/Biafra insurgency – Presidency

     

    Bolaji Ogundele, Abuja

    The Nigerian Presidency, on Sunday, reacted to the raging debates and harsh reactions that have trailed the arrest and trial of the Convener of ‘Revolution Now’ agitation, Omoyele Sowore.

    It said the government and its agencies would not stand asides, fold their arms and watch another latently dangerous agitation, like the Boko Haram terrorism and the Nnamdi Kanu-led Biafran agitation plunge the country deeper into violent crisis.

    Senior Special Assistant to President Muhammadu Buhari on Media and Publicity, Mallam Garba Shehu, in a statement made available to State House Correspondents, noted that Mr. Sowore, whom he described as “the agitator”, is not just an “ordinary citizen expressing his views freely on social media and the internet”.

    According to him, Sowore, a presidential candidate in the last general election, publisher of one of the most widely read online newspaper, with base in the United States of America, now calling for a revolution to overthrow a democratically elected government, is definitely a person of interest to security agents.

    He also pointed out the fact that the Department of State Security (DSS), did not need prompting from the Presidency to carry out its constitutionally assigned responsibility to arrest situations that are potentially threatening to the peace, safety and security of the country anytime it discovers it.

    Read Also: We did not invade courtroom to arrest Sowore, says DSS

    He, however, reiterated that there is no serious government or state in the world that will condone anyone or group that openly calls for its destabilization, adding that Sowore, with his base in New York, USA, had no fear of sharing in the tribulation that will follow the sort of incendiary he champion, as he could easy slip out to the country and leave the rest of the country to bear the consequences of the crisis he must have caused.

    “The DSS does not necessarily need the permission of the Presidency in all cases to carry out its essential responsibilities that are laid down in the Nigerian Constitution – which was the foundation for the restoration of democracy in our country in 1999.

    “However, it should not surprise anyone who has followed his actions and words that Sowore is a person of interest to the DSS. Sowore called for a revolution to overthrow the democratically elected government of Nigeria. He did so on television, and from a privileged position as the owner of a widely read digital newspaper run from the United States of America.

    “He founded an organisation, Revolution Now, to launch, in their own words, “Days of Rage”, with the publicised purpose of fomenting mass civil unrest and the elected administration’s overthrow. No government will allow anybody to openly call for destabilization in the country and do nothing.

    “Mr. Sowore is no ordinary citizen expressing his views freely on social media and the internet. He was a presidential candidate himself, who ran – and lost – as the flag bearer of the African Action Congress (AAC) in the February 23 general elections.

    “Nigeria’s democracy was a long time in the making, and was achieved after decades of often harsh, military-led overthrows of government: the kind of situation Sowore was advocating. To believe in and desire armed revolution is not normal amongst ‘human rights activists’, as Sowore has been incorrectly described.

    “Again, it is no surprise that he should be a person of interest to the DSS. Nigeria is already dealing with an insurgency that has left millions of people displaced and desperate in the northeastern region of our country. The Boko Haram militants, who are behind the violence, also fancy themselves to be fighting for some sort of revolution.

    “Nigerians do not need another spate of lawlessness and loss of lives all in the name of ‘revolution’, especially not one that is orchestrated by a man who makes his home in far away New York – and who can easily disappear and leave behind whatever instability he intends to cause, to wit, Nnamdi Kanu. This is a matter for the DSS, acting under its powers”, the statement said.

  • Abia sets up committee to verify NDDC projects in the state

    Sunny Nwankwo, Umuahia

    Abia State government will on Monday in Umuahia, the state capital inaugurate a committee that will verify ongoing and completed projects of the Niger Delta Development Commission (NDDC) across the 17 local governments in the state.

    The committee which is expected to be inaugurated by the Secretary to the State Government, Barr Chris Ezem is expected to turn in their reports within two weeks

    Members of the committee include Bishop Sunday Onuoha (Chairman), Elder Nwala Richard (Secretary), Engr Uzor Nwankwo (Member), Mr. Gabriel Aguwa Paul (Member), Chief Jude Chijioke Ndukwe (Member).

    At the time of this report, the state government is yet to make public the terms of reference of the committee, though a source within the circles of governance disclosed that the terms of reference of the committee would be made open on Monday when they would be inaugurated by the SSG.

    Governor, Dr. Okezie Ikpeazu had pledged to collaborate with the NDDC in its renewed effort to address the issues confronting the people when he received in audience the Acting Managing Director/ Chief Executive Officer of the Niger Delta Development Commission, Gbene (Dr) Joi Nuneih and her team at Government House Umuahia.

    The Governor noted that it was the first time NDDC is responding to the issues that confront the people and commended the inclusion approach introduced by the Ag. MD.

    He called for support to the new NDDC boss in her bid remodeling the NDDC in order to cater for the needs of oil producing communities.

    Ikpeazu who called on the Nuneih led NDDC to embark on projects dispassionately also lauded the member of the House Committee on NDDC and representative of Bende in the House of Representatives, Hon. Benjamin Kalu for his quality representation.

    Read Also: Why NDDC has interim board, by Akpabio

     

    Gbene Nuneih while disclosing that there are a total of Six Hundred and Thirty-Three (633) NDDC projects at various stages in the state, saying that their visit to Abia was to see things for themselves and also to officially handover the list of NDDC projects in the state to the Governor.

    According to her, the essence was to avoid duplication of projects and to do away with agents and regretted the disappointing state of the oil communities.

    Mrs. Nuneih stated the commission’s commitment is to have credibility as well as to collaborate with the states with a view to working directly with the rural communities.

    Also, the member representing Bende Federal Constituency and Chairman House Committee on Media and Publicity, Hon. Benjamin Okezie Kalu stated the need to clean up the Niger Delta Development Commission (NDDC) and also get things right.

    Kalu noted that with the presentation of the list of projects in the State, duplication of projects will be circumvented considering the paucity of funds in the State.

    He also stated that the tour will bring about a proper needs assessment analysis of the people while assuring the Governor that the commission will live up to expectations.

  • Omo-Agege’s aide survives assassination attempt in Delta

    Okungbowa Aiwerie, Asaba

    An aide to the Deputy Senate President , Senator Ovie Omo-Agege on Youths Affairs, Mr Efe Ugbarugba has narrowly escaped death after he was allegedly attacked by unknown gunmen in Otokutu-Agbarha, Ughelli North L.G.A, Delta State.

    Ugbarugba who is also the Youth Leader of APC in Ughelli North L.G.A alleged that the incident occurred at about 8pm on Wednesday 4 December.

    He said he was attacked after dropping off his wife and kid at home and was attempting to drive off.

    He said he sighted some persons approaching him with guns, adding that as he engaged his car to drive off,the assassin’s shot at him.

    Read Also: APC, PDP disagree on alleged assassination attempt

    He said: “It was by the special grace of God that I escaped being killed by the suspected assassins. They fired several shots at my car. One of the bullets hit me on the head after piecing through my car windscreen”.

    He added that he drove straight to the police station to report the incident and also secure police report which enabled him seek medical attention.

    He called on law enforcement agents to fish out those behind the heinous crime, lamenting that he now leaves in fears with members of his family.

    Continuing, Ugbarugba said: “I want to sincerely appeal to our security agents to fish out those unknown gunmen who wanted to kill me for no reason. I strongly appeal to our security agencies to urgently do something. No arrest has been made and this is why I am crying out for security to be beefed up around me”.

  • Investments in education, infrastructure, others will be our priority — AbdulRazaq

    From Adekunle Jimoh, Ilorin

    Kwara state Governor AbdulRahman AbdulRazaq on Sunday said his dministration would lay emphasis on big investments in education, infrastructure, health, agriculture, enterprise, and human capital
    development.

    Mallam AbdulRazaq said this in an address to wrap the three-day retreat held for his cabinet picks in Patigi, Patigi local government area of the state.

    The governor said the state is almost starting “from the scratch” across every sector, especially education and primary healthcare, and directed the appointees to be ready to spend long hours, listen more, and work as a team to rebuild the state.

    “The manifesto has been dissected and as you have known, we are going to emphasise on key issues because if we try to do everything, at the end of the day, we might look back and see that we’ve probably done
    nothing,” AbdulRazaq said, detailing the challenges ahead and the opportunities in them for Kwara.

    Read Also: AbdulRazaq vows not to spare looters

     

    “We have to do big in agriculture, health care, education and enterprise – social investment scheme, job creation and infrastructure. I was (just coming from) Kpada, a journey of 30 minutes from Patigi took almost two hours. There is no road, no electricity, the health care and the school system has collapsed and
    so on. These are part of the challenges you will face when you assume office. It cuts across.

    “We’re building from the scratch and people may not understand the enormity of the challenges you are all going to face. You will all have sleepless nights. I can’t over-emphasise the challenges ahead of us and that means we all have to work together. That is what a cabinet is all about. We are all in it together like the symbol of our political party — broom. So, we need to be strong together to move the state forward.”

    He urged the appointees to ensure that they constantly relate with their communities for their input into governance, and said his administration will not abandon projects inherited from the previous administration but may always renegotiate the contracts to save public funds.

    “You are the ambassadors of your community and you must be able to tell us what their priorities are. They must feel your impacts in your community. We need to know what the priority projects are in your community,” AbdulRazaq said.

    The retreat, which attracted top-notch experts from various sectors of the Nigerian economy as facilitators, was held between Wednesday and Friday and featured drills on public service rules, procurement
    process, public relations, and practical tips on how to deliver democracy dividends to the public.

  • Bukola Saraki smiles again

    Oladapo Sofowora

    Senate President of the 8th Assembly, Senator Olubukola Abubakar Saraki, might currently be facing quite a ?turbulent time. First, it was losing his bid to return to the red chambers during the just concluded general election. Last week, the court declared interim forfeiture of his highbrow properties in Ilorin, alleging it was built with public funds when he was Governor of Kwara.

    While the two-term Governor of Kwara state was still nurturing the verdict of the court injunction on his Ilorin property interim forfeiture, his creator gave him and his household a big reason to smile again.

    Read Also: Court orders interim forfeiture of two more of Saraki’s houses

    He was blessed with a gift laced with a title money cannot buy. His eldest daughter, Olutosin Halima Saraki married to Adeniyi Olatunde Olukoya, delivered a bouncing baby girl, penutimate Friday, at a highbrow hospital located in the United Kingdom making him a proud first time grand father.

    Society Rendezvous gathered that Dr Bukola and his wife Toyin, immediately jetted down to the UK the next day to see their grand child and also give moral support to the nursing mother. The name of the child is yet to be disclosed as mother and daughter, we gathered are doing good.

  • Setting a solid foundation for your home (1)

    Dear reader,  happy new and glorious month, dear reader. This year must have begun on a wonderful note for you, filled with so many expectations for the best. All of your desires for this year will be greatly manifested, in Jesus’ name! I am glad to let you know that God has so many good things in store for you, your home, spouses, children, business, finance and career. God is too faithful to fail! Whatever promises from His Word you have held on to till date will find speedy fulfilment beginning from this month, in Jesus’ name!

    The year is still very young and this is a perfect time to make right decisions about your family life. It is often said that the way you begin a thing determines the end of it. That is why in this great month, I will be teaching on: Setting a Solid Foundation for Your Home. We all know that the foundation of a building is the most crucial aspect of it.  No matter how glorious a building is, if its foundation is faulty, then it does not stand a chance in the face of a storm.  No wonder the Word of God states: If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do? (Psalm 11:3). The strength, height and lifespan of any building is determined by its foundation. A building without a solid foundation is not going to last long, no matter how beautiful it may look. The mere blowing of the wind will bring it crumbling down, because the foundation cannot accommodate the strength of that wind.

    Similarly, a marriage without a solid foundation cannot stand the test of time. Success in marriage and family life, therefore, hinges on the quality of your foundation. There is nothing that can really substitute the need for a solid foundation and to set your marital foundation right, you need to begin by making a resolution to depart from iniquity. The Word of God says: Nevertheless the foundation of God standeth sure, having this seal, The Lord knoweth them that are his. And, Let every one that nameth the name of Christ depart from iniquity (2 Timothy 2:19). To have a sure foundation, therefore, it is of utmost importance for you to really depart from iniquity. The only thing that will hinder God’s blessing in your marriage and family this year is sin. Sin is a destroyer of destiny. Your destiny shall never be destroyed, in Jesus’ name! Sin has robbed many families of the blessings of God and their true place in life.

    As a family, you need to do away with sin and live a righteous life. Righteousness is the sure foundation upon which a life of distinction is built. Until this is in place, life remains an endless struggle. We live in a world of sin and it has become the order of the day and the way of life in the world today. Families that will stand out are those who will care to embrace purity. The Word of God says: Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God (Matthew 5:8). If you really want to see God’s intervention and manifestations in your life, marriage and family this year, it is time for you to clean up and return to God. The Bible says: And the Lord said unto Moses, Go unto the people, and sanctify them to day and to morrow, and let them wash their clothes (Exodus 19:10).

    The first requirement for a life of purity is a departure from iniquity.  It is interesting for you to know that the Bible places the responsibility of departing from evil on you and me. You can’t sit down and wait for iniquity to depart from you; the onus lies on you to make a complete departure from whatever sin has been ravaging your Christian colour. The Word of God says: …For sin shall not have dominion over you… (Romans 6:14). The price for sin has been fully paid but you need to make your choice whether to depart or to remain in sin. The Bible says: What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? (Romans 6:1).

    I want you to know that Jesus Christ did not shed His Blood for fun; He did so to provide for you and me an eternal cleansing from sin.  I want to say here that as a woman, you must not allow yourself to be deceived by sin. Do you remember how Eve fell? The serpent deceived her through his subtlety.  You have been warned seriously by the Word of God in 2 Corinthians 11:3:  But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ.

    We all know that sin crept into the world through womanhood because Eve allowed herself to be deceived. Unfortunately, satan has not changed his tactics. He is still on the lookout for women to deceive, but he cannot get you!  Eve lost her unique place to sin. It destroyed her destiny, and robbed her of a life of fulfilment. The devil got Eve, but he will not get at you!

    The moment sin came, it birthed evils. One of the evils that manifested after sin was selfishness.  When God came into the garden and asked Adam why he had transgressed His command not to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, Adam blamed Eve. Then God turned and asked, “What is this that thou hast done?” And Eve shifted the blame, “The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat”. That is selfishness! Today, many homes have been broken because nobody wants to give preference to the other.  The man is selfish, the woman is selfish, and the children are selfish!  All each person thinks about is “Me, Myself and I”. This even reflects in the kind of prayers they say, “Lord, bless me. Remember me with favour. Help me to succeed.  Well, if you care to remember others, not bad, but if not, still don’t forget me.”

    It is a known fact that humanity was corrupted through a woman, but God in His infinite mercy also chose to bring redemption to mankind through a woman. So, womanhood (or the feminine nature) is not an excuse to live in sin. Every woman can choose either to be a Mary or an Eve, and whether to live a pure or an impure life. The ball is actually in your court!

    Therefore, if you have chosen to live a pure life, then you need to surrender your life to Jesus. Just say this prayer in faith: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. I accept You as my Lord and personal Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for delivering me from sin and satan to serve the living God and thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    Congratulations! If you prayed this simple prayer of faith with me, you are born again and now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily; obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21). With this, you are guaranteed all-round rest and peace in Jesus’ name! Call or write to share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org, 07026385437 OR 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building a Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

     

  • What is a urinary tract infection (UTI) in children? (3)

    AFTER a few doses of the antibiotic, your child may appear much better. Most UTIs are cured within a week if treated the right way, but often it may take weeks until all the symptoms are gone. It is important that your child take the antibiotic meds as ordered by your health care provider even if the symptoms have gone away. Unless UTIs are fully treated, they may return, or your child may get another infection.

    If symptoms get worse or do not get better within 3 days, your child may need to go to the hospital.

    After Treatment

    Once the infection has cleared, your child’s health care provider may suggest more tests, particularly if your child has been treated for a kidney infection. The tests are to make sure there are no problems in the urinary tract that might keep your child’s body from fighting off infection, and to see whether there has been any damage to the kidney from the UTI. No single test can tell everything about the urinary tract that might be important to know after a UTI, so many tests are often ordered. If these tests show something abnormal in the urinary tract, your health care provider may want your child to see a pediatric urologist (a health care provider who specializes in problems of the urinary system in children).

    The tests may include:

    Kidney and/or Bladder Ultrasonography (Ultrasound)

    This test gets pictures of the kidney and bladder using sound waves. This test may show shadows that point to some kinds of abnormalities, like blockages, but can’t show all important urinary tract abnormalities. It also can’t tell how well the kidney is working.

    Voiding Cystourethrogram (VCUG)

    This test can show abnormalities of the inside of the urethra and bladder, and if urine flow is normal when the bladder empties. It also shows if urine from the bladder is backing up into the ureters (vesicoureteral reflux) and whether it reaches the kidneys. For this test a small, soft tube (catheter) is placed into the urethra. A liquid that can be seen on x-rays is then put into the bladder through the tube until your child urinates.

    Read Also: What is a urinary tract infection (UTI) in children? (2)

    Nuclear Scans

    There are different kinds of scans of the bladder and kidneys, and each can give different kinds of information. These scans use liquids that have tiny amounts of a radioactive tracer in them. From these tests, a health care provider can sometimes tell how well the kidneys work, the shape of the kidneys, and if the urine empties from the kidneys or bladder in a normal way. Though the liquids used have radioactive matter in them, the amount is very small and will not hurt your child.

    CT Scan or MRI

    These tests look at the bladder and kidneys in 3-D. They are sometimes used in cases where other studies are not clear and more details of these organs may be needed.

  • Had I known…

    Adeola ADEBIYI

    AS I sat on my wheel chair in the front of a mirror, I realise how ugly I now look with half of my face melted away, and one of my arms which suddenly disappeared over night.

    I looked at the wall and my eyes landed on my portrait, which was given to me by a friend on my twenty sixth birthday.

    I looked so beautiful in it with the white set of my teeth dazzling like the moonlight. Comparing the lady in the portrait with the lady seated on the wheel chair, the difference is just too clear and I wonder if this is how one’s life changes.

    I am Adesua Arowojobe and very beautiful lady back in those days. I am the first in a family of five; three girls and two boys.

    I will regard my family as a poor one, we find it hard to eat twice in a day and my parents only strove hard to see me through the university.

    During my university days, I had a boyfriend whom I tried all I could to be faithful to; even though I can’t point at anything he did or brought for me.

    I’d call his type of relationship a parasitic one because he was the one getting from me even though I didn’t have much.

    We lived together throughout my stay in school because my parents couldn’t raise enough money for me to get an apartment. This made me get pregnant for him several times which resulted in several abortions.

    Type of friends I was keeping then was the big girls on campus. They advised me to leave my boyfriend (Tony) and join their aristos click.

    Read Also: ‘The secret of my youthful look’

    My boyfriend knew they wanted to win me to their side, so he tried his best to separate me from them. But I had to become close with them again when I needed money to write my project which my parents could not afford.

    One of them, whose name was Toyin helped me with the money but not without reminding me of the benefit I would get if I join them.

    I finished from school and went for my service, I was posted to the north while Tony did his own in Lagos. Towards the end of my service year, I noticed that my boyfriend’s attitude towards me has changed.

    I questioned him but he gave his reasons. After the Youth Service, Tony didn’t stay long before getting a job and after two months he told me he had to quit the relationship because he needed someone that is very much younger than I was.

    It wasn’t easy forgetting him, but I had to try because I desperately needed a job then and the frustration my mum was giving me then was unbearable, she lamented any time I went to her for transport; fare for me to go interviews.

    My younger ones were also looking up to me, so I decided to forget about tony and tightened my belt so as to get a good job. After a year and four months I still could not get a job. I got fed up and was determined to go for whatever opportunity that came up.

    One fateful day, while coming from a place where I went to check the result of an interview I went for, I ran into Toyin with whom I had lost contact since we graduated. She was so happy seeing me and I was too. She was in a jeep and was really looking okay.

    She took me to an eatery where we talked. She told me one of our friends now lives in UK where she owns a boutique; another is happily marries to a senator while she (Toyin) is into importing and exporting of lace materials.

    I told her my story and she blamed me for everything. She gave me her address and told me to come and her so that she could arrange something for me.

    Two days later I went to see her and she told me that she has called one of her Alhaji’s and that the man was willing to meet and help me.

    She gave me some money to get myself some clothes,. During that weekend we both travelled to Abuja, where I met the Alhaji; Taofeek a friend to her man-friend.

    Alhaji was so nice to me, he provided all I needed and transformed me over night. I forgot all about getting a job and waited for Alhaji to fulfil his promise of setting up a business for me.

    My family were so proud of me and my mum advised me to marry Alhaji if he proposed.

    Things were going on smoothly until the day Alhaji Taofeek and Toyin’s Alhaji told us (Toyin and I) that they had a party they would want both of us to attend with them.

    They went before us, but sent one of their drivers to come and pick us. The party was in the north, so we had to travel far. It was on our way going that we had a fatal accident that claimed the life of both Toyin and the driver.

    I was just lucky to be alive. My parents had to spend all they had gained from Alhaji on me to be in the condition that I now am.

  • How to deal with confessions in a relationship

    By Rois Ola

    AZUKA and Nkem grew up as childhood sweethearts, Azuka’s parents and Nkem’s parents had been family friends for years. They both went to the same primary school but due to a federal government policy, Azuka and her family had to relocate to another city.

    Fortunately, they reunited in university and their love for each other was stronger than ever. They eventually got married a few years after University, but never told each other some secrets from their past while they were separated. Azuka was raped by her maternal uncle while in secondary school and gave birth to a baby girl, whom the world thinks is her baby sister. Nkem on the other hand had once been arrested for armed robbery immediately after high school, due to his parents influence he was set free, he is now a changed man and wants to be a law abiding citizen, yet Azuka is not aware of this past life.

    After a while Azuka’s mother died and the question of who would be responsible for Azuka’s daughter came up unfortunately Nkem was not aware Azuka was a mother, because she never told him. Nkem also needed to change jobs but was denied the new position because of his past criminal record and unfortunately he never told Azuka!!

    This is a situation many people face, some are free from it, while some will never be and die with these secrets. Life is truly tough because we continuously face the consequence of our decisions every single day.

    It is said by some researchers that one in every five people have kept major secrets from their partner. These secrets come in different forms from secret savings, to secret house, to secret children, secret spouse, secret car, secret clothes, secret investments, secret cash and the list goes on. There’s a general assumption that secrets are bad. And it’s a pretty reliable rule of thumb that honesty is best with the people you love like your partner, your children, your family, your best friend, anyone who matters to you deserves the TRUTH. — because secrets get in the way of real intimacy, they hinder you, they keep nagging your mind and thought, make you falter. But there are all sorts of reasons why, sometimes, coming clean may do more harm than good, some secrets destroy everything and the ripple effect is just like a tsunami sweeping everything away.

    In this case I’m not talking about small secrets, but really who is to say what’s small or big in terms of secrets?  What may be small to you, will appear mighty to another person. A minor misdemeanor is another person’s betrayal.

    Read Also: How to survive a broken relationship

     

    Long-held secrets have the ability to destroy more than you can imagine. Why?  because the person is changed forever in the other person’s eyes, you just may never be able to see them the same way again. generally, people recover on different levels some do not have the ability to recover from betrayal of trust, however hard they try, this is just how it is for them.

    I mean obviously if you KNOW what you are doing is wrong why do it anyway? When it will be so difficult to own up, but then this is life, full of mystery and should we say “the devil?” who makes us do things (he always gets the blame).  The sad part is there is nothing like the right time for a confession, the day you think is the right time may be the wrong one, but you cannot keep avoiding it.

    There is a research (not my opinion) that 18 per cent of over-40s keep hefty stashes of cash secret from their partners. While another says some couples can keep secrets for as long as 25years (wow really?) then again who is a saint? Who is willing to cast the first stone?

    I will discuss a few of these secrets with you below

    The secret of having Affairs and/ or one-night stand

    I believe that the damage a secret can cause in your relationship depends on your personal perception. Also in some cases how your partner perceives it to be, the more you keep it, the harder it is to confess. The secret will not give you peace of mind. I had a case of someone who had a one-night stand, that was meant to be “meaningless” the cost of keeping over time became an additional burden. let’s not even talk about porn, debt, gambling, another wife or husband hidden somewhere or having a constant side chick or side bae, an ongoing relationship that does not seem to have an expiry date.

    Coming clean means you have to change, are you ready to?

    The Effect of confession

    It may be a relief at long last to get a secret off your chest and finally be free. But what about the person who has been kept in the dark? How can you tell what the reaction will be? secrecy is deadly.   It is nearly always better not to have secrets, but sometimes it might be better to keep quite in a wise Head, the decision is yours. You have to think about what you’re hoping to achieve and be ready for the consequence, you also have to think about keeping quiet and be ready for what comes after or maybe never just maybe.

    Secrets of the family

    For any family, there should be boundaries on secrecy. while some couples may think there is nothing wrong in letting the kids know about what goes on between the couple it is not ideal to be too open or frank with them, especially if they are not old enough to fully comprehend issues on ground. Honesty is best. But that doesn’t mean revealing all the dirty details. I usually advise that couples should censor with wisdom their words and think carefully about motives before you give away too much about your life or issues between you and your partner

    Ultimately, it’s up to you as a couple to decide what’s appropriate for them. But never underestimate the impact of revealing secrets to your children. Be wise

    Steps to take if you decide to confess a secret

    — Think about how your partner will feel. Will it be good? will be bad? or downright ugly? Put yourself in his or her shoes.

    — It’s an awesome relief if you have now decided to come clean yourself. It’s much harder if you get caught with that secret, and also difficult if you are the one it is being hidden from.

    — Be ready for hard work, because when trust is lost gaining it back is serious pressure, your every move after this will be scrutinized closely, you must be ready. And it will take time. Sometimes it is difficult to gauge the real depth of damage confession brings. It’s just a risk one may have to take to set things right.

    —  The onus will now be on you to lay emphasis that you believe honesty is a risk worth taking because you value the relationship (that will not be easy to say)

    —  Have it in mind that if your relationship is truly strong, and you are prepared to put in the work, and also face the music, then confession can lead to renewed trust and closeness. you just have to try and convince them that you will not or never repeat those things and own up quickly when you need help to resist. I wish you all the best.

  • A patriot’s odyssey

    By Ozolua Uhakheme

    Riding the storm with God in my sails is essentially about gratitude a deeply felt expression of gratitude of the part of the author to his creator for the extraordinary kindness and protection he enjoyed through the duration of a successful   but sometimes perilous life journey. After the near fatal encounter at Ikeja airport with a British interrogator on July 30th 1966, three battlefront injuries sustained during the Nigeria Biafra hostilities; after being detained at the end of the war; after being cleared by a military panel and reabsorbed in the Nigeria Navy, the author was able to rise to the apex of his professional career to become chief of the Naval staff, what else could he do but give thanks God for his great favour.

    But this book is also, quite simply, a story in which the author, who is the central figure of the narrative, reveals the stuff of which he is made witty and intellectually alert, patriotic and principled, a hard worker, a mobilizer and a leader, a devoted family man,  a successful  business man and employer of labor

    The sixteen chapters are clearly captioned to make for easy reading with each chapter dealing on a specific event or string of events in the authors life history.  Although the events narrated are less chronological, there is an underlying lien of coherence that runs through the entire volume, I therefore recommend that the chapters be read in small thematic group which will help the reader understands and appreciate the landmark events which impact and define the man.

    Thus, it is suggested that chapters 1 and 2 be read together as “childhood and early adult years”, Nan 15 present “Madueke the devoted family man”.

    However, I am constrained to dwell a little more on a couple of events which I consider pivotal in the book and which best reveal the outstanding the legacies of Madueke as a visionary leader. Between January 5th 1984 and August 29th 1986, Madueke served as the military Governor of Old Anambra and Old Imo States respectively. It is pertinent to note that the two Old Anambra and Old Imo states today are made up of the five states of the South East namely Anambra, Enugu, Ebonyi, Imo and Abia. It is neither also Special Advisers nor Special Assistants. Yet, apart his every significant achievement in both states in the areas of road construction, primary health institution and environmental sanitation, Madueke left 2 monumental legacies for which he will continue to be remembered in history (all within a time lag of less than three years)

    Nnamdi Azikiwe Stadium, Enugu.

    This was an abandoned project, overgrown with grass, hardly beyond foundation level with #5million being owed contractors when Madueke became the Governor of Anambra, within a few months, his administration which had little or no funds, managed to bring the contractors back on site, mobilize the people of Anambra with the launch of a Stadium Appeal Fund, visited all the Local Government Areas and the major cities of Enugu, Onitsha, Lagos, Jos and Kano in search of funds and raised enough money to complete that stadium in a record time of 20months.

    Imo Airport Project, Owerri.

    On arrival in Imo, Madueke identified the people’s need for an airport, mobilized them using the strategy that worked for him in Anambra, and was able to start and move the Imo airport project to a point of no return with the money his government realized from the Airport Appeal Fund, also in record time

    These two seminal achievements were narrated in great detail by the author in chapter 8 and 9 and there is no more that can be said than to invite all well-meaning citizens of Old Anambra and Imo States to read through these chapters very carefully in order to know the about his accomplishments in the governance of these states.

    Abacha’s Provisional Ruling Council.

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    It will not be fair not to highlight, as part of Madueke’s sterling legacies in government, the role he played as a member of Gen. Abacha ‘s provisional ruling council. His general disposition towards dialogue and compromise on the Abiola issue, as well as his uncompromising stand on several other issues of national governance earned him the displeasure of the commander-in-chief and precipitated the truncation of the naval career. The same acute sense of patriotism, justice and fairness permit the views expressed in chapter 16, A country of our own where the author advocates the need for a decentralized structure of governance in Nigeria, Basically, he argues that it is absurd that the federal government should keep all the resources to itself and determine from Abuja the need of the federating states. A better approach would be for national Funds to be passed on to states which should be in a better position to know their problems and needs and how to use the funds available to address them. An example is the federal ministry of agriculture where the author asks: “who are the Federal Farmers”? Again how can somebody in Abuja know better than the man living in Abia or Kogi which roads are bad in these states and why the governors of these states wait for the federal government to come and maintain roads that run through their states all in the name of “federal roads” when it is their own people who bear the brunt of the bad condition of these roads? Such issues term the crux of the author’s position in chapter 16 when he writes: “It is my conviction that unless and until we address the fundamental defects of our structure, failure and difficulty in governance will continue to dog Nigeria, irrespective of who, or which political party, was in power”.

    The title of this book Riding the storms with God in my sails does justice to the author’s life experiences. He had indeed ridden storms but with God in his sails he was able to coast to safety: in all these he was a conqueror.