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Tag: boyfriend

  • My boyfriend sent me packing after infecting me with HIV,  says pregnant 19-year old girl

    My boyfriend sent me packing after infecting me with HIV,  says pregnant 19-year old girl

    A Pregnant 19-year-old girl rescued by a Good Samaritan in Awka, Anambra State has lamented that the man responsible for her pregnancy infected her with HIV and dumped her.

     The Nation gathered that the victim’s boyfriend identified as Chibuike, sent her parking after getting her pregnant.

     She was later handed over to a group of health workers who referred her to the Anambra State Ministry of Women Affairs and Social Welfare.

     Narrating her ordeal, the six-month pregnant girl said she had been homeless after she was chased out of the house following discovery that she was HIV positive.

     “I had been in a relationship with my boyfriend, Chibuike, for three years before he chased me out of the house after discovering I have HIV, and I have been homeless since then,” she said.

     While revealing her parents’ disappointment over her predicament, the lady thanked the state government for accepting to take care of her.

    Read Also: Herdsmen attacks: Sad memories of lost loved ones as displaced villagers return home in Nasarawa

     Earlier, the State Coordinator, Network of People Living with HIV in Nigeria (NEPWHAN), Mrs Gladys Ezembu, while handing the girl over to the Commissioner for Women and Social Welfare, Ify Obinabo, said the victim was brought to her organisation by a Good Samaritan.

     “A good Samaritan saw her stranded and decided to bring her to us. We ran some tests on her and discovered she is a carrier of the virus.

     “We immediately placed her on medication to prevent the unborn child from contracting the virus,” she said.

     Responding, Commissioner Obinabo appreciated the group for not abandoning the girl, promising to provide her with shelter pending her delivery.

     She also pledged to ensure the victim was quickly registered for ante-natal and at the same time commenced tracing her parents for further investigation.

  • Woman stabs boyfriend with knife

    A woman, Kehinde Ajimosu, has been arraigned at an Apapa Chief Magistrates’ Court for allegedly stabbing her boyfriend with a knife in the stomach, hand and buttocks.

    Ajimosu, 24, who lives at Akindele Street, Olodi-Apapa, Lagos, is facing a two-count charge of assault and breach of the peace. She pleaded not guilty.

    Prosecuting Inspector Ferdinand Asu said the accused committed the offence on November 4 at her home.

    He alleged that the accused stabbed the complainant, Aare Aminu, in the stomach, hand and buttocks.

    Asu said Ajimosu also conducted herself in a manner likely to cause a breach of the peace by running on the street with a knife in her hand.

    Read also: Kwara court remands five for alleged criminal trespass

    He said the suspect thought the complainant was cheating on her.

    The prosecutor said efforts by witnesses to stop her from stabbing her boyfriend proved abortive.

    Chief Magistrate Michael Olubi granted the accused N100, 000 bail, with two sureties in the like sum.

    He adjourned till January 9.

  • Girls…Must you have a boyfriend even at 18?

    DEAR Aunty Temilolu, A few months ago, I was browsing the internet in search of ways to stop masturbating and I stumbled on your articles on masturbation. To my surprise, after reading your articles and absorbing them in my spirit, I completely lost interest in what had taken over my life. Till today I haven’t been able to “play” with myself- in fact the thought never crosses my mind. I’m so relieved I have a “big adviser” who will see me through life rather than my friends who have been giving me wrong advice. Also, nothing bothers me anymore; I’m no longer depressed, I’m so happy! You inspire me a lot, God bless you ma!

    Sharon, P/H

     

    Dear Aunty Temilolu,

    I have been dating a guy for the past 4 years and everything was going on well until now. He had been asking me for sex which I refused. In recent times, he put pressure on me and said if I loved him, I’ll grant his request. I asked him what if I got pregnant and he said I wouldn’t get pregnant. We eventually had sex and now I’m 2 months pregnant. He stopped picking my calls after I told him.What will I do now?

    T.17 (100L Student)

     

    T…T…T…, when you were doing itdid you ask me if it was right for you to succumb to his pressure??? I feel so sorry for you. I’m so crushed I don’t even know how to handle this. To worsen matters, when I asked about his parents’ whereabouts, you told me they recently travelled out of the country. Doesn’t he have a family you know? Don’t you know his house or where did he lay you? I bet your parents don’t even know you’re pregnant! You just got admission into the university then this…what do we call this? We have to look for a way to get across to his parents or any of his family members whom I believe you must know since you’ve been lovers for some years. We’ll discuss further on the phone!

    My darling, precious, glorious, dignified, world-famous and heavenly celebrated Nigerian sisters,

    I repeat- “MUST YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND EVEN AT 18?” I keep telling you girls how important and delicate your ages 0-19 are. I keep emphasizing the impact your teenage years especially would have on your entire life. Did you even know that what you make of the first quarter of your life (the first 25 years) is what would determine the failure or success of the rest of your life? How I hate the devil! It knows once it derails you in your teen age, you may never fulfill God’s divine agenda for your destiny except God decides to single you out for mercy and re-alignment. The best time to lay a solid foundation for a fulfilling and glorious future in all ramifications is your teens. How much you concentrate on your studies would determine your grades, qualifications and eventually your job and level of income. If you can’t be well-grounded spiritually, if you can’t be in control of your spirituality and destiny in your teens, there are chances you’ll be so badly manipulated such that you will make fatal mistakes you may never recover from. If you can’t set your priorities right in your teens and recognize what is wrong for you to do and shun it as much as you can, I’m afraid you’ll end up on a wrong path in life. And you know what? Any path God hasn’t designed for you will bring you nothing but struggle, pain and tears! Hmm…girls…girls…girls….

    Unknown to your parents, when a lot of you should be exploiting your vivid imagination which is strongest, brightest and sharpest (in your teens) when you haven’t been bombarded by life’s challenges, you are busy falling in love up and down, high on boyfriends like cocaine!

    Dear teenage girl,

    Believe me, if you keep having sleepless nights over your boyfriend instead of your studies, YOU HAVE A BIG PROBLEM! May your life not go anti-clockwise in Jesus name. I pray for you from the bottom of my heart that God will have mercy on you, arrest your hearts and set it right and stop you from hurting your destiny and your future. And may He set you free from the shackles of peer pressure. I love you my darlings!

    To be continued.

  • My boyfriend tied me up and fled, says suspect

    Another suspect, Oguntoyin, 20, claimed she was brought to the hotel by her boyfriend, Bayo, an Internet fraudster, who, together with his friends, tied her up and fled.

    She said it was the first time he would take her to the hotel, adding that she knew nothing about the crimes being perpetrated there.

    She said: “It was the navy people that freed me from the bondage. My boyfriend Bayo and three of his friends tied me up. I didn’t know when they tied me.

    “He told me he wanted to go and use the ATM and that he would be back. I didn’t eat nor drink anything.  I only slept. But when I woke up and wanted to open the door, I discovered that I was tied.

    “They also told the receptionist to not allow me run. I know them that my boyfriend usually came here but yesterday was the first time he brought me. I have known him for three years now.”

    The tanker driver, Teller, claimed it was greed that lured him to the scene, adding that his friend, Muri White offered him N500,000 to use his truck to load siphoned petrol.

    He said he couldn’t reject the offer, giving that marketers usually hired the truck for N150,000 and he had to stay in a long queue at the depot.

    According to him, the offer was made on Sunday but he turned it down because his truck was not in good shape, adding that he accepted to load at the wee hours of yesterday.

    The receptionist, Gladys, said she was only hired about a month ago, adding that the manager instructed her to never collect money from Inspector Rabiu of room 208 and the other policeman who occupied room 209.

    She said the only suspicious thing she noticed was that Marijuana smoking men usually came to the premises for meetings.

    Oludara said most of the lodgers usually came in the night, adding that they came with jerry cans of petrol, which the security man at the hotel offloaded.

    She said Inspector Rabiu usually sat with the Marijuana smokers during their meetings but only drank.

    Oludara said when they complained to the manager about the strange and unacceptable behaviour of some of the guests, they were asked to mind their own business.

    The housekeeper, Adetunji said he usually saw tankers along the road, adding that for about two months, the tankers stopped coming but later resurfaced.

    Vincent and Kuti claimed they were artists and only came to stay in the hotel after performing at live shows to mark the nation’s 57th Independence Day.

  • I caught my wife with her boyfriend, husband tells court

    A middle-aged man, Dare Falana, yesterday told an Igando Customary Court that he caught his wife, Ganiyat, eating “Tantalizer’’ take-away with her boyfriend in his living room.

    Dare had urged the court to dissolve his marriage blessed with three children because of his wife’s infidelity, sex starvation and frequent fighting.

    He said: “Usually I come home late at night, but on this faithful day I decided to come home early, only for me to meet her with her boyfriend eating Tantalizers in our home.

    “I was too shocked to say anything; I left them there and went out but by the time I came back the man had left.

    “There was a time I went to Abuja before I came back she got into a fight and was arrested. I spent the N40, 000 I brought from Abuja on that case.’’

    He told the court that “my wife starves me of sex whenever I demanded for it.

    “I have to beg my wife for sex as if she is still my girlfriend. She plays all sorts of unimaginable pranks to escape having sex with me.

    “She only comes to me for sex when she feels like and not the other way round.

    “When I complaint to her sister, she told her that I have a disease that’s why she stopped having sex with me. I’m feed up, I can’t continue this way,’’ he said.

    The respondent denied allegations of infidelity, but admitted that she usually starve her husband of sex.

    She said: “He married me a virgin, how can I be so bold and bring my supposed boyfriend to my husband’s house, the supposed boyfriend is my distance relative.

    “I called my distant cousin, and told him I was hungry and that my children don’t have food to eat when they return from school. I specifically told him to get food for me and my children from the eatery.

    “My husband’s ways are questionable, he acts and talks desperately about making money at all cost. He keeps comparing me to his friend’s wife.

    “My husband told me that his friend’s wife is an ogbanje (witch) and she uses that to bring goodluck to her husband, that I should be doing same for him, which I refused.

    “He beats me up, but in spite of this I still love my husband,’’ Ganiyat said.

    The court President, Adegboyega Omilola, ordered the couple to attend an Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) on March 17.

    He adjourned the case till March 29 for hearing.

  • ‘My boyfriend dumped me because of weightlifting’

    ‘My boyfriend dumped me because of weightlifting’

    FOR Baliqis Otunla, winning three gold medals in weightlifting event at the 11th edition of the All Africa Games is the biggest achievement she has ever had. But her worry is not having someone by her side during such feat.

    Otunla, who is making her first appearance at the Africa’s mini-Olympic Games, revealed to Akeem Lawal that she had to break up with her former boyfriend since he could not cope with her involvement in the sport.

    “I was once in a relationship but it didn’t work out because my guy then was not comfortable with my calling as a weightlifter,” said Otunla after she wrought three gold medals in only her first appearance at the African Games in Congo Brazzaville. “He was complaining too much about my travelling for competitions, saying he cannot cope and even complained then that I will not be beautiful again because of weightlifting but I’ve decided to leave everything in the hands of God because I do not have to rush into any relationship  again.”

    She further explained that her focus is now squarely on her career until she finds a man of her dream: “I need a man that will understand me; a man that would give me support and be by my side to celebrate my success.

    “I’m not in any relationship at the moment and I think this contributed to my success here (at the African Games) since there was nobody disturbing me with calls asking me when I’m coming back home or what are you doing and stuff like that.

    “I was able to concentrate here but that does not say I won’t marry or go into relationship; in fact, I want it (relationship) and anything can happen any time by the grace of God,” Otunla admitted as she spoke on sundry issues.

    Three gold medals on her debut at African Games

    Well, I am extremely happy because, as a first timer, I never believe I could achieve such a great success. It was not on my mind to win gold medal but when we started and I saw that I was doing well, I said to myself that I should go for it. Also, it was not by my power but God’s. So when I made it, it was like a spirit came out from me and I felt, ‘so I’m still alive that I still have the ability to do it.’ I’m happy to have made such an impact. There is no sport (inclined) person in my family and when I told them that I won, they did not believe me. They asked if truly I won and I said to them that I did; it was then they now expressed gratitude to God that, at last, I was able to prove myself to them. That it was truly I wanted to go back into sport because they were not totally in support at the beginning of my career, they do not understand the sport or the importance of sport. They do not understand what it was all about. To them, I was wasting my time, playing away my future; that there are a lot of better things that I can do with my life rather than taking to sport. But with this success, they promised to celebrate it with me.

    Road to success

    Well, I will say it was not easy. It was rough, seriously and terribly rough. Rough in the sense that you have to train very well; stressful, struggle to make a better performance because it is all about record in weightlifting and what you have in your shoulder.  Even if you have injury but once you pray and believe you can achieve good results, you will want to go ahead once you trained so hard.

    Though it was rough, I enjoyed it.

    Dumping school for  weightlifting

    I was disturbed by my parents to go school but I had to put it aside as a part time student of Moshood Abiola Polytechnic, Abeokuta. I put it aside because I love this sport. I also went for fashion designing, yet I still could not finish it because of the love I have for weightlifting.  But with what I have achieved now, I can go back to school and even to fashion designing. I really want to go back to school because I will not want to be a liability to any man. Also, one needs to plan for life after sport because I will marry and settle down to live with my husband and children. Even as pet fashion, if I learn it, I will design my cloth by myself. With education, one would be respected; nobody will underrate you or look down on you. You will be respected and get good positions in the society. I have made up my mind that I will not allow anybody to look down on me because if you don’t know, you don’t know and people will rubbish you, but I don’t want that to happen to me. Even though delayed, that does not mean I can’t go back to school because I have already promised myself education once I achieve success in weightlifting and now that I am getting there, I have to go back so that I will know right from left.

    Picking interest in weightlifting

    My getting involved in weightlifting was like a child’s play. It was not what I actually set out for. Then I used to play football, but because of the way they treated us which I didn’t like. Apart from the stress, they didn’t encourage us. At times, you would be begging for assistance, but you won’t get it.  Even when you think you would make the team, you would be dropped. They would not pay allowance. So, when we were to go to Denmark but the trip was aborted without any concrete or genuine reasons, it was then I decided to quit football finally. And fortunately, I met one man Mr Ismaila Yusuf, a weightlifting coach at the National Stadium in Lagos who said I can do the sport. I asked, ‘how can that be possible when I do not have prior knowledge or any form of training?’ But he said I can do it. I told him I do not have the power to lift, he said it’s not about power but techniques and when I started gradually, I realised that I can do it. And in a particular day when I saw the way I developed with my muscles, I loved it and it was then I made up my mind to go into weightlifting fully and before I knew what was happening, I was invited to the national team and I said to myself this is where I belong; that it pays better than team event where I was not recognised and appreciated. I was invited to the national team for youth games and now I am at the top level of my career winning medals, and not just ordinary medals but gold and three at a time. I am really grateful to God and I am ready to do more.

    Eyes on Rio 2016 Olympics

    I was at 2012 National Sport Festival and I won three gold medals in 69 kg. Before then, I was in Egypt in 2010 for youth games qualifier, I picked three silver. That was my first international assignment before the Kenya Senior Olympic qualifier where I won three silver. This is the real thing that has happened to me, the big event. If my performance is okay for the Olympics, by the grace of God I shall be there to make the country proud as well as my family.  I’ve been inspired by a lot of people and the  first person I saw when I started was Juliet Ekueboh, a police officer, with her height and the way she carried herself but later left Nigeria and met another senior colleague who is in heavyweight category, Mariam Usman. She encourages one to always go for the best and a very determined athlete, so she is my role model.

    Of course, I would have been happier if Mariam (Usman) had won a gold medal here; that she won silver does not mean she is not good, it has been destined to be because she is a go-getter. It’s a game and we all came here to win. What happened has happened, she still deserved the honour. She inspires me a lot.

  • Looking great in boyfriend BLAZER

    Looking great in boyfriend BLAZER

    IF there is one trend that will never go out of style, it is the boyfriend blazer. It exudes stylish casualness that goes with everything, every personality, every style and every clothing.  Having a boyfriend jacket in your wardrobe can really help you create some great outfits

    Ways to rock boyfriend blazer

    *Wear it with jeans. You can also try the blazer with denim shorts.

    *Wear a long tunic dress underneath the blazer.

    *Top it off with a stylish necklace and  bracelets.

    *Add trendy jewellery for a fun outfit, for example, an oversized cocktail ring, bangles or chain bracelets and a necklace.

    *Wear it with a semi-formal dress or blouse. It adds a sleek and trendy sophistication to any special- occasion outfit.

    *For a fresh and super-cute look, pair it with smart or denim shorts.

  • Trace of destiny (2)

    Trace of destiny (2)

    It came to a point whenever I was home on holidays, I spent more time in Rachel’s place than in my own home.
    “We hardly see you these days, Jul. You are always with Rachel. Have you fallen in love with her? Is she your new girlfriend? What about Vera?” Mark, my younger brother queried. During vacations, both of us were usually together, hanging out and doing stuff together.
    “Are you jealous?” I countered teasingly. It was a Saturday and we were downstairs washing our parents’ cars in the courtyard.
    “You bet I am! I have lost my only brother to a ‘strange’ woman! Brother snatcher!” he said in mock anger. I laughed, playfully splashing him with some water from the bucket on the ground.
    “Stop oh! Or I will throw this soapy rag at you!” he said, waving the cloth at me threateningly. I laughed again and ran into the house.
    Later, in my room I thought about what my brother had said earlier about Rachel. He could be right. For whenever I was with her, I felt a kind of happiness and inner peace that I had never felt with any other girl including my current girlfriend, Vera. We had been dating for nearly two years and though I cared about her a lot, things had changed since I met Rachel. Most times, she was the one on my  mind, the one I was always thinking about. I was not sure she was aware of the way I felt about her; I had not told her about my feelings for her but I knew it was only a matter of time.
    ****
    A few days before I was to return to school, I invited Rachel out on a date. I borrowed my Mum’s car and we went to watch a movie. That evening before I dropped her at home, I opened up about the way I felt about her.
    “I know this might come as a surprise to you. But I can’t pretend any more. I’m in love with you, Rachel,” I stated.
    She did not look surprised or anything; she just looked up at me quickly before stating simply:
    “You can’t be. You have a girlfriend.”
    “I know. But I don’t love her. It’s you I love and want to be with,” I stated. I added that when I returned to school, I was going to break up with Vera.
    “It’s not fair to her, remaining with her when I’m in love with someone else,” I pointed out. That day, she did not give me any firm answer; she said she needed time to think about my proposal. So, I remained hopeful as we parted that night.
    On my last day, I went to Rachel’s house to inform her Mum about my leaving for school the next day.
    “She has gone to the salon to fix her hair,” the woman said on my arrival. She was watching a movie showing on the cable TV in the living room so I sat to keep her company. But she seemed to have lost interest in the film for she was more interested in chatting especially about her youngest daughter.
    “So, you like Rachel. I knew it! I could tell from the way you look at her!” she declared succinctly.
    “What?” I said, taken by surprise at her words.
    She laughed before saying:
    “Rachel told me everything. She tells me about her love life, you know. Unlike her sister!” She paused before adding:
    “I think she likes you too from the way she talks about you. You know, you are the first guy she has shown interest in since Tony.”
    Rachel had never mentioned him before and I became curious about him.
    “He was her ex-boyfriend,” she explained when she saw the quizzical expression on my face. “I think he was her first love; she used to be so crazy about him. When they were together, she would talk about him all day long till I got sick of hearing his name. But two years ago, they broke up and he left the country. He’s based in Canada now. Though she denies it, I think my daughter still loves him.”
    Rachel came in shortly after.
    “Hope Mum has not been boring you with tales of the past when she was the most beautiful girl in the country!” she said teasingly.
    I laughed at her words.
    “No. We were talking about you instead,” I stated. She glared at her Mum, grumbling about how she would not mind her business but always sticking her nose in her affairs. Then picking up her bag, she went to her room.
    Her Mum laughed, stating: “What other business do I have but you? Afterall, I’m a jobless woman!”
    “Your hair looks fine,” I complimented her sometime later as she saw me off. She smiled up at me and to my surprise, took my hand in hers.
    We walked in silence till we got to the gate of my house.
    “I will miss you,” I said, taking both of her hands in mine.
    “Call me when you get to school,” she said.
    “You bet I will!” I assured her. I kept to my promise, calling her regularly and enquiring about her Mum. It was while we were chatting one day on phone that she told me something that made me feel so happy, like a man who had won a fortune at the lottery…

    •Join us next Saturday for more of Julian and Rachel’s story!

    •Names have been changed to protect the identity of the narrator and other individuals in the story.

    •Send comments/suggestions to 08023201831(sms only), psaduwa@yahoo.com or psaduwa007@gmail.com

  • I feel cramps in my vagina when my boyfriend touches me

    Dear Aunty Ade, I’m 29 and one of your favourite fans; I always read your column. I have a big problem that is tearing me and my boyfriend apart. I feel cramps in my vagina when I’m not menstruating especially when my boyfriend touches me, like if he tries to kiss or caress me or even hold me. Please I need your help. Your biggest fan, Nancy.

    I suspect you have Vaginismus. Vaginismus is vaginal tightness causing discomfort, burning, pain, penetration problems, or complete inability to have intercourse.Vaginismus is a condition where there is involuntary tightness of the vagina during attempted intercourse. The tightness is actually caused by involuntary contractions of the pelvic floor muscles surrounding the vagina. The woman does not directly control or ‘will’ the tightness to occur; it is an involuntary pelvic response. She may not even have any awareness that the muscle response is causing the tightness or penetration problem.

    In some cases vaginismus tightness may begin to cause burning, pain, or stinging during intercourse. In other cases, penetration may be difficult or completely impossible. Vaginismus is the main cause of unconsummated relationships. The tightness can be so restrictive that the opening to the vagina is ‘closed off’ altogether and the man is unable to insert his penis. The pain of vaginismus ends when the sexual attempt stops, and usually intercourse must be halted due to pain or discomfort.

    Vaginismus can normally be treated and fully overcome in a reasonable time frame. Motivated women without significant complications usually find that six weeks is adequate to resolve their sexual pain or penetration problems. Research has shown that even two-week time frames are potentially realistic where there is an intense ‘full-time’ effort, professional assistance, and no significant complications. See your health care specialist for counseling. If they can’t help, I can help you procure a kit to help you overcome the problem.

  • My boyfriend has changed and it is difficult understand

    I am 19 and a student yet to gain admission. I have a boyfriend who used to be very caring and loving but he suddenly changed. He used to be the first to call me and the last to tell me goodnight, but all this have changed. When I told him my observation, he said it is going to be very hard to understand him. I also told his only sister and she said I should be patient with him. Please ma I need your help, I’m confused. Thanks and remain blessed.

     

    Dear girl, I think I like this your guy. I mean, he told you pointblank that it will be very difficult to understand him. He’s a very sincere person and I think you should respect that. He needs space, that’s what it means. That he’s gone off you for now doesn’t mean he’s gone off you for life. For now, he wants it that way, so adjust to the way things are now. When people require space, it may mean many things. He could be trying to sort out his life, and this relationship just doesn’t fit in for now. He might have found another love interest and if that is the case, to make him respect you, leave the shadows and give him time to study this new person. Chances are, if you’re a good person, he will soon start comparing your good points with hers and see you as an angel and come back. Whatever it is, give him the space he is silently asking for.