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Tag: domestic violence

  • Lagos, Fed Govt strengthen premarital counselling to curb domestic violence

    Lagos, Fed Govt strengthen premarital counselling to curb domestic violence

    • By Zainab Olufemi and Ajiboye Faith

    The Lagos State Government, in collaboration with the Federal Government, has stepped up efforts to curb domestic violence by strengthening premarital counselling for intending couples across the state.

    The initiative was driven by findings from the Lagos State Domestic and Sexual Violence Agency (DSVA), which said that a significant number of survivors of matrimonial abuse had prior knowledge of their partners’ abusive tendencies before marriage but still proceeded with the union.

    DSVA said about 70 per cent of those who reported cases of domestic violence admitted being aware of red flags before marriage, a development that highlighted the need for more proactive and sustainable preventive measures.

    To address this, the agency organised a capacity-building training for marriage registrars who interface directly with intending couples at marriage registries, aimed at equipping them with the skills required for effective premarital counselling.

    Speaking at the training, Executive Director of the Centre for Women’s Health and Information (CERWIN), Mrs. Atinuke Odunkoya, said the programme was designed to empower registrars to engage couples in meaningful conversations before marriage.

    She said premarital counselling provides a critical opportunity to address red flags, promote healthy boundaries and encourage honest discussions among intending couples.

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    Odunkoya noted that many marital crises stem from unresolved differences in values, backgrounds and expectations, stressing the need for a change in society’s perception of marriage.

    “A broken relationship is always better than a broken marriage. Marriages should contribute positively to society and promote values that discourage dysfunction and violence,” she said.

    Also speaking, President of the Institute of Marriage Education and Counselling of Nigeria, Mr. Emmanuel Oladele, commended the Lagos State Government for recognising the strategic role of marriage registrars in mitigating domestic violence.

    He said empowering registrars with the right knowledge would enhance their statutory duties and positively impact society.

    Oladele described the training as timely, particularly at a period when many intending couples lack adequate understanding of marriage, urging participants to apply the knowledge gained and continue to build their capacity.

    “What you don’t have, you cannot give,” he said.

    A participant at the training, Assistant Chief Executive Officer, Ojukoro Local Government, Mr. Ademola Awoyemi, described the programme as an eye-opener.

    He said the training exposed participants to deeper insights into counselling and the realities of marriage, noting that many people enter marriage for different reasons without fully understanding its demands.

    Awoyemi added that marriage requires readiness to learn, adapt and grow, advising intending couples to embrace communication as a key tool for preventing domestic violence.

    He called on the government to sustain enlightenment programmes that would help couples gain proper knowledge of marriage and foster healthier relationships.

  • ‘90% of Nigerians struggle with land disputes, domestic violence’

    ‘90% of Nigerians struggle with land disputes, domestic violence’

    More than 90 percent of Nigerians have encountered at least one legal problem in recent years, with many of these challenges remaining unresolved or recurring, according to a new national justice report.

    The Justice Needs and Satisfaction in Nigeria 2025 report, launched in Abuja by the Hague Institute for Innovation of Law (Hiil), is the country’s first longitudinal study of its kind. The research, conducted over four years, tracked the same group of individuals to understand how legal issues evolve and impact daily life.

    According to the findings, land disputes and domestic violence emerged as the most widespread and persistent legal problems affecting Nigerians across different communities.

    Hiil’s Country Representative, Ms Ijeoma Nwafor, described the report as an urgent wake-up call for justice providers and policymakers.

    “It highlights where current systems fall short and where people are left to navigate complex problems on their own. It shows the scale and persistence of justice problems that people are unable to resolve,” she said.

    Ms Nwafor emphasised the importance of people-centred data in addressing the justice gap.

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    “This report is not just about numbers; it’s about people’s lived experiences. It provides a roadmap for building more accessible and people-centred justice systems.

    “The justice gap in Nigeria is real and growing. But with the right tools and political will, it can be closed.”

     Dutch Ambassador to Nigeria, Mr Bengt van Loosdrecht, also called for stronger and more inclusive access to justice.

    “Justice should not be a luxury. It should be a commodity for everyone,” he said.

    The study found that land-related legal problems accounted for 24 percent of all unresolved or long-standing cases by the final year of the survey. Many of these disputes were addressed outside the formal justice system, with affected individuals relying on direct negotiation or community leaders due to the high cost and complexity of court processes.

    Domestic violence was reported by 30 percent of respondents and included various forms of abuse such as physical, emotional, economic, and sexual.

    Survivors often experienced profound consequences, including financial hardship, stress-related illness, damaged family relationships, and loss of employment. While some reported achieving fair outcomes, many others gave up on seeking justice due to a lack of trust in the system.

    The report further indicated that unresolved legal issues disproportionately affect residents of low-income urban communities. Common problems in these areas include land disputes, domestic abuse, and debt. In many instances, people turn to relatives, neighbours, or religious figures rather than law enforcement agencies or courts.

    While the formal justice system was generally viewed in a positive light, many respondents believed it to be designed primarily for legal professionals. Trust in the police was notably low compared to community and religious leaders, who were seen as more accessible.

    The report recommends increased investment in affordable, accessible, and timely legal services. It also calls for greater support for informal and community-based resolution mechanisms, as well as the continuous collection of people-centred justice data to inform evidence-based policymaking.

    A member of the governing council of the National Human Rights Commission, Mr Sunny Daniel, urged stakeholders to act swiftly on the report’s revelations.

    “This should serve as an alarm bell. What is released today shows we are still far away from where we desire to be. So let us go back and do more,” he said.

    The launch event was attended by dignitaries, including the Director General of the Legal Aid Council of Nigeria, Aliyu Abubakar; Director General of the Nigerian Law School, Professor Isa Hayatu Chiroma; representative of the Minister of Justice, Atanda Timilehin; and Executive Director of the CLEEN Foundation, Peter Maduoma.

  • Breaking the cycle of domestic violence

    Breaking the cycle of domestic violence

    • By Zayd Ibn Isah

    Sir: Nothing clearly depicts man’s inhumanity to his fellow human being like the video circulating on social media of a woman burned to death by her supposed husband in Abagana, Anambra State. According to news reports, tempers flared between the couple after the husband confronted his wife over allegations of infidelity. In the ensuing drama, the husband, Sunday Nwanna, poured petrol on his wife, and, like bushes set ablaze during Harmattan, set her on fire.

    How does one explain a man setting his beloved wife ablaze over an unproven allegation of adultery—not even catching her in the act, let alone on their matrimonial bed?

    Unfortunately, domestic violence has become as rampant as weeds in a neglected garden. Couples no longer have the decency to resolve their issues amicably. As a result, many matrimonial homes have become little more than boxing rings where partners who were once in love now fight to the bitter end. According to a 2022 report by the National Bureau of Statistics (NBS), 28% of women aged 15–49 in Nigeria have experienced physical violence at least once since the age of 15. Even more disturbing is the finding that over half of these women endured such violence from their current or former husbands or partners.

    It is not only women who suffer from domestic violence; men also find themselves at the receiving end of this culture of cruelty. However, male victimisation remains deeply underreported, as societal expectations often discourage men from admitting they have been abused. Two prominent cases point out the issue. The first is that of Maryam Sanda, who fatally stabbed her husband, Bilyaminu Bello, during a dispute over alleged infidelity. Her actions shocked the nation and ignited conversations about men as victims of domestic violence. Another high-profile case is that of Yewande Oyediran, who killed her husband, Lowo Oyediran, during an argument.

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    To break the cycle of domestic violence, victims should be encouraged to leave their marriages rather than being persuaded to endure the abuse with the hope that their partner will miraculously turn over a new leaf. Another way to break the cycle of domestic violence is to address the culture of undue tolerance or condonation. Many Nigerians and Africans, unfortunately, normalise abuse and make excuses for enduring it.

    Breaking this toxic culture requires a societal shift in mind-set. Families, communities, and religious institutions must emphasise the sanctity of life and the importance of self-worth over societal expectations. It’s crucial to challenge the narrative that enduring abuse is a virtue or a necessary sacrifice for the sake of marriage.

    Victims of domestic violence should not only be encouraged to leave abusive relationships but also be advised to seek legal redress in court instead of resorting to self-help. Speaking of self-help, the Emir of Kano and former CBN Governor, Sanusi Lamido Sanusi II, once said he told his daughters to retaliate whenever their husbands slapped them. While the Emir’s frustration and desire to protect his daughters from abuse is understandable, resorting to self-help often exacerbates the problem. Except there is an immediate threat to life requiring self-defence, the wiser course of action is to leave an abusive marriage and pursue legal redress. “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind,” as Mahatma Gandhi aptly said.

    Additionally, support systems, shelters, and counselling services for victims of domestic violence must be strengthened. Survivors need safe spaces where they can rebuild their lives without fear, judgment, or stigma. Providing resources and legal support will ensure that victims are empowered to make decisions that prioritize their safety and well-being. Ultimately, the malaise of faulty unions can be cured by constantly propagating the message that no marriage or relationship is worth losing one’s dignity, peace of mind, self-esteem and life. And even in the storm of bad relationships, we can always stretch our hands out to remind victims that their lives matter, and that they deserve all the love, care, understanding and support they can get.

    •Zayd Ibn Isah,

    lawcadet1@gmail.com

  • Adeleke urges residents to support State in tackling domestic violence

    Adeleke urges residents to support State in tackling domestic violence

    Osun State governor, Ademola Adeleke and the Daaru-r-Rahmat Society (DARMAT) have urged residents to join hands with his government to tackle cases of domestic violence in the state.

    Adeleke, speaking at the 15th anniversary of Daaru-r-Rahmat Society (DARMAT) noted that laws have been put in place to check domestic violence and other violence.

    The Osun State governor who was represented by his Special Assistant on Traditional Matters, Yakub Olalekan, said “You must be a good ambassador of what Prophet Mohammad (S.A.W) preached and taught. We must follow all the tenets of marriage so that we will not sin against Allah.

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    “I want to urge you to join hands together with my government to fight domestic violence in homes in the state.”

    The National Amir, DARMAT, Muali Olawale, explained the motive behind the celebration “For over 15 years, the community-driven organization DARMAT has become a pillar of unity and faith, growing from humble beginnings into a well-respected institution.”

    Earlier, a Chief Imam in Osun State, Sheikh Bolaji Owoyemi in his lecture titled ‘DARMAT Says No To Domestic Violence’ urged the Federal government and state governors to enact stringent laws that will make divorce between husband and wife difficult.

  • Stemming sexual, domestic violence through public outreach

    Stemming sexual, domestic violence through public outreach

    The last few months have been  busy for the Domestic and Sexual Violence Agency (DSVA) in Lagos as it embarked on a number of outreaches and campaigns against gender- based violence  in the nook and crannies of the state. ADEBISI ONANUGA reports strategies employed to stem the tide of the vice in the ember months

    The Lagos State Domestic and Sexual Violence Agency (DSVA) has evolved new approaches in its efforts to curb gender-based violence  in the state through behavioral mindset programmes. It also involves sensitising and training of all relevant stakeholders to infuse the SGBV message whilst moving towards a complete reversal of the menace from the society.

     The first of such awareness programmes tagged:  “Man Wey Sabi”  held at Unity market, Agbado.

    The Executive Secretary of the agency, Mrs. Titilola Vivour-Adeniyi, said the purpose was to address gender stereotypes in Lagos.

     She emphasised the collective responsibility to empower women, urging society, leaders, and residents to champion gender equality in their various domain.

     Mrs Vivour-Adeniyi  said the program shines a light on men’s pivotal roles in ending domestic and sexual violence in a pragmatic manner and promotes partnership in marriages. A lively cooking competition generously sponsored by Power Oil Nigeria Limited showcased culinary skills of the participants.

    The primary objective is to spread our message in a spirited manner, challenging stereotypes regarding men’s involvement in childcare and the essence of marriage partnership.

    The Baba-Oja of Unity market, Agbado, Prince Abiodun Kosoko appreciated the currentadministration of Governor Babajide Sanwo-Olu for ensuring that the society is conducive for both genders to thrive.

    Inter-generational conversations in Lagos Island

     The next stage of the awareness and enlightenment campaign  was given the theme: “Because You Have Experienced It, Don’t Become It”.  The one-day intergenerational conversation on triggers of violence in homes was taken to door steps of homes on Lagos Island and had many residents and stakeholders in attendance.

     The DSVA, while intensifying efforts to curb the menace of sexual and domestic violence in homes in the state and their relentless commitment to raising awareness against violence towards women and girls also emphasised the unique importance of the discussion to bridge the generational gap in understanding the triggers of violence within homes.

    Mrs Rhodes-Vivour, who was represented at the event by the Head of the Public Affairs Department, Mrs. Adejoke Ladenegan-Oginni, set the stage for a dialogue focused on fostering understanding and collaboration.

    This collaborative effort signified a step forward in fostering understanding and unity across generations in the fight against violence within homes.

    The Supervisor for ‘Ministry of Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation (WAPA), Mrs. Olayinka Bamidele, in a goodwill message, urged participants to persist in speaking up on issues related to sexual and gender-based violence (SGBV).

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    She urged parents to also respect the privacy of couples,  allow them to bond together and make decisions concerning their homes. She said third party interference often triggers violence in the homes.

     The collaborative partner for the event, VCARE for Development Foundation, represented by Mr. Peter Fujuno, affirmed their commitment to supporting DSVA in the fight against SGBV.

     At Ojuwoye Market, Mushin which hosted another version of the “Men Wey Sabi” edition,  the DSVA Executive  Secretary, Mrs Vivour-Adeniyi reaffirmed the agency’s dedication to eliminating gender-based violence through it’s initiative  aimed to change people’s behavioural mind sets, educating and training pertinent to  stakeholders and the Public.

    She said  that the programme was critically aimed at addressing gender stereotypes in Lagos, revealing that  statistics through research have shown that these stereotypes  are the resultant causes of Domestic Violence in various homes.

    She said the Ojuwoye Market, Mushin edition  was held so that the message  could be amplified to the nooks and crannies in Lagos.

    The Executive Secretary, who was represented by the Head Community Engagement,  Mr. Adewusi Damilare, further emphasised that it was crucial to empower  women to boost development and give them a voice as they also play significant impact in society.

     In order to mobilise support for gender equality, she laid credence to the need for collaborations from the public and private sector, elected leaders, and individuals to use their positions, offices, and platforms to amplify the SGBV message.

     Adewusi noted that: “Market Fiesta” increased awareness of men’s crucial roles in preventing sexual and domestic violence and sustaining marital partnership, while also rallying support for gender equality. He emphasised that the programme’s goal was to debunk myths regarding men’s involvement in the kitchen in opposition to gender stereotypes that place women in certain positions and the importance of cooperation in marriage as a vital source of mutual support in households.

    UNFPA day in Epe

    During its outreach in Epe, a walk was held to heighten sensitisation campaign on the 16 days of Activism against Violence against Women and Girls globally. The walk held  on Friday, December 8, 2023.

     Mrs. Vivour-Adeniyi, at the event said the agency  was  aligning with the global movement for the annual event. The 16 Days of Activism against violence against women and girls, with the theme “Women Arise, Light Up Campaign” was in partnership with UNFPA to organise a transformative sensitisation walk in Ayetoro Market, Epe.

     Vivour-Adeniyi said the objective of the  event was to address and combat gender-based violence, fostering a community-wide commitment to speak up against these atrocities.

     She stated that, the sensitisation walk with the theme “Women Arise, Light Up Campaign.” also aimed at  illuminating and empowering  the entire communities of Epe, urging them to raise their voices against all forms of abuse, sexual and gender-based violence (SGBV).

     “The sensitisation walk in Epe is sacrosanct and represents a significant stride towards building safer and more informed communities, and as the agency eagerly anticipates further partnerships and initiatives in the pursuit of a violence-free society, whilst remaining  resolute in our mission and looks forward to the continued support of all stakeholders in this noble cause.” Vivour-Adeniyi said.

     Participants in the sensitisation walk  included market women, the youth, representatives from the Ministry of Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation (WAPA), Ministry of Health, Child Protection Network, the Police force, Lagos State Traffic Management Authority (LASTMA), Lagos Neighborhood Safety Corps (LNSC), and the DSVA team, gathered at Ayetoro market. This diverse representation symbolised a united front against SGBV..

    The walk commenced from Ayetoro market through Ayetoro town up to the Fish Market in Epe with  notable interaction at the fish market where the Baba Loja – Elijah Jacob Babatunde and Iyaloja- Alhaja Adeola Giwa not only endorsed but passionately voiced support for the cause, emphasising the urgency of combating SGBV.

     The walk stopped at the Local Government Secretariat, where participants were brought together for a closing session.

    Badagry  Intergenerational Conversations

    The DSVA, in continuation of the sensitisation on the 16 Days of Activism against violence against women and girls had a one-day Intergenerational  Conversation on triggers of violence in the homes in Badagry.

    Mrs Vivour-Adeniyi, in her  welcome address said the theme – “Because You Have Experience It, Don’t Become It”,  was specifically chosen to address re-occurring issues which contribute to triggers for violence in the home.

     She informed the gathering that marriages require amongst others, mutual respect, understanding,  communication, respected boundaries and cooperation, and partnership to achieve peace which were the Key takeaways for participants in in the program.

     The Executive Secretary who was represented by the Head of the Public Affairs Department,  Mrs. AdeJoke Ladenegan-Oginni stressed that the event which was first held during the DSVA  Awareness Month gave a platform to leverage and further amplify the message of the  intergenerational conversation on triggers of violence in the home.

    The Vice Chairman Badagry Local Governmentt, Mrs. Elizabeth Pedetin-Kappoin her goodwill message thanked the state government and the agency for organising the event in Badagry.  She noted that all forms of abuse affect victims psychologically and emotionally and the resultant effect evident in unruly children and a violent society.

    Ensuring peaceful homes, safer society

     Also, Supervisor,  WAPA,  Alhaja Risikat Abimbola Padonu- Hassan said women and girls are being protected from all forms of abuse and should endeavour to ensure they dwell harmoniously with their spouses by respecting and cooperating with them.  She said eradication of triggers in the home would result in a peaceful home and a safer society.

     The Panelists and the Moderator, Ann Onyechefula of the  Programs Department, DSVA informed participants that data gathered by the agency revealed that third-party interference, lack of communication, lack of sexual satisfaction, financial dependency, unrealistic expectations, and infidelity have been identified as triggers contributing to domestic violence and intimate partner violence.

    “These conflicts usually result in violence in homes bearing in mind that the family is the first unit of socialisation, to tackle violence in society we must find ways to resolve conflicts in the home front because if not curbed they eventually lead to violence in the society at large”

     She said the objectives for organising the program were to highlight the significance of Intergenerational Conversations on triggers of violence in the home particularly between inlaws and or other extended family  members of the family by fostering understanding, promoting effective communication, and sharing valuable insights that create more harmonious and fulfilling family dynamics by offering solutions to actualise a peaceful society devoid of strife”.

     At the event of the Badagry event, panelists were drawn from the different age groups and generations to participate in the symposium amongst whom were,  Mrs. Oluwakemi Bello,  Miss Temi Arowojolu,  Mr.  Taiwo Amusa, and Mr. Nathaniel Ayodeji.

    Damilare Adewusi spoke on the services the agency renders free of charge that can be accessed,  courtesy of the state government.

    Intergenerational

    conversations at Ikorodu

     Mrs  Vivour-Adeniyi,  in her  welcome address at the intergenerational conversations at Ikorodu said the theme – “Because You Have Experience It, Don’t Become It”,  was specifically chosen to address reoccurring issues which contribute to triggers for violence in the home.

    She also told the gathering that marriages requires amongst others, mutual respect, understanding,  communication, respected boundaries and cooperations and partnership to achieve peace which were the Key take-aways from the event.

    Vivour-Adeniyi who was represented by the Head Public Affairs Department,  Mrs. AdeJoke Ladenegan- Oginni stressed that the event gave a platform to leverage on and to further amplify the message of the  Intergenerational Conversation on triggers of violence in the home.

    Parents to pay more attention to their children

     The Chairman Ikorodu Local Government,   Adesina Wasiu Ayodeji who was represented by the Secretary to the Local Government,   Afinnih Abdullateef during his goodwill message, thanked the state goverment and the agency for organising the event in Ikorodu,  He said all forms of abuse affect victims psychologically or emotionally as this could trigger mental disability or suicide.

    He urged on parents to pay more attention to their children and wards and urged residents to report cases whoever the situation arises

    Report cases timely

     Ms Kemi Babatunde who represented VCARE for Development Foundation;  in a  good will message, encouraged the Ikorodu residents to take ample opportunity of the DSVA services by reporting cases timely.  She said the eradication of triggers in the home would result in a peaceful home and safer society.

    Triggers of domestic, sexual violence

    Head- Clinical Pschology department,   Dr. Olive Oluwagbemileke, said data gathered by the agency  revealed that third-party interference, lack of communication, lack of sexual satisfaction, financial dependency, unrealistic expectations, and infidelity have been identified as triggers contributing to domestic violence and intimate partner violence.

    “These conflicts usually results to violence in homes bearing in mind that the family is the first unit if socialization, to tackle violence in the society we must find ways to resolve conflicts in the home front because if not curbed it eventually leads to violence in the society at large”

    She said the objectives were to highlight the significance of Intergenerational Conversations on triggers of violence in the home particularly between inlaws and or other extended family  members of the family by fostering understanding, promoting effective communication, and sharing valuable insights that

    create more harmonious and fulfilling family dynamics”.

    At the event, panelists were drawn from the different Age Groups and generations to

    participate in the symposium amongst who were,  Mrs. Omoyemi Folarin,  Mr. James Odey,  Mr.  Taiwo Amusa,  Mr. Nathaniel Ayodeji,  Ms. Zipporah Atoyebi and Mrs. Olive Oluwagbemileke as Moderator

    Mrs Oluwakemi Bello , at all the events of the agency, gave an overview of SGBV and the services available at the Lagos DSVA that residents can access free of charge.  She told participants to call the toll-free line 08000-333-333 or visit the Novel House office at Plot 3, Otunba Jobi Fele Way,  Alausa Ikeja to report cases.

  • Domestic violence reaching epidemic proportions

    About a fortnight ago, Abibat, a sweet  dedicated Catholic and a practising nurse, not her  real name, is hospitalised in the same hospital she worked. Initially,  the concerned family members and friends were put in the dark as to why she was in the hospital battling for her life.

    It did not make sense. Some spoke to her days earlier and she sounded very healthy.

    The truth eventually came out when neighbours let the proverbial cat out of the bag when their were serious protests by their home. Youths were threatening to lynch her husband.  They told whoever cared to listen the our sweet Abibat drank bleach in a bid to escape her husband’s verbal and physical abuse.

    This information came as a horrible shock to all that heard, except the neighbours, ofcourse.

    Church members told how happy and close they always appeared in church.  They regularly wore same clothes.  They made all singles wish they were married.  They were always cited as examples of how a couple should appear.  How ironical!

    To think that their home was a living hell where on several occasions neighbours had been called upon to settle their differences and in most cases literally drag Abibat away from her abusive husband.

    Incidentally,  her husband, also a very active person in church,  did not in anyway appear to be an abuser.

    Okada riders told how her husband would oftentimes monitor her positions on the bike. Slapping or hitting her, alleging that she was sitting too close to the biker. He complained that her breasts were too close to the biker.

    We were also informed that whenever she came home from work,  how he would chase her out alleging that she had been sleeping around.

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    Thankfully,  Abibat did not die from her suicide attempt.  Her husband is in custody as I write this piece and Abibat is recovering fast. She confided in me through the phone that she wanted to end her life because she did not want to witness the shame of facing her parents and siblings.  She further told me how she defied her wealthy family and married her husband because she felt she was in love.

    She said for the two years they had been married, he had continued to beat her almost on a daily basis.  She alleged that she was promiscuous.  She regrets her suicide attempt, prays to recover and return to her parents’ home.

    According to her, the reason she chose death initially was to avoid her parents knowing.  She said now that they had known,  the marriage was automatically over.

    All I could muster to her was a few words.  Marriage is not and has never been a  do-or-die affair.

    Staying in an abusive relationship is not worth it. On a very regular basis,  women in abusive relationships often opts to die in it rather than face the humiliation of living a single life and facing public scrutiny.  Well,  I would rather be single than die in an abusive relationship.

    Domestic violence is defined as a violent or aggressive behaviour within the home, typically involving the violent abuse of a spouse or partner.  It is also called Intimate Partner Violence (IPV).

    Intimate partner violence is a serious preventable public health problem that affects millions  globally.

    Domestic abuse is a pattern of behaviour used by one partner to maintain power and control over another partner in an intimate relationship.

    It does not discriminate.  Anyone of any race , age , sexual orientation,  religion or gender can be a victim or a perpetrator of domestic violence.  It can happen to people who are married or living together or dating. It affects people of all socio-economic backgrounds.  If you find yourself in an abusive relationship remember the following:

    *You are not to blame for being battered or mistreated.

    * You are not to blame for your partner’s abusive behaviour.

    *You deserve better.  You deserve to be treated with respect.

    * You deserve a safe and happy life.

    *Your children deserve a safe and better life.

    * You are not alone.  Please get help.

    It is only natural that you want to help your partner.  You may think you are the only one who understands him or that it is your responsibility to fix his problems.  The truth is that by staying and accepting repeated abuse,  you are reinforcing and enabling the behaviour.  Instead of helping your abuser , you are perpetrating the problem.

  • ‘Aladi is a campaign against rape and domestic violence’

    ALADI, a short social movie which is currently showing on YouTube, has been described as a campaign against rape and domestic violence.

    This was disclosed by the movie’s producer, Prosper Ogwa, an actor, filmmaker and also the founder of the END Campaign.

    “ALADI is a short film on rape and domestic violence, shot to sensitize the society on this social crisis and the need to break the silence,” Ogwa said.

    “This short film was produced to promote the objective of END Campaign, a social crusade created to put an end to all forms of social crisis from stigmatization, to rape, drug trafficking, terrorism, child abuse and all other forms of crisis.

    “Our tools in achieving a crisis free society are work of art, a unique strategic way to create maximum awareness in the most informative way, reaching more people with craft and stories that touch and teach. We are set to use photography, short films, documentary, poetry and other forms of art to promote the END #ICANSHARE Campaign.”

    The short film starred Queen Adakole Stephen, Oreoluwa Eniobanke Brown, Grace Otoaye and others.

  • ‘Lack of empowerment, poverty fanning domestic violence’

    Lack of empowerment, fear of who will take care of the children and hunger are some of the reasons abused women stay silent and endure violence and other forms of abuse in relationships, as against reporting to the appropriate authorities.

    This much was revealed at a recent one-day round-table discussion on Domestic Violence Law of Lagos State organised for community women’s associations by Project Alert.

    Guest speaker, Oluwakemi Bello of the Lagos State Domestic and Sexual Violence Response Team (DSVRT) informed the women leaders drawn largely from the Agege and Ikosi areas of Lagos State that the department was established to expose and fight everything that constitutes violence against women and girls.

    She informed that the law against domestic violence is very strong in Lagos, having been signed into law since 2007. At the moment, she said the department works directly with the governor to provide holistic response to issues of rape, domestic violence and child abuse, and urged the women leaders to intimate their members to take advantage of it.

    In the event of silence by the victim, Bello disclosed that everybody is a mandatory reporter, adding that the department’s slogan is, “When you see something, say something.”

    The three-part discussion dealt with: “Understanding Domestic Violence: Myths and facts,” presented by Nsini Udonta; the second part handled by Olubukola Olowoyo explained the Domestic Violence Law in plain language, while the third part explained the role of police as well as its commitment and accessibility to the people.

    Speaking, Executive Director, Project Alert, Josephine Effah-Chukwuma said the gathering was to appraise the women with the Domestic Violence Law, to enable them deal with the increasingly ‘epidemic’ situation.

  • Lagos tackles domestic violence against women

    In commemoration of this year’s 16 days of activism to end violence against women, Lagos State government through the Ministry of Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation has organised a 2018 WAPA connect conference tagged Fostering Harmonious living through reforms; Strengthening of social services and substantive equality among women and Yoruba girls.

    Speaking at the conference held at Agidingbi, Lagos,

    the Commissioner for Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation, Dr Lola Akande, said the conference was aimed at the advancement of women’s right, fostering domestic harmony and tackling the menace of gender-based violence among other burning issues among women.

    While lamenting that the root of most of the hostilities leading to dishonouring and violence in homes are the two challenges of gender discrimination and poor access of women and young girls opportunities that bring out the best in them, Akande pointed out that the current administration through the ministry has made significant impact through critical intervention programmes to end violence against women. “Some of these actions include marital dispute mediations forceful (teen) child marriage reserve and disruption of buttered women, among others,” she said.

     

  • Lagos tackles domestic against women

    The Lagos State government is determined to end domestic violence against women. Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation Commissioner Dr Lola Akande said yesterday.

    She spoke at a conference to end violence against women in Agidingbi, Ikeja, which she said was aimed at advancing women’s rights, fostering domestic harmony and tackling gender-based violence, among other.

    She said: “In commemoration of this year’s 16 days of activism to end violence against women, the government, through the Ministry of Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation, is organising WAPA Connect

    Akande most of the hostilities leading to violence at homes were gender discrimination and poor access of women and young girls to the opportunities that bring out the best in them, she said the government, through her ministry, had made impact through intervention programmes to end violence against women.

    “Some of these actions include marital dispute mediation, forceful (teenage) child marriage, among others,” she said.

    A member of the House of Assembly, Funmilayo Tejuosho, said Lagosians should understand that the Domestic Violence Bill was meant to keep marriages intact and prevent violence.