Tag: life

  • LIFE HAS TAUGHT ME TO BE A LONER

    LIFE HAS TAUGHT ME TO BE A LONER

    Maverick entertainer, Charles Oputa, popularly known as Charly Boy, speaks to JANE KOLADE about his life, and times as an entertainer, his upbringing as a judge’s son, his bad boy image, his friendships in the industry and lots more.

    As an old friend of the ‘Rainmaker’ (Majek Fashek), can you please tell us when you first met him?   

    I can’t pinpoint the exact date, but I remember that it was during the era of the defunct Polygram Records, Tabansi Records on in the premises of a record company somewhere in Oregun sometime in 1982. I had been seeing him around, anyway, we spoke briefly, and I took a liking to him. At that time, I was living in my village. During my time in the village, I remember my father calling me and telling me that he had seen Majek in Lagos, and I was wondering how on earth my father came across Majek.

    So, one day I was at home when my father came on a visit, and showed up with Majek, and that was how Majek ended up staying with me for over a year, and worked in my studio as a studio/session executive.  So, Majek and I go way back. One night, I was in my house resting, and there was no power, and my generator had packed up, when my wife and I heard the sound of a lovely voice playing on the radio, and I wondered how that could be as there was no power. So I rushed downstairs to confirm what was happening, and got there to find that it was Majek. Come to think of it, a lot of people have passed through my hands, a lot of people have gone on to become great; I am proud to say that Majek was one of them.

    But coming back to Majek, fame comes with a price, not a lot of us can handle fame. Fame comes with a price, and some people are more able to manage it than others. Most artistes are usually not business inclined, they do not know how to manage their careers, and I happen to fall into that category as well.  But in all of that, I prefer to see the good in people. I believe that we all need discipline to manage our lives, and some people need to apply it in their lives. I thank God for my upbringing; we had loads of values pumped into us growing up. I also believe that artistes need to reinvent themselves, because I believe that artistes have expiry dates, hence the need to manage their images so that they can remain relevant. But for some of us, we just can’t manage that.

    And for some of us who unfortunately have picked the wrong habits, like drinking, drugs whatever; and are not quick enough to know that it can’t help us, it can be a problem, and so many things come to play.  So, again, I say not everyone can handle fame. There are people who do not like to be talked about, especially when the media does not represent them in a proper light, they get upset. But for others; people like me, I really don’t care as I already know who I am.

    So when people call me names that are not me, why should I worry?  I have confidence in myself.  I grew up with a healthy sense of confidence, so nothing fazes me, and whether or not they understand my actions is none of my business. Words like that are like water on a rock to me. I can’t be bothered about people who can’t see beyond what they see to see me, and the profound things that I do, because being Charly Boy goes beyond the rings, or my weird dressing, or crazy philosophy. It is about how I have added value to my environment, and to the people I have come across. It is about how I achieved what I have, and how I had to take the route I took to get there.

    Meanwhile, as an adult, after I had finished what I believed I owed my old man; to get a good education. I have never enjoyed being under anybody’s shadow, and I was not going to do that as an adult, so when I got back from the States I moved to the village.

    We are different kinds of people, and I think that for Majek, what happened to him was most unfortunate, because he was such a promising young man. I used to rank him up there with the greats. But I don’t know what happened. I sum it up that some of us find it hard to handle fame. Sometimes it takes away the person you were before the fame. I pray for the best for him. At a time, I had great hopes for him to be a great star, but I don’t know what happened along the line. Some of us have great prospects but things can happen to derail one.

    But as a father figure in the industry, our duty is just to give advice. Because there is no road I have not been, I experimented with all those stuff. So you can’t say because a person is struggling with something, it makes him a bad person. Having said that, we have to be careful of the company we keep. There are people who are in our lives that are not interested in our well being; friends who do not add value to you, but keep sapping energy, creativity from you, or the goodness in you. That is why I am very conscious of who I move with. I am practically a loner. Life has taught me to be a loner. I have a few friends, friends in the real sense of the word, but not more than two or three of them. We talk to each other.

    Oftentimes, people say a junkie goes to rehab, when they come back, the challenge is not falling off the wagon, because they went back to their former environment. Majek has been to rehab three times before this last stint, how are we sure of this?

    There is no guarantee in life. Everything depends on the individual. Let me start with myself. I gave up smoking for almost eight years, and I don’t drink at all as I have never been used to alcohol.  I quit smoking for such a long time I couldn’t even believe it. And addiction has many faces, there are people who are addicted to alcohol, drugs, stealing; kleptomania, is a form of addiction, and are bad for you. But after I lost my father who was my best friend, I found myself back into smoking and I have not been able to quit since last year, after giving it up for almost eight years. I came back as though I want to make up for all the years I missed.

    These things are funny, you never can tell what can trip one up, and so I don’t pass judgment on people. I don’t like the fact that I am addicted to nicotine, why am I still doing it? The same applies to Majek, but I have told myself that I am going to quit. If I could quit cold turkey the first time, I can do it again. I am getting to a point where I have to freshen my breath and all that for me to be happy, because I don’t like nicotine trailing me around everywhere I go.

    Back to Majek, we can do everything; all the cheer, all the love for people going through their form of addiction; whether to alcohol, drugs or whatever, but 80% of him getting better depends on his willpower. The right kind of atmosphere is another thing, but all we can do is pray. Sometimes, I feel I’m a hypocrite because I’m an addict too, for, some of us, our addictions are not visible, but they are there anyway. It is all about willpower, there is no guarantee whether he will clean up, or remain clean. It depends on how far he is willing to go to fight it. We all have our demons. I know for instance that smoking is not good and that is why I have to ask your permission to smoke in your presence, and have to use things to kill the smell.

    At the time you met, and during the time he spent with you, did he drink or smoke?

    Not at all. I was a bad boy and I never used to smoke around him. I smoked weed, dank and all but I didn’t use to around him because that was the impression I had about him. He was clean, a clean spirit.

    So you studied in the US, and returned home, to the village. Why Oguta?

    After my youth service, even before I returned home, there was a job waiting for me with Mobil, after studying Mass Communication. But I said I was not interested, and my dad blew a fuse. I come from a background where you finish school and get into line, get a job, advance in the job, and all that. Then for the first time in the history of the Oputa family, I refused to toe the line, it was scandalous. After that resolve, the kind of insults, and yabis my dad gave me, saying I was throwing my life away.

    I never stopped hearing his mouth, he was then made a Supreme Court judge and moved to Lagos. I said “Thank God.” At least, I now had a roof to myself. I was not willing to depend on anyone, I wanted to find my own way, and do my own thing. And I paid the price for that, The kind suffer when I see no be small. We were middle class, and those were the days Nigeria was good, you lived off your salary. So there I was, after a year, everything dried up, nobody was coming because there were better studios around. If you know the location of Oguta, it is out of the way. From studio, I started running a buka where I sold food. Things got so bad that my wife decided that she would go back to America, work and send money home. By this time, we had had our first child together, a son. All the while I was trying to find my feet, I was embarrassed to get back to my parents that things were hard, or ask for help; that was the last thing I was willing to do.

    Whenever I had to come to Lagos, I came on a bus, and on attachment seat for that matter. During one of the trips I made to Lagos, I met Tina Onwudiwe. I met her when I was still struggling, and we just fell in love with each other. Nothing intimate like that, but she could see and understand where I was coming from, and why I was willing to make the sacrifices I was making, hoping I would find my way. Tina was also of the same spirit and that was how we clicked.

    During those times I visited, or she visited, she would urge me to leave Oguta, and move to Lagos saying, “You will die here o!”It went on, and Tina had such crazy ideas, once we went to a newspaper house, and Tina said that we were getting married.  And they asked “Where?” She was crazy like that, but she opened my eyes to all the shenanigans in show business. How they do their things, the hype, and all that. When I started, I started with the Sissy look, which is where the being gay came from. I heard questions like, “How can a man be wearing lipstick, weave-on and all that?” Then she said, “Let us go for a more rugged look.” She introduced me to biking, the Mohawk look, and all. She said I had a good body “so I want people to see you”, and that was how it started. But what really did it was when she told me that she had a record deal for me, saying, “Yes, you must move to Lagos.” Not knowing that Tina had already paid two years rent on an apartment for me at Gbagada. That was how she lured me to Lagos. And that was how I was able to break away from Oguta.

    At what point did your father begin to see the sense of your career choice as an entertainment?

    From the beginning, he continually complained about my dress choice, saying “But you can wear suit now. Why must you be deceiving people? This is not the environment, they won’t understand this.” That was his problem; one was tempted to get them to understand.

    And I told him that it was not about people. He wouldn’t understand, I didn’t have problems with my mother, but my dad just couldn’t bear that fact. Sometimes, he would ask, “Show me somebody in this profession that is living a good life, is it that your mentor, Fela?” That was his problem. Tina might be dead, but I owe everything to her, and I cannot tell my story without referring to her. Because I know how she impacted my life. One day, she went to blast my father saying, “I have seen something in your son that I don’t think you have seen.” You can imagine a total stranger coming to tell you about your own child. My father was shocked, but my mother welcomed her. I didn’t ask her to do that. I wasn’t even aware she knew where they were living.

    One day, I was driving home with my father, somewhere around Tinubu square, after putting out my first album, Nwata Miss, and was promoting my second album, 1990, it was a hit. And people were milling around, and he kept asking, “How did these people know you?” It was then he started to realise the impact of my choice. And so when he continued about my dressing, I told him, “If you don’t want me to come to your house, no problem. I am no longer in school expecting you to pay my school fees, as I am an adult.”  But not long after all that, he started to understand.

    Prior to that, I felt that he had no love for me, and as a child my dad would beat the shit out of me. Things took a dramatic turn after his retirement, and he lived in my house in Abuja. And that was when we would sit and have conversations, and we came to understand each other better. He became my best friend, making me understand that everything he did was in our best interests. Now as a father, I am finding my own with my children. They won’t go through what I went through because for my kids and I, you won’t know who is the father, and who is the kid. Having said that, my old man is a great man, I learnt quite a lot from him, especially humility, and contentment.

    Would you say that your upbringing contributed in making you who you are, even though you went your own way?

    I was raised catholic; attended catechism, was an altar boy. At one point, I wanted to be a priest. That was what they did to me. I usually tell people that you can either run away from your past, because there are things in your past that terrify you, or make you so unhappy that you never let go. Or, you run to your past, because there are things in your past that you value that make you what you are at present. And when everything goes around you that is all you know. I have always seen my family, and my father and mother together, stealing kisses, holding hands. So that explains my remaining married to one woman for over thirty years.

    In spite of your wild image?

    I have always had a sense of family; my family comes first, which is why I am attached to my family.  I don’t joke around there. I was always reminded, “This is who you are. This name …” I did’t appreciate it at the time, telling my dad things like, “You are too old, too old school.” So we must teach our kids, talk to them, they may not appreciate it at that time, but with time, what you are saying will sink into their mind. My father died, he was not a politician, or a minister, but I saw the encomiums. The funeral was like a carnival, even though I staged part of that. But I was proud that he was my father. He didn’t have anything, I had more money than he did, but the kind of respect, and how he was revered, and that is exactly how I want to go out.

    Not to be known as a money bag. Those are the things I got from my background, and I have been holding on to. People who know me know that most of the things about Charly Boy are a bit contrived, because like I said, artistes have expiry dates. But like a drink that has a long life span, they change the package, but the content is still the same. So all my shenanigans were part of the showbiz, and in public interest, and people who were not deep enough could not see it. They never asked themselves the right questions because they had preconceived notions. But I have always been mentoring, inspiring, so many people passed through my hands; Patrick Doyle, Gloria Anozie, and the likes.

    Funny enough, before my father passed away, he would have been my manager if he had been younger because he became in the thick of what I was doing. This was a ninety-something-year-old man who would get on my bike with me, took walks with me. And I would tease him that, “But you never believed in me.” And he would say he did not see all of that at the time. So it is important not to be judgmental in our dealings with people.

    It is very interesting to hear that you were friends with Fela. When did you meet him?

    I did not know Fela close on at first. I knew him from afar from the seventies. Until I got back from the States, then I was always going to visit him. I remember the last time he got back from prison, my dad called me saying, “Your friend is out o! What are you doing? Are you going to go and see him?” That was good news, and I had to save money to come to Lagos. He was really a wild and crazy one. He takes the cake. After all he went through; he was able to stand all the intimidation, all the beatings. He was the one who told me, “Whatever path you take through personal conviction, be it right or wrong, and stick to it!”

    Could you paint a picture in words as to the kind of person he was? Your perception of him?

    Like a flamingo, like a rainbow. Fela was also a gentleman, not a lot of people know that. I know that a lot of things he did were an act.

     Could it have been part of the show business?

    It was. I knew the other side. I was one of the few artistes Fela went to his house. In fact, he opened my house; the one that Tina got in Gbagada. I remember the day he came to open my house, Fela sat at the table, with Femi, and Yeni, and he was using his fork and knife. Sebi he sang, “I no be gentleman at all” That is a side of Fela not many people know. The conversation was not the typical Fela conversation, and he did not smoke weed in my house. He drank wine, seeing him in that atmosphere, he stood out. It was not a Fela most people knew, he was a gentleman.

    And the fact that he honoured me. He spent the whole day, at the end of the day I had to beg him saying, “Fela, a beg, I wan sleep”, before he finally left. I used to visit him at the shrine; those were good times, and I thank God for that. I thank God for all those memories. When he died, I gave him my own twenty-two gun salute. I have never seen a man like him; he had so much for the people that he stood up on their behalf. Regardless of all else, he was no angel, we all have our faults. I have my own faults as well, and I choose to see the good in people. Who are we to judge? That is why I choose not to criticise people. That is why Jesus Christ came, and who says that if you are gay you are a bad person? As far as I am concerned, it is the quality of whom you are that matters.

    How have you been able to stay married to one woman for over thirty years?   

    This is actually my third marriage, and I remember that at some point she asked if I was going to marry her, and if I was not, she would go, so I did. But then marriage goes beyond compatibility. No one is compatible, you are marrying a total stranger, but you have to learn to deal with incompatibility. You made a commitment to that person, and you have to stick to it.

    My friends say I am lucky to have her, and I might say she is lucky to have me. The truth, however, is that nobody has it all. Come to think of it, my wife has only three of the ten qualities I want in a woman. Marriage is about the right kind of management, equal respect, and understanding. After all, at one point after I married my wife, I no fit feed am, she had to go and make money to feed us. And afterwards, when I feel I have now arrived, I feel I can do without her because I have arrived. Arrived to where? Arrive to disarrive.

  • Nike Oshinowo’s  new lease of life

    Nike Oshinowo’s new lease of life

    The mystery around marriages is the unpredictability of its end. The blissful outset of a marriage does not necessarily guarantee that it would be an enduring one. Former beauty queen, Nike Oshinowo, has since found that marriages don’t always turn out as romantic as authors often paint them. Her crashed marriage to Dr. Tunde Soleye no doubt threw her into emotional inertia as she was hurt like she had never known.

    But she has bounced back to life and placed the past firmly where it belongs. She is currently full of life, exhuming a kind of exuberance that many cannot help but admire.  Although she has gone ahead to concentrate on her social life, it is apparent that the unfortunate end of her marriage left a scar on her heart that time has not been able to erase.

    But Nike is not a quitter. Her talk show is thriving and she is getting by just fine.

  • FirstBank introduces Life is a Movie

    FirstBank introduces Life is a Movie

    •Best customer movie to be used as Television commercial

    FirstBank has brought new concept into its marketing campaign. Tagged Life is a Movie, the campaign gives customers of the bank an opportunity to screen their daily life experiences, upload it on the bank’s social media.

    Giving people to chose or cast their dramatic personae a protagonist or antagonist; or make the life movie a thriller or comedy, the bank said its giving everyone, be it its customers or prospect “to participate in a real-time blockbuster titled “Life is a Movie” featuring our customers.”

    According to the bank, the campaign is meant to actualise the bank’s You First brand promise which was launched last year when the bank hit 120 years of existence in Nigeria and changed its way of banking to meet the need of the market.

    “The Bank is again living up to its brand promise to put YOU first, through a series of consumer experience. Moments in our lives play out like scenes from a movie which could fit into the genres of romance, adventure, comedy and definitely drama. Whatever this moment is, FirstBank is requesting you to share this moment with us so we can begin to see the world from our customers’ point of view,” says an industry analyst.

    With the ‘Life is a Movie Campaign’, the bank said customers can share their life experiences, exciting moments or  adventures capture it with their video camera, send or upload the video recordings their Facebook page and tag FirstBank’s Facebook page, www.facebook.com/firstbankofnigeria; Instagram Page and tag FirstBank’s Instagram Page – www.instagram.com/firstbanknigeria using the hashtag#LifeisaMovie. However, the bank’s creative manager said the best entries will be pulled together to make the first ever customer focused television commercial in Nigeria starring YOU.

    The Bank’s Head of Corporate Communication, Folake Ani-Mumuney, said FirstBank has chosen its customers to run its new ‘YOU FIRST’ advertising campaign in movie style.

    “Having the faces of our customers used as part of our advertising campaign represents not only what we do for our customers, but what our customers do with us.With this campaign, we want you, our customers assured that even when life feels like a movie, FirstBank will be  part of the script with lifestyle-fit products and services you need to make sure your life follows the script you planned” she stated .

    This campaign demonstrates how the Bank puts its customers first. Whether it is getting them to do something new, putting them in line for something special or taking their business to the next level, FirstBank would support its customers, and ensure that they enjoy the different moments of their lives. Having been around for over 120 years, FirstBank has become the trusted and dependable partner throughout the journey of life – experiencing many moments right along with its customers and thus, playing a major role in the movie of their lives.

    According to her, the campaign demonstrates FirstBank’s readiness to stand behind every dream, every new experience, and every accomplishment and much more to better serve customers and truly put them first.

  • DOHAL: Life, hope from a bishop’s daughter’s death

    DOHAL: Life, hope from a bishop’s daughter’s death

    When Dorcas Oke, the only daughter of Ibadan-based preacher, Bishop Wale Oke, died in 2001, it broke the hearts of many. But, little did they know that her death would bring life to many children in distress n hopeless circumstances. BISI OLADELE and SIKIRU AKINOLA write that Dorcas’ death, which brought pains to her parents, has given hope to children in Ibadan and surrounding communities. This charitable work is done through the Dorcas Hope Alive Initiative (DOHAL).

    Hers was a death lamented by many. Dorcas Oke, the only daughter of popular Ibadan-based preacher, Bishop Wale Oke died 14 years ago of complications from adulterated drugs. Her death rendered her parents distressed. Some of her father’s followers wept while family members were distraught. For years, some who knew Dorcas as a good, innocent girl, grieved.

    DOHAL providing succour to vulnerable children
    DOHAL providing succour to vulnerable children

    But bearing in mind that the girl has gone for good, Bishop Oke and his wife Victoria decided to immortalise their ‘angel’ with a charity organisation christened Dorcas Hope Alive Initiative (DOHAL). That was two years after Dorcas’ death.

    The late Miss Oke was a 300-level student of Engineering at the University of Lagos before her death. The 17-year-old had typhoid fever and was given drugs, which, unknown to medics and her parents, were adulterated.

    Dorcas, who was the first of the two children in the family, was described by friends and acquaintances as brilliant, gentle and futuristic.

    Since October 28, 2003 when DOHAL was established, the foundation has given hope to hundreds of grown-up children who had been consigned to the backside of life by poverty, sickness and lack of useful information.

    According to the one of the directors of the Dorcas Oke Hope Alive Initiative (DOHAL), the initiative is a non-governmental organisation (NGO) working in the field of health and development, contributing to the prevention of untimely death among youth, children and women in Nigeria and Africa at large. We largely focus on orphan and vulnerable children (OVC).

    Using initiatives tailored towards specific challenges in the society, the NGO helps to prevent deaths among rural and urban children and women, even as it offers poverty eradication programmes as well as relief materials to victims of disasters.

    The programmes include the Death Prevention Programme (DPP), Youth Emancipation and Empowerment Programme (YEEP), Poverty Eradication Programme (PEP), Rural Development and Empowerment Programme (RUDEP) and Disaster Relief Programme (DRP).

    Through these programmes, many youths in communities and villages in and around Ibadan, the Oyo State capital, are being helped with empowerment tools, offered information on prevention of diseases while hoodlums are being rehabilitated to lead rewarding life.

    For instance, under the Death Prevention Programme, several deaths have been prevented, particularly for rural dwellers through the foundation’s information, education and communication materials on preventable health issues such as HIV and AIDS, sexually-transmitted diseases, malaria, Hepatitis B, yellow fever and tuberculosis.

    The NGO also sponsors treatment of minor ailments in local communities as well as partners with health agencies on life-saving programmes such as immunisation and tests. It also facilitates education on nutrition and environmental safety.

    Summarising the objectives of the project, DOHAL Executive Director, Mrs. Oluwafunmilayo Ajibulu said: “In pursuance of the Death Prevention Programme, DOHAL embarks on series of school outreach as part of its missions of providing information, education and counseling on preventable health concerns, using integrated and sustainable approach. Issues discussed include reproductive health, dangers of pre-marital sex, personal hygiene, child abuse, developing a wholesome personality and other preventable heath concerns.”

    Through this programme, diseases and deaths have been prevented in homes and communities.

    For the YEEP, DOHAL organises career counseling and seminars, offers scholarship for indigent students from poor homes as well as skill/vocational and entrepreneurial development and training. It also embarks on mentoring and motivational talks.

    Under YEEP, several out-of-school youths of both genders are identified and trained in various vocations to help them to earn decent living. For instance, the organisation has arranged several trainings in barbing for boys and hair dressing for girls. So far, over 1,000 out-of-school children have benefitted from this programme, thereby restoring hope to many homes.

    DOHAL’s Disaster Relief Programme (DRP) has assisted many victims of flood and other natural disasters. For instance, relief materials, including food, clothes and building materials were distributed to Ibadan flood victims in 2012 while cash was also donated for the rehabilitation of one Mrs. Hafsat Abiade who was a survivor of electricity shock in Apata area of Ibadan in 2012.

    Through this programme, DOHAL has also donated clothes, food, drugs, building materials and cash to victims of Jos communal crisis in 2010. The programme also covers prison and market outreach through which items are donated to prisoners in Agodi Prison, Ibadan. Counseling and medical outreach were organised for traders at the Bola Ige International Market, Gbagi, Ibadan.

    Under its Rural Development and Empowerment Programme, villages, including Ikija, Adeosun, Oyainu and Sanusi (in Ibadan) have benefitted from welfare packages donated by DOHAL. They included provision of potable water, sustainable sanitation facilities, access to micro-financing, promotion of community health and awareness on civil matters.

    The organisation also identifies vulnerable children and link them with orphanages.

    Through these and many more, DOHAL, which was borne out of a young girl’s death, has become a source of hope and life for many youths. Besides, the NGO instituted an annual lecture where salient issues affecting youths and women are discussed by experts with the aim of creating awareness on such dangerous issues.

    Explaining the reason for some of the programmes, Bishop Oke said many deaths in Nigeria are preventable, including that of Dorcas. He urged the society to rise up and take necessary measures based on the firm belief that life is sacred.

    In his speech at this year’s lecture at the weekend, Bishop Oke said DOHAL has been affecting and changing lives positively around the country.

    His words: “Over the past 12 years of its existence, DOHAL, inspired by the experience of the church of Christ, has been positively affecting and changing lives around the nation, one life at a time. God certainly knows how to turn tragedy to triumph. He knows how to turn sorrow to joy. We give Him all the glory due to Him; specifically for all He has done with DOHAL over the past 12 years.”

    •Medical personnel examining a child
    •Medical personnel examining a child

    Oke said the NGO believes that everybody has the right to life, right to happiness and enjoyment and the right to maximum fulfilment. “We depend on public-spirited individuals to give and participate in our programmes and to make sure that the children of Africa do not die needlessly like Dorcas did.”

    He further explained that though the organisation was set up as part of the “Mercy Ministry” of the Sword of the Spirit Ministries, it offers help to the needy irrespective of their religion, gender or background.

    The Vice-President, Prof. Yemi Osinbajo delivered a lecture entitled “Child Abuse and the Challenges of the African Child” at the event.

    According to Osinbajo, children in African cultures are regarded as gifts from God. “We have not found that society where a child is a curse except in an ignorant society; when we started having twins and triplets. The birth of children is heralded with joy. Why is it that these same children whose birth were celebrated with fanfare made to suffer from the society?” he queried.

    Osinbajo, who was represented by former Lagos State Attorney-General and Commissioner for Justice, Mr. Ade Ipaye, said Nigeria passed its Child Rights Act (CRA) in 2003. “For now, 24 states have passed the child rights act into law. Lagos and Akwa-Ibom have been enforcing the law. All the states that have pass this act into law adopt the age of 18 as age of consent.”

    Continuing, he said: “When you beat a child in a way that will cause permanent damage to him or her, you have violated the CRA. The age below 18 is when we instill character, ideas and attitude into the child. Anything she learns constitutes what is going to form part of her adult life.

    “Tribal marks, tattoos, child trafficking, child labour, betrothal, child molestation, child prostitution, depriving a child access to education and enlistment of children into the armed forces are against child rights act.

    “Some of these child abuses are not always intentional but the law does not know that. If you circumcise a girl-child, you have committed an offence under the law.

    “Ignorance and poverty can be the reason but they are not valid excuses. It is an offence for you to beat a child just because he or she is not serious. It is a crime under the law. This abuse goes beyond physical assault; it is affecting some internally and you cannot notice it. Some have been exposed to some criminal activities that cannot make them useful to themselves again.

    “Forty per cent of Africans live in slums. You can have a family of seven in a room. In this kind of situation, there is the likelihood of child abuse. Majority of African children living in slums have either of his parents. HIV and AIDS kills women and children mostly in the slums. There is no security of lives and properties there.

    “More than 2,000 children have been sold into slavery in sub-Sahara Africa. Only 57 per cent of African children are enrolled in primary school and only three per cent completes it,” he noted.

    He further explained that there are some religious interpretations to child abuse. “Some will say their religion is against some things which are against the law. The only way out of this is for them to be educated. The law frowns at some religious and traditional interpretations. You cannot do what you like to your children. You cannot beat a child to coma.

    “Some cultural and religious perspectives need to be changed. We have the law. How we enforce it should be paramount in our minds.

    “Child marriage is still rife in Nigeria. Thirty per cent of our children between the ages of 18 and 24 are married before adulthood. Poverty is a problem that we must do all we can to tackle. Tackling it will go a long way in curbing child abuse. Let us stop insurgency also. When a child loses a parent, it affects the child in many ways.

    “We will begin to make impact when we set up agencies to tackle this menace. Let us report and the appropriate quarters will react to it. Institutions must be put in place for people to lay their complaints.

    “To children, it is good for them to speak up. There are cultures which forbid children from speaking against injustice. Children must have knowledge of what constitutes abuse. Education will give them the confidence to speak up. Though the responsibility is of government but it cannot do it alone. Education is a solution to many problems because an enlightened child will not die in silence. We must fight against all social vices,” he advised.

  • Re: Life’s unpredictable trajectory

    IN our youthful days, we live life to the fullest with so much self-assurance, we follow the path we choose with so much zeal and gusto and so much faith in the future. For a lot of people, they have no regrets whatsoever and are forever thankful for the wise or should we say lucky choices they made. While some have followed the wrong paths and retraced their steps, some just keep following the wrong paths and end up becoming the victim at every given time. What could be the cause? Fate, super-natural powers, perpetual folly or lack of good counsel? The list could be endless. Bimpe’s story was published last week. The path she chose to follow has left her in so much pain. Bimpe, who is from an upper class background, had the world laid at her feet and the opportunity to continue living a life of ease and great wealth as long as she lives settled for men she had to “raise.” Why? Because she grew up watching her father treat her mother who was from a lower class with disrespect and could not imagine a man doing such to her. She’s been through two marriages. One was real and the other a sham which brought her beautiful world crashing into smithereens. Her story is indeed a very pathetic one. Some readers sent in their suggestions and pieces of advice and of course did not leave out some whipping.

    Dear Bimpe,

    Allowing your parents’ marriage to overshadow your life to the extent that you married a man for the reason you did is wrong. Secondly, any man that will start making a pass at you and urging you to leave your marriage for him has no sense of decency, decorum and definitely doesn’t have your interest at heart. Thirdly, did you carry your daughter along? You have been wronged but you have also wronged others. And before I forget, it is high time children realised that their parents’ marriage is none of their business. You only owe them prayers and good wishes to get over their own weaknesses while you deal with yours. Or else, you will experience what the woman here has just experienced.

    Nkechi

    This is sooo sad and my heart keeps breaking at every word. Bimpe’s a woman with a golden heart but fell into the hands of wrong and ungrateful men. This is so typical of Nigerian men. They are so full of lies. They tell their sweet nothings because of what they want to get from you. Morenikeji shouldn’t have done that to her mum after all she’s done for her. I can only pray to God to strengthen her, restore all that she’s lost and give her good health. She shouldn’t focus on any man right now but on her kids. Start life afresh and make positive changes. May God help us from these wolves called men.

    Tutu

    Hello Temi,

    Bimpe should know that only she can wake herself up from the nightmare, no one can be in charge of her happiness except her. I believe strongly that Ropo will not exit her from the house. As for her daughter, she should let her be and focus on finding happiness from her other children. I believe that the daughter will come to her senses later. She should pray towards it. She should also focus her energy in doing things that will help her recover from the financial strain the two men have caused her.

    Uzoekwe Chika

    Dear Bimpe,

    To start with, I congratulate you for being a champion and the heroine in the story. You played a prominent role in the lives of those who brought your world crashing. And without you, they would never be where they are today. True, we all have to bear the consequences of our actions and the path we choose to follow. You followed the path you thought would be best for your emotional well-being. The only problem here is that you never mentioned God in your journey through life. From your perception of life, God has never really been deeply involved. God needs your attention now. There is no way you can fulfill your divine destiny by shutting God out of your life. His plans are usually different from ours and we must carefully and patiently look out for the path He has charted for us to follow otherwise we end up in great trouble. Your main focus should have been God’s ultimate plan for you and not what your mother experienced in her marriage.

    It’s excruciatingly painful to be let down by people you love with all your heart even after ending up penniless for their sakes. And even a greater tragedy wallowing in the pain they have caused you. Now, you have to talk to your inner man and be strong. You need to help yourself; no one can help you with that. Believe me, others have experienced worse and bounced back seven times higher. You cannot be an exception. It’s all in your hands. Forgive and forget them all if you want to be vindicated by God and have the last laugh over this issue.

    “Acquaint now thyself with him, and be at peace: thereby good shall come unto thee. Receive, I pray thee, the law from his mouth, and lay up his words in thine heart. Yea, the Almighty shall be thy defence, and thou shalt have plenty of silver. For then shalt thou have thy delight in the Almighty, and shalt lift up thy face unto God. Thou shalt make thy prayer unto him, and he shall hear thee, and thou shalt pay thy vows. Thou shalt also decree a thing, and it shall be established unto thee: and the light shall shine upon thy ways.”

    Job 22:21, 22, 25-28

    You are a conqueror. So, act your role, live your role and enjoy life. Happy new life!

    Pastor Temilolu

  • Ese Falae set to  embrace life again

    Ese Falae set to embrace life again

    No matter how hard a storm blows and no matter how destructive it gets, it always recedes to leave behind a calm scenario. The storm is finally over for Ese, widow of late Commissioner for Culture and Tourism in Ondo State, Deji Falae, and life is gradually returning to normal.

    Although the healing power of time is still working its magic on her, Ese has embraced life again in the bid to give her kids the happiness they deserve. She has taken the destiny of her family in her hands as she and her children are demanding N245.5 million from Associated Airlines and the Nigerian Civil Aviation Authority (NCAA) over the death of their bread winner in a plane crash.

    The widow, Ese Lynn Falae, and her three children say their demand represents compensation for the earnings Mr. Deji Falae would have made over the next 15 years, less living expenses, cash discount and the statutory limit of one hundred thousand dollars.

    Her late husband, Deji Falae, was a son of one of Nigeria’s former Finance Minister, Olu Falae. Apart from the late Falae’s widow, the other plaintiffs are Ayomide Falae, a 15-year old student at Day Waterman College in Abeokuta; Omowonuola Falae, a 13-year-old girl; and Oreoluwa Falae, a seven-year-old pupil at Corona Schools in Lagos.

    Deji Falae died at the age of 42 on October 3, 2013 in an aircraft owned by Associated Airline, which crashed while conveying the remains of former Governor Olusegun Agagu from Lagos to Akure, the Ondo State capital, for burial. At the time of his death, he was the Commissioner for Culture and Tourism in Ondo State.

  • How my police father, disabled mum shaped my life , by Edo lawmaker

    How my police father, disabled mum shaped my life , by Edo lawmaker

     Hon Osaigbovo Iyoha is a first-time lawmaker in the Edo States House of Assembly. He won election on the platform of the All Progressives Congress (APC) to represent Oredo East Constituency. In this interview with Osagie Otabor, the lawmaker reveals how the determination to succeed, in spite of his humble background, spurred his efforts.

    How do you combine business with politics?

    It is not easy. It is only in Nigeria and in some other countries that politics has become a full time job. It is bad for it to be so. Ask somebody here who he is, he will tell you, I am a politician. I think politics should be part-time. We should make politics less attractive. That is what drives stealing and other vices. It will make people to know that public service is an avenue to serve. People should have time for their business as well as being involved actively in politics.

    What was your growing up like?

    It was not easy growing up. I was not born with a silver spoon. I am the son of a policeman and a disabled tailor. They did their best to make sure I had a good education. I grew up in Benin City. I sold things on Lagos Street to survive. A lot of people had it more difficult than I did. It was not bread and butter always. My parents had to bend their backs to ensure I got educated. The secondary school I went to, the Immaculate Conception College, was one of the best in old Bendel State. For me to get admission into ICC then, being from a modest background, means my parents meant well.

    How did you make the breakthrough in business?

    As every young man, while in secondary school, you aspire to be a doctor, lawyer or an engineer. I attended former Edo State University now Ambrose Alli University. I actually wanted to be an Electrical Engineer but I was given Mechanical Engineer. At that time, we were under the illusion that after school, jobs would be waiting for us. Growing up in a difficult time, I knew that I had to find a way to survive.

    After completing my National Youth Service Corps, I went to live with my sister in Lagos. Luckily, I was around where real estate was growing – the Badagry area real estate was growing. I became an agent and turned into a super-agent. I moved to Ajah axis where they call the fastest growing real estate area in Africa and I became a broker for most of the communities. That was what we did for 10 years. In 2007, we moved to Bayelsa. The attraction was real estate. But after three years, I was lucky to be close to people through which we started doing construction jobs. It was from there I moved into politics.

    How did you feel when you made your first millions?

    I am not a millionaire, but the reward for hard work is success. You will realise that some people work harder than you but they have not been fortunate. It is only through God we can achieve more. Making money is like arithmetic; when you are able to be at the right place at the right time and take it when opportunities call. When you project and work towards your dream, you will get there. You also need to be truthful. Morally, I was taught to be modest by my parents. No matter what happens, nobody knows tomorrow. When I look at my background compared to where I am now, I never believed it. If you have the desire and energy to work at something, make sure you have every time and not taken by the vices. Once you keep the focus, you will achieve your goals.

    What pushed you to run for political office?

    I have been a private businessman all the while. I got interested in politics because of what Oshiomhole said the day he declared to run for governorship. He said governance is a serious business that should not be left for mediocre. That was where the drive came from. We needed to start building the system and to make good laws. That was the drive and I believed (that) I have a lot of goodwill.

    How has it been this past three months?

    It has been a very interesting time at the Assembly. We are learning on the job. We are not a rich state. We are doing something but you know we are barely three months in office.

    Do you think your party will make headway in 2016?

    What you sow is what you reap. If you ask people on the streets and market women they will tell you the difference between the PDP and APC. I was surprised people were congratulating Jonathan for conceding defeat. He did not have a choice because the people wanted change. The thing is to impact on the people because the day of reckoning will come. I always tell people they should vote us out if we do not perform. The only reason people voted APC was when they compared what APC governors were doing in Lagos and Edo to other PDP controlled states, they saw the difference.

    Go to Delta State, you will not believe it is an oil rich state. Go to PDP states, they have not done anything. We have the momentum in APC. It is no longer business as usual in this country because a new sheriff is in town. Everything in this country was programmed to fail because certain individuals want to reap from the system before it collapses. We will not lose focus on what we have for the people. Very soon, everything is going to fall in place. The problem we have in this country is corruption but things have started falling into place. There is improvement in power. Policemen now conduct themselves a little better. I travelled and was surprised to see a new immigration service at work. Where several immigration officers used to stay, you find only two and there was no queue. I was initially worried. We got in the baggage room and all the baggage were ready. Before now, you will wait for two hours and be asked series of questions just to be extorted. Things are falling into place in this country.

    What is view on the search for Oshiomhole’s successor by Dr. Ogbemudia?

    Only the people have the power to install a successor. When he finds his successor, we are still going to determined who to succeed Oshiomhole.

     

     

  • New lease of life for Omowunmi Akinnifesi

    New lease of life for Omowunmi Akinnifesi

    Omowunmi Akinnifesi vanished from the social scene just when it seemed that she was about to become one of the most sophisticated and enduring ladies on the scene. The ex-beauty queen-turned-businesswoman and Lagos State’s Ambassador for the Environment seems to have opted for a low profile lifestyle.

    So conspicuous has been her absence that the social circuit is now abuzz with speculations on her whereabouts. In 2005, Akinnifesi was crowned the Most Beautiful Girl in Nigeria at the age of 18, making her eligible to represent Nigeria at the Miss World pageant in China the same year.

    At the global beauty contest, she shone brightly and also engaged in tree planting for the Chinese government. Today, Omowunmi, currently the CEO of Elle Poise, a public relations and usher-hiring outfit, has disappeared from the social radar to the dismay of her fans and high society.

    While she reigned as Nigeria’s beauty queen, no A-list event was complete without her as she dazzled all and sundry with her modish attires and stunning gait on the red carpet. As would be expected, her sudden disappearance from the social scene has given rise to rumours and speculations.

  • Bimbo Okoya opts for single’s life

    Bimbo Okoya opts for single’s life

    One of the stories contained in the Bible is that of Gomar, who was divinely instructed not to divorce his wife in spite of her filthy ways. But the kind of dedication Gomar exhibited towards marriage seems to have since died with his era. These days, lovebirds throw in the towel at the slightest provocation.

    Although Bimbo Okoya has good reasons for refusing to salvage her marriage to Liberian-born Prince Urey before it hit the rocks, the daughter of business mogul and owner of Eleganza Group of Companies, Alhaji Rasaq Akanni Okoya, is yet to allow any other man into her life. She has chosen to stay away from the complications that accompany love affairs.

  • Unsafe food threatens life

    Unsafe food threatens life

    Unsafe food poses a threat to life, the National Agency for Food and Drug Administration and Control (NAFDAC) has said.

    According to its Director-General (DG), Dr Paul Orhii, the danger must be curbed to preserve life.

    Orhii spoke at a workshop in Lagos to celebrate the maiden edition of the national food safety week in Nigeria. The theme was: How safe is your food? From farm to plate, make food safe”.

    His words: “Globally, a significant number of people die yearly as a result of food borne illnesses they get from the food they consume. Infants, children, expectant mothers, the elderly and those with an underlying illness are particularly vulnerable.”

    NAFDAC, he said, created the department of Food Safety and Applied Nutrition (FSAN) to curb the menace of unsafe food in the country. Moreover, there was an intense capacity building after the creation of the department.

    “This was done in order to entrench professionalism, expertise and to further strengthen NAFDAC’s capacity in robust food safety regulatory activities,” he said

    He said the agency has streamlined regulatory processes to minimise official procedure with modified guidelines for micro, cottage, small and Medium Enterprises (MSME’s), adding:  “This will lead to tremendous increase in the number of such food businesses and establishments in the country.”

    Orhii continued: “The objectives of this food safety week are to prevent, reduce and report food safety issues as well as strengthening the national food control systems. This is also to awaken the consciousness of multiple stakeholders on the importance of making the food consumed safe. Many of the food safety issues we face domestically are also shared throughout the world because diseases and pathogens do not respect national borders

    “There are many reasons to look into the ways we protect public health through food production systems and specifically food safety systems.”

    Permanent Secretary, Federal Ministry of Health, Linus Awute, who was represented by the coordinating head, Chuku Fubara, said the safety of food is an overlooked problem.

    According to him, the presence of harmful substances such as germs in food, brings about food borne illness and possible outbreak of epidermic.

    He said: “It is unfortunate that regional and national scandals are usually what stimulate public awareness.”

    These challenges, Awute said, are obviously not without adverse effects on public health indices of the country, “as well as the economic imbalance caused by the rejection of Nigeria agricultural produce by the international communities”.

    The ministry, he said, is considering creating a dedicated code line for food safety as promised by the immediate former minister of health.