YOU can accuse Nigerians of harbouring a large army of tricksters, pranksters and fraudsters to whom corruption, bad leadership, poor followership and poverty mean nothing. But you cannot assert that our people are stricken by lack of ingratitude. No.
Nigerians surely know how to reward good deeds. Otherwise, how do you explain the series of awards going on now? As usual, “Editorial Notebook” will not be left out of this yearly ritual. So, here is to all those compatriots of ours who stood out in 2015.
He has been lampooned for running the economy aground, mishandling the war against Boko Haram and lacking the courage to fight corruption, a charge amplified by no other person but the man to whom he was an adopted son. But, fair is fair – Dr Goodluck Ebele Azikiwe Jonathan did well by relinquishing power when he saw that it was all over. A typical African big man would have preferred to shed some blood, smash some heads and scream that he would never surrender a mandate given to him freely by millions of Nigerians. But, many have asked: had he any other choice? Well, that is neither here nor there. The reality is, the Jonathan presidency has become history. A former teacher, he has since hit the lecture circuit, pontificating about democracy, rule of law, good governance and all such theories. Take a bow, Dr Jonathan, you are the Man of the Year.
When a fire broke out at a popular market in Ado-Ekiti, Governor Ayo Fayose led firemen to fight it. After the smoke had cleared and the stalls lay in ruins, he ordered in the bulldozer, promising that from the ruins of that market, another, which will be a worthy edifice, will spring up. His compassion provoked questions on the mysterious fire.
His Excellency recently suborned the House of Assembly to hold a special session where he was proclaimed “leader of the opposition”, following his verbal assaults on President Muhammadu Buhari and those newspaper advertorials in which he played the necromancer, predicting gloom and doom.
But of all the governor’s stunts of epical Balotellian proportions, none seems to have matched his outlandish presentation of the 2016 budget. The video is all over the place. Fayose strolls into the Assembly in a Polo shirt. The lawmakers sit there, looking serious like pupils awaiting the headmaster’s visit. Some have their hands clasped onto their chests. Others are restless, like a patient on a dentist’s chair. Then, the governor sounds off about the state being his “catchment area” , raises up the document and asks four times: “Those who want this budget passed speedily, say yes!”. As most of the lawmakers watch the bizarre scene, the gallery erupts: “Yeah!.” His Excellency is not done. He goes on: “Those who doesn’t (sic) want this budget passed speedily, say ‘yeah!.” All is quiet. Fayose then reaches out for the gavel, which he brought, and bangs the podium, yelling: “The ayes have it!.” He turns to the Speaker and bows sharply. “Mr Speaker, I hereby present the budget.” Can you beat that?
For combining so well the dual role of the executive and the legislature, for being so compassionate to his people and for delivering regularly those diatribes against the President even when nobody replies him, Fayose is Governor of the Year.
Considering the row that greeted his enthronement as Senate president, Dr Bukola Saraki should snatch away the Senator of the Year Award. The truth, however, is that many of our distinguished senators are qualified to claim this much disputed title. There is Senator Ibn Na’Allah, the architect of the infamous “Bill for an act to prohibit frivolous petitions and other matters connected therewith”, otherwise known as “Anti-social Media Bill”. Senator Ike Ekweremadu – against all odds – became Deputy Senate President by what many have called the betrayal of principle and alleged forgery of the rules, which is still the subject of a police investigation. Dino Melaye’s exuberance attained its full potentiality as he was either playing Dr Saraki’s bodyguard or making frivolous allegations, always yelling like a hungry hyena. None of them, I regret to say, got the trophy.
Step forward Senator Kashamu Buruji. For long, there has been the argument that he is a fugitive running away from justice in the United States where he has been invited to clear his name of drug charges. Buruji, who has been accused of changing his name at will, insists that he has no case to answer and that he is not, in fact, the fellow being sought after by the law enforcement agents. The suspect, if there was any, he says, was his brother who had died. But, the National Drug Law Enforcement Agency (NDLEA) would not listen. Its men stormed Buruji’s home and attempted to seize him. He locked himself in and vowed to commit suicide should the agents persist in their battle to catch him . Then, the courts stepped in and pulled the brakes on his planned extradition.
Distractions over, Buruji then joined his colleagues to begin the arduous and intellectually challenging exertion of lawmaking for the peace and progress of the country. Unknown to us all, the National Association of Nigerian Students (NANS) – Ah! NANS, those who didn’t understand the game were screaming – was watching his progress. In no time, Buruji was called up to be garlanded as “Golden Man of the Year”. NANS President Tijani Usman said it was in recognition of the senator’s “untiring, exemplary and compassionate leadership style”.
A few days ago, Buruji issued advertorials titled “Corruption must die if Nigeria must live”, urging Nigerians to support President Buhari’s anti-corruption battle. Besides, he said: “The only money I have ever received outside my legitimate business earnings is the one (N30m) given to all senatorial candidates by my party during the last election. The senator’s critics shouted: Where was the gift from? Who handed it over?
From a drug suspect threatened with extradition, his home bombarded in a commando-style as if he was an armed robbery kingpin, his seat threatened by a tribunal judgment, which the Court of Appeal overturned and now an anti-corruption crusader, Buruji’s is, indeed, an “uncommon transformation” (apology to former Akwa Ibom Governor Godswill Akpabio). Take a bow, Buruji, Senator of the Year.
Senator Akpabio’s Sport Utility Vehicle (SUV) hit a United States Embassy vehicle in Abuja. After a few days in an Abuja hospital, the distinguished senator flew overseas for medical help. Many were wondering why he didn’t check into the multi-billion naira world-class hospital he built in Akwa Ibom State during those years of “uncommon transformation” . That, no doubt, was the Accident of the Year.
Even outside office, Senator Musiliu Obanikoro seems to be grabbing the headlines more than he did when he was Foreign minister – he was also Defence minister, you may wish to recall. His role in the Ekiti and Osun governorship elections has become a subject of a massive probe by the military. He has, besides, been mentioned in the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission’s (EFCC’s) investigation of the alleged diversion of $2.1b arms cash. While all the noise was going on, Obanikoro (Koro, for short or Koro Ibo– ballot- a nickname he earned as a result of his yet unproven but widely acclaimed prowess at winning elections) issued a statement that he was not on the run but in a United States university, studying History.
Instead of praising his courage– in the search for knowledge, many have been scorning him. They ask derisively: “History; what kind of history? Is he planning to manipulate history?” The fact is that, unlike some other former government officials who checked into hospitals –former PDP chair Haliru Bello was on wheel chair on Tuesday when he was hurled before a judge – when issues were raised about their tenure, Obanikoro has simply gone into the academia for more knowledge. For his love for scholarship, Obanikoro is Student of the Year.
This year’s awards are, regrettably, slightly tinged with tragedy. The revered Ooni of Ife, Oba Okunade Sijuwade, died overseas, setting off a bitter–expensive, many claim– struggle for the throne. Former Kogi State Governor Abubakar Audu, who was set to be proclaimed winner of the November 21 governorship election, died suddenly. The Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC), in a manner that exhibited so much dependence and less independence, declared the election inconclusive and ordered a supplementary poll in some polling units. Of all the deaths, however, the most controversial remains that of former Bayelsa Governor D.S.P. Alamieyeseigha, also known as Alams.
He was said to be in a Dubai hospital when the news broke that he was to be extradited to London for alleged money laundering. He had years earlier escaped from Britain in circumstances that provoked a wide range of conjectural elucidations, among which was that he was decked out in a woman’s clothings. Alams jumped off his hospital bed, hopped onto a plane and flew home. Not long after, he died. Now many are saying cynically that he was merely proclaimed dead, an unproven assertion that has rendered his death inconclusive. When is death not the final, the end and the closing of all things?
The row has refused to die. For this, Alamieyeseigha’s death wins Controversy of the Year.
In the business sector, what would have qualified for the Deal of the Year – billionaire Aliko Dangote threatening to buy English Premier League giants Arsenal – did not take off. Mobile operator MTN was hit with a $5.2b fine. After negotiations, the fine was reduced to $3.4b. As we all looked forward to the company signing the cheque, it suddenly made a detour and elected to go to court where the matter remains pending. So, no Deal of the Year Award.
Now, a short break. More awards are on the way. Don’t go away.
