I saw an interview of a debutante actress in The Nation‘s Flair segment last Sunday; when the lady was asked who her favorite musician was, she said Jim Reeves! Leading me to take the above lyrics for this title, believing many generations can connect to the sentiment.
Yep, gone are the days! Certainly gone in Nigeria, OYINKAN MEDUBI described it as WEIRD, the sight of a great big thanksgiving service for ex-Governor James Ibori on his safe return from: JAIL, I only saw the pictures, but she watched it and said the preachers (imagine) likened him to one of the Apostles of old. Probably back from an ‘apostolic’ trip to prison.
Only in Nigeria.
These Political Pastors I call them, forget the biblical admonishment to men not to complain when they are punished and imprisoned for their own offences not to talk complaining when harassed and jailed for preaching the gospel.
Yes the anti-corruption war is reaching international dimensions and is a battle to be fought indeed. But for the battle to be fought AND WON, the deep-seated and generational causes of corruption have to be uprooted from the foundation level, or we will never ever get there.
The emasculation of the youth – the mass of the population will keep violent social interaction and corruption ongoing and increasing.
Not addressing Governments very deliberate attempt to increase the gap between the rich government fat cats and the ordinary workers is the breeding ground for corruption.
Paying most slave wages for work done, and selected others receiving jumbo pay and emoluments with all privileges – these are some of the causes of corruption.
According to Sam Adeyemi*, it is not smartness to:
(a) Make money by stealing it.
(b) Make money but not doing any work to have it.
But NIGERIA has always preached these 2 messages to its citizens – fueling generational cycles of corruption!
Yes, Nigeria needs to fight Corruption. But we’ve got to fight Corruption (the Symptoms) AS WELL AS Corruption (the Causes). That’s my Take.
- Sam Adeyemi, Pay the Price for the Prize. Success Power CRBC TV. Tuesday, 21stFebruary.
HOW DO MEN DETERMINE A BABY’S SEX?
This title is paraphrasing one by Doctor SUN, whose column in Sunday sun a couple of weeks back was a great big eye-opener. Dr. Ogwo (real name) had said that his previous article had virtually opened a Pandora’s Box unto him over determining the sex of a child. He expressed shock that the questions he was bombarded with were not coming from his “Great Great Grandfathers” or people of the “Stone age”, but that people from this digital age were writing and asking him: ‘Doc, you say men are responsible for the sex of their child, how?’ even ‘Doc – please text me how my wife can give birth to a male child.
Meaning this discourse on male child syndrome needs as much awareness, as there can be even till now.
There is a certain Ibo man who is a financier of one of the political parties.
One time, he held a child dedication that tipped the scales in dedication ceremonies. With at least 10 serving governors in attendance, in addition to many other high ranking officials present, the attendance was indeed a roll call of the who is who from across the country. Indeed, all the high society magazines (Ovation et al) were on hand to cover the event.
A first thought would be that the man and his wife might have been married for 21 years or something, and this was their first child.
But no, that was their 8th (eighth) child being dedicated. The first seven children were All Girls!
Yep, it was the search for a Male Child that had made this man send his wife to the delivery room year after year, until his quest was actualized. Then and only then were the drums rolled out, and then dignitaries invited round.
But I wonder, do these people ever think how their other children must feel? It must be awful for a child, to know for certain that She’s not wanted.
And that is one of the direct consequences of the male child syndrome in families.
All other children are made to feel inferior, unwanted; an unpleasant arrival. This baggage they have to carry and go through life with; all the while watching as the one who is the ‘real’ child is treated like an egg. The male child in that home is the apple of the parents’ eyes – the other children of the home are mere occupants.
Sometimes, I sit and imagine the trauma of the childhood of girls in this kind of home. It would seem as if an abandoned child or an orphan were better off! Because in that case, they would then be adopted, and made to feel wanted and a part of a family unit.
Oh indeed, food, clothing and education would be provided for the girls in these circumstances but I daresay that if food were provided in abundance, and yet you were made to feel unwanted, you would never even want to eat of the sweetmeats!
Meddlesome in-laws on the husbands’ side also play a big role in cementing the male child syndrome in the society.
Oftentimes, rather than appreciate the new addition to their family, they go taunting the mother of the child, asking why SHE is unable to “produce” a Male child. The really bad ones, especially the bad mothers-in-law encourage their sons to go into immorality, in order to have a son by all means possible.
They actively encourage their sons to keep concubines, to commit adultery and polygamy and put many other women in the family way in a bid to produce a male child and heir. After all, it’s the boy who will inherit the family name: I just wonder – WHAT NAME IS THIS?!
A look into the belief system of those with this syndrome will reveal that they are actually religious people. Because most often, the celebration of the arrival of the sought after son is preceded by a church dedication or by some form of religious naming ceremony.
But there is no man who does not know that he can neither create himself, nor create another man!
A child is a gift from God. THAT LITTLE GIRL is a gift from God.
Importantly, also that little came from the MAN, it is only the man that possesses the chromosomes of both sexes, male and female, in his reproductive organs. Yet it is the same man, the father, that would make a home totally uncomfortable for everyone because of his inordinate desire for a male child. That is playing God. And that, no man can do. It is time for a rethink.
Doctor Sun ends his piece with this take: “Every man should know that he is responsible for the sex of his babies. If he blames his wife again,… Holy Ghost…! Remain medically guided.”
MY POSTSCRIPT
Mr. Ifeanyi Ubah and his wife forged ahead with babymaking, still searching for a second son. THEIR NINTH CHILD WAS A GIRL.