The Nation Newspaper

Category: Family forum

  • How to improve on your marriage (4)

    Dear Reader,

    I hope you are fully set for the Christmas celebration by making your home a lively one. It’s a great privilege to share God’s Word with you today, being a day to the celebration of the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ. Have a Merry Christmas in advance!

    This week, I wish to unveil to you How to Provoke Joy and Enjoy a Lively Home during this Christmas season.

    I want you to know that God has designed this season to bring joy to individual lives, homes and marriages all over the world. This joy cannot be traced to man but to God, the source of true joy.

    There are times when one gets excited over some things, but this usually does not bring joy that lasts. Some people have the opportunity to experience joy only at Christmas. Thank God for the month of December, and for Christmas, and the joyful spirit of the season that comes into the home, but this does not only have to be for one season.

    Joy can be made to become an everyday experience in the family, simply by creating the right atmosphere that guarantees a never-ending joy. The right atmosphere for joy to dwell is a Godly one. When your marriage is one that is of God, and everyone at home is born again, then it is easy for a godly atmosphere to be created.

    God’s Word says: Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore (Psalms 16:11). God makes His presence only available in the homes of His children. The “pleasures” spoken about in the Scripture above, are all those things that will naturally provoke joy in the home. Most of these things are not just simple needs, but things that money may not necessarily buy. Some of them are divine health, protection, provisions, peace, sweet sleep, promotions, success, etc.

    There is a popular song that goes: ‘When Jesus is in a family; happy, happy home…’ This is true! When your home enjoys an atmosphere filled with the presence of God, it will indeed be an ever happy home. That shall be your own portion in Jesus’ name!

    Godly atmosphere is one that is consciously created by the individuals in the home. It involves having the fear of God in the home, and practically obeying His commandments concerning covenant responsibilities by the husband and the wife.

    Therefore, let the husband obey God’s commandment, by carrying out his covenant responsibility of loving his wife. The love responsibility is the instrument a man uses to make his wife a glorious woman, without spot or wrinkle, or any of such things.

    Therefore, the making of any wife is in the hands of her husband. If you want to enjoy a lively home as a husband, then, love your wife as your own body! Love is the price you pay for a lively home, while total submission is what is required of the wife to reciprocate her husband’s love to sustain a lively home, even after Christmas.

    The presence of God in a home means lasting peace in a family. When there is peace, there will be unity in the home and when there is unity, the blessings of God just keep flowing. These blessings include  promotion, success in your various endeavours, health, prosperity, divine direction, etc.

    A home that lacks the presence of God will lack the pleasures and joy that His presence carries. That home will suffer setbacks through lack of peace, stagnation, unfruitfulness, sorrow, hardship, sickness, disunity and lack of joy. The presence of God that emanates from a godly atmosphere is a must, for the family that wants its joy to be sustained after Christmas!

    The right foundation for a godly atmosphere that commands the presence of God and gives lasting peace, and joy everlasting for a lively family, is the one that is connected to His only begotten Son. You can become God’s child by accepting Jesus Christ into your life. That is what it means to be born again. If you are ready to become born again, please say this prayer: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • How to improve on your marriage (3)

    Dear Reader,

    Peace and blessings be multiplied to you in this month of the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ. In my first lesson, I told you that marriage is a miracle. Last week, I looked at marriage covenant responsibilities.

    This week, I want you to Beware Of Divorce! Enjoying a loving home is God’s utmost desire for you and your spouse this Christmas and forever. That was His design from the beginning of creation.

    Divorce can be likened to marital amputation. It causes a lot of grief, pains, and wounds that only God can heal. Even when a wound heals, the scar remains, and in most cases, for life.  Give no place to divorce. Remember, prevention is said to be better than cure. When there is a challenge in your home, divorce should not be the first option that comes to mind. Rather, it is important to first identify and analyse the challenge.

    In the beginning of the institution of marriage, divorce was not a part of the original plan, and was never supposed to be. The Word of God says: Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh (Genesis 2:24). Note the word “Man shall leave, cleave and become one flesh”.

    God hates putting away! The Word of God says: For the Lord, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away (Malachi 2:16). What God says He hates, you should hate too. If you move close to any divorcee, you will observe that they themselves go through a lot of pains and agonies, and their children go through turmoil, and devastation. God views husband and wife as being bounded together in a permanent marriage relationship, and nothing should be allowed to put them apart.

    My husband used to say, “To be slow and sure is better than to be fast and foolish”. My husband and I courted for six years.  Throughout that time, we did a proper study with all sincerity of each other’s character, vision and goals. If you are not contemplating divorce, then there is no need to rush into marriage. Take your time; be sure of what you are getting into. If it is a living family you desire, prepare yourself for it and enter into it with God’s backing and certainty.

    Divorce is not as easy as it sounds, because it is not only limited to legally ending a marriage, but putting death where life once was. For those of you about getting married or yet to be married, be very careful.

    In case you are reading this article right now and you are considering divorce, and you think there is no way out. Just hold it! Who knows, this might be the reason God gave you the opportunity of reading a material like this. If only you will accept and follow God’s master plan, your story will change for the better!

    Or are you already divorced? Do not allow a sense of condemnation to overwhelm and destroy your colourful future. God can still perform His wonders in your life. Do you believe a miracle can still take place in your life and family to bring about a restoration? God is the Restorer, and I know that He will restore your marriage, if you allow Him.

    I hope this brother’s testimony will boost your faith:

    “I read your article in the newspaper. In fact, I have seen a lot of changes in my life, which prompted me to give this glorious testimony of the wonderful works of our Lord Jesus Christ.

    I got married in 1977 as an unbeliever, before I joined the police force in the year 2000. But somehow, my marriage broke up as a result of so many things. But God rebuilt the marriage from the advice and instruction I got from your article.

    I congratulate you for your effort in enlightening young men and women concerning their marital lives, so that their marriages will be peaceful and successful.” Udual, A.

    I see God giving you your own testimony, too, in Jesus’ name!

    You need the grace of God upon your life to be able to stay in your covenant marriage. This grace is only released to those who are born again. You can become born again by confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as your own Lord and personal Saviour. If you are set for this new birth experience, you can say this prayer and be born again: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • How to improve on your marriage (2)

    Dear Reader,

    Calvary greetings to you in the precious name of Jesus Christ! Last week, I shared with you on what your perspective should be about marriage. I also said that marriage is a miracle.

    This week, I will be looking at what I have captioned: Marriage Covenant Responsibilities.

    The Word of God makes it clear that marriage is a covenant, and this is expounded in my book: Marriage Covenant. What is a Covenant? The dictionary defines it as ‘a binding agreement or a contract’ usually between two people.

    The Word of God says: Marriage is honourable (Hebrews 13:4). It goes to say, therefore, that the agreement of marriage between two people is seen as a good thing in the sight of God, which eventually leads to honour and dignity for the parties involved. I want to let you know, therefore, that it is a good thing that you desire marriage, if you are not yet married. For those already married, it is a good step you have taken in life. You shall have no cause to regret it in Jesus’ name.

    However, as good as marriage is, there are covenant responsibilities that must be operated, in order for it to produce the desired good. The Word says: If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land (Isaiah 1:19). There is good in marriage, but you must be willing and obedient to operate the covenant.

    My husband, Dr. David Oyedepo will always say, “A life without responsibilities is a liability”. Furthermore, he says, “Responsibility is the price for greatness”. Do you desire good in your marriage? Are you longing for peace, harmony and serenity in your marital life? Then apply yourself to the demands of a good home. If you are yet to enact the covenant of marriage, begin to ask for grace to comply with the demands.

    What are these Covenant Responsibilities?

    FOR THE MAN:

    As A Husband, you are the head of the woman, the leader and not a dictator. You are to love your wife unconditionally as a friend and as a lover sexually (Ephesians 5:25-29). You must honour her and not treat her as a lesser being, or a slave (1 Peter 3:7). Much more, you must dwell with her according to knowledge.

    As A Father, you have the responsibility of raising your children in the nature and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4, Deuteronomy 6:6-7), not by bullying and beating. Instead, apply the rod of the Word of God, and as you mold them in the fear of the Lord, you are raising godly children, who will in turn call you blessed.

    As A Provider: A French proverb says, “A father is a banker provided by nature”. Your primary responsibility is meeting the needs of your home. The woman is only your help meet. Never shift your responsibility to your wife; it is anti-covenant to do so. To shy away from this responsibility makes you worse than an infidel [an unbeliever] (1 Timothy 5:8). This shall not be your portion!

    FOR THE WOMAN:

    As A Wife, you have the power of influence, while your husband has the power of authority. Thus, you must be a positive influence. Your responsibility, however, as far as God is concerned, is that of submission. Willingly surrender yourself to be ruled by your husband, obeying him in love (Ephesians 5:22-24). Cook and dress to please him (I Peter 3:2). Learn to go to God in prayer, rather than arguing.

    As A Mother, train your children spiritually, physically and morally, bringing them up to become arrows in the hands of God. Your role in the life of your children is a non-transferable responsibility. Therefore, don’t push them to another person to train for you.

    As A Home Maker, see to the general welfare of the home, plan and manage the resources provided (Titus 2:5). Also see to the welfare of every member of your household. This is your primary assignment, before your career or business.

    You need the grace of God to carry out your covenant responsibilities. You need to surrender your life to Christ so that, that grace can be released to you. You can say this prayer and receive that grace: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • How to improve on your marriage (1)

    Dear Reader,

    Halleluyah! We have come to the last and crowning month of this glorious year. As always, it is a great privilege to welcome you to another exciting time on your favourite weekly column.  Our focus for this month shall be on How to Improve on Your Marriage.

    Today, I would start by saying that Marriage Is A Miracle! It is important for you to know that nothing works on its own, just as no problem solves itself. In the same vain, miracles only answer to certain inputs from the benefactor. In other words, your obedience to what is required of you and how you initiate same is what eventually makes your marriage a wonder to behold.

    Take the miracle of the turning of water into wine, for instance.  Mary told the servants: whatever he (Jesus) tells you to do, do it (John 2:5). The servants initiated their miracle by obeying Jesus’ instructions to fill the water pots with water. Nothing happens by chance in the Kingdom of God. There is always something you must do to get what you want. All you need to do is to accept the required responsibility.

    Marriage is a miracle! Daily, we see men and women seeking after soothsayers and seers, to know whom to marry, the cause of their marital delays, to find out what the future holds for their marriages, and how they can be guided into glorious homes.

    But, for us at the other side of Jordan, we have a reason to thank God. This is because, He doesn’t leave us to guess and grope through life. That is why He said: Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not (Jeremiah 33:3).

    It is the thoughts of man that make a man. What you think of your marriage and family makes it what it is. You can’t think obstacles in your marriage and have miracles. You can’t think of marriage as a necessary evil, and experience a glorious marriage, because sweet marriages and homes are basically provoked by your thoughts.

    Nobody builds a tower without adequate preparation and a strong foundation. You must first desire a tower, before you can build one. Do not enter into a marriage covenant without an expectation. If you expect the best, it will be yours (Proverbs 23:18).

    Someone once came to me for counselling and said that she had been having a very tough time in her marriage. As she spoke, I deduced that the root cause of her problems was her wrong perspective about marriage. She had expected grief and calamity, so when the storms rose against her marriage, she began to cry, saying, “They told me that it would be like this.”

    Below is a testimony that will further help your perspective about marriage:

    “I used to worship in a place where the pastors believe that misunderstanding brings about understanding. One day, the lady pastor asked me if I had ever had any serious quarrel with my wife (then my fiancée), and I said, ‘No’.  She then said that we had not started, and that until we had quarreled and fought, we would not know if we truly love each other.

    Shortly after our wedding, we started having problems in our home. But when I came here, I heard the Bishop say, ‘I have not had the first argument with my wife.’ I told my wife that if what the man of God said is the truth, then we’ve been in the wrong place, where we had been fed with the wrong spiritually food.  So, we decided to start worshipping here.

    We told ourselves, ‘What this man of God has seen that is making his marriage sweet, we also must discover it.’ Then I was in WOFBI Full-Time programme. After each lecture, I would go home and teach my wife the same thing. Today, to the glory of God, we don’t have misunderstandings anymore!” Ibiang, A.I.

    God has promised to grant your expectations, whether good or bad. So, let your expectations be based on God’s Word, for it is higher than any evil experience or information about marriage you may have had or heard (Proverbs 10:24).

    If you have caught any light from this piece, believe God for a unique touch in your home, and you will have a testimony in Jesus’ name.

    To have a miracle marriage, you need to first of all receive the Miracle Worker into your life. His Name is Jesus and you can receive Him by confessing your sins and saying this prayer with faith in your heart: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Marriage: A lifetime covenant (3)

    Dear Reader,

    I count it a great privilege to share God’s Word with you through this medium. It is my prayer that as you apply the series of teachings that you have received this month, they shall bring a positive change in your life and marriage in Jesus’ name.

    I discussed the origin of marriage with you in my first lesson for this month. Three weeks ago, I taught you Marriage Covenant Responsibilities. In last week’s teaching, I told you that marriage is a miracle. Today, I want you to Make Right the Wrongs of Your Marriage Covenant.

    Some people get troubled when they read materials like this, probably because they have been living together with their partners without payment of dowry, or any formal engagement/ public Christian wedding. This is not a holy union. So many couples have been living together for years and have even had children without a proper marriage.

    Instead of feeling or living in condemnation, you need to make things right today. In case you are not legally married and you fall into this category, go right away and make things right by paying the dowry. Go and legalise your union. You can do this, simply, by going to the registry for a court wedding. Thereafter, look for a minister of the gospel to bless your union.

    Time never corrects an error! An error yesterday remains an error today, except it is corrected. You can make a wrong, right!  Many people pass through a lot of difficulties in their marriages today, because of the wrong foundation of their union. I have seen women being driven out of their homes at the death of their husbands, because their union was “illegal”. The woman has no voice, because she has no legal backing. Wisdom is profitable to direct (Ecclesiastics 10: 10).

    I remember a woman I counselled sometime ago. She had been going through a tough time in her home and was ready to call it quit. To top it up, she had no child. When I interviewed her closely, I discovered that there were a lot of loopholes in her marriage. Her dowry was not paid, and there was nothing legally binding her and the man together as husband and wife. No court wedding, no church wedding; both of them just started living together!

    I counselled her to ensure that the dowry was paid, legal papers signed in the court of law, and that their union be blessed by a minister of the gospel. The next time I saw her, she was over-joyous and full of testimonies. To the glory of God, today all is well with that marriage. To crown it all, she was also expecting a baby as at that time!

    A good example of a proper marriage is recorded in Genesis.  It clearly shows us how a formal wedding should be conducted.  Adam did not just rise up to find Eve wandering about in another part of the garden, and he decided to take her home and they just started living together as husband and wife. The Word of God says: And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man (Genesis 2:22). Take note of the word, ‘brought her unto the man’. God was the One, Who brought the woman to the man.

    Since marriage is the basis for a successful family, then, you must first be married before you can enjoy a successful family life. If the foundation of your marriage is not built on the instructions of the Word of God, there is no way you will have a fulfilled family life. It is important, therefore, that you go and pay the dowry, if it has not been paid. This is scriptural.

    There is another account in the Scriptures of how a typical wedding and all that is required should be done. The Word of God says: And they called Rebekah, and said unto her, Wilt thou go with this man? And she said, I will go. And they sent away Rebekah their sister, and her nurse, and Abraham’s servant, and his men. And they blessed Rebekah, and said unto her, Thou art our sister, be thou the mother of thousands of millions, and let thy seed possess the gate of those which hate them (Genesis 24:58-60).

    A parental blessing is very important in a marriage covenant. It is something you cannot rule out. There is something about the blessings your parents pronounce on you that makes it stick on you until all their good wishes are established in your life. From the above Scripture, Abraham’s servant did not just grab Rebekah and disappeared with her. Due procedures were properly followed and the blessings of her parent became a practical reality in her life.

    Some years ago, I shared this truth at one of our women conventions. Meanwhile, a couple had been living together for almost 10 years without being properly married, had three children but the lady’s parents refused to consent to their marriage. After the convention, they decided to make peace and do the right thing. They had been up and down financially over the years. They invested so much, but had very little in return. They were very zealous for the things of God, they are covenant practitioner; yet, there was nothing to show for it. They met the lady’s family, paid the dowry, went to church and had their union blessed by one of the pastors.

    Soon after, great business doors opened for them, their lives took a new turn and they began to enjoy all manner of favours. Thereafter, they built their own house and even bought a Mercedes Benz car, all through the simple act of making wrong, right in their union. Your own testimony will be the next!

    It is also very important in your marriage covenant to acknowledge the place of a holy Christian wedding. The Word of God says: And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man (Genesis 2:22). In this verse of Scripture, we see God’s practical involvement in the institution of marriage. He gave Eve out to Adam. It is, therefore, unsafe for you to go into marriage without God. This will definitely attract the attacks of the devil. You shall not be a victim in Jesus’ name!

    God is your Father, and only a bastard would desire to go outside his father’s house to get married. The presence of God makes all the difference in a man’s life. Therefore, don’t go about without carrying the presence of God; it is dangerous!

    You also need a proper legal documentation of your union.   This is a point of contact to remind God that you have fulfilled all righteousness concerning your marriage; as such, the enemy must not have access into your family.

    You need the grace of God to make the wrong, right in your marriage. That grace is available to every born again child of God. You can say this prayer and shall be born again: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Marriage: A lifetime covenant (3)

    Dear Reader,

    I discussed the origin of marriage with you in my first lesson. Last week, I looked at marriage covenant responsibilities. Let me also say today, that marriage is a miracle! It is important for you to know that nothing works on its own, just like no problem solves itself. Miracles answer to certain inputs from the benefactor. Your obedience to what is required of you is how you initiate it.

    Take the miracle of the turning of water into wine, for instance.  Mary told the men, “Whatever he tells you to do, do it” (John 2:5). The servants initiated their miracle by obeying Jesus’ instructions to fill the water pots with water. Nothing happens by chance in the Kingdom of God. There is always something you must do to get what you want. All you need to do is accept the required responsibility.

    Marriage is a miracle! Daily, we see men and women seeking after soothsayers and seers, to know whom to marry. Some highly placed and educated young men and ladies creep stealthily into the dingy abodes of herbalists, to know the cause of their marital delays.

    Also, it is a common thing to see couples running after palm readers, fortune-tellers and astrologers, just to find out what the future holds for their marriages, and how they can be guided into glorious homes. But, for us at the other side of Jordan, we have a reason to thank God. He doesn’t leave us to guess and grope through life. That is why He said: Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not (Jeremiah 33:3).

    It is the thoughts of man that makes a man. What you think of your marriage and family makes it what it is. You can’t think obstacles in your marriage and have miracles. You can’t think of marriage as a necessary evil, and experience a glorious marriage, because sweet marriages and homes are basically provoked by your thoughts.

    Glorious marriages don’t happen by chance; they are product of choices. You can choose what happens to your marriage and family by the way you think. You have the mind of Christ which is a miracle mind, and miracle minds don’t think obstacles in marriage or consider barriers in the home. So, do not carry obstacle thoughts when looking for a life partner. Do not think impossibilities when you are looking up to God for miracle babies. The two don’t go together.

    Do you know that most couples cannot build matrimonial homes because of obstacle thoughts? Many don’t even eat good food because they don’t know where tomorrow’s meal will come from. Some couples think of nothing good about their families; all they see are obstacles. As such, they wallow in abject failure and frustration, without knowing that a man’s thoughts today make him what he would be tomorrow.

    Nobody builds a tower without adequate preparation and a strong foundation. You must first desire a tower, before you can build one. Do not enter into a marriage covenant without an expectation. If you expect the best, it will be yours (Proverbs 23:18).

    Someone once came to me for counselling. She had been having a very tough time in marriage. As she spoke, I discovered that the root cause of her problems was her wrong perspective about marriage. She had expected grief and calamity, so when the storms rose against her marriage, she began to cry, saying, “They told me that it will be like this.” Below is a testimony that will further help your perspective in your marriage.

    “I used to worship in a place where the pastors believe that ‘misunderstanding brings about understanding.’ One day, the lady pastor asked me if I had ever had any serious quarrel with my wife (then my fiancée), and I said, ‘No’. She then said we had not started, and that until we had quarreled and fought, we would not know if we truly love each other.

    Thereafter, we started having problems in our home after our marriage.  But when I came here, I heard the Bishop say, ‘I have not had the first argument with my wife.’ I told my wife that if what the man of God said is the truth, then we’ve been in the wrong place, where we had been fed with the wrong spiritually food. So, we decided to start worshipping here.

    We told ourselves, ‘What this man of God has seen that is making his marriage sweet, we also must discover it.’ Then, I was in WOFBI Full-Time programme. After each lecture, I would go home and teach my wife the same thing. Today, to the glory of God, we don’t have misunderstandings any more!” Ibiang, A.I.

    God has promised to grant your expectations, whether good or bad. So, let your expectations be based on God’s Word, for it is higher than any evil experience or information about marriage you may have had or heard (Proverbs 10:24).

    If you are already married, there is still a chance to change all negative expectations. As a couple, discuss your positive expectations, and I guarantee that things will work out more smoothly in your home.

    Unmarried ladies and young men, what do you expect in marriage? Your expectations shall not be cut off (Proverb 23:18). Before we got married, my husband and I made discoveries from God’s Word that made us expect a hitch-free marriage. Our testimony today: those expectations have not been cut off.

    I believe you have been mightily blessed by this teaching. So, as I pray for your family, believe God for a unique touch in your home. You will have a testimony!

    In the Name of Jesus, I ask for the hand of God to rest heavily on your home. Because marriage is a miracle, I declare that from today, you begin to enjoy God’s goodness and honour in your marriage!

    To have a miracle marriage, you need to first of all receive the Miracle Worker into your life. His Name is Jesus and you can receive Him by confessing your sins and saying this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Marriage: A lifetime covenant

    Dear Reader,

    I welcome you to this month’s teaching. I want you to be rest assured that God is going to visit you this month. This month, I shall be discussing on Marriage: A Lifetime Covenant.

    Today, I want to start by looking at the origin of marriage. In Genesis 2:18-25, we see God initiating the idea of male and female relationship in which both will serve as succour to each other. God’s purpose for instituting marriage is to create a help that is suitable, adaptable and complementary, to establish unity and for procreation.

    What is Marriage?

    Marriage is a union between a man and a woman. It is the coming together of two people of opposite sex, with a view to building a God-centred home. Marriage is not the culture of any country of the world; rather, it is heaven’s culture. It is God’s idea, not man’s idea. The Word of God says: And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof. And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man (Genesis 2:21-22).

    God in His infinite wisdom knew that man would have certain needs and desires that cannot be satisfied by animals or other things He created. So, He initiated the idea of marriage, and formed a helpmeet for man.

    It is important for us to know that at the beginning of the institution called marriage, God introduced it as a union between a man and woman and not same sex. People of the world have perverted what God Himself formed for man and his wife to enjoy. In the beginning, it was not so. Homosexualism is really growing fast in various countries of the world today. God’s rule has been laid down concerning this abominable thing. The Word of God says: Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination (Leviticus 18:22).

    Scripturally, marriage is for a lifetime. It is, therefore, not to be entered into without knowing what you are getting into. It is very important for you to know what marriage is and is not, before you say, “I do” to anyone. Hear the testimony of this sister.

    “When I was ready for marriage, I noticed that some things were working against me. But I was not a serious Christian then. However, when I dedicated my life fully to Jesus Christ in 1992, it became obvious. Yet, I lacked wisdom and counsel, and I was emotionally immature.

    All the same, I got married, and the Lord has been merciful.  However, on joining this Church and listening to different ministrations, my life and marriage has acquired meaning, and direction. Now, my marriage is established and I am free from all manner of oppressions of the wicked.

    My family has increased remarkably and I now apply myself to the wisdom of God that He has imparted on me by reason of the teachings and ministrations I get here!”

    Opara, C. C. N.

    God ordained marriage for man and woman to give, and receive satisfaction, and to meet the needs, and desires of one another. This marriage relationship is very unique since it involves the spirit, soul and body of two individuals. As long as a couple is born again and their lives have been transformed, they have become new creatures and they belong to the same spiritual Kingdom.

    Our father, Abraham, knew the importance of this; that is why he told his servant to go to his (Abraham’s) people to get a wife for his son. The Word of God says: And Abraham said unto his eldest servant of his house, that ruled over all that he had, Put, I pray thee, thy hand under my thigh. And I will make thee swear by the Lord, the God of heaven, and the God of the earth, that thou shalt not take a wife unto my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell (Genesis 24:2-3).

    In the realm of the soul, both husband and wife should have the same mind concerning issues of life, especially when it comes to living one’s life according to the doctrines of the Holy Bible. There must be an agreement between the couple, before they can really walk in the principles of the Bible. The Bible advises: Can two walk together, except they be agreed? (Amos 3:3).

    It is important, therefore, for us to know that there is no agreement between light and darkness. So, as a believer in Christ that is regenerated, you are not permitted to even consider an unbeliever for marriage. The Word of God says: Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people (2 Corinthians 6:14-16).

    To have a good marriage and a successful family, you need to first have a good stand with God. To do so, you need to confess your sins and surrender your life to Him. Please say this prayer in faith, if you are ready for this: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • God’s ultimate desire for your marriage (4)

    DEAR READER,

    You are welcome to God’s presence! I have shown you some of God’s desires for your marriage. Today, I shall be looking at how Marriage is for Better Living.

    Marriage was instituted for the better living of mankind. It is not to bring hurts or constitute a hindrance. If you want your home and marriage to exhibit a better living, God must be at the centre of your heart and home. You have to be open to His Words and follow His instructions. His Words, instructions or commandments are not grievous or burdensome (1 John 5:3).

    In other words, it is an easy thing to do because God created man with an innate desire to please Him and follow His will (Scripture). The Lord Jesus came to make it easier for man to follow and obey the Word of God. He said: Come, all that labour… for my burden is light and my yoke is easy (Matthew 11:28). Instead of seeking to do things your way, why not do them God’s way to get the results you desire cheaply.

    Because family life originated from the Lord, He must be the centre of your family life to enjoy a better living. Countless people are having a near death experience in their family lives. Some married many wives and are still dissatisfied. Others are separated, while some live a cat and dog life, wishing that someone would deliver them from it. Despite all these, there are some who are enjoying family life and making a success of it. This is not just by luck. Success is not by luck, you programme yourself for the type of success you desire.

    As a born-again child of God, enjoying a better family life is your birthright. It is God’s will and desire for you to enjoy an exciting marriage, home, life and family. Apart from making God the centre of your family, the next thing you must understand is that family life is meant for better living. It is meant for help, not hurt. The Bible says: I will make him a help meet (Genesis 2:18); Two are better than one (Ecclesiastes 4:9).

    Family life was created to help man and not hinder him; it is not meant to make life worse for him. If that is what you have been seeing in the lives and homes of others, or maybe in yours, I can assure you that it is not what God desires for you. Whether you are a father, mother, husband, wife, child or relation, can you boldly say with sincerity from your heart that you are a help to others in the home? Or have you been a hindrance to the success of others in the home? Is it your policy at home to help family members? Or do you maintain a survival-of-the-fittest attitude?

    In case someone has told you: “That’s how life is”, “Just bear it”, or “Maybe that’s your lot in life.” That’s not what God has designed for you. Don’t accept less than what God has purposed for you. Don’t allow the devil to cheat you into believing that a better living and marriage are not for you to enjoy. Your family can still stand out; your situation can still change. The breath of life can still find its way into your family, if you will co-operate with God.

    As a wife/mother, God put you beside that man and those children, so you can help them. As a husband/father, God put you beside that woman, children, so you can help them, be an example to them and bring them up the right way. It is not your teachers’ responsibility to train your children. Children, God put you in that family to be a blessing (Psalm 127:3). Are you a pleasure to your family or a pain? If you are about getting married, are you ready to be a help to your mate? Or are you just looking for someone to service your needs? If you are not ready to be a help, watch it and retrace your steps.

    To be a help transcends all areas of life. If one party is faltering, the other needs to lift him or her up. The Word of God says: If they fall, the one will lift up his fellow… (Ecclesiastes 4:10).

    No matter how much your success, your connection or family members will also need to succeed. If you ignore their progress, you may eventually be faced with mending their failures. No matter who that member of the family is, the grace of God is sufficient for you. It will enable you to be a helper in Jesus’ name!

    Financially, you are also meant to be a helper in your family. Money seeks worshippers; refuse to be its convert. Some Christians go to church, sing together, lift up hands to God, but when it comes to money, that is their god which must not be touched. Read this testimony: “I am newly married and was touched by what you narrated about homes in the article of “Family Matters”. Since then, through my application of the knowledge gained, things have changed positively for me…” Chidube, N.A. (Aba).

    Money has brought division into many families. Don’t let it bring division into yours. Ensure that you are a helper to your spouse in this area. Hiding your money from one another is not the way to financial success. Render financial help to one another. The humorous thing about money is that if you don’t know how to send it on errands, it will send you and often times, on evil ones. If you have been defaulting, you can repent by saying this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • God’s ultimate desire for your marriage

    Dear Reader,

    You are welcome to another segment on Family Forum. Throughout this month, I shall be deliberating on the topic: God’s Ultimate Desire for Your Family. First, it is important to know that God is particularly concerned about your marriage and family. He wants to see you have the best of marriage and to enjoy a successful home. He has made everything available for you to experience a successful home. Moreover, it is God’s desire for all His children to have the best on earth, in life and for their marriages to be peaceful, and fulfilling. That includes you! Today, I will be teaching on: Keeping yourself pure.

    It is God’s desire that your marriage be kept pure. You must, therefore, ensure that you keep the marriage-bed pure to enjoy the honour in marriage. The Word of God says: Marriage is honourable in all and the bed undefiled… (Hebrews 13:4). The word ‘undefiled’ there simply means kept pure. Whether as singles or married, to enjoy the honour in marriage, you must ensure that you keep the marriage-bed pure. If this was impossible, God won’t tell you to do it. Young men, don’t keep messing around with ladies, thinking that nobody knows. God’s Word says: The eyes of the Lord are in every place beholding the evil and the good (Proverbs 15:13). Don’t take away the honour that God has in store for you in marriage.

    Marriage is honourable in all when the bed is undefiled. As singles, if you must enjoy honour in your marriage, you must lay a good foundation for it by keeping yourself pure. Parents, begin to train your children against pre-marital sex. It does not matter whether it is acceptable in the society or not. If you say, “After doing it, God will forgive me”, please note that the scar will be there.

    The marriage bed must remain undefiled, because sex is the seal of the marriage covenant. Any sexual relationship engaged in outside marriage breaks the seal and attracts God’s punishment.  Therefore, you must never get yourself involved in it. However, if you have already defiled the bed, repent and ask God for forgiveness, then forsake it immediately.

    Many people get emotionally distorted when they defile the marriage bed to the extent that it disturbs their marital life. You can save your marriage from torments by keeping your life pure. When you defile the marriage bed, you are behaving like a beast and whatever happens to a beast can happen to you anytime. Therefore, you must make a change in the right direction, in the name of Jesus Christ. The later part of our anchor Scripture says: …but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. The word ‘whore’ simply means harlot. Give no room to the devil if your soul is actually precious to you. Defiling the marriage-bed whether you are single or married, proves that your soul is not precious to you.

    God made man with certain physiological and emotional needs, and marriage provides the best fulfilment for those needs. Physiologically, man needs sex; it is part of his physical nature, and the satisfaction of that urge is permitted only within the parameters of marriage. God honours the physical union of a man and his wife by ensuring that they find fulfilment in each other’s body. This is why He frowns at adultery and fornication. 1 Corinthians 7:2 says: Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. This is not to say that young men and women should rush into marriage for the sole aim of satisfying their sexual urge. That would make them nothing but bedmates. The love and excitement in such a relationship never last, and that is not God’s plan or purpose for marriage. As a single man or lady, you are expected to control your urge until you locate a suitable partner with whom you are ready to spend the rest of your life; then, get legally married. The truth is, if you cannot tame your sexual drive while single, you probably will not be able to exercise control when you are married. Flaunting God’s purpose in this area of marriage can be very costly to your home and destiny. Don’t do it.

    Refuse to fall a victim if you truly have value for yourself. Don’t say that you want to earn yourself a living by whoremongering because God will judge those who do that. Stop it! Don’t wait for the fire of God to come upon you; plead for His mercy, call upon Him now that He is ready to hear you, before it’s too late.  The Word of God says: I beseech you therefore brethren by the mercies of God that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God which is your reasonable service (Romans 12:1). In order words, the presentation of your body unto the Almighty God as a living sacrifice is your reasonable service unto God. Any service done unto God without your body being a living sacrifice is not acceptable. It does not matter what you do and the volume of money you give in church every day, if your body is not kept pure, that service is not acceptable unto God. Whether single or married, illicit sexual affairs render your service to God “unrewardable” and will deprive you of enjoying the honour He has destined for you in marriage. God is much more interested in your person than your money or what you can do. When your person is acceptable unto God, then your service will become acceptable.

    Honour in marriage is your heritage in Christ. You need to take it by force by stopping every form of harlotry in your life. Receive grace to practise the Word of God so that you can truly enjoy the honour destined for you in marriage in Jesus’ name!

    If you are not born again and you want to accept Jesus as your Lord and Saviour, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Enjoying marital harmony (4)

    Dear Reader,

    For the past three weeks, we have been examining what it takes to enjoy marital harmony. Today, we shall be looking at the benefits of marital harmony.

    The Benefits of Marital Harmony

    God believes in profiting and His Word is meant to profit you.  It is very important for you to understand that when you live in harmony with your family, you are the primarily beneficiary.  Below are some of the benefits of marital harmony.

    Personal and Career Success

    When you live in harmony with your spouse, you will be able to plan with him, move the family forward and enjoy personal, and career successes. God created the family to enjoy fruitfulness in all areas. So, living in harmony with your spouse and family members is a sure foundation for you to enjoy career success in life.

    Marriage is designed to help you maximise your life, because God does not take His people backwards, but forward. So, God has designed marriage, among other things, to enable you grow to your maximum.  As such, you are the primary beneficiary when you live in harmony with your family.

    How does this work?

    In Genesis, we see how wonderful it is to live in harmony. It is written: And the LORD said, Behold, the people is one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do (Genesis 11:6).

    When a man and a woman agree to build a home both parties become dedicated to each other in terms of love, support and encouragement. As a result, they enhance each other’s performance because they want to please God and always do what is right.

    Also, it is important to know that there are certain jobs that when applied for, would inquire about your marital status because of the responsibility attached to marriage.

    However, we must recognise that lack of harmony in the home can affects the performance of an individual in life, at work and in his or her career.

    For instance, have you noticed that if a man leaves his home with troubles and concerns in his heart, he will carry them to his work place? He may not discuss his problems with his colleagues, but you will find out that those problems will automatically affect his performances. That is what makes harmony in the home the foundation, base and good ground upon which personal and career success are built.

    Church Building

    We are all aware that the church of Jesus Christ is made up of families. Every member of the church represents a specific family here on earth and every individual family makes up the church. When I talk about the church, I am referring to the body of Christ at large. So, when there is harmony in the families/ home, automatically, there will be unity and harmony in the church.

    Nation Building

    When the families enjoy unity, automatically, it will affect the nation.  There is so much negativism going on across the nations of the earth today. Every nation experiences a great deal of this negativism and the root cause is the disharmony experienced in the home. So, when the families/homes begin to enjoy harmony, it will affect the nations to a large extent.

    Sometimes ago, I read a story of a man named John Owen. He was a British Anthropologist, who conducted studies on eight civilisations that have come and gone. In his studies, he discovered that in the eight civilisations, “the fall of the family resulted in the fall of the nation.” This helps us to understand that to build our nation, the responsibility is on us as a church which includes the body of Christ and individual members representing specific families on the earth. Right now, I curse every spirit of disharmony and disagreement in your home in Jesus name!

    In conclusion, you must understand that if you are not born again, it will be impossible for you to benefit from what has just been discussed. If you want to be born again and become a child of God, please say this prayer of faith: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom”.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).