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Category: Family forum

  • Enjoying marital harmony (3)

    Dear Reader,

    You are welcome to this column once again. Today, we shall be looking at: ‘Understanding men and women differences’.

    Understand that men and women are different both physically and emotionally. For instance, if you see a man, you don’t need anyone to tell you, “That is a man.” In the same vein, as a man is different from a woman physically, so is he different from her in every other aspect. With this understanding, it will be easy for you to know your partner better. Men and women are created not to compete with each other, but to complement one another; so that whatever is lacking in one, the other will supply.

    Men and women are also different emotionally and that can be seen in the way they respond to issues, their outlook to life and their generally attitude to things on a daily basis. The understanding of these differences will help you to actualise the harmony that God has destined for your marriage. You will make it!

    The Area of Differences in Men and Women

    In their thinking trend

    Men think in a straight line and that helps them to maintain focus. So, when a man picks a thing, he focuses on it until it is accomplished because they think in a straight trend. On the other hand, we are told that women think in a grid. A “grid” is simply several lines. That is why you will discover that, naturally, it is possible for a woman to start many things at the same time but end up not accomplishing any of them.

    This is why, among other things, God instituted marriage to ensure a balance. Balance is the key for harmony in marriage. For instance, while the husband is maintaining focus, the wife is there sometimes, to say, “Take it easy. I need you, God needs you and the children need you.” Also, when the woman seems not to know what to focus on, the man is there to say: “I think you will do better in this or that area. Why don’t you believe God to give you direction?” He encourages her and then she begins to take giant steps in the things of God. I have said over and again, ‘If there is anything like another world, I will still marry my husband, Bishop David Oyedepo because, among other things, he has helped me a great deal to discover my God-given potentials. For that, I will ever be grateful, because now I know I am on course with destiny and purpose.

    In terms of priorities

    For men, their naturally priority is work. However, for the woman, relationship is a priority. She values relationships, her home, marriage and friends. That is why God orchestrated marriage to bring about balance and harmony in the home.

    Survival

    It is very important to understand that what oxygen is to a human being, is what respect from a wife is to her husband. Just as a human being cannot survive without oxygen, a husband cannot survive in a home without the respect of his wife. If women have an understanding of this, they will learn to respect their husbands more. Receive grace to respect your husband. As you begin to do so, you will discover that harmony will become a daily occurrence in your home.

    For the women, what oxygen is to a human being is what love from the husband is to her. The question is: men, how much do you love your wife? Some men keep saying well, my wife knows that I love her. Yes she knows, but she wants you to always express it in words to her. You have to say it to her over and again and let her know that you really love her. It was Lester Sumrall of blessed memory who said in his book, God’s Blue Print for a Happy Home: “A man can never fully understand what the statement ‘I love you’ can do in the life of his wife”. That is the way God made us. So, I say to the married men, say it often and begin to practice it over and again, and watch how harmony in your marriage will be cheaply established.

    So, when you look at the differences between men and women, you find out that balance is required. In addition, it is very important to understand that no amount of success at the office can take the place or compensate for the failure in the home. You shall not be a failure!

    Finally, it is important to know that unconditional love will take the grace of God to display because love is God’s nature. For you to enjoy harmony in your marriage love must be at work. A wise man once said, “Love without truth is hypocrisy, and truth without love is brutality”. You will not be found in either of them! Rather, the love of God which is already shed abroad in your heart by the Holy Ghost will begin to empower, engrace, energise and enable you to secure harmony in your marriage.

    Are you born again? This means to accept Jesus as your Saviour and Lord. If you desire this new birth experience, please say this prayer in faith: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom”.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Don’t give up! (4)

    Dear Reader,

    I am sure that you have been receiving some helpful truths on how to get your spouse saved. Continuous practice of what you have received will further guarantee a quick testimony for you in Jesus’ name!

    This week, I shall be teaching on one virtue that is very helpful in getting your spouse saved. It is one virtue that looks so insignificant that many believers find very hard to use. This virtue is PATIENCE.

    “Patience” is a human ability to accept delay, annoyance or suffering without complaining. It is also the ability to keep doing something that requires a lot of effort. Patience is a must, when it comes to the salvation of your spouse.

    Many, who are faced with the challenges of being married to their unsaved spouses, always seek quick ways of quitting their marriage.  Rather than staying in the marriage to work out the challenges, they opt for ways to put an end to their marriage. If this is the situation with you, I would like you to know that this is not the solution.

    Praying, fasting and living a Christian life that speaks will demand your patience as your unsaved spouse may try to frustrate your efforts by constantly doing things that may upset you or that are against your Christian faith. Your unsaved spouse’s contrary actions to what you are praying for, is not of his or her will. Remember, he or she has not seen the light and can be considered one who has been blinded. Also, he/she is still under the influence of the prince of this world (2 Corinthians 4:4).

    Patience, while praying, fasting and living a life that speaks is needful most times, especially when a miracle does not happen the way you expect it to. Hebrews 10:35-36 says: Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward. For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.

    Remember that when you too were unsaved, you may have done worse things in foolishness, but God still found joy in accepting you as His child. He forgave you and redeemed you so that you could do the same, especially towards your unsaved spouse. It may take some time for him or her to come around to accept Jesus with you, but patience will help you not to give up just too quickly.  Your faith will be tried as written in James 1:3-4 which says: Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. When your patience is in place, you will always find yourself strengthened instead of fainting at such times. Learn to exercise more patience with your spouse, who is an unbeliever. Do not see him or her as the person responsible for all those negative actions; rather, see the devil as the sole culprit and address the situation as such when you are before the Lord.

    Instead of talking back, nagging, shouting, insulting or giving in all together, remember that it is the voice of the devil that is controlling your spouse and not him/herself. When you see it this way, you will seek ways to protect your unsaved spouse and direct your anger back at the devil accordingly. All the testimonies that you have read since this teaching began, had the working of patience attached to them. The people involved, carefully and patiently acted on the Word of God that they had received.

    Here is another testimony that will further build your faith: “I give thanks to God for quelling the war in my home between my husband and I. I kept praying for God to touch my husband’s heart, so that we could both be attending church services together.  I remembered God’s Word, believed it and kept appropriating it to myself.

    On Tuesday, when another fight was to start, I left the house for my mother’s house. On returning home in the evening, my husband said that he wanted to talk with me. Then, he said that he wanted to give his life to Christ. This morning, to the glory of God, my husband is here in church with me”.

    The act of being patient can only be easy when God becomes your stronghold. It is quiet impossible to be patient by your own power and might. This is because it is holding on to God that will give you an access to that power. However, if you have not yet accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, you cannot become a child of God, neither can you access that power. If you will like to accept Jesus Christ now, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Don’t give up! (3)

    Dear Reader,

    Welcome to this week’s teaching. In the previous editions, we examined how to use prayers and a life that speaks to help get your unbelieving spouse saved. I see God turning your challenges into cheap miracles, as you put to practice those things that you have learnt, in Jesus’ name.

    This week, we shall be examining the use of FASTING in getting your spouse saved. “Fasting” means doing away with food for the purpose of concentration. It is a way of seeking the face of God, earnestly bringing the flesh under your control in order to be more sensitive to God.  God knew that there would be challenging situations that will prove a little difficult for us; that was why He recommended fasting. Mark 9:29 confirms that: “This kind can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting.  Set some time apart to fast for the salvation of your loved ones. This must be coupled with prayer and the Word of God.  When fasting is void of prayer and the Word of God, then it is hunger strike or mere dieting! Your fasting must also be done in wisdom. It is not how long you fast that matters, but how well and effective your fast is.

    I once met an elderly woman who became born again after she was married. Apparently, her husband was deep into the occult. This woman took up the challenge and started praying for her husband, breaking the power of the devil over his life. At a point in time, she started sacrificing her breakfast for her husband’s salvation. According to her, she would prepare her breakfast and give it to the needy. She did this for two years!

    Meanwhile, she was in a different city from where her husband was. Unknown to her, God had sent someone to cross path with the man and he gave his life to Christ. When this woman met her husband he was born again!  We serve a God of miracles!  Can you imagine her joy that day? But she had to pray, practise patience and fast about it.  Yours will be the next testimony in Jesus’ name!

    Fasting has several advantages in helping to get your spouse saved. Fasting is an added plus to prayers. When fasting is done effectively along with prayers using the Word of God, the result is always an immediate success. Some impossible situations recorded in Esther 4:3, Matthew 17:29 and Acts 14:23 in the Bible, experienced a turn-around through fasting and prayers.

    God’s Word in Isaiah 58:6-7 says: Is not this the fast that I have chosen? To loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?  Is not to deal thy bread to the hungry, and that thou bring the poor that are cast out to thy house?  When thou seest the naked, that thou cover him; and that thou hide not thyself from thin own flesh?  This means that fasting can set one lose from any kind of bondage and break every kind of yoke, when it is done effectively (Isaiah 58:8-14).  It is not just abstaining from food or drink, but abstaining with a major purpose of seeking God in prayers via His Word, while maintaining a good Christian life that speaks.

    This is an ‘all-round package’ for answered prayers that covers every area of need, including the salvation of your spouse! I see God answer your prayers according to the desires of your heart, as you simply put the above-mentioned points to work, in Jesus’ name!  Don’t give up on your spouse; your own testimony is at hand.

    However, the first thing to do for your fasting to be effective is to surrender your life to Christ and become a child of God. God will only listen to His children. God’s children are those who have accepted Him through His Son, Jesus Christ, as their Lord and Saviour. If you will like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour and become born-again, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Don’t give up! (2)

    Dear Reader,

    Last week, I showed you how you can win your spouse and loved ones for Christ through prayers. This week, I will teach you another effective way to win them to Christ, which is by Living a Life That Speaks. Do you remember that old proverb which says, “Action speaks louder than words?”  There is a life that speaks!  Its voice is louder than the sound from the vocal cavity of man. It gets an unbelieving husband or wife saved. It ministers and brings glory to God. It is the kind of life that every believer must live in the home, at work, at the market place and everywhere, so that sinners can be magnetised into the Kingdom of God.

    Your life is the greatest witness, especially to your spouse.  Your unbelieving spouse will always consciously or unconsciously watch to see what you preach in your actions. Your actions should speak louder than your words.

    Your Christian life must be one of good example that portrays the fruits of the Spirit. Galatians 5:22-23 says: But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.  If you live a Christian life having these characteristics, it will influence your spouse and even other relations, to the extent that without opening your mouth to witness to them (even though it is scriptural to witness to them), they will be attracted to the Kingdom of God.

    Your spouse will be easily won to Christ when you do it using the fruit of the Spirit mentioned above. These characteristics must replace every other negative attitude. They must be clearly seen by him, her and everyone around you. Jesus, our role model for winning souls, expects us to live a life worthy of emulation. God’s Word in Matthew 5:16 says: Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your father which is in heaven. I have had opportunities to counsel people, who have unsaved loved ones, and discovered that quite a number of them do not live lives that speak right in their homes.

    I once met a woman who was having problems with the salvation of her husband. I, later, discovered from my discussion with her that the way she used her tongue in the home had constituted the major obstacle to the man’s salvation. Brethren, be chaste in your conversation!  Women are usually guilty of this. As long as you keep nagging your unsaved husband, after a while, he will not even like you to be around him. This may even lead to a divorce in a home. Do not let your tongue be a trap to your loved ones; instead, let it be an asset!

    Living a Christian life is not as convenient; rather, it must be compulsory. Therefore, you have a job to do. So, a woman who has a husband, who is an unbeliever and probably a drunkard, would need to fall on her knees and take the situation to God in prayers. She would also need to follow up on her prayers with the practice of the fruit of the Spirit. Nagging, insulting, abusing or cursing the man will only push him deeper into his sins. Remember, whatever happens to him, will also affect you in the long run.

    Therefore, let your life be a living proof of the characteristics of the fruit of the Spirit. Let love, gentleness and meekness be your stronghold. Let it move you to prayers, watching out for your unbelieving spouse even in a terrible drunken state. Let your actions speak patience, temperance, faith and very shortly, God will touch your spouse’s heart by His power as written in John 6:44 which says: No man can come to me, except the Father which hath sent me draw him: and I will raise him up at the last day.

    Here is a testimony that will inspire you: “When we started preparing for the Women’s Convention, I prayed to God and told Him that I wanted my own family renewed. I did not like the names I was being called, (I was called the wife of an unbeliever). But I told God I didn’t want to be called that anymore.

    God did a great thing, even before the convention began! He changed my husband!

    On the day of the last Breakthrough Night, my husband said by himself, “We have to go to church’.  We came to church together and he gave his life to Christ that day. He has now stopped smoking and everything has changed in his life. He is now a new person!  Efemuaye L.

    I see God do the same for you in Jesus’ name! With Him, ALL things are possible. Embrace Him today and turn the life of your spouse and loved ones around for good. To embrace God through His Son, Jesus Christ, and become born again, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Building trust in your relationship (4)

    DEAR Reader, I welcome you to this last edition of the teachings of this month. The Lord is good and His mercies endure forever. He has been faithful to His Word!  I hope you have been taking time to follow the series of teaching that have been coming your way since the month began? You shall not fail in your relationship in Jesus’ name! In my first lesson, I taught on “How You Can Build Trust”. The second lesson, I taught on “Relationship”, and in the third teaching, I showed you the relationship between family members and others around us. Today, I want to show you the Benefits of Building Trust in Your Relationship.

    What are the Benefits of Building Trust in Your Relationship?

    It brings Intimacy

    Intimacy is defined as “a feeling of being intimate and belonging together, close in friendship or acquaintance”. What trust does in any relationship is to bring people close together, with a sense of true belonging to one another in an atmosphere of true friendship. Intimacy is one of the benefits of trust. Trust is very fundamental in building a successful relationship. True and lasting intimacy can only be built with trust as its backbone. Just as building trust takes time, so does intimacy; it does not just grow naturally, and it is not something that can be enforced. Intimacy will only come when everyone feels a sense of safety and confident in the integrity of the other person involved.

    Any family that enjoys intimacy must of a necessity command the blessings of the Lord. The Word of God says: Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious ointment upon the head, that ran down upon the beard, even Aaron’s beard: that went down to the skirts of his garments. As the dew of Hermon, and as the dew that descended upon the mountains of Zion: for there the Lord commanded the blessing, even life for evermore (Psalm 133:1-134:1).

    Children brought up in an atmosphere of true intimacy are usually very emotionally balanced. They find it easier to resist and overcome peer pressures, because they feel so much love and affection from their family members. I want you to know that intimacy involves both physical and emotional interaction. It helps one to be able to share his/her feelings, experiences and thoughts in a very honest way among family members or in your relationship with others.

    It eliminate fear

    Another great benefit of building trust in your family is the elimination of fear. It is important for you to know that fear dies where there is trust in any kind of relationship. You can therefore entrust your life and anything in the hand of the person you trust without being afraid of what will happen. As we all know, fear is a spirit that gives birth to jealousy and insecurity in any relationship.

    Sometimes, there is a feeling of insecurity between husband and wife which leads to an unwanted apprehension of marital unfaithfulness. Husband and wife must learn to be open to each other. The devil often makes people to think that if they open up completely, they may never be accepted for who they are or that when their friends or spouse hear the whole truth about an issue, they won’t love them anymore. But this is a lie of the devil. Trust is probably the most important ingredient in building an intimate relationship between husband and wife.

    Trust is one thing that takes a long time to build and a very short time to destroy. Be careful how you treat each other. Many people wrongly believe that in a good marriage, you can “relax” and not have to monitor everything you say and do. This is farther from the truth. In a good marriage, you must always be monitoring your behavior. This is the key to building a strong relationship and trust. May the Lord give you understanding!

    To enjoy the benefits of building trust in your relationship, you need to have a relationship with God first and foremost. That is what being born gain is all about. Do you want to be born again? Just say this prayer and you shall become a child of God: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom”.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Building trust in your relationship (3)

    DEAR Reader, I thank God for the privilege to bring God’s Word your way again today. It is my prayer that as you take time to follow the principles outlined in this teaching, your relationship with God and others shall be sweeter in Jesus’ name! In my first lesson of this teaching, I showed you how you can build trust. Last week, I discussed about a very important subject in our daily living – Relationship between family members and others around us. This subject is as important as our relationship with God, our Maker. In fact the Bible says: If a man say, I love God, and hateth his brother, he is a liar: for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen? (1 John 4:20). You will see some people, even among Christians, worshipping in the same church, but having problems in their relationships with one another.

    The responsibility of living peacefully is not only on one person but on all family members: husband should ensure it with his wife, parents are to teach their children, and in-laws are to live together in peace and harmony. Scripturally, envy and strife are not only sin, but they also bring evil upon the members of the family (James 3:16).

    The Bible says: Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord: Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled (Hebrews 12:14-15). This Scripture also says to follow peace with all men. That means not only believers, but unbelievers as well.

    You need the Grace of God to relate with others

    What is Grace? Grace is unmerited favour. Something you don’t work for or earn, but you receive. God is the sole custodian, and He says that grace will elude whosoever will not obey His commandment to live at peace with all men. You will not fail of the grace of God. Anyone living in hatred, bitterness, malice and all sorts comes short of the grace of God. This year is our year of From Glory to Glory, if you don’t want a damn in your glory, shun away from everything that constitute sin in your life. Sin is refusing to obey God. It is the grace of God that will make you to shine for all to see this year.

    A Christian who is not living at peace with other family members, keeping malice, walking in hatred or anger, and claims to be a prayer giant, no matter the grace of God and the level of it that is released upon such individual in prayer, that prayer life can never be effective. Why? The Bible says that such a person abides in death.

    It doesn’t matter who you are and what position you occupy in your church, until you learn the act of living peaceably with other people, the grace of God upon your life will not find fulfilment. Avoid anger, hatred and strife. They are little-little foxes that spoil the vine and frustrate the grace of God upon an individual’s life.

     

    TO LIVE PEACEFULLY WITH OTHERS YOU NEED TO:

    1.Forgive Instantly: Learn to make excuses for people. Don’t see every hurt as an attack. See it as the best that individual can do as at that time.

    2.Be ready to ask for Forgiveness: Pride is a killer. Never be too big to ask for forgiveness or say sorry. It keeps your mind at peace.

    3.Communicate Effectively: A lot of times, erroneous assumptions lead to strife and bitterness against one another in the home. However, effective communication between family members would go a long way in the pursuit of peace.

    4.Live by the Word: Let the Word of God be your guide. Whatsoever He tells you to do, do it. Let obedience to God and to His Word be a way of life for you.

    5.Pray in the Spirit: Romans 8:13 says that if you live after the flesh, you shall die. But by the Spirit, you can mortify the deeds of the body.

    The peace of God which passes all understanding shall keep you spirit, soul and body in Jesus’ Precious Name. You shall not miss your true glory this year in Jesus’ Name!

    To have a peaceful relationship with your family member and others, you need the grace of God and this grace can only be given when you have identified with God in your relationship with Him.  You want to be born again? Why not say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom”.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Building trust in your relationship (2)

    DEAR Reader, You are welcome to a time of refreshing in God’s presence.  Last week, I taught on trust and this week, I want to teach on Relationship.

    What is Relationship?

    Relationship simply means association, contact and interaction with people. It means to be involved or to link up with somebody else. However, if your relationship with people must be successful, and not cause you problems but rather benefit you, then you need to understand and know yourself.

    Every relationship you are into has you as the principal actor. That is why a good understanding of yourself will help you to succeed in that relationship whether it is with a member of the opposite sex or someone of same gender. I have observed that many people don’t know themselves and have never really bothered to find out just who they are. They just want to focus on others and what they are doing well or not doing well. You need to take time to find out who you are.

    Relationship with God

    This kind of relationship only comes when you have given your life to Christ, and God becomes your Father. The Word of God says: Can two walk together, except they be agreed? (Amos 3:3). There is no way you can walk with God without being in an agreement with Him. Redemption is the only way to have a relationship with God. The Bible says: Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God (John 3:3).

    You and I were created for the pleasure of God. That means, the greatest relationship that you can have with anyone is with God. Once that relationship is intact, it will set a pace for your relationship with men (Revelation 4:11). Your relationship with God will always guarantee you wisdom, direction, peace, etc.

    Relationship with Others

    There are general rules for getting along with other people. These keys will work for you as you apply them.

    • Walk in love: It is the love of God that makes it possible for you to relate successfully with all categories of men, both the lovable and the unlovable. That love is made possible by the help of the Holy Spirit (Romans 5: 5-6).
    • Be understanding: Generally, people like to be understood. They want you to make an effort to understand why they do things the way they do them, their various temperaments, backgrounds, etc. You must strive to treat people the way you want to be treated.
    • Beware of invalid expectations: The reason many times we have misunderstandings with people is that our expectations are very high. We expect too much from people. People will always be people! You must make allowance for their errors and weaknesses.
    • Concentrate on the good: If you look carefully, you will observe that nobody is hundred percent perfect! Since that is the case, every one has weaknesses and strengths. So, you can either concentrate on their weaknesses or strengths per time. As such, we must learn to look beyond people’s mistakes.
    • Treat people well: A wise man once said, ‘What you make happen for others, God will make happen for you’. That means, if you treat people well, whether they repay you or not, God will make it happen for you!

    Relationship with members of your family

    A family comprises of a father, mother and children (it also includes relations or those living in your house). If you are a wife or a husband, you must realise that you can get along with your spouse. All you need to do is appreciate his/her place and each of your responsibilities as God has declared in His Word. Let the wife start by understanding the leadership role of her husband and give him his place. She should also make sure that she respects, obeys and submits to him. For the man, you must make sure that you love your wife passionately, deeply and expressively. You will not fail in Jesus’ name!

    To be able to relate with God and others, you need to surrender your life to Christ. You can do so by saying this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom”.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

  • Making a difference (3)

    DEAR Reader, It is a good thing to share God’s Word with you today. I have discussed with you the woman, as God’s last born and the productive woman. This week, I will yet go further to share with you what a woman of difference can be called. Her Children Call Her Blessed.

    One of the qualities that a woman with a difference has is the ability to train her children as described in Proverbs 31:28. The Word of God says: Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her (Proverbs 31:28). God expects that every remembrance of you by your children should be for good. They should someday rise up and without being compelled to, call you blessed.

    I want you to know that your children have been given to you as gifts from God (Psalm 127:3). God has entrusted their lives into your hands, giving you the privilege to steer them towards their destinies in life. You are, in essence, a privileged caretaker. The Word of God says:  Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).

    From the above scripture, you will discover that every child has the way he should go; it is the responsibility of the parents to put him on the right track. As women, we are generally closer to our children, and by nature, are very perceptive beings. It is, therefore, necessary for us to observe our children to know what they do best, where their strengths lie and what their weaknesses are, and help them discover the right vocation to pursue.

    Many women want to live out their dreams in their children. They want the child to be what they never could be. Others want to have a professional they can boast about: “My son is a doctor”. They compel the child to do what he has no liking and flair for.

    God is not a wicked God; He will not ask you to do what He has not given you the ability to do. All that is required to train up those children has been deposited into you. You need to arise to your responsibility as a woman and stop shifting your responsibility to others. Be determined to do what you must to bring them up aright. The Word of God says:  The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself brings his mother to shame (Proverbs 29:15).

    There is a need for women who do not want to be ashamed in the future to nurture their children in the fear of the Lord. I have discovered that although child-training should be a joint responsibility, the lion’s share of the work has to be done by mothers. Unfortunately for many ‘busy’ women, their children are a burden. So, you hear them say, when the children approach them: “Ah, you have come again; let me rest please!” But those children are blessings not burdens. The Word of God says:  See, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. Happy is the man that has his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate (Psalm 127:3, 5).

    The children God gave to you are supposed to make you happy. However, if you neglect the requirement of training them, rather than experience joy over them in the future, it could be regrets. That shall not be your portion in Jesus’ name! Some mothers blame their children’s misbehaviour on the bad company they keep. But they keep bad company because they cannot see good examples! Was Daniel not in the corrupt land of Babylon? Yet, the good example he received at home enabled him to purpose not to defile himself. What about Joseph? Even in Egypt, far away from the watchful eyes of his parents, he still would not sleep with Portiphar’s wife.

    To effectively raise your children as a woman, your feminity is a great asset. This is the quality that makes you tender-hearted, more compassionate and caring than a man. With it, you can meet the emotional needs of your children. Touch them, care for them, hug them and compliment them. It is the nature in a woman that makes her unable to bear the cry of her baby in the night. A man may sleep through it, but not a mother. The Word of God says:  Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Yes, they may forget, yet will I not forget you (Isaiah 49:15).

    When Abraham sent Hagar and Ishmael away, she got to a point where her water finished and she did not know what to do. The Bible says she moved away from the child, so that she will not watch him die. That’s feminity! It is a powerful tool in raising our children.

    The grace to carry out your responsibility as a good mother is available when you receive Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour. If you are ready for this, please say this prayer: Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan, to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour.  Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Making a difference

    HELLO Reader, I welcome you to this wonderful time in God’s presence. All through this month, I will be looking at the topic: Making a Difference. This week, I will be sharing with you a very vital topic which I titled, “The Woman as God’s Last Born”.

    It is very important that as a woman, you must know the purpose for which you are created. You are created to make a difference in your world. From Genesis Chapter 2, you will discover that after God created the woman, the work of creation stopped. God was satisfied. God saw His mission as accomplished. He knew that if the woman would perform her role as God’s last born, the world would become a different place.

    The woman at creation was the last to be created. She was not an after-thought. God made her last for specific reasons and purposes. We all know that naturally, the last born of a family enjoys more than the others. That is exactly what God has done with you as a woman. God has prepared you, the woman, as His last born and has prepared the best for you.  You will enjoy it!

    As a woman, you are the crown of God’s creation. For instance, if a king wants to put on his crown, he has to be completely dressed. His clothes, shoes and everything must be on; the last thing he put on is the crown. God has created you as His last born; you must make a difference. You will not be a misfit to God’s purpose.

    When you get born-again while your Father is a King, who are you as the King’s daughter? You are a princess. Every woman that is born-again is a princess and among other things, you are meant for honour. You will not miss the honour that is due to you in Jesus’ name!

    If you know that you are a princess, there will be differences between you and the people of the world. Your life and character will reflect Christ. If you see a woman that dresses carelessly, showing her total nakedness, she doesn’t know the daughter of whom she is.  If she knows, she will take proper care of her body as the temple of the Living God.  A woman that messes herself up with men, sleeping with any man she sees on the street, is taking away the honour that God has for her in marriage. Every honour that is due to you, from the beginning of creation, will not elude you in Jesus’ name!

    Women That Made Positive Difference in Their Days

    Sarah:   In the Old Testament, we see a woman known as Sarah; she was the wife of Abraham. Sarah was a woman of honour. The Word of God says: Through faith also Sara herself received strength to conceive seed, and was delivered of a child when she was past age, because she judged him faithful who had promised (Hebrews 11:11). God honoured her by giving her strength to bear a child, even though she has passed the age of child-bearing. God will honour you in Jesus’ name!

    Hannah: She was a woman of prayer (I Samuel 1).  Rather than going from house to house, gossiping all about, Hannah went to the house of God, prayed and her story changed.

    Elizabeth: She was the mother of John the Baptist. She was a woman of great character. She was barren, but she did not stop serving God.  She refused to give up and at the right time, God visited her (Luke 1).

    Priscilla: Her husband’s name was Aquila. The two of them were co-labourers in the Gospel (Acts 18). She was always working with the apostles. In several places in the New Testament, we see Paul mentioning her name, “Greet Priscilla and Aquila my co-labourers in the Kingdom”. She was a worker in the house of God and at the end of it, made a difference.

    Lydia:    She was a business woman. The Bible calls her a seller of purple (Acts 16).  She was a business woman that made the difference in her generation. She was useful. God opened her heart to receive the Word of God and she ministered to the apostles. The same way, God is looking for more Lydias in the Church today. May you be one!

    The Women Who Made Negative Difference in Their Days

    Job’s wife: The Bible simply called her Job’s wife because her name was not mentioned. Rather than being a help to her husband when he was undergoing challenges, she was a minus. She looked at her husband in the face and said, “Curse God and die!  What are you living for?” The spirit of the wife of Job will not find expression in your life in Jesus’ name!

    Portiphar’ Wife:                There is also this woman that the Bible calls Portiphar’s wife. We were not told her name. The problem of this woman was sex. She had the spirit of Jezebel. This woman was comfortable and all that she needed was available. She descended so low as to running after her house-help. She did not know that the beauty in Joseph’s life was the beauty of the inner man and thank God for Joseph, a man that has the fear of God. You will not end up as Portiphar’s wife! You are not married, what are you doing having sex? You are removing your honour with your hands. There are still some married women like Portiphar’s wife, who leave their husbands at home to go after small boys.  They are women without dignity.

    If you need God to make a difference in your life, then you must surrender your life to Christ. Please, say this prayer and be born again: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to you today as a sinner. Forgive me of my sins. I believe You died and rose on the third day for my sins. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour.  Make me a child of God today.  Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Secrets to marital bliss (5)

    DEAR Reader, A lot of times, people dream about a perfect home where joy, peace, abundance and fruitfulness abound. Such dreams are good, if you determine to do what is required to realize it. Just as physically you cannot own a home by mere wishing. If you plan on having a glorious family, stop wishing and prepare to play your part. You must accept responsibility for the building of your family. God’s Word says: Every house is built by some man… (Hebrews 3:4). This week, I will be teaching on Commitment.

    Husband, wife, are you committed to your marriage, home and relationship? Many people have entered into marriage thinking they might as well give it a trial. After the first attraction dies and the work of making a happy marriage begins, they begin to wonder if they have not married the wrong person.

     

    Three fold-cord of commitment

    Commitment to God

    When you commit yourself to Christ, Christ commits Himself to you. 2 Timothy 1:12 says: For the which cause I also suffer these things: nevertheless I am not ashamed: for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day.

    A husband and wife, who are committed to the Lord Jesus Christ and to doing the will of God, are walking in the light (1 John 1:7). This brings great stability into marriage and family life.

    Since it is God who instituted the family, it is only reasonable that He occupies a central part in your marriage and family life. God must be in the life of both parties. Marriage is an institution designed by God. So, it cannot be successful when God is ignored. After accepting Jesus Christ as your Saviuor, you have the love of God shed abroad in your heart and you can truly love others (Romans 5:5).

     

    Commitment To Your Spouse

    The second strand in the three-fold cord of commitment is permanent commitment to your spouse. Men and women, our nation and churches desperately need strong families. Marriage is a lifetime commitment. When I speak of commitment, I am not referring to some form of passive past commitment that was based on hormones and emotions. Rather, I am referring to the daily exercise of love (1 Corinthians 13). I am referring to the husband taking the time to get to know his wife and communicating with her (1 Peter 3:7-10). I am talking about building the kind of a relationship together, so that you enjoy being together and after years of marriage, you are still ravished with her love.

    A blissful marriage requires commitment to your spouse.  When you neglect this, no amount of prayer and fasting and ‘sleeping’ in church can prevent your home from falling apart.

     

    Commitment To Your Children

    The final strand in the three-fold cord is a commitment to your children. As parents, you must be committed in training and providing for your children.

    In conclusion, Commitment to God begins with Salvation. This comes by surrendering your life to Christ. You surrender by confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as your Saviour and Lord.  If you are ready to be born again, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.” If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores:

     

    Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).