It has been 29 days since President Bola Ahmed Tinubu fell flat on his face while ascending the podium to make a highly-anticipated speech on June 12, Nigeria’s second national democracy day since his inauguration as President on 29 May, last year. All eyes were on him as he strode towards the microphone to address the nation. He stumbled and fell, but quickly sprang up. He immediately dusted his dress and made a joke of the fall, saying he prostrated to the honour of Nigeria’s fallen heroes of democracy. Many observers expected him to be bedridden that evening or the next day, but he hosted a dinner that evening and was active the following day. This must have embarrassed his political foes, who may have wanted to use the fall as ammunition to question his physical fitness, just as they did during the presidential campaign last year using computers to slur his speeches and responses during interviews.
I have had several serious falls myself, each one serious enough to break my bones, but none ever did. I have learned many lessons about how to manage falls without after effects. I am happy to share some of them.
If there is a good supplement or plant medicine I always like to keep in my emergency or first aid medicine box, it is Maria Treben Bitters.
It is made from a secret formula passed down to humanity through Maria Treben, the legendary Austrian herbalist of our time, now of blessed memory. Originally, the formula belonged to Dr. Samts, who died at the age of 103 after falling off his horse during a riding exercise. At the age of 88, he gave the formula to Maria Treben, the flag bearer of several testimonials of these Swedish bitters. Maria Treben released to humanity the 42 uses of this non-alcoholic preparation with no preservatives, as stated in the Old Manuscript which she published in her book, Help Through God’s Pharmacy. When I learned of President Bola Ahmed Tinubu’s fall at Eagle Square on June 12, Nigeria’s Democracy Day, I wished he and his wife, Remi, knew of Maria Treben and this brand of bitters. This is because it has bailed me out of several dangerous events, such as the president’s fall, and more. Mr. Sam Tunde Ayeni introduced Maria Bitters to me several years ago. At that time, he was doing business with Dr. Udo Erasmus, author of Fat That Heals And Fat That Kills.
This book resolved the fat question and debate among Euro-Americans. The debate, fermented in the 1980s, revolved around which dietary fat could cause heart disease, heart attacks, blood vessel damage, and strokes. Palm oil and coconut oil were caught in the crossfire. Euro-Americans saw no value in them for cardiovascular health and sought to promote soya beans oil, abundant in the United States, as the oil that could safeguard health. However, the Caribbeans, strong in food and plant medicine research, later vindicated coconut oil, plentiful in their country. Palm oil also received reprieve from Americans themselves. Dr. Erasmus differentiated between fats that heal and those that harm, exposing killer factors in industrial oil extraction processes.
When I reviewed his book in the 1990s and early 2000s, many readers of this column in Cross River and Akwa Ibom states rejoiced that their son was making waves in nutrition abroad. They thought I had mistakenly left out the “h” in the name of their second male child, “UDOH”! I retell this story to avoid this impression in the present column. Dr. Udo Erasmus, a Pole who naturalised in the United States, was brought to Nigeria by Mr. Ayeni for a health seminar hosted by HAVILLAH health food store in Lagos. Following this, a wide range of nutritional supplements bearing Dr. Erasmus’ name appeared in the Nigerian market, courtesy of Mr. Ayeni’s efforts. The success of these supplements, especially UDO’s OIL, led him to partner with the producers of BRAGG brand Apple Cider Vinegar (ACV). Unfortunately, pirates hijacked the products despite registration with NAFDAC, a situation that persists to this day.
Other testimonials
•Mrs. Felicia Baderinwa (also known as Mrs. Whyte) of Agege, Lagos, used Maria Bitters to treat a split toe she got when she accidentally stepped on an iron gate hook. The injury healed quickly. Impressed, Mrs. Whyte introduced me to a mother whose baby had a severe abscess from an injection. Despite trying various remedies, the abscess persisted. I suggested Maria Treben Bitters, and after massaging it into the affected area, the swelling disappeared within two weeks.
• While inspecting the construction of my house, a long metal range fell from an upstairs window and hit me right on the forehead. I saw stars and felt a swelling forming. I went to my car for a bottle of Maria Bitters and I massaged some of the content into the affected area intermittently for about 30 minutes and experienced no pain thereafter.
• One evening, I fell into an open drainage, shortly after I disembarked from a tricycle (Marwa). I stepped aside for it to move on. It werved towards me. I pulled backwards a little, unkown to me that I stood near the drainage. This event took place near the entrance gate of the housing estate where I lived. My head hit the concrete wall, and my legs were caught by the outer wall. Security staff helped me out, and although I was aching all over, I used ice block therapy and massaged the affected areas with Maria Bitters all night. To my surprise, I felt absolutely normal the next day.
• I was hit by a motorcycle ridden by a policeman while crossing the road to Home Taste Kitchen in Agege, Lagos. That was where I always loved to have lunch whenever I was in Agege. I always waited for traffic to stand still on one side of the two-lane road before I crossed to Home Taste. That day, traffic on the lane closer to Home Taste stood still. I had no trouble crossing over to eat. It was beyond my imagination that a motor cycle would be ridden in against the traffic which had stool still. What I observed in a jiffy were the handles of a motorcycle from which I had no time to dodge. The motorcycle lifted and knocked me against a truck beside which I stood. The impact left me bruised and bleeding on the road. I feared I may have broken a bone, especially my right femur which got fractured in 1966 in Ibadan when a taxi knocked down. I also worried about my spinal cord. The “area boys” rescued me and held the policeman accountable. I was taken to the hospital to rule out internal bleeding and later returned to Home Taste for lunch. I then went to my office to get a bottle of Maria Bitters, which I used to massage the affected areas that night and the next day. I recovered quickly, except for some bruising that Mrs. Hannah Korede helped nurse.
• In another incident at a rowdy bus-stop, a Marwa ran over one of my feet, causing it to feel hot and peppery. I removed my shoe and dabbed the foot with Maria Bitters, which provided relief. I have had three more experiences with Maria Bitters since then.
• One of my last memorable personal experiences took place one evening at Pen Cinema, Agege round-about beside the Taste Fried Chicken complex. I was crossing the Taste Fried Chicken end of the road when a power bicycle ridden, again, by a policeman approached me from behind, knocking me to one side while the rider and the bike fell on another. Meanwhile, the headlamps of a car were advancing. I crossed on my buttocks to the Midian of the road afterwards, gathered myself, ignored apologies from the irresponsible law-breaking policeman, and treated myself at home, with no default or defects on the following day as usual.
• I will never forget a young tiler and his boss who worked in my house. They were tiling the stairway. Minutes earlier, I had complained to them that I did not like the way they left the granite cutting saw by the porch doorway. They ignored the complaint. Suddenly, a cry of agony rang out. His boss and I rushed out of the house to see him. Accidentally, and forgetfully, he stepped on the live cutting saw with his bare foot. The saw cut his foot deep, almost separating it into two parts. He was bleeding profusely and shouting. I asked his boss to clean the wound with water while I went to bring Maria Treben Bitters. I poured almost a quarter of the content into the deep cut, and soon the bleeding stopped. We hired a tricycle that took him to Merit Hospital, where Dr. Moss, a Ghanaian, attended to him. He did not agree to let Dr. Moses stitch the parts together. He was given another treatment and discharged. I was afraid he could lose his foot, but to my surprise, he did not till this day.
• Before her marriage, Mrs. Hannah Korede worked with me. She was with my sister when I visited her one day in Shomolu. She began to complain of menstrual cramps. Suddenly, her protestation assumed alarming proportions. Immediately, I called her husband-to-be, Mr. Korede, on the telephone. Before he came, I gave my sister a bottle from which she massaged the Bitters into Hannah’s irritated, cramping and sore abdomen. He met her about 30 minutes later in deep sleep. Where Maria Treben Bitters is not readily available, Liquid magnesium may perform this miracle as well.
A few days later, I invited some friends, including Mr. Danson Sunday Danson from Uyo, to have drinks with me to which I added some of the bitters. Some almost broke their drinking glasses in fury. Till this day, Danson avoids the bitters. It is bitter to some persons, but not to me, otherwise, I would not add half or one capful to my teeth-cleaning preparation, which includes turmeric, diatom, clove powder or oil, natural salt, and pollutant-free toothpaste.
• My Palm Grove Bus-stop experience is unforgettable. I closed from my office on Town Planning Way in Ilupeju, Lagos, and boarded a bus from Palm Grove. I was to cross over to the other side of the 10-lane Ikorodu Road using a footbridge and from there board another bus to Shomolu to see my sister as I did every evening before heading home. The bus that brought me to Palm Grove disembarked passengers about 20 metres from the bus-stop due to a traffic jam. It was dark, and the walkway was rough, littered with huge volcanic stones that I sighted too late when I hurried to get out of the way of a vehicle rushing from behind me, hooting. I fell, full face, as we say, my right knee heavily rammed into one of the ragged stones. I saw stars. I thought my knee cap was fractured. I was sweating. Some good Samaritans came to lift me up and took me to the landing of the footbridge, where someone poured cool water over my head. In about 15 minutes, I regained some strength and was strong enough to slowly find my way to the other side of the road, aborted my visit to Shomolu, and boarded a bus back home. In my routine, I performed the Maria Treben Bitters rituals…and went to bed. In the morning, I hardly remembered events of the evening before.
The President
If President Bola Ahmed Tinubu had not heard of Maria Treben Bitters, the foregoing testimonial should spur him to keep bottles in the Aso Rock Villa and take them along during his travels in and outside Nigeria. There are no fewer than 42 uses of this product which is specially formulated without alcohol or any other preservative according to “the old manuscript”. He is a busy man and, like all very busy persons, may come under stress now and then and experience pain in different parts of the body, especially in the joints. Many old persons who have to frequently over-work their knee joints nowadays wear Quantum Energy knee pad. This energise the knee joint. They may not need to wear the knee pad to bed. During such free periods, they may generously massage the knee joints or any other joints with Maria Treben Bitters. I cut my hair low, so I massage deep into my scalp after a hard day’s work, before bed. Nowadays, I have quantum energy water spray bottles, and I dilute the bitters with water or keep them whole in any of these bottles. Quantum energy minerals in the bottle energise the contents. Energised water, for example, activates the human cells they come into contact with. I spray energised water into my eyes, mouth, gums, teeth, in any painful area of the body, on food and drinks to energise them. I use the water and bitters as an after-shave, deodorant, scalp massage, foot massage, prophylactic to prevent athlete’s foot, and sometimes as a massage for the entire body, including bone joints, especially those in the knee. What I do not fail to do when I can afford it is to add one or two capful of Maria Treben Bitters to my bath water in the bucket or bath. The skin absorbs the healing energy in the bitters and calms the nerves .
According to a report, the old manuscript mentions that Maria Treben Bitters can treat Digestive issues, Constipation, Diarrhea, Indigestion, Nausea, Vomiting, Heartburn, Sore throats, Coughs, Cold and flu, Fever, Headaches, Migraines, Menstrual cramps, Menstrual irregularities, PMS symptoms, Skin issues (acne, eczema, etc.), Wound healing, Insect bites, Burns, Sunburn, Muscle pain, Joint pain, Arthritis, Rheumatism, Gout, Sciatica, Back pain, Neck pain, Shoulder pain, Knee pain, Ankle pain, Foot pain, Hand pain, Finger pain, Toothache, Gum inflammation, Bad breath, Body odour, Foot fungus, Athlete’s foot, and Skin fungus.
Additionally, Maria Treben Bitters are used for: Detoxification Liver and gallbladder issues, Kidney stones, Urinary tract infections, Prostate issues, Hemorrhoids, Stress and anxiety, Insomnia, Fatigue, Allergies, Asthma, Bronchitis, Cancer support,Immune system support.
“ It is important to note that some of these uses may require dilution with water or other preparations, and it’s important to consult with a healthcare professional before using Maria Treben Bitters for any health issue”.
