Category: Saturday Magazine

  • ‘Why we are clamouring for the creation of Adada State’

    ‘Why we are clamouring for the creation of Adada State’

    Barrister Paul Eze is the President of Nsukka Zonal Citizens, Abuja, a pan-Igbo pressure group out to see the actualisation of the creation of Adada State from the present Enugu State. In this interview with Sanni Onogu in Abuja, he explains why the creation of the state is long overdue. Excerpts: 

    When did the clamour for the creation of Adada State begin?

    It began formally in 1983. It came to the limelight through a motion moved in the House of Representatives by Hon. Yenusa Kaltungo from Bauchi State. Since then, the request has gathered momentum, involving the Enugu State Government, policy makers, professional bodies, students, and even market women in Enugu North Senatorial District of Enugu State. When the Second Republic ended, the request was once more represented before the Mbanefo Panel on state and local government creation and boundary adjustment in 1996. The committee considered the request, but the creation of Ebonyi State was favoured.

    The Obasanjo administration in 2005 also convened a conference to reform political issues in Nigeria. The Political Reform Committee in its submission unflinchingly agreed to create a new state in the South East to bring the region at par with other geopolitical zones in Nigeria. It may interest you to know that some geopolitical zones already have seven states while the South East only has five. At its deliberation in the National Assembly in 2005, the request for Adada enjoyed full support. Also in 2006, the South East Caucus of the National Assembly, ably led by former Senate President Ken Nnamani, inaugurated a 10-man committee of senators and House Representatives members from the five states of the South East under the chairmanship of Senator Ifeanyi Ararume. They deliberated in Owerri on March 26, 2006 with former Imo Governor Achike Udenwa playing the host.

    At that forum, there were requests for state creation. The demands were on Aba, Adada, Njaba and Orashi states. The committee called for voting to ensure democracy and justice in determining which one to choose. Past and present governors from the zone, speakers of state houses of assembly, leaders of Ohanaeze Ndigbo, political leaders among others participated in the voting. The results, which you can verify, reads thus: Adada, 5; Orachi, 3; Aba, 2, and Njaba, 0. For your information, Adada is the oldest request ever and the most persistent in the old Eastern Nigeria.

    There are so many demands for state creation from the South East zone. Why do you think it must be Adada?

    The proposed Adada State is densely populated, although there are only seven local government areas in the zone. That is another imbalance calling for redress. These local government areas are Igbo-Etiti, Uzo-Uwani, Isi-Uzo, Nsukka, Udenu, Igbo-Eze North and Igbo-Eze South. Adada constitutes over 49 per cent of the current Enugu State. The cultural affinity, unanimity of purpose to live together and quest for self-determination ignited the request for its creation. In fact, since 1906, the proposed Adada State has been administered as one unit either as a district or a province. This is the only old province in the entire Eastern Nigeria that is not yet made a state.

    The creation of Adada State will also usher in internal political balance within the Igbo of the South-East geopolitical zone and a balance between the South East and other five geopolitical zones. Igbo land has two divisions: North and South. This was emphasised in 1970 during the demand for Wawa State. These divisions have equal landmass and equal population. Currently, there are three states in the Southern Igbo wing, namely Abia, Anambra and Imo. The North has only Enugu and Ebonyi states. This goes to show that Adada will bring equity and ensure political equality both in the South East at large and its internal structure.

    Many states today are finding it difficult to pay salaries. Do you think Adada State could be self-sustaining if created?

    It is the hub of skilled man power in Nigeria. It houses the University of Nigeria. There are other higher institutions which I may not mention yet. Nsukka Urban alone has over 200 private and public schools. The area also has abundant fertile land for commercial farming. Rivers Adada, Amayi, Ubene and Obina can give the entire Nigeria food if irrigation facilities are put in place. The giant World Bank Rice and Ada Rice, all located at Uzo Uwani, are just a tip of the iceberg. There is also the famous NALDA Farm in Agu Ukehe in Igbo Etiti, and the Enugu State Irrigation Farm at Ete Igboeze North; Okpuje Federal Piggery Project to mention a few. Adada can boast of abundant production of rice, yam, cassava, maize, beans, cashew fruit, palm oil plantation and other cash crops. In the area of tourism, there are lakes, springs and waterfalls in Nsukka, Igbo Etiti and Igbo Eze South local government areas.

    In the area of mineral resources, Adada has many oil fields at Nsukka. Crude oil production has commenced at Igga and Ukpatu in Uzo Uwani and in Ehalumona. Ezimo in Udenu has a large deposit of coal, kerosene and glass.

    Do you have the support of your state government?

    We have the blessings of Governor Sullivan Chime in every ramification. There is a committee in the state called the Adada State Actualisation Committee with the mandate of making this request a reality. Again, the Enugu State House of Assembly on 24 April, 2008 passed a resolution supporting the creation of Adada State.

  • Sex is good for you (adults only)

    According to male legend Arnold Schwarzenegger ‘The best activities for your health are humping and pumping’. In many ways this is true; safe sex does have lots of health benefits. Those who have sex once or twice a week have been shown to have higher levels of immunoglobulin A or IgA, an antibody which helps protect you from respiratory diseases like the cold and flu. Also researchers have found that men in their 20s who had five or more ejaculations per week were one third less likely to develop prostate cancer in later life. It would seem Mr Schwarzenegger is on to something.

    Get active to get more sex Everyone wants more sex and we know how you can get it. Dr Helen Fisher, biological anthropologist at Rutgers University explains that ‘People fall in love when dopamine levels rise in their brains’. This is the neurotransmitter that controls the brain’s reward and pleasure centres. You can only get more dopamine by doing two things: the first is to have more sex. The second is to recreate a rush of dopamine by doing an exciting activity, such as bungee jumping, flying in a helicopter or even doing something simple like climbing a tree. Once you have raised your partner’s levels of dopamine, they will want to have sex with you more.

    Morning sex is best When we think of having a romantic encounter with that special someone, we often think of moonlight hitting silk sheets or candles flickering in a seductive, half-lit room. However, our bodies may be more attuned to having sex in the morning. Men’s testosterone levels peak in the morning and so men become more easily aroused at this time. Although many men wake up erect anyway, this does not actually mean they are sexually aroused – but what better way to start a day, be it giving or receiving.

    Men enjoy sex more When you’re under the covers, who is enjoying sex more; you or him? Interestingly this is not a new debate. In Ancient Greek mythology Hera complained to Zeus that he got more pleasure from their sex than she did. According to a new study, it is possible that Hera was telling the truth. Researchers at the John Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, found that nearly nine out of 10 young men reported having an orgasm most or all of the time they have sex with their partner. However, less than half of young women experience orgasm that frequently when they have sex with their partner.

    Our bodies show when we want to have sex Women give several physical clues when they want to have sex. Firstly, when a woman is aroused her pupils will dilate. If a woman sees a man who she likes when out, but does not know him, she will give him prolonged eye contact. Her lips will also purse and if she repeatedly gazes at his lips then it is very likely that she wants him. However, if a woman crosses her legs or arms and repeatedly looks away from a man, he’s just not in there.

    He used to have a clitoris Once upon a time, it would seem we were not all that different from each other. In the first trimester of pregnancy, the fetus is gender neutral, being neither male nor female. However, the fetus has all the makings of a clitoris and vagina. It is not until eight to 12 weeks have passed that males become distinct.

  • Ways to keep your relationship fresh

    Every relationship has its point where things begin to seem a bit…well…dull. When you first start dating, the excitement of getting to know someone new, trying new things and having new experiences is exhilarating and helps to keep the spark alive. But after a while when the “new” hype has died down, we look for other ways to spice things up in our relationship. Instantly we think, the bedroom! But spicing things up between you and your boyfriend doesn’t necessarily have to mean amping up your sex life. Staying connected is what’s most important, in whatever way possible. Although I am all for keeping things hot in the bedroom, here are a few ways that you and your boyfriend can keep the relationship fresh by staying connected. Trying out at least a few of these tips will be sure to give your relationship the face lift it’s been needing:

    Keep It Routine: Although spontaneity is great, having some sort of weekly routine keeps you guys on track too. Sometimes, trying to find a moment of spontaneity with such a busy schedule is hard to do. Developing some sort of routine, even something as simple as doing laundry together every Sunday, can be a good way to spend some down time together.

    Go Somewhere: Take a small weekend getaway together. Sometimes a change of scenery is all you really need to keep things fresh.

    Keep It Together: Consider taking part in those activities you love but assume your partner hates, i.e.: attending a sporting event with him, or taking him shopping with you. Don’t torture each other, make it a comfortable experience. Use this as an opportunity to show that you really care about each others likes and dislikes, and are willing to step out of the box for one another!

    Fight It Out: Pick one day a month to really have it out with one another. That’s right, schedule a fight. Go out of your way to keep the peace for as long as possible, and use that one day to vent about all that’s been bothering you. Although it’s practically impossible to “plan” your emotions, planning a day to air it out might be a good way to know when the heat is coming.

    Sext It Out: Sexting might not be the brightest idea if you’re sending half-naked pictures of yourself to a guy you’re just hooking up with, but sexting with your boyfriend can really keep things exciting in the bedroom—and it will eliminate those awkward “here’s what I like and here’s what i want you to do to me” moments when you’re all riled up and ready to go.

    Claim a Place: A rock, a tree, a bench, a park, any place that you and your boyfriend can call your own will give a bit of tangibility to your relationship. Make memories there. You’ll be surprised how something so simple as claiming a place as your own will keep the two of you connected.

    Keep it Old Fashioned: Sitting down and having an old fashioned conversation with one another can prove to be a lot more rewarding than you’d think. Eliminate all of the everyday distractions; the cell phones, iPods, gadgets and whatever other noise that will inhibit your ability to give each other your full undivided attention, and just talk. Getting to know someone is an ongoing process, and however close you think you may know your boyfriend, you’ll surely discover something new simply by listening. Kill two birds with one stone by having your talk at the new place you’ve claimed, or during that weekend trip you guys are planning.

  • To have and to hold … for 87 years! World’s longest married couple share their secrets to living happily ever after

    Karam, 107, and Katari, 100, have been married for 87 years. They have eight children and 28 grandchildren together. The marriage is almost 5 years longer than current Guinness record holders.

    Couple say that laughter and looking after each other is key to marriage

    In an age where few marriages endure the test of time, 107-year-old Karam and his wife Katari Chand, 100, are proof that happy ever after does exist.

    The pair say that the key to success is looking after each other in every way possible: ‘My trick is to make Katari laugh. I like to tell jokes and make her smile. Being funny is my way of being romantic.’ says Karam.

    Karam and Katari Chand have been married for 87 years and are in the process of being confirmed as Guinness World Record holders for the world’s longest marriage

    ‘I have been told laughing makes you live longer… my wife is still alive so it must have worked! I love her so much and I want to spend another 80 years by her side,’ said Karam.

    From romantic meals to sharing jokes, the couple, who hail from Punjab, India and now live in Bradford ensure that they do little things for each other to keep the romance alive.

    Katari said: ‘When I was young I used to make him a nice fresh meal every night. We are vegetarian so I brought lots of fresh vegetables and made sure he was eating healthy food.

    ‘Health is very important and I wanted to look after him so we could grow old together. Some would say it has worked!

    ‘Oh and how can I forget, I always save a bit of my chapatti for him. Just a little gesture that he appreciated a lot and it kept me a bit slimmer.’

    Karam, who likes to do a word search every day to keep his mind alive, believes that spending plenty of time together has helped their marriage last.

    ‘We have not spent any long span apart in over 50 years. We go everywhere together – up until a few years ago we went to India every year with the family and for all family weddings we make sure we get to stay together,’ he said.

    Their marriage has lasted nearly five years longer than that of the current Guinness World Record holders and the couple are in the process of getting confirmation from the company that they will be named as the new record holders.

    Many modern day romances fail to stand the test of time but longevity and experience makes Karam the best man to go to for relationship advice.

    ‘In the past people used to listen. Now I don’t think people take the time to listen to each other properly. People seem too busy today with work, TV and other stuff going on around them.

    ‘Relationships are about understanding one another and listening to concerns and problems, so my advice to men and women is to listen to their partners, show interest in what they are saying and help them overcome any worries or problems they are going through,’ he said.

    The couple love to make each other laugh and will have a joint birthday celebration in November

    And their son Satpaul, who is extremely proud of his parent’s relationship, added his own words of wisdom.

    He said: ‘One piece of advice that I can’t stress enough is to keep your parents very close. We live with them in Bradford and look after them because we want to help them live as long as they can together.

    ‘I don’t want to see their love story end. I truly believe that by helping them over the last few years we have enabled them to enjoy their time together with no stress and being looked after.

    ‘Also, you have to value them while they are here because you never know how long they are going to be around for.’ Source: The Mail

  • La Campagne boss re-appointed African Tourism Ambassador

    The proprietor of La Campagne Tropicana Resort, Ikegun, Lagos State, Otunba Wanle Akinboboye has been re-appointed Tourism Ambassador for Africa by the World Conference of Mayors. Akinboboye was re-appointed at the recently held meeting of the body in Guinea.

    The body said it chose the development of tourism as a viable tool and option for the development of the continents, especially the continent of Africa with the belief that what can greatly and positively affect the development of Africa is tourism. Two seasoned personalities were elected to midwife their pet projects aimed at fostering development throughout the world.

    Ambassador Thomas Masters, Mayor of Riviera Beach, Florida is to direct the association’s affairs as its Tourism Ambassador for the Americas and Europe, whilst Otunba Wanle Akinboboye to direct its affairs as Tourism Ambassador for the continent of Africa and Co-chair of its Corporate Roundtable.

    The underlying factor being that Africa will be transformed into a world destination if a chunk of the over USD 60 billion spent annually by African-Americans travelling to destinations all over the world, but not to Africa, could be harnessed and channeled into the continent on a recurrent basis. The ripple effect of this on the African economy will greatly foster prosperity of Africa and Africans.

    The collective economic base of the African-American citizens living in the United States of America is conservatively put at USD 900 billion. Many of the particiapnts see tha appointment as an honour to West Africa as the region has been given the privilege of having one its citizen elected as the Tourism Ambassador.

    The World Conference of Mayors is an umbrella body for the association of Mayors worldwide. It was founded by Mayor Johnny Ford, of Tuskegee, Alabama, USA in 1984 for the promotion and fostering of unity and development amongst cities all over the world. In accordance with its charter, the association elected important dignitaries who will oversee its developmental projects/programmes on every continent from time to time. The body comprises 22,000 (twenty-two thousand) Mayors worldwide out of which 12,000 (twelve thousand) are Americans. Of this number, 650 (six hundred and fifty) are African-American Mayors who collectively preside over 48 to 50 million American citizens.

  • Unique culinary experience at Lagos Airport Hotel

    The Lagos Airport Hotel is currently offering a unique culinary experience for both in-house guests and visitors. This was disclosed by the hotel’s Controller, Food and Beverages, Mrs. Biola Famigbelu.

    She said the hotel’s restaurants, O’odua and Olumo Restaurants, in its tradition, of offering unique hospitality service, have put together unique local and continental dishes that takes into consideration every kind of guests. Her words: “ We have both The O’Odua and Olumo Restaurants. Olumo is our exclusive ala carte restaurant. At Olumo Restaurant you can choose from the menu of the day and it will be prepared, both local and continental.

    “The O’odua Restaurant offers buffet with cafeteria service. We started with a buffet service in 2005, thereafter we weighed the cost and changed to this particular services. On the table we provide variety of food. We take of everybody including those that have health challenges. We have special dishes for them, it is there. If, for example, we have a diabetic person that wants to take her breakfast, from what is on the table the person could conveniently take his or her breakfast and be okay. If we have an ulcer patient, the person could also have a tailor-made dishes.

    “There are very few hotels that render this kind of service, this is in addition to the fact that ours is bread and breakfast. Where other hotels offer such services, they give only continental breakfast not our normal breakfast with full compliment, which is what Lagos Airport Hotel offers.”

    She said as part of the on-going renovation and upgrading in the hotel, the restaurants will soon be refurbished and facilities upgrading to add more of aesthetics and create an ambience that would go hand in hand with the unique culinary experience the restaurants offer.

  • Governor Dickson, President Zuma & investment fever in Bayelsa

    Last month, precisely Friday, October 26, Governor Henry Seriake Dickson of Bayelsa State and his Investment Team stormed Johannesburg, the business capital of South Africa on the invitation of President Jacob Zuma. This visit and the power-packed Investment summit which held at the Hilton Hotel upped the ante in the vortex of investment in Bayelsa State.

    The October meeting was sequel to the governor’s visit to the country in May where he and his team wooed investors to the state.  These businessmen are expected to replicate some of the infrastructure that make South Africa a strong economy in Bayelsa State. This novel drive of Hon. Dickson  is hinged on his belief that Bayelsa has a lot to tap from the South African economy which he describes as having all the trappings of a first world economy.

    Expectedly, the governor’s first port of call was the South African State House in Pretoria. President Zuma was at the University of Pretoria where he was delivering a lecture in an occasion put together to honour the longest serving president of African National Congress (ANC), late Oliver Thambo and others. When he was told that  Governor Dickson had arrived, there was no other way the South African strongman could have honoured the countryman – governor than to cut short his engagement after his speech and cruise to his office to receive the governor and his team. We had lunch with Mr. President and went straight to the business of our visit which lasted for thirty minutes though memorable.

    The governor thanked President Zuma for offering credible leadership to South Africans and conveyed the greetings of President Goodluck Jonathan to him. Governor Dickson informed his host that he is currently emulating his party, the African National Congress (ANC) by running Bayelsa State from the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) headquarters in Yenagoa at least once in every month. The governor advised African leaders to go beyond ‘‘political integration to integrate our people economically because it is when we build a strong economic base for our people that we can put food on their table.’’  While rolling out the investment potentials of his state, the governor proclaimed that government has put in place time-tested insurance policies for all investors and investment. He said his government has turned the state into a construction site by embarking on massive road networks, the construction of Deep Sea Port in Angge, modern airport in Yenagoa and other  infrastructural drives, adding that unlike in the last five years, the state now has enough savings to meet up with contractual agreements and cater for the rainy day. What appeared to have impressed President Zuma significantly was the free education policy of Bayelsa State and the fact that the country-man governor did not go to the capital market to finance these lofty projects and programmes.

    Responding, President Zuma praised Dickson for enthroning probity and accountability in the governance culture of Bayelsa State. He also eulogized the governor for investing heavily in infrastructure and urged top South African businessmen to take advantage of the conducive business environment provided by Governor Dickson to invest in the littoral state.

    The President said all was set for the South African Infrastructure Development Cooperation (IDC) to sign a Memorandum of Understanding (MoU) with Bayelsa State Government in November this year on capacity building. While relishing the bond between Governor Dickson and Bayelsans, the president enjoined the governor to sustain his love for his people because according to him, ‘‘a good politician must always be in touch with his people because politics starts and ends with them.’’ He promised to visit Bayelsa State next year.

    After the courtesy call, the governor and his team hosted what a pundit tagged “Mega Investment Forum at the Hilton Hotel in Johannesburg where the potentials of the glory of all lands were laid bare.  Dickson went down memory lane on why it was crucial for his state to partner with South Africa and assured investors of having a return for their money in Bayelsa State. He, however, warned brief case businessmen and contractors to keep off from his state.

    He averred that he is the first governor in Nigeria to have enacted Compulsory Savings Law and Transparency and Accountability Law which make it compulsory for government to save money for the state and render account to the people of the state because in his words: ‘Tthe electorate have the right to know the resources accruing to the state and how they are spent, which to me, is a cardinal principal of democracy.’’ The governor said these laws and his approach to governance have enthroned probity, transparency, accountability and paradigm shift in governance, a development he stressed has won the confidence of the international community for the state, thereby attracting investors from the West to Bayelsa.

    He, however, averred that the South African investors still have crucial roles to play in his state because according to him, ‘‘we want to integrate Africa economically and build African economy with Africans as drivers and in doing so, we have a lot to tap from the South African investors.’’

    Being one of the most peaceful states in the country as a result of the tight security network put in place by government, the governor said Bayelsa State is safe and waiting to be tapped by investors.

    Aside being the highest producer of oil and gas in the country, the governor told his audience that the glory of all lands offers a variety of investment opportunities in nine sectors such as agriculture, energy, fisheries, infrastructure, manufacturing, research, solid minerals, tourism, transportation and many more.

    The governor declared: ‘‘We have a mandate of our people which is firmly anchored on restoration and development of Bayelsans. To effectively do these, we must diversify our economy to be agro-business and tourism based. Luckily, the land and climate in Bayelsa State support tourism and the cultivation of both food and cash crops which include oil palm, rice, plantation, banana, yams, coco yam, cocoa, sweet potatoes, pineapple, cassava, sugar cane, coconut and many others.’’

    The South African Government was represented at the  investment forum by the First Lady, Mrs Nompumelo Ntuli Zuma and the South African Deputy Minister of Economic Planning, Professor Elizabeth Thabelth Mukezi. The Minister looked forward to the signing of MoU between South African Infrastructure Development Corporation and Bayelsa State and emphasized the willingness of South Africa to partner with Bayelsa State because in her words: ‘‘Governor Dickson has put in place in-built parameters that are likely to make his state an investor’s destination.’’ While declaring that the procurement system in her country has undergone reforms, she urged the Bayelsa State Government to tighten up the procurement mechanism, a process, she claimed is often abused to perpetrate fraud in the system in Africa. The Bayelsa initiative was unique in a number of ways: it was the first time that the South African First Lady would personally attend and endorse an investment summit organized by a Nigerian state government. Similarly, Bayelsa is the first and only state in Nigeria to enjoy President Zuma’s endorsement of its development plan.

    The organized private sector, renowned entrepreneurs,  top business men and investors drawn from South Africa and other Southern African countries participated actively in the forum. Prominent among them were Mr. Bart Dorrestein, Chairman Legacy Group Holding, owners of Michelangelo Towers, Davinci Hotel, Raphael Apartment Suites, Michelangelo Hotels and Nelson Mandela Square. Others were Mr. Bongani Maseko, Managing Director, Airport Company of South Africa, owners of all the airports in South Africa, operators of international airports in India, Bombay, Sao Paulo, Brazil and Mr. Thulani Gcabashe, CEO of Built Africa, a leading Energy/Power companies.

    The interaction was rounded off with a dinner featuring an American international gospel singer, Dr. Jaunita Bynum who is scheduled to storm the Bayelsa State Thanksgiving Day holding on November 2.

    The climax of the Investment forum was the signing of letters of cooperation with Naidoo and Associates Consulting Engineers and Construction Management Company and the Black Business Council which represents the 5th African Black Business Community. The governor also inspected the Bayelsa Development Corporation office billed to be commissioned in January.

    Agbo, a Nigerian-based journalist and public affairs analyst, wrote in from South Africa

  • Bride of winter (3)

    I arrived London on a bitterly cold, winter evening. Henry met me at the airport and took me to his house which was quite far from Heathrow. I was so happy to see him that I could hardly sit still in the car which was heated because of the cold. It seemed the cold had also driven most people off the streets which looked deserted as we drove along.

    “Where’s everybody?” I enquired as we drove along the well-lit streets. The few pedestrians I saw were all bundled up in thick jackets and walked very fast as if in great haste to get home.

    “Mostly indoors, I guess. It’s too cold to be hanging around on the streets,” he explained.

    We got to his home some time later and he showed me round the place. It was a two bedroom apartment with the two rooms upstairs and a small sitting room below.

    “Welcome home, darling,” Henry said as he put my bags in what turned out to be the spare room.

    Later, after we had eaten the meal he had prepared, we sat talking till very late at night. I gave him news about home, especially concerning his family.

    “Your dad and nearly the whole family, including my parents and some of my friends, were at the airport. It was like the whole town came to see me off,” I stated smiling slightly at the memory. We were sitting on the couch and though the heater was on, I was wrapped up in a light jacket, with stockings and slippers on my feet as I was feeling so cold.

    “And as I went to board the plane, my mum began to cry and I felt so bad, I almost ran back to hug her but that would have meant missing my flight,” I added.

    “I’m glad you are here at last,” he said, turning to cradle my face in his hands.

    “So am I. I really missed you. I’ve been dreaming about this day for years. It still feels like a dream, that any moment, I will wake up and I will be back home in Nigeria,” I said, hugging him close.

    “It’s no dream sweetheart. You are here with me now. To stay,” he noted, as he kissed me lightly.

    Then he got up and taking my hand, led me upstairs to bed.

    Henry worked as a supervisor in a care home for elderly persons- a kind of old people’s home.

    Most days, he left home very early before I had even woken up and he didn’t return till in the evening. I spent most days indoors cooking, cleaning and doing other chores. After a while I grew bored of being indoors all day and I began to venture outside. I would stroll round the neighbourhood just to get a feel of the place. The whole place was always quiet with very few people on the streets. It didn’t take me long to realise that most people kept to themselves and even neighbours living in the same building often did not know themselves, much less fraternise with one another as we do back home.

    “People here keep to themselves. It’s their nature. They are reserved,” Henry explained when I told him about my observations.

    On his days off from work, he took me to the high streets where the shops and businesses were located so I could do some shopping. With time, I learnt to move around on my own and I started to go outside my immediate neighbourhood to other parts of the city. I was happy and I had no complaints except for one thing. And it was while I was talking on the phone with my mum one day about eight months after my arrival that I began to wonder if all was well with my husband.

    “So when are we getting the good news?” my mum had asked.

    “What news, mum?” I countered in a wondering tone.

    “The baby! When am I coming over to carry my grandchild?” she asked.

    “Ha! Mum! Slow down! I just got here and I’m still trying to find my feet and you are already talking about a baby. It’s not that easy…” I said.

    “What’s the big deal about having babies? I had you when I was 21 and you are already over 30. You should not wait too long as a woman’s time is short. All I want is a grand child and the earlier you get pregnant the better…” she stated firmly.

    After she had hung up, I sat thinking over what my mum had said. It wasn’t as if I didn’t want to start a family as soon as possible. But my husband was the problem. Since I came to join him, apart from the first few weeks of my arrival, Henry hardly ever touched me. We could stay for weeks without his coming to my bed. I found it strange because while we were back home in Nigeria, he was quite passionate and he couldn’t seem to get enough of me.

    Any time I complained about his neglecting his conjugal duties to me, he would give the excuse of tiredness, stress at work and other reasons.

    “Are you sure that’s the reason? Or is it something to do with me? Have I put on weight and you no longer find me attractive?” I enquired.

    “You know that’s not true. You are still as pretty as the first day I set my eyes on you in my dad’s office. You’ve not changed at all. Just give me some time, darling. I’m due for vacation soon and I promise we shall go away to some place where I can relax and have more time for you,” he said, placing a light kiss on my cheek.

    I had no choice but to accept his explanation and I let the matter rest. Besides, I had another pressing issue that was bugging me then. By this time, I was bored, staying home all day with nothing to do but the house work and watching movies. I wanted to work but when I broached the subject to Henry, he was not too keen on the idea.

    “Don’t I provide enough for you? What do you need a job for?” he queried with a frown. I explained to him that it was not about the money, that I needed something to do to keep me busy outside the home.

    “It’s boring cooped up in here all day while you are at work. And there’s no one to even gist with as the neighbours all keep to themselves,” I grumbled. Then taking his hand, I said imploringly, “Please, honey, find something for me even if it’s part time! I just need something to do to beat boredom!”

    He thought about it for a while then said:

    “Alright, I will see what I can do though I’m not fully in support of your working,” he stated, wagging a finger at me.

    “Oh, thanks darling! I appreciate!” I said, giving him a big hug.

    “Hey, easy now! I’ve not got you the job yet!” he said laughing…

    Meeting Shelly

    Two weeks later, he found me a position at his place of work. It was a part-time job which would require my working three days a week for half a day. Henry explained that it would give me time to take care of the home unlike a full-time job that would take up too much of my time. I was quite happy with the offer and the following week, I resumed work.

    The care home was in a two story building with a large, expansive garden that looked neat and well cared for.

    That first day, I was given my duties which involved feeding, washing, cleaning up and taking care of the elderly residents assigned to me. I had never done this kind of job before but I was determined to succeed in it. And to help me with this was Shelly, an experienced co-worker, who was to oversee my work. Though born in Nigeria, Shelly grew up in the UK and had been living there ever since. She was a few years older than me and had been working at the centre since it opened.

    “I was one of the first staff employed here. So, there’s nothing I’ve not seen here,” she disclosed as she took me round the facility.

    Maybe because of their age, some of the residents were quite demanding, always requesting for one thing or the other.

    “You don’t have to give them all they want or they will soon wear you out,” she advised me one day. This was after one of my wards, an octogenarian, had demanded for some tea which I duly brought, only for him to reject it and ask for a glass of champagne! And this was a man with a heart condition who had been warned against taking alcohol!

    “At this stage, some are like children: needy, petulant and cranky as hell. As long as you give them the basic care, they will be fine,” Shelly stated briskly as we walked along the corridor.

    Working in that centre opened my eyes to a certain aspect of Western society: the way they treated their old people. Some of the residents, who had relatives hardly saw them. Some would visit once a month or so while others only at festive periods especially at Christmas. The majority had no relations at all and were being cared for by the government.

    “It’s strange. And sad too to see such old people with no children or relatives to look after them,” I told Shelly one day about three months after I started work. It was around noon and we were in the small room where some of the staff used to relax in between their duties. Shelly and I were having drinks and some snacks. Apart from a white colleague of ours, we were alone in the room.

    “That’s the way it is in this country. Once you get old, they dump you in a place like this. That’s why I don’t want to grow old here. I want to return home to Nigeria before I get to that stage of life,” she stated, taking a sip of her tea.

    “Things aren’t easy back home, you know,” I pointed out.

    “I know. But here’s no paradise either contrary to what people believe back in Nigeria. Things are tough here too especially since the recession. Okay, the infrastructure is fine and things work unlike back home, but you have to pay for everything. You pay so much tax and so many bills, at the end of the day it’s like one is just working to pay bills,” she grumbled.

    It was a common complaint among the people I had met so far. Henry too was always grumbling about the bills that kept coming regularly.

    “These people won’t kill me in this London with all these bills o!” he had said a few days earlier when I had shown him a new stack of letters that been quietly slipped in through the slit in the front door.

    The centre was run by a Nigerian lady named Milly. She was slim-built and fair-complexioned and had been living in the country for so long, she had become a citizen. Henry introduced me to her the first day I resumed work and she received me in a very cool manner. That day, I thought it was probably because of pressure of work that accounted for her attitude. But her manner towards me did not improve at subsequent interactions. In fact, I had the feeling that she positively disliked me and I wondered why as I didn’t know her before.

    “It’s like Ms Milly doesn’t like me,” I said to Shelly.

    She glanced at me quickly. “Why do you say that?” she asked.

    I shrugged.

    “It’s just a feeling I have. She barely responds to my greetings. And there was even a day she actually hissed when I greeted her at the reception. Is that the way she behaves or is it just me?” I wondered.

    “She’s not normally like that. In fact, she’s actually quite nice to the staff and residents though she could be strict at times,” she noted.

    Then seeing the confused look on my face, she added:

    “Look, don’t let it bother you. As long as you are doing your work well, there won’t be any problem. It’s just that…” she began then stopped.

    I looked curiously at her.

    “What?” I prompted, taking a big bite of my chocolate cake.

    Before speaking, she glanced round the room. The other woman had left and we were alone.

    Turning to me, she said quietly:

    “Look, Abby, I know it’s none of my business but I’ve grown to like you as a sister and I think you should know what’s been going on.”

    “What are you talking about? What is it?” I asked curiously.

    “You see, it’s like this,” she said, then drawing close to me, she began to tell me a tale that so shocked me, I could not move from my seat for a long time. It involved my husband, my boss Milly and what happened between them when he newly arrived the country…

    Continued next week.

    What did Shelly tell Abby about her husband? Don’t miss the juicy details next Saturday!

    Names have been changed to protect the narrator’s identity.

    Send comments/suggestions to 08023201831(sms only) or psaduwa@yahoo.com

  • The things on my mind

    I’m always a busy person but before those active periods of the day, I have moments of laziness when I just relax on the sofa, sip my hot chocolate and read anything of interest while listening to cool, sweet music. But the last few days have seen me getting more active than ever and I haven’t had a ‘me’ time, which is painful. The fact that the time I spend in England is not as much as the full days I spend in Nigeria means the days seem shorter here. There are so many things to do within the short period I’m here that time is always against me – it runs too fast.

    While here, I have business to do, appointments to keep, house chores to do, social visits to make and hosting to do.

    As I type this, I’m hosting some business partners and I have to send Hearts. I must confess that their discussion and argument about the football match between Chelsea and Manchester played days ago is irritating me. I can’t stop wondering why people have such heated arguments about matches when the lucky footballers don’t share their stupendous wealth with any of them. As they’re here talking about what doesn’t mean anything to me, I have so many things on my mind.

    I have to finish striking off all the items on my shopping list. I have to run errands and make final payments for a great ‘toy’ which wheels I just got for myself.

    Most importantly, I have to give a general answer to the questions people have asked about love, sex and relationship between last week and today. I treated the issue of the woman whose husband wanted a threesome last week and I started reactions with my comment that I could buy her some sex toys to make lovemaking pleasurable in her marriage.

    Well, I have bought the toys and some other useful sex aids to keep the fire burning in some bedrooms. I will very much wish that all Hearts fans have beautiful relationship and happy lives. But before we all start tearing off our partners’ clothes and dragging them to the bedroom, it would be nice to know why sex is good for us.

    Sex alone cannot hold a relationship, though. So, it’s important to know some basic things that will keep your relationship fresh. Keeping your relationship fresh also means knowing what turns your guy off he might not want to discuss with you. I have all the tips you may need on these questions here.

    I pray November brings us all the joy we have prayed for and I pray that at the end of this month, we will all meet here to celebrate the end of the year. Enjoy a sexy weekened!

  • Government should join hand in cultural promotion, says Adams

    The National Co-ordinator of the O’odua People’s Congress(OPC), Otunba Gani Adams has called on the government and corporate organisations to pay attention to culture and festivals as tools for economic development.

    Adams, promoter of the Olokun Festival foundation, stated that the benefits of cultural festivals to national development could not be quantified, and called on governments at different levels, as well as various corporate organisations in the country, to as a matter of urgency, join hands with other serious-minded Nigerians to promote same.

    Adams noted that if the Olokun Foundation as an organisation could create such a forum for economic activities to thrive, it is better imagined what could be achieved if government and other corporate organisations tap into the celebration of festivals like this across the country.

    He said the theme for the year’s celebration “Culture as a tool for economic development”, was carefully chosen to reflect the need by all and sundry to tap into the goldmine called culture, which he also said can be turned into a money spinning machine for both the individual and the country.

    The OPC leader noted that despite the challenges which at some point seemed insurmountable, God, in His infinite mercies provided the needs to host the annual event which is organised in honour of the sea goddess, Olokun.

    He called on participants to give a thought to how they can contribute in their own little ways in making the seas and oceans safer for the human race.

    While noting that culture plays a very important role in our daily lives, Adams stated that it is for this reason that our elders regard a man without culture as a dead man.

    “What this means is that culture is life. It is the way we live, eat, dress, work and even in death, our culture is reflected in the way we bury our dead,” he said.

    He, therefore, called on the Yoruba people at home and in the Diaspora to dedicate more time to teaching their children the history, culture and religion of the people.

    Adams said: “We must not lose sight of our history and the son of whom we are. It shocks me whenever I see a Yoruba child who struggles to speak Yoruba language, or greets his parents standing.”

    He lamented that a lot of ignorant people think that members of the OPC are atheists who don’t believe in the existence of God because they love and appreciate their culture.

    Nothing, he said, could be farther from the truth than this, as they must have forgotten that among its members are devout Muslims, Christians and traditional religious believers who are joined by fate and a common sense of purpose.

    Also speaking, at the event, High Chief Yussuf Akinade Olayinka I, Bashorun of Oyoland, also lamented that many Yoruba youths find it difficult to speak Yoruba, adding, that it should be a thing of pride for them to understand and speak their language fluently.

    On the benefits of the festival, Gani noted that it helps to further economic activities and provide livelihood for people close to such areas and others who troop there for trade benefits.