A charitable organisation which supports and empowers victims of domestic violence, the Glowing Future, has called for laws to change the cultural perceptions that tolerate or condone spousal abuses.
Its founder, Mary Akangbe, said there was a need to highlight the prevalence of domestic abuse, especially in Africa, where some still believe it is right for a man to hit his wife in some circumstances.
She spoke in Lagos at the launch of her memoir: Gifts – Roses and Bruises. The book documents her journey of love, betrayal, domestic abuse and violence. “I was almost killed,” she said.
Mrs Akangbe, a United Kingdom-based nurse and counselor, said the violence she suffered at home lasted for sometime before she decided “to do something about it,” which included ending the relationship.
Now, she wants to help others repair damages they may have suffered. “Spousal abuse won’t hit you at once. Before you see a scar on a woman, it must have lasted for two years because, at first, a man will not hit a woman where it will show,” she said.
Mrs Akangbe cited a World Health Organisation (WHO) report which says women are largely affected by domestic violence, with only a small proportion directed towards men. It may include emotional or outright physical abuse.
She said: “The questions we ask at Glowing Future are: To whom can women turn to when faced with violence in their relationships? What are the constraints and cultural perceptions and implications of seeking help or actually leaving an abusive partner? What services are available, and are they tailor-made?
“Part of our mission is to provide confidential and structured support for victims, survivors and their families through bi-monthly support group meetings, and to educate and empower communities to embrace a violence-free existence.
“Regardless of whom you are, what you have or have not done, everyone deserves to live a life of peace, free from fear and intimidation especially in a relationship.
“Our vision is to institute violence-free communities and empower people who are in or out of difficult relationships to live a fulfilling life beyond domestic abuse and violence.”
Akangbe said people can support Glowing Future by referring victims of domestic violence to it and encouraging them to speak up, by signing up as a volunteer to offer support, by making donations or sponsoring its counseling events.
