The Nation Newspaper

Tag: husband

  • ‘I’m tired of my husband’

    If my husband was responsible, two of our children wouldn’t have died.” These were the words of middle-aged Toun Onifade yesterday.

       She had prayed the Customary Court, Alagbado, a Lagos suburb, to dissolve her union with her husband, Monsuru Onifade.

    Describing her husband as a fetishist, she also said his irresponsible attitude led to the death of their first two children, leaving them with two – Fawaz (8) and Shuaib (6).

    “I can no longer bear with my husband’s irresponsible lifestyle. When it comes to our children, he has no clue about their upkeep. One of our children was three months old when he took ill. I told my husband but he pretended not to have heard. I sold virtually all I had to safe our son’s life because I couldn’t watch him die just like the first. My husband was not bothered. He never asked after the well-being of our child.

    “When the second one took ill, I told my mother-in-law who said she would only support me if I gave her turkey because I deal in livestock. Eventually, our son died. My mother-in-law said if I had given her the turkey, our son would have lived. I was speechless! I vowed not to allow my husband have canal knowledge of me anymore because it isn’t worth it,” Mrs Onifade said.

    She accused her husband of keeping a shrine where he worships in their home despite his claim to being a Muslim.

    Monsuru, however, told the court: “I am a responsive man. I give my children N500 for three days. Her mother rain curses on me each time I drop food stuffs. My father died a herbalist; the shrine is all I inherited from him.”

    The court’s President, Mr Olabode Sekoni, fixed a date for chamber interview and ordered them to bring two relations each. He adjourned the case till September 2.

  • Free my husband, woman begs kidnappers

    mrs. Grace Magic-Kingdom, whose husband, Otuke, was abducted by gunmen in Bayelsa State on August 16, is begging his captors to release him.

    Otuke is one of the four Setraco workers, who were abducted at a project site and taken away on a speed boat.

    The others are Caleb Agein, Gabriel Oghene and Godwill Udodong.

    Speaking to reporters in Benin City, Mrs Magic-Kingdom said her husband was receiving malaria treatment when he was abducted.

    She said life had been miserable for her family since his abduction, adding that they need to pay house rent and buy food.

    The victim’s elder brother, Oke, said the kidnappers were demanding N50 million ransom.

    Wondering where the kidnappers expected them to get the money, he said Otuke’s salary is less than N90,000 monthly.

    Oke urged the kidnappers to release the victims.

  • Husband seeks end to 23-year-old marriage

    AN Ado-Ekiti resident, Mr. Sola Olanipekun (41), has urged a customary court in the Ekiti State capital to end the marriage of 23 years with his wife, Anike.

    Olanipekun, a carpenter living at Adeun in the state capital, said he had been separated from his wife for about two years and was not ready to resettle with her. He noted that they were not properly married, but came together on what he called “free association.”

    The husband said: “The association has produced one male and two female children, with the eldest child being 23 and the last being 10.”

    Olanipekun accused his wife of “unruly attitude, desertion, deceit, adultery and incessant fighting.”

    He added that he caught his wife having amorous discussions on phone with one of his men friends.

    His wife, he said, cared little for the children, but “preferred to send money to her concubines.”

    Olanipekun told the court that his wife had once ordered her siblings to beat him up.

    The husband explained that he had endured the marriage for so long based on the advice of some elderly relations.

    He pleaded for the custody of their three children, namely Oladele (Male, 23), Olanrewaju (female, 16) and Olamide (female, 10).

    He said he had the means to care for the children sufficiently and would not remarry to any other woman.

    Anike, in her written response to the petitioners’ claims, said her husband lied regarding his claims about their marriage.

    She said the husband was seeking the dissolution “to solely own the house” currently being occupied by him, “but which they both contributed money to build.”

    She explained that her husband had locked her outside their house on minor disagreements on several occasions.

    Anike added that the husband had not been caring for the children or paying their school fees, urging the court to dismiss her husband’s petition.

    She urged the court to dissolve the marriage since it “had already broken down irretrievably.”

    She said the house being occupied by the petitioner should be sold by the court’s Sheriff and proceeds be shared equally between the two.

    The wife asked the court to grant her custody of the last child.

    The court’s president, Ogunseemi J.A., a lawyer, adjourned further hearing till September 9, ordering both the petitioner and the respondent to bring their witnesses.

  • ‘I sleep with knife because of my husband’

    •I caught her with another man, claims husband

    Suliat Onakoya broke down in tears before the Customary Court, Agege, the popular Lagos suburb, as she sought the dissolution of her marriage to Waheed Onakoya for being “violent and uncaring.”

    “This is the second year he left home and I have been responsible for our rent. Each time he comes home, he would always threaten to beat me to death if I don’t leave his house. He told the landlord to eject me, but he couldn’t because I don’t owe him. I sleep with a knife because I am afraid he may attack me at night. I was hinted by my co-tenants that he beat his previous wife to a coma. He beats me over trivial issues. I don’t love him anymore; I want a dissolution,” she pleaded.

    Onakoya, who debunked the allegation, said: “I work in a neighbouring state; I only come home at weekends. Painfully, I once caught my wife with another man in our room. She enjoys listening to gossips. However, I love her and still want to be part of her.”

    The court president, Mr Philip Williams, advised the parties to maintain peace and urged Suliat to stop sleeping with a knife. He fixed a mediation session for the couple and ordered them to bring two relations each.

    He adjourned the case till September 11.

  • ‘How I withstood my husband’s scorn to start my waste buiness

    ‘How I withstood my husband’s scorn to start my waste buiness

    Unemployment and lack of resources to carry out a legitimate business has become a problem for many. Interestingly, there are some opportunities around that require little or no capital to start. Yetunde Oladeinde finds out one of such is making money out of wastes. Recycling has so many potential like its adoption of recycling as a veritable option to landfill or serve for the production of tissue paper, paper, can, glass and plastic waste.

    Matilda Taiwo is a successful waste recycler and the CEO of Goodware Stitches. She graduated from the Yaba College of Technology, Lagos where she studied Business Administration and in 2011 she was one of the beneficiaries of the Pan African University and federal government initiative for entrepreneurs taking their businesses to the next level.

    “I worked in the Personnel Department of Flour Mills for about two years and moved on to work with Berger Paints as a Sales Coordinator for about 14 years. It was a very interesting experience and I learnt a lot about building a brand, marketing and more.”

    She resigned to go into private business in 1993, first as an event decorator, and she has done this for about 20 years now. “The business is still on and I find it exciting transforming the venue for parties and creating something different from others. Event planning and décor was good because I had a passion for it to a fault. It was quite lucrative and I got the support needed from my staff. To succeed, you have to be very creative and I love bringing new ideas into whatever I am doing.”

    Asked how she got into manufacturing and she replied this way: “I loved manufacturing from the outset and this gave birth to Goodware Stitches Ltd. In 2007, I started research work on how to go into the recycling line of business. At the beginning, we were gathering wastes for others. We also bought from scavengers who are now known as Source Managers. At a point, we started supplying our raw materials to some Chinese people who needed it for some products.”

    Taiwo continued: “Then one day, while we were in a factory, a Chinese client told me that inside your gutter, on your streets, you have a lot of money but you people cannot see it. He then said he could see potential in me as a recycler. He said I had the zeal and everything it took to be a waste recycler. That was the turning point for me. When I got home that day, I sat down for about four hours meditating on the words and I realised that the guy was right. So, that was how it started in 2007.”

    How was it like at the beginning? “It was very challenging. First, it was a tug of war between me and my husband. He wondered why I should go into something that was demeaning and turn the house to waste. I pleaded with him and started the business from the house. We later rented a mini factory somewhere on Ogundipe Street in Shasha, Lagos. It was a small place and we got bigger and better.” Four years later, the expansion gradually took her to Ikorodu Industrial Development Centre where they built the factory.

    How would she compare the changes that have taken place since she started and now? “I had to build the factory with personal funds, bought the generator, machines and started the recycling business. It was tough at the beginning but things are getting better. We thank God for where we are today, even though we are not yet where we want to be. Apart from manufacturing waste bags and poly products, we have also been able to develop between 100 and 200 products that we can recycle. It is a capital-intensive project and we need reliable investors to come in as partners and the support of banks that are SME-friendly.”

    Her dream is to see Nigeria setting a pace in future as an industrialised nation, “a place where every household would be producing finished products made from waste recycling.” Talking about banks and the role they play when it comes to accessing credit for SMEs, Taiwo said: “I would say that it is difficult to access loans because banks just concentrate on giving out loans. That should not be the only thing, they can also be part of the business too. When they disburse the money, they should also be there to monitor the process.”

    Taiwo stated that government needs to give more attention and support to SMEs in the country. “To an extent, we are yet to feel the impact because the money is being given to the wrong people. It is not going to those who really need the money. In the sector, there are so many opportunities to create wealth and employment for young people.”

    What is the secret of her success? you ask. “It is the passion. I am happy when people comment about my product. I get inspired. This year, we were in Gambia and last year we were in Togo, and the trips were sponsored by the first lady of Ogun State and Nigerian Export Promotion Council to showcase products produced in Nigeria by Nigerians. There we met people who loved our products and we got an MOU from them.”

    She declared that “rural women are involved in the collection of waste and it is a way of empowering them. In Nigeria, the owner of the business must be on ground to monitor things because of the attitude of the personnel.”

  • Cecilia Akpan: My husband is God-sent

    Cecilia Akpan: My husband is God-sent

    Nigeria table tennis star, Cecilia Otu Akpan opens up like she has never done to MORAKINYO ABODUNRIN on those intimate things: hubby, son, and other passions aside table tennis.       

    SOME marriages were indeed made in heaven and tellingly, that of Mr. and Mrs. Ime Edet Akpan has some divine backing following the dramatic manner they came together.

    Mrs. Edet Akpan for a start was before known as Miss. Cecilia Offiong Otu – one of the poster girls of the ping-pong game (table tennis) in Nigeria with a career spanning over a decade.

    Cecilia in a landmark interview with The Nation Sport & Style admitted that she was blessed by God for the timely meeting of her husband and proves that being a sports woman is not a barrier to marriage.

    “I actually got married at about 24 years of age in 2009,” Cecilia volunteered in the presence of her dotting four-year-old son, Edidiong.  “We’ve never had any problem  since we got married because we have mutual respect for one another; he’s so caring, kind and above all, God fearing, ” she noted  while opening up on how fate dragged her to the man of her dream.

    She revealed: “There is no doubt that I got my kind of man in my husband; Mr. Ime Edet Akpan. He’s such a wonderful person. He’s a God fearing person and right from the day we met such a person that has no privacy with me. I’m so happy to be his wife because he’s God-sent.

    “His life is an open book to me and there is genuine love between us. He is a deeply religious person and he’s always putting God in the forefront of whatever he wants to do.  Actually, he didn’t set out to have a relationship with me and that he was interested that I dedicate my life to God; and make sure I go to church.

    “Frankly, I didn’t have  a permanent church I was going until I met him because it is not everywhere one can call the house of God because  we have heard stories of some places using diabolical means. It was at that point that I needed to get closer to God and he really encouraged me to be closer to God. He helped me to throw my burden unto God and somehow along the line, we became close.

    “He was more or less the janitor in the church, but along the line, he got a job at the NNLG in Uyo. He went off shore for the first time for about six months; and I thought he was playing when he told me we were going to get married immediately he came back.

    “About two months after, he called me one day asking me to tell my parents to get ready for our marriage and to cut a long story short, that was how we got married. I’m so happy to marry him because he has not changed ever since we got married and even when he’s comfortable now,” Cecilia said with some candour, among sundry details about her life. Excerpts…

    The Beginning

    I actually started playing table tennis when I was in primary school under the influence of our present coach in Rivers State, Richard George Edem. Actually, we had a table tennis board in our compound then and I had the habit of joining others to play after coming back from school and it was there coach Edem noticed me. It was at his instance and pressure that I featured at a local tournament hosted at the African Club within the south-south zone. He more or less forced me to take part in the competition because I didn’t think I was good enough but he encouraged me after seeing the entry and the standard saying  I have the quality to beat the rest judging from what he had observed and there was opportunity for me to make money by playing table tennis. My late sister also encouraged me and told me that there was nothing to lose for me since I was not paying anything to feature in the competition. By the grace of God, I won bronze in that competition and that was how my journey into table tennis began. I used the little amount of money I won in that competition to buy my wears because I actually wore gown to feature in the competition. The prize money was eight hundred naira(N800) which was a decent amount of money then to me in 1997 and that really encouraged me to play the game because making as much just in a three-day competition just within Calabar was huge to me. The coach kept reminding us that if we were on top of our game, we would be rich and famous by travelling to so many places while representing the country.

    Challenges

    It was not easy at all because I started playing while in school and it was a big challenge to me then because I would have to go for training on a daily basis. At some point, there were changes about when we go to school as we were doing morning and afternoon shifts; and this actually affected my training programme. But by the grace of God, I was able to complete my secondary school because it wasn’t easy. I also had to battle with the challenge of having good equipment to play with, but to the glory of God, I still did well irrespective of the kind of racquet (bat) I was using much to the surprise of many people. I remember playing at a tournament in Abeokuta; one guy commended my ability to beat everybody despite the fact that I used an inferior racket. It was God that made all of this possible and I really have reasons to thank God for where I’m today.

    Pre-match rituals

    Prayer is my key before playing any match or any competition. Even when I’m sure of beating my opponent, I don’t forsake praying and I can pray anywhere. Sometimes, I would go into the toilet or any quiet place to pray before playing in order to commit the match into the hands of God. Thereafter, I would do some light exercise in order to keep myself warm. I don’t underrate anybody even if the person is not older than my son.

    Best moments

    My best moments are usually when I have money and that does not mean that I’m crazy about money. I’m the type that loves to give and assist others, as such I always like to have money on me to assist others who are in need. I like to make people around me happy, but how would they be happy if I don’t have money? I don’t have a charity organisation yet, but I do as much as I can to help others. I give as much as circumstance demands; whatever I can give, I do. I derive joy in giving and I’m guided with the principle that a giver never lacks. Sometimes when I run into cash problem, people give to me even without asking and that is just God’s favour.

    Growing up

    It was fun growing up because I started earning money playing table tennis since I was young. Again, I was always in the national camp because we were having a lot of competitions then. We were always in camp preparing for All Africa Games, Commonwealth, Olympics and so many others, so I grew up in the game, as such it was fun for me. We had the opportunity of going on training tours outside the country for several competitions and for several months I was always not around. Before you know it, I have already grown up and I eventually got married in 2001.

    Marriage

    I used to hear that it is difficult for athletes, especially sports women to get married. But it sounds funny because that is a wrong perception since being an athlete is not a deformity. There is this erroneous belief that athletes are morally loose because they spend so much time in camp.

    Of course, we have heard cases of some athletes sleeping with their coaches in order for them to be picked and I think it is the same thing with a secretary sleeping with her boss in order to gain some undue advantage over other workers. So it has to do with the individuals that are involved. It doesn’t make anybody a good girl for that matter and that sort of thing never happened to me.  I was so good and on top of my game to the extent that there was no way anybody could drop me from the team because I didn’t have a relationship with him. I can go to any length to ensure that the right thing is done and I never condoned such with anybody; nobody has done that to me and it is therefore wrong for anybody to have the impression that it is difficult for sports people to get married.  Immorality has nothing to do with sports; it is either you are a good girl or you are not.

    Valuable possession

    First and foremost, my family is my greatest possession but if you are talking about what I have been able to do with what I have earned playing table tennis, I have reasons to thank God. I have properties here and there; as well as landed properties. Much of what I have been able to acquire today was through the help of God and my husband because initially, I was just getting and spending the money. But since I met my husband, I have been able to do so much and today, I have rented apartments.

    Advice to fans and upcoming athletes

    Whether you are Christian or Muslim, my advice is that we must all ensure that we live a good life. We should also embrace God so that we can all live with the fear of God.  I have lived a decent life in spite of the fact that I’m a sportswoman. I’m proud to say that even when I was single, no one can say that I had a relationship with him and if there’s anyone, let him step out.  I’ll advise that my fans should live a good life so that God can bless them.

     Scotland Commonwealth Games

    By the grace of God, I would be part of the team to the Commonwealth Games in Scotland and I’m really looking forward to it with great optimism. I have been training hard, but there is nothing much we would have been able to achieve without the blessings of God. I’m praying and working hard to ensure that I come back from the Commonwealth Games with a medal. All things are possible by the grace of God.

    My other passion and rivals

    I think another sport I would have done if not table tennis is squash. I’m very good at it; I play it once in a while and I do play with some of our players. I think if I put as much commitment to squash as I do to table tennis, the sky would have been my limit.

    Really, I don’t fear anybody even on the African table tennis circuit. Fear can rob anybody of success, as such I don’t give in to fear but I respect anybody I’m playing against. Among my contemporaries, I respect Offiong Edem because she’s my closest rival; I believe she is capable of winning if she is in best form when she faces anybody and the same thing is applicable to her when playing against me. We have much respect for her.

    My favourite places

    Outside Nigeria, you know the standard we get in many countries is almost the same because we are put under good care and training in good facilities, But I like China because it is a clean city. It is an organised place despite their huge population. I love the skyscrapers in China; and I love the fact that their old people are still very agile by participating in sports.

    Bu I love Calabar because it is a peaceful city and that is why it is convenient for our state to host many sporting activities.  I’m fine and happy always because it’s my town. I love it here and I want to use this opportunity to invite my friends to come and visit Calabar.

  • ‘My husband has ruined me’

    A 37-year-old thrift collector and credit business woman is seeking divorce with her “drunkard” husband, Edwin Mba, before the Customary Court at Alakuko, a Lagos suburb.

    The woman, Helen Mba, told the court that she had traded off her collections as loans to her husband who, she claimed, is now “heavily indebted” to the detriment of her customers who are now on her neck for their money.

    She said her 10-year marriage to her man which produced three children, had got entangled in troubles, adding that she wanted an end to it.

    “I have been in this business for over eight years and it has been my source of living. I could not stand seeing my jobless husband suffer. So, I lent him some money I collected from customers in the belief that it would be returned at the end of the year. My husband went into second-hand clothing business where I often collect thrift. At the end of the year, my husband could not refund it as promised. He gave flimsy excuses.

    “As a wife who wanted her husband’s success, I continually gave him. Now, I am at a loss, I cannot afford to pay my customers. The education of my children has stopped. We now eat from hand to mouth. I can’t walk freely because I owe people; I am now a wanted person. It is unfortunate that my husband has ruined my life.”

    She told the court that Edwin had never contributed to the upbringing of their children.

    Obviously babbling, Edwin said: “My wife has been a pain in my neck. We built the house we live in. I only take two bottles of alcoholic drink daily.”

    The Court President, Chief Godwin Awosola, advised Edwin to stop going to Helen’s house. He adjourned the matter till July 31.

  • Home business is good business

    Home business is good business

    Coping with work and family can be stressful. It takes proper planning, having a focus and an understanding spouse to survive, writes Yetunde Oladeinde.

    WANTED husband! Is there a criterion required? Yes, he must have the Wisdom of Solomon, the patience of Job and the courage of David. That’s the advertisement most women would run if they wanted to find the ideal husband. After having the experience for about a year or two, it also helps if the man has Jonah’s ability to come up smiling no matter what.

    There is certainly no business like home business. Washing, cooking, pounding, cleaning, trading, fetching water, supporting the husband, taking care of the children and office are some of the departments every wife takes care of on a daily basis.

    Housework, for many, is serious business. It actually takes the woman round the clock. That probably explains why some feminists argue that they should be paid. If you do not believe this, then let’s take a trip to a typical day in a woman’s life.

    Kunmbi stretches on her bed. She is still feeling sleeping but has just been woken by the alarm clock placed directly above her head. Time is about 6 am. For the mother of five, this is when a typical day begins except on Sundays when she has the luxury of an extra hour.

    Tired but determined, the forty-two-year-old woman gets up slowly from the bed so as not to awaken her husband, Gbolahan, who is still snoring. “Most times I guess he did not hear the alarm ring or he probably did not hear the alarm go off. Even if he did, it was none of his business as it was not yet time for him to wake up,” she says.

    As a dedicated wife, alive to her duties, she has to prepare the breakfast for her family before going to work. “There are days when I turn the water faucet and I would discover that there is no water. At such moments I would have to rush downstairs to fetch some buckets for the kitchen and the bathroom.”

    Apart from handling daily chores, it is also important for women to monitor the growth and development of their children, especially the girl child. “It is sad that a number of mothers abandon this duty to nannies and house helps. The result is that the children are exposed to wrong hands who exploit such lapses,” says Maltida Ibekwe, a social worker.

    Ibekwe adds: “Some of us are lucky because we are married to men who are caring and understanding. This makes it easy but if you are unlucky to live with a difficult spouse, it would be difficult to make both work together simultaneously. In this kind of situation, the woman would have to choose one and she would not be happy in the process.”

    She goes on to talk about some of the things young people are exposed to at puberty and the need for mothers to be watchful at this stage.

    “It is a stage when the young ones want to be adventurous. It is therefore normal to feel curious, anxious and ashamed especially if you are the only girl in the house. I also have a case of someone who was happy because she was going to wear a bra. Others are ashamed and they wear double vest to cover the bump. Some of the changes include menstruation, pubic hair, pimples, growing by the hips, nipples and other internal organs. Mood swings also occur and the sex hormones are responsible for sexually maturity.”

    On her part, Folashade Ajayi talks about the different ways in which the predator can abuse the girl-child. “Here, the young ones need information to guide them from irresponsible people who would want to take advantage of them. The important thing is that every child has a right to know about sex education. The body is divided into two parts (private and public).”

    Ajayi adds that “Everyone can have access to the public part but the private parts, as the word implies, are those extrinsic parts and they should not be touched. It is important to raise an alarm or say you just brushed me now. Is it a mistake? Most times, it isn’t. Sexual abuse comes in different ways.”

    She goes on to use a personal example to buttress her point. “Imagine a designer wants to take your measurement with the tape rule and it comes across the nipple. Another example is that sometimes, the person can come and show you sexual scenes from a magazine. I had a similar experience when I was in school. For about a week the guy kept telling us about a special book that he was going to bring. He finally brought it on a Friday and he gathered only the girls, five of us. When he opened it, we saw naked bodies and we were all screaming and ran away. Much later he came back and I threatened to report him. Before I knew it, he was already sleeping with those girls.”

    In spite of the many odds, women are happy each time to reflect on the memorable moments no matter how small or insignificant it is. “I would say that the happy moments count for a lot of women and that is why they prefer to work hard and dwell on this. A woman is also eager to deprive herself of so many things just to change the life of the family positively,” says 52-year-old Ndidi Maxwell who has been married for about thirty years.

    To have a wonderful experience at the home front, communication is also very vital. “When I got married about eight years ago, the first few months were a nightmare. We fought almost every day and I had a number of scars that made me think of opting out. Unlike the days when we were courting, things were different and we were parallel lines. After a while I realised that what was missing was communication and once we made use of this everything changed positively,” Maxwell reminisces.

  • Why my husband can’t cheat on me–Nollywood actress Angela Okorie

    Why my husband can’t cheat on me–Nollywood actress Angela Okorie

    Angela Okorie, one of the popular faces in Nollywood, comes across as unassuming. She is, however, a gifted actress whose ability to interpret any given role has been variously acknowledged by her fans.The former Delta Soap model, who hails from Ebonyi State, opens up to DUPE AYINLA- OLASUNKANMI on her career, marriage and pains, among other issues.

    WHAT are you currently working on? I’m currently on a location, shooting a movie with some notable faces in the industry, including Frederick Leonard. As an actress, I look at what I can pass across in any given role. This new work is a beautiful story that is definitely going to stand out because it’s loaded with lots of moral lessons. The movie also re-emphasizes that there is nothing God cannot do. It teaches Nigerians to hold on to God, no matter how terrible their situations may be.

    Over the years, you’ve gradually wormed your way into the hearts of many movie buffs. But how did life as an actor start?

    I did my first movie, Sincerity, in December 2009. And since then, I have been very busy with movie jobs.

    You are one of the few actresses who are currently in high demand. So, what is the secret?

    The only secret is that the producers fancy me a lot. There is one thing about marketers and producers: if your face is not selling their movies, nothing will make them put you on their posters or movie jackets. Basically, my face is on the movie jackets and posters because I merit it.

    Will you say it is only your beautiful face that they are after and not something else?

    Our fans make us. If, for instance, movie lovers keep asking about my movie, that means they love and appreciate my acting. It’s not just because of the beauty of my face. So, in that regard, I think my face sells movies.

    How many movies have you done over the years?

    I’ve done close to 80 now.

    Which of those movies brought you to the limelight?

    That was Holy Serpent, where I played the role of a village girl who was married to Kenneth Okonkwo. It was produced in 2011.

    How did you get your first movie role?

    I think the producer was looking for a beautiful girl. Coincidentally, I went to that location set with a friend who was part of the production. Along the line, the producer saw me and felt I matched the character they had been looking for. Before then, I was basically into modelling. I didn’t even want to accept the offer. But I was persuaded, so I decided to try it.

    What basically was the producer looking for?

    He was looking for a very beautiful girl, who is tall and curvy and he found that in me. In fact, it was at that location that I was auditioned. I wasn’t tensed in anyway because I was already a star in my own world.

    What has been your unique selling point over the years?

    I think it has been the grace of God. On the other hand, I think I have what producers want, which is my talent. So, this is why I keep receiving calls for movie jobs. It wouldn’t have been so, if I don’t have the talent, charisma and voice.

    In order words, your beauty has been your selling point?

    You can say so!

    Do you still model?

    Yes, I’m still into modeling, but I’m done with Delta Soap. I stayed with them for about seven years. Now, I have decided to concentrate more on acting because it is working out for me.

    That means you earn more now as an actress than a model?

    Yes.

    You’ve been in the limelight for long; so, why have you not been appointed the face of any brand?

    I don’t think anything is delaying it. Maybe the companies have not been able to reach me or they are still looking for my contacts. Most of the companies that I have tried to work with didn’t come with good money, so I rejected them. A telecommunication company has approached me, but the money was not good enough.

    What has changed about you ever since you got married?

    Nothing really has changed. I’m still who I used to be, since I got married three years ago.

    What attracted you to your husband?

    I dated him for two years and I discovered he is a good and God-fearing man. Besides, I found out that he is equal to the task. Lots of men are scared of getting married to actresses, especially the pretty ones. But my husband has that courage. He knows everything about me.

    How does he cope knowing you are always in the midst of men?

    He knows what the entertainment industry is all about. I don’t even have many friends in the industry because there is so much backbiting. That is why I choose my friends.

    What has life taught you over the years?

    Life has taught me how to be calm. I have also learnt that humility is very important in life. Again, life has taught me that one must always tolerate the others.

    Who is the real you?

    I’m different from what I act. The real me is a good person with a good heart. I also don’t like people taking advantage of me. I’m a very temperamental person; I hate intimidation. I like to see people happy. My mission on earth is to make people happy.

    Do you have any bad habit that you are probably trying to kick?

    I don’t think there is anything I’m doing that is not good. Nobody is putting a gun on me to do them; so, I do what I think is right.

    What do you do when you are not working?

    I like traveling. Most times, when I’m not working, I travel out to ‘chill’ for a week or thereabouts.

    What do you relax with: cigarette or alcohol?

    I’m not a smoker, but I only do that in movies, when there is need for such. I live my normal life when I’m not acting.

    Can you recall the craziest thing a fan has ever done to you?

    When I was coming out from a shopping mall on the street of New York, a fan kissed me and said, ‘What will you do? I’m so crazy about you.’ And in that situation, I couldn’t do anything because my fans made me and I just have to show them love.

    Most female celebrities seem to have a prize when it comes to going into relationship with the opposite sex. How will you react to this?

    I’m married and I respect that fact. My marriage comes first in everything I do. So, no amount of money can lure me into bed with another man.

    Do your fellow women also woo you?

    Sorry; I’m not into that. I’m not into lesbianism.

    You’ve never done it before?

    No, I don’t even know what it looks like. What does it look like (general laughs)?

    Do you see anything wrong in it?

    Our culture forbids it. It is a sin and it is uncalled for. Why would a woman be romantically involved with another woman?

    Does that mean no woman has approached you before?

    Of course, lots of them have approached me, but I get irritated by that.

    How do you handle it?

    I just smile and walk away.

    How do you keep your man away from other ladies?

    He is a man, so he can do what pleases him. I am not the type of woman that tries to monitor a man. No matter how you monitor a man, if he wants to cheat, he will.

    A lot of women have had to move out of their homes because their husbands have been found to be having affairs outside. Can you do that?

    (Laughs) In the first place, it will take a lot before my husband can go for another woman. That can only happen when I don’t satisfy him in everything.

    Could you explain better?

    Everything! It’s only when a woman does not satisfy his man in everything that he goes out in search of other women.

    But men are said to be polygamous in nature?

    I’ve never caught my husband with another woman; so, I don’t believe that.

    Maybe he has been carefully cheating on you?

    I don’t think so. I got married to a good man.

    Does that stop him from developing feelings for another woman?

    You are not him, so you don’t know him. I have never thought of him doing that. If it is happening, I don’t know. All I know is that he is a good man.

    Are there things that make you cry?

    Yes, I cry over the loss of my first child. It was actually a miscarriage. I was six to seven months pregnant when it happened. I felt really bad. That has been my secret pain.

    How many more kids are you expecting?

    I have only one now. I don’t know how many more I will have.

    Could you tell me more about your background?

    I hail from Ebonyi State, but I was born and brought up in Cotonou. I’m the third in a family of five. I was singing in the church before I came to Nigeria to begin my modelling career. I studied Public Administration at the Lagos State University, Ojo. At the moment, I’m studying Theatre Art at the University of Lagos, Akoka. I’m doing this because I need to learn more.

    I know you have some tattoos…

    (Cuts in) A newspaper misquoted me in the past, saying I wanted to go for more tattoos. I did the tattoos over eight years ago. Now, I would rather take them out than go for more. There are some epic movie roles that I would spend lots of money trying to cover up the tattoos because some of the makeup artistes might not provide concealer.

  • How to make your husband happy

    1. Be romantic. Romance can easily become a back-burner priority after years of marriage. Make sure to save time for romantic activities like candle-lit dinners, go to the cinemas together or cuddling up to watch a movie at home.

    2. Spice up your sex life. One of the main aspects of marriage where the excitement can quickly fade is the sexual aspect. You’ll both have to work hard to keep your sex life interesting, but thankfully there are several things that you can do.

    Don’t get stuck in a boring routine. If you and your hubby are used to having sex without any foreplay or wooing beforehand, sex can become just another activity that happens when you get in bed. Take the time to woo each other at spontaneous times to avoid feeling like you have allotted time for being intimate. Scheduled sex is not sexy.

    Listen to your hubby’s wants and needs. Know what your hubby’s preferences are and what he wants to try in the bedroom. His desires may change over time. Just ask him what he likes and wants, this question in itself can be a turn on!

    3. Set a date night. Between you and your hubby’s busy schedules, it can be very hard to find time to spend with each other. Make a commitment to go on a date or make a home-cooked meal together at least once per week. Here are some date night ideas:

    Go to dinner and a movie. This classic never gets old if you switch up the restaurant and the movie genre each week.

    Make dinner together. Try making a dish that requires more effort than one you would make on a random week night. Make vegetable soup for instance from scratch to have fun while cooking.

    4. Send flirty text messages throughout the day. Sometimes nothing is better than a spontaneous text or voice message from your lover. Call just to say “I love you” or send your hubby a flirty message that contains something for him to look forward to.

    Send sexy snap chats to your hubby to remind him what’s waiting for him after work. Make sure to warn him that you sent a sexy snap in advance so that he doesn’t open it in front of his friends, or worse, his colleagues.

    5. Get some new sexy outfits. If you’re constantly wallowing around the house in baggy clothes. It might be time to take a trip to the shops for some new clothes. There’s nothing wrong with being comfortable in front of your hubby, but be sure not to lose track of taking care of yourself as a result. Spice up a plain outfit with a sexy blouse or dress. Put of a pair of stilettos to elongate your legs. Every man loves long, sexy legs. A pair of heels are a quick and easy way to make any outfit look sexier. Get some new lingerie. Lingerie is a sexy way to spice up your bedroom life and make your hubby see you in a new light.

    6. Have an attractive attitude. Being attractive isn’t all about looking sexy, it’s about exuding a compassionate attitude as well. Be sure to retain a kind disposition toward your husband and be considerate of his feelings.

    Exude happiness. As humans, we’re all going to have good days and bad days. While you shouldn’t try to mask your feelings if you are feeling sad or depressed, you should try to be a pleasant person to be around whenever possible. Smile. Visual signals are just as important as words. Avoid walking around with a scowl on your face all day and try to smile as much as possible.

    7. Exercise. This might sound like a plea to get you to work out for the sake of a sexy body, but exercise can provide you with so much more than a slim frame and ripped abs. When you exercise, your body releases endorphins, neurotransmitters that reduce stress and induce happiness. Maintaining a steady exercise routine has also been shown to increase sexual desire as a result of the positive effects working out has on your body and mind. Try energy-inducing exercises like running. Don’t overlook the positive effect that simply feeling sexy can have one your love life. When you feel desirable, your confidence and sexuality shine through.