Category: Weekend Treat

  • Ahmed  Dasuki lives  it up in Ghana

    Ahmed Dasuki lives it up in Ghana

    A mention of the ex-Sultan of Sokoto, Alhaji Ibrahim Dasuki’s name evokes eminence, royalty and wealth. Even with the Sani Abacha’s deposition of the former Sultan, the family still looms large in the socio-cultural affairs of the country.

    Like every well built dynasty, the Dasuki family has produced prominent people in the nation’s economic and political hubs. One of them is Mallam Ahmed Dasuki, younger brother of President Goodluck Jonathan’s National Security Adviser, Alhaji Sambo Dasuki. In spite of his enormous wealth, you don’t immediately perceive an air of opulence the first time you run into him. Yet the stylish prince is a very big player in the corporate world in Nigeria and even beyond the country’s shores.

    He is the Chairman of Fifth Chukker Polo & Country Club in Kaduna. And in Accra, Ghana where he is based, he is reputed for his connections in the high places. He is not only famous and well respected as a successful businessman, he is also seen as one of the Nigerians who have contributed to the growth and development of the country.

    A philanthropist, Mallam Dasuki has business interests in the various sectors of the economies of Nigeria and Ghana. He is a director in Stanbic IBTC, MTN Nigeria and many other companies.

  • Chris  Ogiemwonyi  set to give  daughter out  in marriage

    Chris Ogiemwonyi set to give daughter out in marriage

    Notwithstanding the groundswell of controversies surrounding the Minister of Aviation, Stella Oduah, her estranged husband, Dr. Chris Ogiemwonyi, is glowing with bliss at the moment. Not even the N255m bulletproof car scandal that rocks Stella’s life at the moment would distract Dr. Ogiemwonyi from his fatherly aspirations.

    Not that he is happy about what Stella is going through at the moment. The former NNPC executive and ex-Minister of State for Works is giving out his fourth child, Omosefe Christine, in marriage. Omosefe will be walking down the aisle with Peter Olurotimi, son of a professor of Community Health, Oladapo Hunponu-Wusu.

    The traditional wedding ceremony, a family source said, is billed to hold in Abuja in December while the white wedding will hold in Febuary 2014.

    Ogiemwonyi is very happy at the moment as he seems to have put behind him the intrigues and betrayal that saw him out of the corridors of power three years ago when he was dropped from President Goodluck Jonathan’s cabinet while his estranged wife, Stella, found favour with Mr. President.

  • Prince Tonye Princewill at a crossroads

    Prince Tonye Princewill at a crossroads

    The talk in town at the moment is the decision of Rivers political bigwig, Prince Tonye Princewill, to declare support for President Goodluck Jonathan and his hesitation in quitting the PDP even after Governor Rotimi Amaechi had bid farewell to the ruling party.

    It will be recalled that in 2007, he ran for governorship on the platform of the now defunct Action Congress. In the build-up to the 2011 governorship election in Rivers State, he had deployed his political machinery, Princewill Political Associates, to campaign for Governor Amaechi’s re-election.

    But political observers believe that he is currently in a quandary as to the political path he would follow, considering that the Presidency may throw its weight behind Nyeson Wike in the 2015 governorship election.

  • We’re together for just three months now…

    Good evening ma. I’m a regular reader of your column and I have a little problem to share with you and I need your help on it. It goes like this: There’s this guy I’ve been in love with for three months now, but we’ve quarreled for more than 10 times as if we have dated for a year. All these quarrels are not over important things; ordinary jokes sometimes lead to quarrels and he will keep off for days. I don’t know if this is because we are not staying close to each other he is in Lagos while I’m in Akwa Ibom State. Please tell me what to do. Love you.My dear girl, whether you live together or apart, once two people talk all the time, they are bound to have issues once in a while or always. In your own case, you’re just getting to know each other and coming from different backgrounds, you may say things the other person may not be used to, that would hurt or annoy them. I know a couple who were quarreling all the time because one person was always correcting the other about pronunciations and grammatical structures when the person being corrected thought he knew everything already and that nobody ever corrected him in the past. It took a while before he realized that his partner meant well. For your sake, I’m publishing the piece of writing below: A Series Of Misunderstandings

    Written by David Wygant

    A relationship involves two people getting together, falling in love, having wonderful times, having amazing sex and having a great friendship. A relationship is really just a series of misunderstandings. Think about it. You’re in a relationship. You’re getting along great. Everything is perfect. Then, all of a sudden, you have a misunderstanding. What happens when you have that misunderstanding? Both people will usually go into defense mode. Defense mode is so much fun, it really is. One person hurts the other person. Instead of apologizing, the person will say “The reason why I hurt you was . . . ” and they will give a list. They will say things like, “It’s just because of the way you talked to me. So then I said that back to you.” It seems like nobody can really just look at each other and say, “I’m sorry.” So many people have trouble saying those two words. Why is it so hard to say ‘I’m sorry?’ If you hurt someone, don’t go into defense mode and let yourself justify needing to get your reasons across. Why not just apologize once in a while? If you would do this, then maybe you’d have fewer misunderstandings. A relationship is really a series of misunderstandings until you finally give in and understand one another. So many things in a relationship can go wrong. The problem is that during these misunderstandings, it is hard to let go of that for which you are fighting. It’s hard to let go of a lot of things. The thing about a relationship is that you need to let go and try to understand the other person better. If that person asks you for the same things over and over again and yet you don’t do it, obviously you’re not doing something they would like you to be doing. Instead of just doing that thing, however, people will cause a misunderstanding by getting defensive and saying something like “I do all these other things for you, so why aren’t you satisfied?” That person probably is satisfied. They just want or need more of something. Part of a relationship with someone is to give the other person unconditionally the things that they need in addition to the things you want to do for them. Relationships would have far fewer misunderstandings if people would get out of defense mode, dropped the ego and really looked at each other as being on the same team. Otherwise, a relationship will just continue to be a series of misunderstandings.

  • I went into MENOPAUSE with the shock of my husband’s death in  plane crash

    I went into MENOPAUSE with the shock of my husband’s death in plane crash

    DR. STELLA CHIJIOKE did a jig when she retired from her top flight job at the Nigerian National Petroleum Corporation (NNPC) last year. Celebrating 60, she danced like she had never done before. Many at the occasion could not help wondering why she was in such an ecstatic mood, but no one was in doubt as to the fact that she had been blessed with a privileged life. Born to a father who had a master’s degree in Education from the Edinburgh University at a time that one could count the cars on Nigerian roads on one’s finger tips, Stella studied Medicine at the University of Nigeria Nsukka. A year later, she stepped into the NNPC and rose through the ranks to the top.

    But the charming Abuja-based health/wellness consultant would never forget the pains of the Bellview plane crash that took her husband’s life, as well as others that made her to retire into caring for people and touching lives.

    “I used to be an active young girl,” she said, reliving her growing up days. “I was an athlete and I represented my schools. I come from a disciplined family, because my parents were primarily teachers. As you would know, the teachers of old were really strict. But if I were not brought up by the type of parents that I had, I am not sure that I would be where I am today.

    “I have seen contemporaries who had it easy when we were young. I actually used to envy them in those days. But today, I thank God because there is no basis for comparison. I was really lucky that God planted me in my parent’s family.”

    “My father retired as a Zonal Education Inspector in Imo State. My mom was originally a school mistress. She then went through more courses in the University of Nigeria, Usukka, using the proximity of the university and ending up as an Administrative Officer there.

    “When my father retired, we had to move from Nsukka to Imo State. It was the period when Chief Sam Mbakwe was the governor. So, my mother worked in the office of the governor until she also retired.”

    Stella Chijioke’s memory of childhood was that of mixed feeling. “Like I said, I used to envy some of my mates then, because they were free. They could go anywhere. Whenever they came to visit me at home, I was always busy doing one thing or another. I was not allowed the frivolity of moving around visiting people. My father would ask you what is happening there that you want to see. He would ask you next about your home work. As a teacher, he drilled the six of us and today we are the better for it.”

    So what did that teach the young Stella?

    “That taught me that you don’t take life for granted; that it is what you sow that you reap. That if you really prepare for life and you have good help, that is, someone or people who lead you in the right path, there is no way your life will not be good, even more that you imagine. With the help of God, any little effort you make yields good result. So, hard work pays. That is the summary of what my early years taught me.

    “And in life, you must have integrity. You may get away with some bad things, but someday, the real you will show up and people who didn’t figure out who you are will find out. But a clean transparent life is better any day.”

    With parents who were constantly on the move, Stella’s education started in Government School, Uyo, where her father was the principal of the Government Teachers Training College.

    “That is the school that was later turned into the University of Uyo. From there, we came on transfer to Nsukka,” she said.

    On a scholarship from the government of Eastern Nigeria, Stella left for Rivers State, to an elite missionary school in those days.

    “I later gained admission into the University of Nigeria, Nsukka to study Medicine and was also privileged to gain scholarship. I had my post graduate degree at the University of Aberdeen, Scotland, in Occupation and Environmental Medicine under the umbrella of the NNPC. After I graduated for my first degree in 1978, the youth service year followed. Then I got a job at NNPC. But the employment actually came one year later.

    I had spent that year working at the Port Harcourt Nursing Home. The irony of it all is that when the job came, we didn’t know it was a privileged job,” she said.

    Stella is proud to have moved around Nigeria. “I used to speak Ibibio,” she said proudly. “Of course, there is nothing a person from Nsukka would say that I would not understand. So, I was able to speak some more languages. I did one year housemanship at the Lagos University Teaching Hospital in Lagos too before my youth service year in Rivers State.”

    For Stella, Rivers State remains a place she would not forget in a hurry. That was where she met her husband; the man who turned out to be everything to her. And even after he died in the ill fated Bellview plane crash on October 22, 2005, Stella refused to let go of his memory.

    It is many years ago, but her voice still betrays emotion when she talks about it.

    She said: “Rivers State was where I met my husband and that was where I got my NNPC job. Even when my husband got a transfer to Lagos for two years, we were still living in Port Harcourt where I had all my children. And that was because I was working at the refinery, the Eleme Petro-chemical, the town clinic which was called the zonal headquarters.

    “I was rising along the line. Before long, I was made Manager, Medical Services and posted to Benin to head the zone before I was later appointed a General Manager (Occupation and Environmental Health Dept) and transferred to Abuja. That was the position I retired from.”

    “Though I lost my mum, the loss of my husband in the Bellview plane crash was a turning point for me! It was too much for me. I went into menopause by shock. It just stopped, till today, it has not flowed!”

    “My husband was a petroleum engineer. He was working with Elf Petroleum, which is now called Total Nigeria Limited. He was one of the general managers. He was actually coming from Port Harcourt. He was an avid golfer. He had gone there for an occasion held by the golf club. He was supposed to have come back with Sosoliso or Chanchangi, which had Abuja-Port Harcourt flights then. Bur because he was a golfer, he said Port Harcourt golf club was having an event, so he went.

    “After 4 pm, he called to say he was still coming to Abuja. I told him that he must have missed the two direct flights. He replied that there would be a flight in Lagos to Abuja. He assured me that he would catch a flight to Abuja that evening from Lagos; that there was a Bellview flight for 7.45 pm, which he could catch that night. And he did.”

    Recalling her late husband’s last moments, she said: “My husband had bought books for my daughter who came from Ghana where she was studying Medicine at the Kwame Nkrumah University of Science and Technology. They had just finished one of the crucial examinations in Medical School. After that, they were to go into the clinical year.

    “She had sent a list of the books she needed and Daddy had said he would buy them. I had asked her how she was going to get them, and she told me that her dad could send them to her in Ghana by courier. So I asked him about the books and he said he would bring them to Abuja. That was when I told him that he had missed the two flights and he told me that he would get a flight from Lagos.

    “When he got to Lagos, he called me to tell me. And when he boarded too, he called. When we spoke on the phone, he asked what I was doing and I told him I was cooking soup. He asked what soup and I told him okro. He asked me to make it green as usual. He told me to freeze it so that he could take it with him on Monday morning when he would be going back. That was our normal routine anyway.”

    “He also told me to send the driver to the airport. It was the driver who called from the airport and told us to on the television. I asked why and asked asked if the plane had landed. He insisted that I switch on the television.

    “I told my daughter what the driver had said, so she said we should on the television. When we did, we saw breaking news on the screen and then the voice came that the Bellview plane was missing. I was dazed. I got up, sat down, got up, sat down.

    “I again called the driver to tell me what was happening at the airport. He told me that they had been called to the tarmac. What followed was the longest 20 minutes of my life, as I waited for him to call me. He didn’t call me after that time. I had to call him again.

    “By the time I called him, he was crying. By this time, the scrolling bar on the television screen was already updating us regarding the news about the missing plane. Sooner, the information came that the Bellview plane got missing from the radar seven minutes after take-off and all efforts to locate it had proved abortive. For me, it was the beginning of the end.”

    “I stuck to myself. The kind of work that I was doing also encouraged me to become a recluse. After my husband died, I went into depression. I lost interest in life. I was asking myself why I was still here. Okay the children are here and I have a job to keep, I kept reminding myself.

    “I lost interest in people. I was not going to parties or any other social event. My routine became from my desk at work, to the house and then to the church. I was such a triangular person. I had no extra activity. I didn’t have anyone who came around to visit! I was not going out to see anyone too.

    “Half of the time when I was alone in the office, I had tears as my companion. I was locked up all to myself. I had only myself to share my pains with. I was not even going to the market. I did not really want to see anybody. I was only seeing the patients who I had to see officially. And that routine is not good for anybody. It was not good for me too.

    My level of activity dropped tremendously. When my husband was alive, we used to socialise a lot. We were good dancers. But all that stopped.”

    As if that was not enough bad news, Stella Chijioke became challenged healthwise. And it was not the kind commonly heard of. “What happened was that my spinal cord collapsed! I had to be evacuated in 2008 from this country to India. My spine had to be operated upon and re-done. Right now, there are so many things that I cannot do.”

    But what could have led to this unusual kind of health challenge?.

    “That is why I am preaching that people should rectify their lifestyles. What led to it is what I am today preaching against as a wellness consultant. We should not take our good health for granted. What happened was that the level of my normal activity went down. From being an active girl, an athlete representing institutions, I was suddenly sitting behind the desk to work for years?

    “Also, I went through four quick pregnancies. I delivered four children within three years and five months. My mum shouted when I had the fourth one. She told me, ‘you are a doctor, why are you doing this to yourself?’ I told her that was how the children came. She said, ‘I don’t expect you to say that. It is not how it should be done. You will pay for it.’ Eventually, I paid for it.”

    “After each pregnancy, the hormones did not go down before I took in again. I was building up hormones again for another pregnancy. So I was returning from each maternity leave, with a new pregnancy. I did that four times. One baby is like ten months older than the next one. And it was unbelievable, but it happened.

    In later years, I met people who knew us in Port Harcourt, who asked me if the children survived. I told them that they all survived. Many of them said they survived because I am a doctor. But my abdominal muscles got weaker and weaker.”

    “My abdominal muscles got weak and they are the things that support the spine. They had been stretched beyond the elastic limit. When my second daughter was going for her master’s programme in Birmingham in the UK, I think I dragged some of the heavy boxes. That was when my spinal cord snapped.

    “I didn’t even feel it that day. It was after I had come back. I stayed two days with her in London, went again with her to Birmingham and stayed another two days. Those days were days of dragging boxes up and down. That happened between September and October.

    “When I got back, by December, the pain came. That was when I did an MIR, which was when it was seen to have collapsed. I had to travel to the East for a wedding. Sitting through that long journey started the pain. I was evacuated to India where I had a major operation. Now I am not allowed to take a flight longer than two hours, and I must be lying down.”

    If Dr. Stella Chijioke thought that those two episodes were enough, the icing on the cake was just ahead.

    She said: “Six weeks after I came back from my spinal cord operation in India, I was kidnapped from my father’s house in Imo State. I was with my younger sister. We went for my mum’s memorial service. I had become all of a sudden a kidnap victim. The ransom was an outrageous amount.

    “My driver managed to call my colleagues at work to alert them on what had happened. It was a sad time for my organisation and they did not take it lightly. The management immediately went into a rescue plan with the Federal Government in an operation which involved the highest security network in the country as at then.”

    “After few days, we were traced to a location between the borders of Akwa Ibom and Abia State, in an uncompleted building. I later heard that the Federal Government gave only two options. And that was, ‘find her or find her!’

    By Saturday of that same week, the government task force had already penetrated the village where we were located. The kidnappers were guarding the house where we were kept. There were no windows. There was a roof but not completely done. It was at the fringe of a forest. The village itself was not developed. You can only go in there through a track. By the second day, they threw in bread and two bags of pure water to us. We hurriedly gobbled it because we were hungry. That was Thursday morning.”

    “By Monday, the government task force under disguise had zeroed down to where we were held captive, through information networking. By Tuesday morning, we were rescued after a shoot-out. After that, I had to leave the country for a while. It was a nasty experience that made me to fear for this country.

    “As to whether they got money from us, they couldn’t get any ransom. But they took some money which was with us when they kidnapped us from the house. That day, they were shooting everywhere.

    “Abroad, I had to go and see a psychotherapist. He took me to those that handled the prisoners of war for America. When two of them saw me, they asked, ‘Madam, how did you survive mentally?’ I answered that I did not know. They said, ‘your husband died suddenly, your children are not with you. All of them are in school. You just got through a major surgery, and then a kidnap trauma. Did you see a psychotherapist when each of these happened?’ I said no.

    “Then they said, ‘after all these, you are still mentally balanced. You are defying the textbooks!’ They said that this kind of thing does not happen to an individual all at once or one after the other; that one or two of them is enough to derail any human being. So they asked me why I did not see a psychotherapist and I told them that in Nigeria, we do not see a psychotherapist; we either have the everyday doctors or psychiatrists. So, if the everyday doctors can’t handle your case, you end up in the asylum. So they laughed and said that I even still had a sense of humour. Well, I told them that I didn’t mean it as humour, but that it is the truth.’

    So, when Stella retired, she had already made up her mind on what she would do. “Though initially I wondered what I would do at retirement, I knew that I did not want to set up a full clinic. I didn’t have the time for that. I knew it would entail a lot. Setting up a full clinic would mean being there 24 hours for the patients, and at 60, with my health challenges, I knew I shouldn’t do it. I know that there is no need biting more than I can chew.

    “Most of the clinics in Abuja are owned by people who are younger, in practice and in age, so I wouldn’t want to be competing with them. What prompted me into caring for people’s wellness was also because I had aged parents. I believed that charity should begin at home.”

    So, Stella Chijioke put together Ultimate Wellness Ltd, an outfit that creates awareness, guides and cares for members of the public, advising them on how to spend money when they are not ill.

    “We are not treating people when they are ill per se. We want to let you know the vital information that where you live, what you eat and what you do contribute a lot to the disease, sickness or illness that you have now or would have later in life. We are not your primary physician but we tell you that there are things you must do to change the pattern of things around you, that will make you healthy, and this is doable.

    “I take people through a wellness plan. Everybody can be managed better, notwithstanding the illness such as diabetes, hypertension, stroke, obesity and so on. Somebody can still have a fulfilling life despite having all these sickness. For instance, acute diabetes can be reversed and the blood sugar brought down and lifestyle changed. This has been proven.”

    To prove it further, Dr. Chijioke sets a good example of a healthy lifestyle. “In time past, I did not use to take breakfast. I thought that was a good way of managing my weight. But now, I know that it is not the best way. I got to know at NNPC when I was putting this together. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. If there is any meal not to be missed, it is breakfast.

    “The actual meal to be missed for me is dinner. When you eat heavy meal and carry it to bed, that is when the body does all the storing, which you don’t need. I have late lunch at 4pm or 5pm. It you are between the age of 45 and 60, you have to reduce the quantity of your food intake. You eat smaller quantities of food. Don’t overload food in your tummy.

    “I drink lots of water. As women, we are all expected to have eight to ten glasses of water every day. For men, it is ten glasses of water every day. That is the minimum. In hot Africa, we are expected to drink even more because we are always expending. Water helps us to detoxify from the environmental, natural toxins and even those we get from food and drinks.

    “For drinks, I take fresh fruits which must not be stored in the refrigerator for long. For exercise, which is very important, I get it from dancing. These days, I do that in the church. People do not know why I dance that much in church, but the truth is, it is a form of exercise for me. It is a form of activity, which my body needs so much. Of course, I also dance in church to glorify God.

    “Now I am involved. I am beginning to go out, to socialise. I used to be a dancer. My husband and I attended parties together a lot. And any party we went, we were the life of the party. We used to do floor ‘dance’ shows at parties, with people surrounding us and clapping.

    “I have been to parties lately. Even at wedding these days, I have started dancing again. Right now, I cannot go to night parties because I don’t have a companion. But I have resumed my dancing.”

    As a woman who has gone through these life traumas, what is her advice to people who may be facing challenges? “My answer is that they must have faith in God who makes the difference. You have to have God as pillar to hold you at such times when all fails. Hold on to Him, because He is already holding unto you.”

  • I’ve not had sex since I was 17; am I still a virgin?

    No. you’re no longer a virgin in the real sense of the word, but you may be described as a second generation virgin. What made you have sex at 11? I want to believe you were raped. Well, many people wish they could return to virginity and are choosing to become second-generation virgins. Second-Generation Virginity is a choice to abstain from sex again for a period of time. For some, that period of time is a few months; for others a few years or until marriage.

    You may be thinking you had sex too soon and I think so too. Becoming a second-generation virgin is one way to strongly state to others and to yourself that you have decided to abstain from sex. The origin of the word “virgin” is from the Greek word “Virgo,” often associated with goddesses of power. For some, second-generation virginity is a reclaiming of power and control over one’s body. Reclaiming your sexuality: When someone forces or pressures you to have sex, or makes you feel your virginity was “stolen,” it doesn’t feel like that should be your “first time.” Your first time having sex is special, and no one has the right to take that from you. If being raped or pressured into sex has happened to you, you’re not alone. There is support, and your real “first time” is still to come. Second-generation virginity allows you to reclaim your virginity in such cases.

  • From you to me

    •Re: Things men love about our bodies: You tried ma but you missed out the very obvious one – breasts (boobs)… Great day and best wishes. Segun (07056844966).

    •Good morning Aunty. Words cannot explain how grateful I am to you . I used the drug for the very first time last night as directed and wish you were there… My girl was awed by how I could go on and on without getting limp as before. I can’t thank you enough. Thanks. Segun from Ibadan.

    •I pray Almighty God go before you as a consuming fire and destroy all the plans of the enemies against you and your family this season in Jesus name, amen. Pastor Smith (08033302737).

    Happy new month and happy weekend dear ma. More grease to your elbow while wishing you the protection of the Almighty god always in Jesus name, amen. Best wishes and excellent regards always from Efuntade alani Olusegun, 08065334335.

    Thanks for all you’re doing. You will not see shame at the end of your life. Extend my greetings to your family in general. Kafaya (08153270847).

    •Joy is the most chesished by the heart. May God bless you with enduring joy. May His grace be a sword for you in the battles of life. May He favour you with infinite blessings, amen. 07038437926.

    •Thanks for your kindness to me. You’re a very kind woman. Your business will have no success limit. God bless you. Brian, Port-Harcourt, (08033137713).

  • Screening canvassed for early detection of hypertension, diabetes, others

    How can Nigerians reduce risk of developing terminal diseases? It is by being moderate in whatever they do, especially their food intake say Lagos State Deputy Governor, Mrs Adejoke Orelope-Adefulire, wife of the governor, Dame Abimbola Fashola and chairman of Mosan Okunola Local Council Development Area (LCDA), Mr Abiodun Mafe.

    Nigerians they said, should be wary of the food they eat so as not to endanger their health.

    This was contained in the messages to residents at the screening for diabetes, hypertension and cancers in the 57 local governments and LCDAs of the state.

    They listed healthy life styles such as regular exercises, moderate alcohol consumption, avoidance of smoking, eating and drinking in moderation and regular health screening as ways of reducing the risk of falling victim to killer diseases such as hypertension, diabetes as well as prostate, cervix and breast cancers.

    The event and the first round of integrated statewide wellness health week was held at Rauf Aregbesola Primary Health Centre, Mosan-Okunola, Local Council Development Area (LCDA), Ipaja.

    According to the trio, embracing healthy life styles and paying proper attention to healthy living habits will not only reduce the risk of falling victim to these killer diseases but also help prevent it.

    The deputy governor, represented by the Permanent Secretary in the Ministry of Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation, Mrs Risikat Akiode, said it was in realisation of the need to prevent the killer diseases that the government initiated the wellness health week aimed for the screening of hypertension and diabetes as well as prostate, cervix and breast cancers.

    She said hypertension, diabetes and cancers are some of the non communicable diseases that have become prevalent and responsible for over 60 per cent of deaths in the world, adding that if the trend continues unchecked, the diseases are expected to account for 73 per cent of deaths and 60 per cent of the disease burden in the year 2020.

    ”It is against this background that our administration has come up with this initiative, which also aims to increase the tempo of sensitisation and awareness to maximally help prevent, reduce these diseases and improve the health status of Lagosians”, Mrs Orelope-Adefulire said.

    Mrs Fashola called on residents to take advantage of the week-long integrated health screening present to get screened for hypertension, diabetes, breast, cervical and prostate cancers.

    She enjoined them to always visiting primary health centers for checks.

    ”Please be aware that these diseases do not present any noticeable symptoms until at the late stages, then it will be too expensive to treat and manage and could lead to loss of life of our bread winners,”she added.

    Mafe said the rate at which Nigerians die of non-communicable diseases calls for serious concern, calling on all residents to seize the opportunity of the free health screening to do a thorough medical check-up to know their health status.

    He said: “The event is not fun-fair but a programme aimed at bringing awareness to our people between about the killer diseases. The World Health Organisation (WHO) statistic shows that 22 percent of the Nigerian population is affected by high blood pressure, which is called a silent killer because it does not show sign or symptoms till it might be too late.”

    The council boss lamented that proliferation of fake blood pressure measuring devices and popular diet like some brand of noodles people consume had made Nigerians at risk of terminal diseases.

    Also speaking, Special Adviser to the Lagos State Governor on Public Health, Dr. Yewande Adeshina said the programme is put up due to inadequate knowledge and awareness of the symptoms, signs and effects of the diseases.

    “The goals of this programme are to detect early asymptomatic and undiagnosed clients with NCDs and to prevent complications through prompt, effective treatment and referral of diagnosed cases. Following the continuous and sustainable sensitisation and public enlightenment of the entire populace of these diseases, it is expected that the turnout would increase considerably,” she said.

    Adeshina explained that the screening for hypertension and diabetes will take place concurrently in the 20 LGAs and 37 LCDAs using screening sites selected in the LGAs and LCDAs adding that the screening for cancers of the breast, cervix and prostate will take place in one LGA per senatorial districts, that is; Alimosho, Lagos Island and

     

  • The mistress (4)

    I consoled myself with the fact that I was still young and fertile enough to have more children especially sons. I was ready to do anything in my quest to give my husband male issues as I felt instinctively that our future happiness depended on it. I confided my worries to one of my aunties and she promised to help. She said she knew a powerful man of God, a prophet who could help ‘turn my womb so I can only give birth to sons.’

    One day, she took me to this man who prayed for me and applied some funny smelling ointment on my stomach. He assured me that my womb would only produce males from then on.

    I believed him so much that when I became pregnant again some time later, I bought clothes for a baby boy. So, you could imagine my disappointment when I had another girl. Don’t get me wrong, I love my daughters and I think the world of them. But we live in a society where the male child is highly sought after and a woman who can’t give her husband males is deemed a failure, one who has not fully fulfilled her role as a wife.

    This time around, when Frank heard I had given birth to another girl, he did not even bother to show up at the hospital. It was one of my elder brothers who came to pay the bills and take me and the baby home. And it was two days after, that he came home from wherever he had gone to. I noticed immediately that he was quite withdrawn. He did not show interest in me or the baby unlike in my previous deliveries.

    I tried to find out what was the matter, but he refused to say anything. Then one day, he simply flared up when I asked him to help me keep an eye on the baby while I took a quick shower.

    “Am I now your baby nurse that I should carry the baby? Take her with you or leave her there! Don’t bother me!” he said.

    “But Frank, what’s wrong with your helping me with the baby? She’s your daughter afterall!” I pointed out.

    “Yes! She’s my daughter and that’s the problem! There are just too many of them! You think I married you to fill my house with girls? Woman, you better wake up to your responsibilities or else…! with that he picked up his car keys and hurriedly left the house.

    I knew I had to give him a son or my marriage would be in jeopardy. But try as I could, I could not conceive again. It was as if my womb just closed up. Worse still, my relationship with my husband continued to deteriorate. Before, he would come home straight from work as soon as he closed to spend time with me. Now, I hardly saw him. Sometimes, he would stay out for days and return without explanations. To keep the peace in our home, I did not ask questions about where he had been.

    Later, I started hearing stories of his escapades with other women outside. A friend of mine even saw him at a swanky hotel in town one day with a lady and told me how he was all over her. I ignored all these stories and focused on taking care of my children, all the while praying that God would remember me and give me a son.

    Things got worse, however. We had been together for about seven years when Frank simply walked out on me one day. I had gone out that day and returned to see him dragging some suitcases downstairs. His driver was standing nearby to help load the bags in the boot of his jeep outside.

    “Where are you going, Frank? You didn’t tell me you were traveling,” I stated, eyeing the bags.

    “As you can see, I’m leaving,” he said shortly.

    “What do you mean, leaving? To where?” I asked, my heart beating fast with fear probably.

    “Can’t you get it? I’m going away! I’m leaving you! And for your own good, don’t bother looking for me!” he said, as he moved outside to the car park. I followed quickly, shocked at the turn of events. I knew we were having problems but not to the extent of abandoning me and his family. How could he?

    I was not ready to lose my husband so going down on my knees, I pleaded with him to reconsider.

    “Please, Frank, you can’t do this to me! Don’t go, honey! Think of the children! They need you. And I can’t live without you!”

    But he ignored my pleadings and hurriedly getting into his car, drove away. It’s been over a year now and I have not set eyes on my husband. We only speak on phone when he calls to enquire about the children. I’ve pleaded and sent people to him to give me another chance but he remains adamant. Worse, I heard he has started living with another lady in one of his other properties in town and he is planning to marry her.

    To be fair to him, he still takes care of us by giving me money for our upkeep. But that’s not what I want. I want my husband back. Some people might think what happened to me is the law of karma or nemesis considering what happened to Frank’s first wife. Or I should have paid attention to my mother’s advice as they were words of wisdom from an elder. Whatever.

    Truth is, I still love and want my husband and I will do anything to get him back. He is not actually a bad person but his obsession for a son has beclouded his judgement. So, what should I do to win him back? Thank you.

    •Concluded

    •What do you think Nicole should do next?

    •Send comments/advice/suggestions to psaduwa@yahoo.com, psaduwa007@gmail.com or 08023201831. The best feedback will be published soon!

    •Names have been changed to protect Nichole’s identity and other individuals in the story

     

  • 9 Signs your bad relationship is affecting your life

    When you are in a bad relationship, it’s hard to actually watch out for the signs your bad relationship is affecting your life and really messing with your personality. Bad relationships can be extremely unhealthy for your entire body, your mood and can really cause your personality to change. If you are trying to find out some signs your bad relationship is affecting your life, take a look at my list below.

    1. Weight Loss: This is probably one of the most common signs your bad relationship is affecting your life. Are you constantly losing weight? Are you constantly slimming down without meaning to? Do you drop weight in no time at all, just because of the stress of your relationship? Watch out for this girls, it might be nice to lose the weight, but you want to do it the healthy way and this is unhealthy.

    2. Depression: Depression is another common sign that your bad relationship is affecting your life. Do you even want to go out of the house? Do you constantly feel down and can’t remember exactly what joy and happiness feel like anymore? These are things to watch out for

    3. Constant Crying: Crying is something that a lot of people experience when they are in a fight in a relationship, but if you are crying every day, every night and at random times, is that normal? No! You shouldn’t constantly feel like you need to cry, your relationship should make you happy, not this stressed out!

    4. Walking on Eggshells: Do you have a constant feeling that you can’t speak your mind? That if you do, it’ll only upset your partner and then it’ll turn into a huge fight? Truthfully, you should be able to be honest in your relationship and if you are always walking on eggshells, it can bleed into your life outside of your relationship too.

    5. No Self Esteem: Your self esteem can be extremely hard to build up, but it can also be really fragile once you do. If you are losing your self esteem because your partner is constantly putting you down, that’s not a good feeling. It’s also not healthy at all.

    6. Secluded: Remember when I said that with depression, you don’t want to go out? Well, being secluded actually holds true as well. This is when you don’t even want to leave the house. Doing anything is an huge inconvenience for you and can even make you feel sick!

    7. Being Pulled in Too Many Directions: When you are in a really bad relationship, you can feel like you are constantly being pulled in too many directions. This is especially true if your partner is needy and is always pulling your attention away. Remember, you need to slow down and take time for yourself too.

    8. Weight Gain: While some people might lose weight, weight gain is another common sign that your bad relationship is affecting your life. If you are an emotional eater, you could constantly be eating everything in sight and you can’t quit. That’s how you deal with being in your relationship. That’s hard!

    9. Moodiness: Finally, how are your moods? Are they constantly swinging from one end of the spectrum to the next? That alone could be a sign that your relationship is not stable and that you are fearing for something and that it’s affecting your life.

    So girls, these are all of my signs that your unhealthy relationship is affecting your life. What other signs are out there? Give them up!