Tag: husband

  • It’s sad my  husband didn’t live to see what I’ve become, says Lanre Hassan

    It’s sad my husband didn’t live to see what I’ve become, says Lanre Hassan

    After more than 50 years of acting, veteran actress, Lanre Hassan, aka Iya Awero, in a chat with The Nation revealed that she feels pained that her husband did not live to see what she has become today, as one of the top cross-over actresses whose name is known home and abroad.

    Having lost two children while shooting, she said, “It is so painful that my husband did not live up till this moment to see what I have become today. He was very patient and understanding.

    “I didn’t see any cause to remarry because doing that means I have to start all over again. I already have children and I just decided to focus on them. Having another marriage might lead to neglecting of my children, and I didn’t want that,” explaining why she didn’t remarry.

    “Even when I lost two children while shooting and had people saying all sort of things, like spiritual attack, we didn’t believe in that, because my God is sufficient enough,” she added.

  • Toyin Aimakhu, husband  renew vows

    Toyin Aimakhu, husband renew vows

    Nollywood couple, Toyin Aimakhu and Adeniyi Johnson celebrate their second wedding anniversary yesterday.

    They made headlines recently with rumours of break-up. And perhaps to show that they are really still together, their second anniversary provided the opportunity, as the Tinsel star and his actress wife both took to their Instagram page to renew their affection for each other.

    Toyin wrote: “It has been two spectacular years with my Rib and I bless the Lord everyday for sending me such a good, patient, loving and good hearted man. Marriage is a lot of work and commitment, it isn’t easy but you are doing your best to continue to make it work and I pray that the good Lord gives us grace to celebrate many more years together.

    “I love you my husband, God knew exactly what He was doing when He sent you to me and may God continue to give you all that makes a man a real man. Thanks to you all for your support, love and prayers during the good times and the time of challenges. God bless us. Happy wedding Anniversary Okomi,” she added.

    Responding, Niyi says: “Seconds turns to minutes, minutes to hours, hours to days, days to weeks, weeks to months and months to year and year turning to years…Your love, your uniqueness, your strength and weaknesses make me love you as the day unfolds. You became not just a friend but my best friend… not just a wife but my mum, not just my woman but my eternal companion… God bless the day I met you… through the thick and rough, through the rain and shine you stood and still standing (melo melo in @baddo_ybnl voice) even (when they fire catapult of envy in @reekadobanks voice)…. God’s love and grace prevailed….. Thank you for bringing sunshine to my world… I love you now and forever…… please help me celebrate my WIFE!!!!! @aimakhutoyin… All Glory to GOD.”

  • ‘My husband has stopped eating my food’

    A middle-age woman, Ruth Abah, is seeking the dissolution of her six-year-old marriage to her husband Abel, at an Agege Customary Court in Lagos.

    She said her woes began in 2011 when her husband stopped eating at home.

    “I was six months pregnant when my husband stopped eating my food. On several occasions, I asked him what I did but he never gave an answer. It went on for eight months and three weeks but my husband never gave a reason for his actions,” she said.

    The petitioner added that her husband is fond of beating her.

    She said: “He beats me over trivial issues. He also went to the extent of buying his own foodstuff to the house. At times we fight over our stove.”

    Mrs Abah said she left her matrimonial home 2011 with their baby because the torture was too much, adding that her husband traced her to the house she rented and beat her mercilessly.

    “The love between us turned cold immediately we got married. I realised he loved me while we were courting. I want dissolution and I want him to cater for our child because I have been single-handedly taking care of our son for over three months,” she said.

    Defending himself, the respondent, said his wife she left the house of her own volition.

    “I got back from work one day and I realised that my wife wasn’t at home. I didn’t know why she left because we had no issue that day. We are both responsible for our child’s school fees. I am fine with the dissolution because I have someone else,” he said.

    The court’s President, Pa Adekunle Williams, ordered the respondent to pay N15, 000 as the child’s three-month outstanding allowance. He adjourned the matter till July 23.

  • ‘My husband abandoned me for no reason’

    •Man: our union is bad omen

    A middle-age woman, Sophia Arapogun, has prayed an Agege Customary Court in Lagos to dissolve her 11-year-old marriage because her husband, Patrick, abandoned her for two years.

    Mrs Arapogun, who lives with her husband and his six children from his previous marriage, said he never asked her how she fed.

    “My husband buys foodstuff for his children and asks them to keep it in their room. He never asked what I needed at a particular moment and we lived together,” she said.

    The petitioner said her husband came home at a time to sprinkle something that looked like blood all over the house, adding that she worked as a clerical officer in her husband’s hospital.

    She said: “I used to package melon to sell in neighbouring markets but since my husband didn’t like the idea, he employed me in his hospital. There was a day I took N300 to take passport photograph, he shouted at me in the presence of his children and I felt humiliated. I was more shocked when he made sure I refunded the money.”

    She is seeking an accommodation from him as compensation if her petiton is granted.

    Patrick said he married her because he heard a pathetic story about her, adding: “I asked if she had any evil spirit or medical problems which didn’t make her conceive during her two previous marriages but she said no; then I married her.”

    The respondent, a doctor, said after their marriage, he discovered that three minutes after making love to her, he got a knock or slap on his head.

    “Not only did I get a knock, whenever I had the intention of sleeping with her, I had rashes on my manhood or my manhood twisted. At times, I did not get erection or my sperm seized. Since then, I became afraid of everything,” Arapogun said.

    He said his hospital crumbled after his wife began to work with him, adding that she stole money on several occasions.

    “When we lived together, there were times my wife left the bedroom and returned in the morning without any explanation. Our union is bad omen. I have suffered from swollen legs, slight stroke and it was when I realised my wife defecates in the bucket I used to bathe that I decided to leave with my children because I was not ready to die young and I don’t know what was going to happen next,” he said. The couple have no issue.

    The court’s President, Pa Adekunle Williams, ordered the petitioner to maintain peace and adjourned the matter till July 13 for further hearing.

  • ‘God gave my husband victory’

    The wife of Oyo State Governor ,Mrs Florence Ajimobi, has said God helped her husband break the second term jinx.

    Mrs. Ajimobi spoke at the Women Intercessory Network (WIN) prayer programme at the Government House Arcade, Agodi, Ibadan.

    She said: “I was scared of federal might and the way they were going around using money to influence the electorate.

    “I knew we couldn’t match them because Ajimobi doesn’t have the money but God was with him.

    “If you remember when we had our programme in January, I stood before God and said if we win by God’s grace that I will testify.

    “The road was tough and I nearly lost my faith, but I committed everything to God.

    “God did not allow the enemies to mock us. The governor is here to serve humanity and that is why God has given him the second term victory. “

  • It was love at first sight when I met my husband

    It was love at first sight when I met my husband

    How do you cope seeing that at 10pm, you are still at work, when do you find time to rest?

    I thank God for everything. When you believe in God, somehow, He finds a way to give you rest. He gives you the strength to find rest. God finds time for me to rest. As clearing agents and shipping agents, we have so many products. Sometimes I leave the office late in the night. As shipping agents, we are at work whenever the ship comes around because we have to monitor our products. Out here, we have to be on our toes. Our customers are sensitive, we realise that so we treat them well. And we are always there for them. So in such a situation, it is God who provides time for me to rest.

    How do you balance being a working mother with the home front?

    As a mother, I love children. Thank God that they are grown up and are now in the universities and secondary schools. I create time to be with my children. What I do is that on weekends, I find time to be with them and we go out, hang around shopping malls, just having a day out together. Also, my husband finds time to be around me. He comes around my office too.

    You are a popular face in social circles, how does that affect your lifestyle?

    There is the good side of it, and then the bad side of it. The good side is that I am likeable, friends come around me and a lot of people also want to do one business or the other with me. Being popular is actually also good for business. But the bad side is that one has to be wary of the people you meet or do business with. There are also people who feel bad about one’s popularity and really go out to try to hurt people. So when you are popular, you still have to be careful.

    What businesses are you into?

    I thank God that my business has grown a lot from the trading that I used to do. These days, I am into maritime business. We are involved in import and export businesses, clearing and forwarding, consultancy, interior furnishings and supply business. I have a group of companies; one part is involved in importation and another part is into sales of electronics.

    I am also a contractor to some state and federal governments. I have franchise for Samsung products and we import too. We feed the market with our household appliances. That is apart from the clearing, forwarding and shipping work that we do. We have also ventured into the oil and gas industry. We started Arikay Oil & Gas Company 10 years ago. So I can simply say that, as at today, what we have presently is a group of companies.

    What attracted you to your husband?

    He is my God-given husband. You know when God gives you a husband, you will never have a problem.

    Does he support you in your businesses?

    Yes he does. He is a hardworking man. So when such a man has a wife who is equally hard working, who is also a good wife, he will not have any excuse but to support such a wife. It is also important that a wife is trusted, because when a man has a wife that he trusts, he will wholeheartedly support her in all the things that she does. So my husband is always there for me. He knows that our lives are better because he gives me the opportunity to assist him.

    Why does your husband trust you?

    My husband trusts me because he has the fear of God and so do I. The trust that we have between us has helped our marriage. The truth is that if a husband and a wife do not trust each other, definitely, the marriage will collapse. I am glad that my husband and I love each other passionately. We are actually like twins.

    So what will you say has been the secret of your marriage?

    The secret has been that we do not keep any secret from each other. We tell each other everything. We share everything.

    Your advice to married couple?

    Couples should trust each other. A husband and wife must put God first in everything they are doing. It is important that they do not lie to each other. Wives, especially should not keep boyfriends. They should not be involved in extra-marital affairs as that kills relationship fast. I am shocked that some wives today have boyfriends all over the place.

    I believe that women, especially should not be sharing matters about their husbands with people outside their home. That is because in sharing such matters, one will not know who among the persons she is sharing their marriage secrets with will use it against them. Some of the women they are sharing their marital secrets with may be interested in her husband. I advise that wives make their husbands their father, friend and everything.

    Do you take holidays with your family?

    We all went on holiday last year in Dubai. Hopefully, this year we will be in America or Switzerland for holidays. But let me tell you the truth, I love going out on holidays like that with my family. But I really do not want to go far away like that. I want to holiday around here in Nigeria or even Africa with my family. I really urge that African governments and especially Nigerian leaders develop this country so that we can have facilities and infrastructure that will make life convenient and enjoyable.

    I love Dubai. Last year and the previous year when I was in Dubai, I couldn’t help but remember the first time that I started going there some many years ago. I started comparing what it was then and what it is now, and I couldn’t help but glorify God at the marvellous change that has taken place over there.

    I pray that Nigeria becomes like that too soon so that people will be coming from their countries around the world to do tourism here too. It would be lovely if we can have visitors from abroad come for summer here. I pray for this new government so that they can give us regular electricity, water and life. This is Africa. We are well endowed with natural resources.

    You have talked so much about God. So can we say you are a religious person?

    I am a good Christian. I love God, without Him, I will not be where I am today.

    You have indeed been active in the business of clearing and forwarding, that is not usually a female terrain.

    When I started, it wasn’t but now, the women are there in full force. If you look around, you will notice that the women have taken their due position in the business and are also doing very well. We women are more reliable (laughs) and we are always out to ensure that we impress our clients.

    Do you think that your background help shaped the person that you are today?

    Of course, when you have a good background, with parents who spent time to teach you about life, then it is likely that you will be okay. I come from a Christian royal family, where we were taught the principles of living, how to relate with people, how to handle the issue of trust and how not to get involved with bad friends. I thank God for my background. My parents taught us well. But my father is late now. My mother is still around; before long, she will be 90. I want God to give her more life.

    How did you start out in business?

    I started quite early, that was when I was in school. I started with my parents who were also in one business or another. You just need to be hard-working, focused and be prayerful. From the beginning of my life, I worked very hard. I would say l inherited the business side of life from my mother. That is because I used to follow her to work. She mentored me in business. It was from there that I made money early in life going as far to the North as a food distributor, among other things.

    How did you meet your husband?

    The first time I saw him, I knew he would be my husband. It was indeed love at first sight. I loved his countenance immediately. I noticed he is a calm person and I fell in love with his patience. He is actually a nice man. He is also honest.

    Your first car..?

    (Laughs) My first car was an orange coloured Volkswagen Jetta car. But even then, as at the time I bought it, it was considered an expensive, luxury car. Then when you had a Volkswagen car among your friends, you were considered ‘a big girl.’ Owning a car then even meant you were on the upper social ladder.

    What is your style these days?

    I love lace, I wear that a lot. I love to look good, I like to dress well and be neat. I love it when there is a rhythm in the colours that I wear, and one colour matches another. You know that Nigerian ladies dress fashionably well. I can say that Nigerian ladies are number one in fashion. Without Nigerian ladies, most shops in Korea, Austria, Switzerland and other such places will suffer a recession. People don’t wear those fashionable materials there.

    You have been identified with philanthropy in recent times, are you considering going into politics?

    Never! Everybody cannot go into politics. I will rather continue to spend and support people in politics. And I want to commend the democratic process that has led to the hope for change that has just taken place. It is commendable to know that as a nation, we are finally developing principles. I am happy with the political change in the country. It has already reflected in the activities at the port. The officials of the Nigerian Custom Services are very much newly improved and they are doing great presently in ports operations. Right now, containers can be cleared within two days. You can even do some services same day. So right now, no demurrage, the Lagos port has been decongested, while Apapa road has been cleared of traffic. So the change is here.

    Are you happy with the role women are playing today in Nigeria?

    Yes, I am. The truth is that, I see more and more women becoming great in life, impacting more people and doing well. Women are daily aspiring into greatness, they are in business, they are intelligent and they are daily achieving in all spheres of life. There are women accountants, judges, engineers; they have even become senators and ministers. Sooner they will be governors and president in Nigeria. I see that happening soon.

    Your husband dotes on you with much affection, do you ever have issues?

    I don’t know of any marriage that does not have its ups and downs but I can say once again that I love everything in my husband just as he loves me. The way you see him, that is just the way he is. He is very understanding. Sometimes I work late and get home late. But he would be there for me. We handle our family matters between us. No matter how successful a woman is, she should be submissive to her husband. Part of my success is actually the fact that I am submissive to my husband. I respect him a lot and you know in such a situation, respect also begets respect.

    Have you ever had a nasty experience?

    Yes, when you are in business, different things are abound to happen. But I thank God that He has been kind and made a lot of things favourable for me. There have been cases where there were misjudgements over a decision, but the fact that I have focus and I am intelligent helps.

  • Husband seeks refund of dowry

    A middle-aged-man, Collins Nduka, has pleaded with an Ojo Customary Court in Lagos to order his wife, Sefinat, to refund N1.4 million he spent on marrying her.

    Collins told the court that his wife, whom he married three years ago, had decided to abandoned her matrimonial home for more than a year.

    “I would want a refund of the amount that I spent as marriage and dowry expenses because she has become unfaithful.

    “My wife is not faithful to the marriage because she has other relationships apart from me and I don’t love her anymore. After all, she has not given birth to any child for me.

    “The most painful thing is that she has packed all my belongings in my house to an unknown place in addition to her emptying my shop which I stocked with over N750, 000,” he said.

    According to him, the three-year-old marriage is being threatened and every bit of her action portrays her as someone no longer interested in the union.

    “I invited my friends from outside the country to make the marriage an expensive one and after it, she wants to leave me for another man, I need my dowry so she can be free,” Nduka said.

    He pleaded with the court to dissolve the marriage and order Sefinat to return his belongings and money so that he could continue with his life.

    Sefinat, who was not in court, had earlier said she did not cart away her husband’s property.

    She said that she was ready for the divorce.

    The court President, Chief Joseph Ogunmola, while advising the husband on the dangers of divorce, instructed that the respondent be invited to court.

    “The court does not dissolve any marriage except in extreme cases, we need the consent of both parties before judgment so she must be invited,” he said.

    Ogunmola, adjourned the case to May19.

  • That my  husband will  now stay in  Abuja with  me is prayer  answered Adeleke’s  wife Nike

    That my husband will now stay in Abuja with me is prayer answered Adeleke’s wife Nike

    It was victory celebration last Sunday at the Adeleke’s country home in Ede, Osun State. The celebration was necessitated by the recent victory of Senator Isiaka Adeleke at the recent election, where he won a seat to the National Assembly in the next political dispensation. Though, impromptu as the party was, the turnout was large, as the spacious compound was filled with family members, party people, friends and well-wishers. At the middle of it all was Nike Adeleke, the Senator’s amiable wife, who co-ordinated the hosting and ensured that laughter and merriment flowed all through the evening till late night. Nike Adeleke hails from Osogbo from the family of Omidiran, the second girl in the family of eight children. In this interview, the Abuja-based fabric merchant tells us about life as a mother, an international business woman and wife of  a popular politician. She spoke to PAUL UKPABIO. 

    Tell us a bit about your background and what attracted you to being a business woman?

    My dad was a cocoa merchant; so when we were growing up, he was always telling us that business was in the family. I guess that just stuck in me. And today, I am a businesswoman, I deal in fabrics, I go to Austria, Switzerland and every other place in the world where good fabrics can be found. I think I got all that from the kind of background that I grew up in, although my mom was a full time house wife. She was not going outside the home to work. However, she used to tell me that it is not good for a woman not to be occupationally involved in the society. She was actually a nurse before she got married to my father. She was always telling me how she missed the lifestyle of a working lady. That encouraged me to be a working mother. My father is still very much alive, we thank God for that; his name is Alhaji Ahmed Omidiran; he is the Asiwaju of Osogbo.

    Your marital home is in Ede, Osun State, but you live in Abuja, any special reason for that?

    After my marriage, I decided to live in Abuja. That was because I found Abuja to be very quiet, very much like Osogbo, so I chose to stay there. I actually had to choose between Abuja and Lagos. So, I opted for Abuja because of the serene nature of the city. That was in year 2000.

    Why did you choose to deal in fabrics?

    It is because I love fashion. When I was young, I stayed with my aunt at a time. She used to sell fabrics. That must have been the time that I fell in love with the business. I lived with her for about two years. Within that period, I learnt the in and out of the business. So it was easy for me when I wanted to set up in business, that was after school.

    So after school, you berthed a store at highbrow Adetokunbo Ademola in Abuja, and decided to clothe the rich?

    (Laughs) Not particularly. At my Abuja store, for instance, you can find clothes worth N10,000. Just as you can also find in there clothes worth N500,000. It is a one-stop shop where you can get everything you want. But you know, I am also into tailoring business. I have tailors; we make clothes for the high and mighty and of course for everybody. That aspect of the business helps to occupy my my time a lot because it involves lot of work, constant thinking, creativity, dealing with people and so on. I like the tailoring business. When I first got to Abuja, I wanted to start with both aspects of the business. That is, sale of fabrics and tailoring. But my husband advised me to start with one. So I chose the sale of fabrics. It was after about 10 years that I included the tailoring aspect to the business. That aspect has always been a passion for me.

    How are you coping with both now?

    It is not exactly easy, but I thank God. It is actually wonderful because it allows me to do what I love doing. So I cannot complain.

    Do you actually take part in sewing the clothes too?

    Yes I take part, but I must also confess that I am still learning and learning fast too every new day.

    Let’s talk about family life; how do you cope shuttling between Abuja and Ede in Osun State and then also your travels abroad, more so as your husband is also always on the move?

    It’s the grace of God. It’s been God who has been there for us. We have somehow been living ‘apart’ in the last four years; so you can understand that it’s really been the grace of God shuttling between Ede and Abuja. It has not been easy. Moreover, I do not like flying, so I was always on the road. Also my children, I took them to Offa, but had to take them back again to Abuja because the travelling was just too much. They are all with me now and there are three of them.

    Do you have time for relaxation and leisure?

    (Laughs) Yes. Once a year, I close my eyes, take the children, leave everything behind and go on holiday for a month. That is when I am always assured of personal relaxation and leisure.

    Does your husband join you on such holidays?

    Yes, he does even if it is for few weeks.

    Tell us about some of your best moments so far in life.

    Best moments, I can say that God has been good to the family, so we are always having good moments. For instance, on the 28th of March, we had another good moment in the family when my husband contested for a senatorial seat in the National Assembly and won. It has been a thing of joy to us. God has been wonderful to us, we had weddings in the family, we have had many ‘best’ moments. God has been gracious to us. To Him be the glory.

    What is it like being married to a successful politician like Senator Isiaka Adeleke?

    I am sure you can see what it is like here in the house. You can see the crowd. And it is like this 24/7. Sometimes in the night when my husband is coming into the bedroom, I will hear him telling people, ‘Please go back, or do you want to follow me into my bedroom? Or don’t you want me to sleep?’ And that would probably be around 3am. (Paused a while to reflect) It is not easy though, I am part of it now. I do not mind because that is his life. It is a sacrifice that I am happy that I am making for the family.

    The general elections are over and your husband has been victorious, he is now Abuja-bound. How do you feel?

    I must say that all the glory goes to God. I give Him the glory because it is wonderful that he won. Four years ago, it was not the same story. That is the reason why we have to thank God. I am very happy about his success.

    With the new development, that means he is going to be fully Abuja based once again.

    Oh dear (laughs), that is a prayer answered (laughs heartily again). It is a good development, I am happy about it and I also know that the children are happy and very excited about it since the children and I live in Abuja, he is going to be with us. However, I also know that we should be expecting the crowd too (laughs). I know that I will have to accept him and also accept the crowd that will follow him.

    What do you remember about childhood?

    I was the eighth child in a big family. Growing up was a delightful experience because being a big family, I had brothers, sisters, cousins, to play with. There were even some of the extended family members who lived with us. There were lots of children to play with; so I enjoyed my childhood.

    What appeals to you?

    That I will say is being in the presence of God. That indeed appeals to me. That is just what I like doing. I like to be among people, family and friends who influence me to do positive things, who give me ideas on how to do positive things in order to contribute to the development of our society, and also to help the less-privileged around me. That actually makes me happy. I love to give. I learnt that from my husband. He is a giver, well known for his giving nature. I like doing that as well.

    What fashion things attract you?

    Now, that is my department. I love shoes and most good fashionable things. I can tell you that women love either shoes, bags, clothes or jewellery.

    And what vanities of life have you found difficult to resist?

    I feel bad when I spend money on things that are mostly considered unnecessary. Sometimes I later on scold myself on why I spend such money on what I really didn’t need to spend money on, especially when I later on realise that I could have used that same money to help somebody.

    In your opinion, are Nigerian ladies fashionable?

    Yes, Nigerian ladies are fantastic. Sometimes, it is not easy to catch up with Nigerian fashion. That is because it is always on the move. Nigerian ladies are very fashionable; they are exposed, they go out a lot and buy. When you enter a shop abroad, and they get to find out that you are a Nigerian, they get excited. That is because they know that they are going to sell. It is like that in my store as well. I keep buying and keeping a good stock because you just cannot easily meet the demands of the Nigerian women. We are very fashionable.

    If you were not a business woman, what else would you have loved to be?

    I would have loved to be a permanent house wife! That is because, sometimes when I return from work and I look at the faces of my children, I shake my head and I tell myself the truth that I would love to be with my children more and more. That is why I try to make up to them by being with them all weekends; that is when I stay at home. On Monday to Friday, I get busy with work at the store, but on Saturdays and Sundays, we are always together.

    What is your view of marriage?

    Marriage is an institution (laughs). It is work, but not necessarily hard work, that is because with God on your side, all things will be possible. Marriage, I must let you know, is an institution of its own. To keep a home, a woman must always pray, like it’s said, a prayerless woman is a powerless woman. Keep believing God for everything that you want in your home and always know how to listen, do not talk too much; be vigilant to know what is happening around you. As a woman, you must always be on top of everything in your home.

    For someone like you who travel abroad for work and also go abroad for holiday, how do you differentiate when you are at work from when you are on holiday?

    When I am on holiday, I switch off totally, even switch off the phones and concentrate on my husband and children. At such times, even the people in my store may not be able to reach me because I may not talk to them for a whole week. I focus more on the family during holidays.

    Where can you say that you had the best holiday so far?

    Well, I can say that Atlanta is the place. That is because Atlanta is my husband’s second home. If he is not in Atlanta, then he will be in Nigeria. So I love it when we are holidaying in Atlanta. He feels more at home there and he also takes our children out freely since he knows everywhere there. He is always having time for us in Atlanta. So we love the place. But if we are in another country, he will likely be indoors, sleeping. So for me Atlanta is it.

    Tell us about your spouse, how did you meet, was it love at first sight?

    When I first met him that was in 1987; I met him at a friend’s house. He is a friend to my friend’s uncle. I was passing when he said ‘my wife!’ I turned around and I was like, ‘What is this man saying?’ I didn’t even know him. So, I walked away but later asked my friend about him. She told me that he is her uncle’s friend.

    Three years later, that is 1990, I met him again and he asked me, ‘Do you remember me?’ I replied ‘no’. The next thing he said was, ‘How can a wife not remember her husband?’ That was when I remembered him. So, that was how we met.

    Do you dance?

    Yes, I do. I dance a lot. We are both good dancers. We both love to dance and we dance a lot. We also party a lot too and I go with him to parties most of the time.

    In what ways would you say that women are relevant in today’s society and governance?

    Like the saying goes, ‘behind every successful man, there is a woman’. So I think that now even the politicians know that they cannot do everything by themselves alone. They have come to realise that they need women with them in public administration. It is true that women are more vigilant and diligent. So in today’s politics, we can see that more women are involved. And more and more women are urging and supporting their husbands to get involved.

    Now that you are involved, are you looking at becoming a politician too?

    I love politics, my sister in law is in politics, she won her seat again as a honourable of the House of Representatives, although my father isn’t a politician but a pure business man, but somehow I am involved in politics now. However, to take on the plunge and assume it as a profession is what I do not think that I will do. I think I have enough with my husband being a politician.

    What can you say about the girl-child education? Do you think that girls are getting more educated in our society these days?

    What a man can do, women can do better. Our parents these days realise too that ‘girl-child’ are important in life. Unlike before when it was thought that when you educate a girl child that it can liken to a waste. But these days, it is not so. People now know that the girl child needs to be equally educated. It is now a case of equal gender.

    With your hectic schedule, do you still find time to attend to feminine house duties like cooking?

    I love cooking but I don’t find that much time to cook. So I cook but not as often as I would have loved to because there is no time. But even then, I find time to cook for my children and my husband.

    What are the kinds of food that you love to cook?

    I love to cook beans, it is my favourite. I love to prepare moimoi. No one prepares my moimoi for me. I always have to do that myself. My husband loves to eat egusi and okasi; so I cook those a lot.

    Where did you learn to cook okasi?

    He actually taught me how to cook it. Of course, that means he can cook very well. He loves cooking. He actually cooks for me too. When we are in America, he does all the cooking.

    So what is your style, what kind of clothes do yo love to wear?

    I love our native dresses, I love Iro and Buba. The clothes I wear in a day are determined by my mood. I always want to be free, without any dress or clothing holding me down. That is why my clothing depends on my mood. I wear casuals too when occasion demands it.

    What fashion accessories do you not do without?

    That will be my earrings. I wear them all the time. I can do without all other things, but my earrings and my wedding band, I cannot do without both.

    How do you describe success?

    I believe that success is God; it comes from God, and you cannot be successful in anything without God, even in marriage too. So success really belongs to God. He gives to whomever He pleases. There is no one that can say that he knows all or he is successful because he knows all. It is God that guides all successes.

    How are you coping with personal pressure and challenges?

    In fact, I do not know how I am coping. For instance, I have not slept for five straight hours in the last three days. That is because before the victory party, we had been on the road, travelling from place to place. It’s been hectic but then I thank God for everything. I am always packing my bags into a car and hitting the road. I am now used to it because I have been like this for the past 16 years.

    As a woman, do you think that politics is a dirty game?

    With what I have witnessed from my husband’s experiences, I can say that it is a dirty game. What happened before he fully joined APC with a few other experiences like the shooting incident he encountered during the gubernatorial election here in Osun State recently, I cannot but say that it is a dirty game. Though I was not there when the shooting incident took place, I was at Abuja and had to come to Osun the next day, when I heard about it. That was a frightening incident for me.

    Although I saw him the next day, I knew he must have gone through a lot. And as a wife, I had to advise him to play it a little safer. We thank God for His mercies. In this life, one has to keep listening to wise counsel, his brothers, sisters and other family members and friends too have advised him to also play it a little safer, especially his brothers and sisters, they have always been a pillar of support to him and me as well. They are always there for both of us. They have really been of great support to me; they treat me as their little baby.

    So as the country warms up for a new political dispensation, what do you have to say?

    I pray for the peace of Nigeria, I pray for the success of General Mohammed Buhari, the president-elect. I pray for wisdom and guidance for all the other elected politicians who will soon be in charge of the affairs of the country. I pray that God guides them all.

  • My wife is violent, says husband

    A middle-aged man, Daniel Imeri, has sought the dissolution of his eight-year-old marriage at an Agege Customary Court in Lagos, accusing his wife, Margaret of being self-centered, violent and naughty.

    Mrs Imeri is accusing her husband of beating her, smoking and drinking.

    “There was a day he came home drunk in the middle of the night and messed up everywhere. I was the one who cleaned it afterwards. He said I am naughty but I am not. He beats me for hours on the ground. I don’t love him anymore; I have left his house over a year ago with our children,” she said.

    But, Mr Imeri told the court: “We both take alcoholic drinks and in fact she drinks more than I do. I remember when she was carrying our daughter’s pregnancy, she took stout. I was the one cautioning her to stop it as it could harm the baby.”

    He added: “She once stabbed me in the chest with a scissors. My wife is selfish and self-centered. For two-and-a-half years, she denied me sex. Whenever I requested for sex, she pretends not to be in the mood or to be tired. She lacks human feeling.”

    Imeri denied beating his wife, accusing her of only informing him about their children’s upkeep and school fees without allowing him access to them.

    He said: “She told people I once beat her for three hours in the middle of the night and I keep asking myself if I am that strong to do that. I just want our union dissolved and I also want to see our children when I wish to.”

    The Court’s President, Pa Adekunle Williams, fixed a chamber discussion for the couple after the proceedings.

  • I know my  husband has  crazy female  fans,  but I don’t  really care

    I know my husband has crazy female fans, but I don’t really care

    Behind any successful man is a woman, so goes the common maxim. In reality, the maxim speaks volume about Barrister (Mrs) Caroline Adeneye and her doting husband, Dayo Adeneye, fondly known as D-One. And quite unlike the pack of celebrity marriages that have cracked in recent times and finally broken down irreparably, Caroline’s marriage keeps waxing stronger.

    They quite have different interests. She is a lawyer with background in banking and the CEO of Sierra Global Concept, an integrated event management company. He has a life in entertainment as the co-partner in Prime Time Entertainment. But they remain their own greatest fans. They celebrate each other and the marriage has been blessed with lovely children. In this interview with PAUL UKPABIO, Caroline tells us what binds her family together and all the good and down side of being the wife of a celebrity in these shores.

    HOW do you feel when your husband openly refers to you as his partner?

    I feel very wonderful and I will say there is nothing more than a husband appreciating his wife and openly acknowledging same. What you mean to him and how he perceives you, go a long way. We women don’t actually ask for much. We only ask for the commitment and the assurance from our husbands, that, ‘Look, you mean a lot to me and I love you so much, thank you for tolerating me.’ With that, what else can you ask or wish for? So, I am very happy and I am very privileged to be alive with my whole family. It is a God-given privilege.

    But then, why do you think your husband shows open admiration for you?

    29, 30, 31 CELEB WORLD 21-3-2015.Yes, he openly says that I am a strong force in his life, but I don’t think I am that force really. God is the force behind our union. He is the ultimate force for the career of my husband; I am just the vessel He uses to achieve that great aim in D-One’s life. Of course, I support my husband hundred percent. I support him to achieve anything legitimate that will keep him going strong as the head of our family. I adore him as my head crown and the patriarch of our family. He is my husband and my role as his wife is to support him and give him all it takes for him to manage the pressure of running the home front. I think I am very fulfilled to have been described that way. But ultimately, God is the founding Father of our love life. Our appreciation goes to Him.

    He recently went into politics, did you support his decision and were you not afraid that politics is a dirty game?

    Like I said earlier, I will continue to support my husband in any decision he takes, if it is not to rob or steal. If it is to serve his people and add his knowledge to the development of humanity, why not? Why won’t I support him to work and serve this family as the head of the family? I think I will do well supporting him. When he was going into politics, I was the first person he shared the experience with. He didn’t just go into politics, he was called upon to serve by his people and he was convinced that his presence was needed. Severally, during our campaign activities in Odogbolu, people were treating us like stars. It was like a great homecoming and I couldn’t believe for a second that a people will so much cherish change like that. So, I feel honoured that D-One is my better half. My husband is a loveable personality and that is one thing that has worked for him so far. He is a leader in all ramifications; I am his number one fan and anything I can do to support him, I do.

    And talking about politics being a dirty game, politics is not dirty; it is the attitude that people bring into it that makes it dirty. My husband contested for a position in his constituency and because he respected constituted authority, when he was asked to step down, he did. But he was never dirty about it. He continued to support the party and because of his genuine intention for quality leadership, he was appointed as a member of the Media and Publicity Committee for His Excellency, Governor Ibikunle Amosun. That alone speaks loud of his philosophy. He has been able to define politics and change the perception about how it is being played. Politics is not dirty; it is the attitude that people bring to it, that gives it a negative or positive colour.

    What do you admire about your husband?

    So many things but I will mention three: My husband is focused, calm and very forthright. If you hand a project to my husband, you can rest assured that he will do it within the shortest of time. He is much focused. I have never seen a man like that. And because he is calm, he equally gets on board before everyone else and signs off earlier than every other person. Then, his forthrightness marvels me so much. He is sincere to a fault. These are the qualities I find in him and I think that is the hallmark of his manliness. He is a great man.

    What do you dislike about D-One?

    He is too strict. My husband is too strict; you can’t be lazy and find comfort around him. When he says no, he means it. And when he says yes, he means it. People don’t know this because he keeps a celebrity outlook. Though some people are mistakingly taken in by his celebrity outlook to be just anyhow person, but far from it, my husband is strict and he could just take you to the extreme. He is almost a perfectionist in everything he does. Most times, I am tempted to think that it has to do with his teaching background. He was a teacher way back in the United States for a period of seven years and today, some of his students run big corporations. I think he has a knack for excellence and mediocrity does not sell with him. Maybe because I am the closest to him, and then the children too; so, he expects nothing but excellence from us. He is very strict.

    What lessons has your marriage taught you?

    Our relationship has taught me how to be positive and how to manage people. I am a lawyer by profession and most times, even though I relate with people more than him, I easily get put off if the person does not match my temperament. But my husband was the one who taught me how to see the positive sides of people and maximise that side. My husband believes that for every man, no matter how defaulting he is, there is always a better side that one can explore to his benefit. He is the one who told me that I should always look out for the 30% goodness in any human being and should try to use that 30% to nullify the 70% negative. You know, I told you my husband is very calm, he can tolerate you even for a decade, no matter how bad you turn out to be. He has this excellent spirit of long-term relation. If my husband gets off with you, that could mean that you are a terribly bad person. But even at that, he can tolerate you for a while.

    He is the main assessor when it comes to human relations in our businesses. Secondly, my husband is a happy person by attitude. He is the one who taught me how to make a day positive. He usually tells me that if you wake up in the morning and shout or get angry, then the entire day may be messy for you. But if you wake up with a booming attitude or a happy attitude, the entire day will turn up happy for you. He strongly believes that everyday is amazing and on that note, you can make the week amazing; you can make the month amazing; you can make the year amazing and even you can just make an entire decade amazing. That is him for you.

    Which of your children is taking after him?

    Maybe my first daughter, Nicole; she is science-inclined, but she is the social prefect in their school and she is always the one organising any entertainment event there. She is talented when it comes to entertainment, but she is likely to study medicine. She is also a good photographer but, we are in a world where a hobby can go for business, while one’s discipline is saved for another day. My son, Bryan, is equally interesting; there was a day he recorded some raps and when his dad came, he gave it to him and the man was just laughing. He laughed and laughed his jaw off because he was surprised.

    But knowing the kind of father they have, they are all serious with their studies and even if you want to be in entertainment, you must study first. Study makes perfect and talent without education could be violent. My last child, Ashley, is a lovely dancer but she asks a lot of questions. She is very young but, she has it going for her. So, I think all of them took a trait off their father’s profession. I am proud of them. And at times I come home and they will just say ‘mummy, listen to this new song’ and I will say, ‘where did you get it from?’ And they will say, ‘Ah, mom you are not in town.’ and I will say, ‘I am in town but I and daddy are looking for money to pay your school fees and take care of you.’ And we will laugh it off. So, there is prospect that these kids have a lot in common with their father, but they are still young to take independent decisions.

    So, how do you handle the fact that he is more popular?

    Yes, I am more on the quiet side socially. You will never know this but I can tell you that in terms of attitude, he is quieter than me. Surprisingly, I make friends more easily than my husband. He is shy and reserved. But most people don’t know this; they often look at the showbiz side of my husband. Unfortunately, that is his job and not his personality.

    He once told us that you are the one that really celebrates his birthday annually.

    Yes, for the yearly birthday gigs in his honour, I have to do that because he is my crown. The Bible says, ‘our husbands are the crowns that adorn our heads.’ I celebrate my crown because he is the head of my family. It is not that he doesn’t celebrate me as well, but because he is more on the public side, if I send out 10 invitations for a party in his honour, I see 100 people turning up. There was a year we had a peculiar experience. It rained heavily and the weather was not too friendly. We set up the event for 2pm and the rain and knocked everything down and we thought the event was over because of the kind of weather we had. But at 4pm when the rain stopped, I couldn’t believe the number of people who came in between 4pm and 6pm. The human traffic was heavy. It was on a Sunday; you won’t believe that as at 1am, I had to turn off the music and I said, ‘Look, you are all going to work tomorrow’ and they said, ‘No, we love D-One, we appreciate him and we are not in a hurry to stop the party.’ For us, we see it as a way of life and we equally appreciate people who share our success with us.

    How do you handle his absence due to his nature of work?

    I think he is in a better position to answer that question. I think the good thing that happened to me was that I married Dayo Adeneye. I didn’t marry D-One. So, we are like normal couples. D-One is the showbiz personality everyone sees and craves for, while Dayo Adeneye is my husband and father of my children. We go through what normal couples go through and we get over things together. Yes, as a family, we have more of his absence than his presence. It is a bit better now. I remember when I was having kids, he was not always there. You will discover there is eight years gap between Nicole and Bryan, the first and second child.

    Those days when I went to the hospital, my doctor will say, ‘I don’t know why you are coming here because your husband is never around.’ The man will say, ‘The day you start travelling with your husband, you can come back to see me. Stop coming to give me your money; I am not interested in your money.’ That was what my doctor told me and true to his word, it was when I travelled with him D-One, that I got pregnant with Bryan because he was never there. He was always travelling to cover one event or the other across the world. So, I went with him on that particular trip because the doctor said if I don’t go, I should not come back to him; that I should not say I am not pregnant when my husband is not always there.

    That is that; I think in all these years of knowing Dayo, I think I can count how many times we have celebrated Valentine’s Day together. So, maybe that is why when our birthday comes, he tries to celebrate it for me in a modest way. Then, I celebrate him annually because most times, he is not always around.

    Your husband is a ladies’ man, how do you handle women around him? Do you feel bad when you hear tales about women dying to have him since he is a celebrity?

    No. There is one thing I have to appreciate my husband for; I have to give kudos to him for one thing, he respects me and he would not go out of his way to do anything he knows a wife won’t like to see. But you can also understand that female fans are crazy; they go all around him and all that, but when we go for public events and they do their stuff to him, I don’t really care because he is going home with me. That is the most important thing.

    Have you ever checked his phone and stumbled on some crazy text?

    I don’t think there is, because my husband knows I don’t have the time. I don’t check his phone. Why should I desire to give myself unnecessary headache? You check today, you see a female name; tomorrow you see another female name. It is unnecessary; a man who loves you will do everything necessary to protect his home and like I said, I give kudos to my husband; he tries to make me happy. He tries to avoid things that will make me unhappy. So, what else would I ask for? Snooping around? That means I am not busy.

    What are the benefits of being D-One’s wife?

    Yes, the goodwill my husband has from the public rubs off on me on many occasions. I really appreciate it because I feel very great. I feel wonderful and I feel blessed to be Mrs Caroline Adeneye because anywhere I go, people favour me. Though I try to hide my identity but perhaps by chance, someone who has seen my face in one magazine or the other is quick to ask, when I say Caroline Adeneye, ‘Oh, are you D-One’s wife?’ So why didn’t you let us know earlier? ‘Don’t you know D-One is our Egbon?’ And before I know it, they will pull me out of the line and give me an express attention; what else can someone ask for? So, his good name opens doors for me and I pray God will continue to prosper him and make him fulfill his dreams in life.

    As a lawyer, you also run Sierra Global Concept, a leading event management company, is your husband not jealous that you could be richer than him?

    Dayo allows me to grow; he allows me to expand; he allows me to do whatever makes me happy. If I say I want to do this, he will tell me the way to go about it and all that. So what else can I ask for in a man? A man who allows his wife to grow, like he tells me, ‘I don’t care if you are richer than me, all that matters is that you are still my wife; so, why would I be bothered? Because whatever money you make belongs to the family and what is life about? Life is too short; our biggest priority is to live as one in truth and with sincerity of purpose.’ And his prayer is that God should give me good health to enjoy the benefit of my labour. That has always been my husband’s wish for me. He is a much secured man without fear for his wife’s success.

    Why do you think your marriage has lasted these 18 years?

    The secret of a successful marriage life rests in three things; they are patience, patience and patience. Those are the three things you need to secure your marriage. My mum told me this when I was getting married. My parents had reservations for showbiz people. They believed they don’t keep good wives; they don’t keep good homes and all that. I insisted that it was Dayo I wanted, but they refused to honour our proposal for two years and I had to have my baby before our marriage. My daughter was almost two years when we had our marriage because there was resistance from my parents. But when they finally succumbed and gave their blessing. My mum said to me, ‘My daughter, you have to wear a garment of patience because we that are not even married to people in the public arena, we romance patience, not to talk of people like you who are marrying stars. So, patience and friendship matters. When you are friends, you build trust and trust becomes the tripod on which patience will stand and with patience, you will be able to do anything.

    Secondly, you must be able to communicate; it is a very powerful weapon for a successful marriage. But I equally found out that in Africa, majority of the men are not too open for communication. They think you want to know so much. But I will tell you that whatever your husband feels you should know, just accept it. Later, he will start opening up to you. Don’t force him because Africa is a man’s world, it is the West that harbours the opinion that women are strong. If you want to succeed in your marriage here, you must be very humble and understand how it works here.

    You must put upon yourself a permanent garment of peace so that your marriage can earn a silver jubilee, a golden jubilee and if possible a diamond jubilee. Patience is the key word and that is what I tell women of nowadays; don’t even believe what you see in the film or read in the novel. The one in the film is film trick and the one in the novel is fiction. Reality is different from film trick or fiction. The man you live your entire life with is not only your father but your teacher and chief instructor.

    Tell us about your style?

    My style is ageless. Style, for me, is timeless but I won’t kill myself to fit into the bandwagon. I can wear anything that sits well on me and the mood of the occasion comes into reference once in a while. To me, style should be timeless not seasonal. I am not a rave-of-the-moment kind of person. I wear what soothes my mood for the best reason known to me and to the appreciation of fans and enthusiasts.

    What are your best fashion accessories?

    My shoes (laughs)! I am not an Imelda Marcos but I like shoes. My shoes speak well for me and I will only need to invite you to my shoe rack for you to judge better.

    What dress won’t you be caught with in public?

    Maybe bum pants. I used to wear that when I was much younger but today, you can’t find me putting on a bum pant either at home or elsewhere. As an African woman, one must protect the sanctity of one’s womanhood. That is me.

    You have a role model?

    None!

    What about books?

    My husband encourages me to read positive power books and I have several of such books that I cannot remember the name of my favourite author now but I think I like the book, Everyday is a Friday by Joel Austin. You know, people are always ecstatic when it is Friday, but the author said, ‘Hey, why not make everyday your own Friday? Because in the real sense, you never can tell which one will be your last day on earth. You may never even see the next Friday. So, make every day your Friday.’  I also read the book Power and Secrets by Ronda Bryne. These books have changed so many things about me. It has given me more energy to be sincerely happy with myself, even in the lowest of moments.