Tag: love

  • HEARTS…a story of love, heartbreak and life [PART TWO]

    HEARTS…a story of love, heartbreak and life [PART TWO]

    In pretence, he would gloat with his shoulders raised high in the presence of his goons. However, deep within him was the ensnared little man in manacles and chains of addictions; crying for help. The heaps of adulations from his friends were millstones and burdens weighing heavy on his soul. He felt lost, empty, finished and dry.

    Fast forward into the seminar hall where she is conveniently seated with other participants and of course, the charmer – “Mr Femi”.

    Femi, on the other hand just could not help himself because the innocent-looking, gregarious, and adorable Amarachi had caught his fancy. His mind was so busy with thoughts and plots to win her heart that he unconsciously voiced the words – “I must get her!”. The person seated next to him quickly turned to Femi’s direction and shook is head…he must have muttered – “i am so sorry for you”. Femi quickly comported himself and at least pretended to be listening to the facilitator.

    Read also: HEARTS…a story of love, heartbreak and life [PART ONE]

    Now Femi hasn’t always been a serial womaniser, in fact, he was a well brought up and cultured young man from a well-to-do family. He was an only son amongst three female siblings who were always in the boarding school. His early childhood was not so different from an average child that lives in Lagos. He played on the streets under the sun and in the rain, enjoyed comic books and videos games, displayed some caricature Jackie Chan moves after watching one of the classic movies, and hated to have his bath twice daily; he did what boys his age would normally do.

    However, his days of innocence were coming to an end rather too early at the age of 11 when his entrepreneur dad and banker mom decided to employ Edidiong as a house help. As part of her chores, she was responsible for tending to Femi – from feeding, bathing, down to bringing him from school daily. Femi hardly saw his parents even on weekends. They are usually out of the house before he’s astir in the morning and arrived very late at night when he’s already asleep. He’s always in the company and tutelage of the housemaid who cared less about him, save for her monthly emolument.

    One very unfortunate day, the unexpected happened to Femi. “Femi come here”, Edidiong said with her airy-low voice. She took him to her room, turned the key twice in a clockwise direction to lock the door, and closed the window blinds.

    Read also: HEARTS…a story of love, heartbreak and life [CONCLUDING PART]

    Femi stood transfixed in the centre of the room not having the slightest idea or premonition of what was about to go down. Aunty Edidiong, he said. What are you doing? Why are you locking the door and windows? She walked slowly towards him, drew him close to herself and said “let me show you something!” That was the beginning of the end of the affable and morally cultured Femi. She abused him sexually and threatened to take his life should he report the incident to anyone, especially his parents.

    Edidiong stayed with his family as their housemaid for another seven years. These years were a gestation period into sexual addiction and inordinate foray for Femi. His mind and body had been re-engineered, reconditioned and tampered with by the housemaid so much so that his profligacy and womanising tendencies had reached astronomical proportions before he was 18 years old.

    Now Femi is 29, every night he reminisces about his life – the scores of relationships he had been in, the hearts he had broken and other “touching” stories better left untold. He sheds tears sometimes because he knows that he could be a better man and live a better life instead of the bestial adventure that reeks from his being.

    Femi is the happening guy, the man of the moment, the ladies man, the “oshomo one” of Nigeria etc. These are some of the alias and praise names his friends would usually heap upon him. In pretence, he would gloat with his shoulders raised high in the presence of his cohorts. However, deep within him was the ensnared little man in manacles and chains of addictions; crying for help. The heaps of adulations from his friends were literally millstones and burdens weighing heavy on his soul. He felt lost, empty, finished, and dry.

    Now the program was over and Amarachi had packed her seminar materials and was heading for the bus stop when Femi quickly drove his Mercedes-Benz C-Class beside her, wind down his side window and offered to give her a lift. Please milady, can i give you a ride?

    Watch out for the concluding part…

    By Moses Emorinken

    Email: brandphase@yahoo.com

    Twitter: @memorinken

    Instagram: @memorinken

  • HEARTS…a story of love, heartbreak and life [PART ONE]

    HEARTS…a story of love, heartbreak and life [PART ONE]

    With her head pressed tightly against her pillow, shedding warm tears that literally deluged her pillow, she cried all night, engaged in a pity party; asking God why her parents would call it quits – a once blissful marriage. She now feels a void, one that needs to be filled urgently before she loses her mind; she feels empty, finished and dry.

    First, it was an introduction; a seemingly harmless remark of “how are you?…my name is Femi!”. In response, she gives a restrained and innocuous smile out of courtesy, and tries to add the formal appellation of “Mr…” before returning the pleasantry. But quickly, like a predator that stealthily and hastily latches onto its unsuspecting prey, he interrupts and says – “please simply call me Femi.” She holds back her smile again and said…“ok then, Femi…it’s nice meeting you!”

    The breakout session was over, and everyone was required to congregate back as an audience and maintain their sitting arrangement. She politely excused herself and went to have a seat. From the corner of her eye she could see Femi…sorry, Mr Femi, staring at her; his head tilted almost permanently towards her direction.

    Read also: HEARTS…a story of love, heartbreak and life [PART TWO]

    Femi was seated four seats before her (on the same row). She could hardly concentrate on the topic being discussed by the facilitator; all she could think about was how brazenly smart and articulate he was during her first encounter with him. Femi is the quintessential ladies’ dream-guy; he had the built (tall and sturdy) that most ladies delight in, skin tone that resonates between fair and chocolate, a baritone voice that literally reverberates and echoes in the receptacles your subconscious minutes after he has spoken, a clean low-cut with a well-trimmed goatee.

    Taking a cursory dive into a “not too distant past” of Amarachi (yes, that’s her name), say a year ago, you would see her pressing her head tightly against her pillow, shedding warm tears that literally deluged her pillow. She cried all night, and engaged in a pity party; asking God why her parents would call it quits – a once blissful marriage.

    Read also: HEARTS…a story of love, heartbreak and life [CONCLUDING PART]

    She just turned twenty one, and was returning home after the completion of her one-year compulsory National Youth Service Corps (N.Y.S.C) program to her fatherland. Her steps were literally prancing, springing and pouncing as she drew close to her family house; in fact, she was barely six feet away from the gate when she raced into the house hoping to receive an overwhelming shower of love and warm embrace from her dad and mom; she is an only child.

    Her infantile excitement quickly turned sour and sore as she beheld an abusive scene of her father bludgeoning and pummeling down on her mom; his big fist tightly clenched and dashing out unrestrained blows on her. She quickly rushed to separate the duo before her father gives a KO (Knockout).

    He had a brutal and bestial deportment and demeanour; a side of him she had never seen before. Her mother laid on the tiled floor drenched in tears, sweat, and something that looked like blood…Oh no…it was her blood. The situation was critical, but thanks to the swift response from the state ambulance service unit, her mom was rushed to the hospital and was operated on quickly. After two weeks she was out of the hospital.

    Ever since that unfortunate incident, her once congenial and loving family had morphed into a house of commotion…heck!, a house of conundrum and confusion. Every day in the house was like a typical sad and depressing scenery from a classic tragedy movie…an unending saga of bitter and tempestuous relationship between her parents.

    The last straw that broke the camel’s back was when her mother filed for a divorce, and her dad in his usual egoistic machismo bragged about his foray into adultery and how he regrets ever laying eyes on his wife.

    Now they are divorced. Amarachi shuttles incommodiously between her mother’s newly rented apartment and her father’s house. She lays flat on the bed, her eyes looking up at the ceiling; her thoughts receding to the good times they once had as a family; like a transient smoke that quickly disappears into thin air, those times have become nothing more than empty memories…forever buried in the annals of history…her history!

    With her head pressing tightly against her pillow, shedding warm tears that literally deluged her pillow, she cried all night, and engaged in a pity party; asking God why her parents would call it quits – a once blissful marriage. She now feels a void, one that needs to be filled urgently before she loses her mind; she feels empty, finished, and dry.

    Fast forward into the seminar hall where she is conveniently seated with other participants, and of course, the charmer – “Mr Femi”.

    To be continued!

    By Moses Emorinken

    Email: brandphase@yahoo.com

    Twitter: @memorinken

    Instagram: @memorinken

  • Love-us-or-buzz-off mentality

    The presidency is a heady place. No, let’s retake that. Let’s say the presidency is another country or a giddying entity. And by this we do not mean Aso Rock per se, but any residence of power the world over. Unless you are a president in your own right (by this we mean a sovereign president and not any other contraption of that nomenclature, please), you are bound to be subdued, circumscribed or get big-headed.

    In some circles, it is called the aura of power; that magical, illogical power of power. It is of course buoyed by the very supposition that within this precinct, nothing is impossible; or rather, everything is possible. Herein lies the power of life, the power of death, the power of wealth; immense wealth. Indeed, every other power at all you might seek can be sourced here if you are rooted enough and know the buttons to press.

    Should you perchance have a stake or operate from within the presidential coven, you are immediately ensconced unto the realm of gods – and mind you, you don’t have any say in this. It happens in spite of your better self. Now begins the problem: it all now depends on your capacity to carry your newly acquired godhead. Again, mind you, it is a heavy load only the humble and gracious can carry.

    This happens even to the very best of us – when your fathers, mothers, teacher and hitherto superiors begin to genuflect superfluously before you then you are bound to begin to think that you have morphed into a god except that you still find yourself using the small room.

    Well, Hardball is actually interrogating a statement attributed to the Senior Special Assistant to the President on Media and Publicity, Mr. Garba Shehu who said in Abuja last week that the critics of President Mohammadu Buhari were favour seekers.

    Hear him: “As for those critics who are used to being settled by successive governments, with false claims to being so-called conscience of society popping up from the cupboard on and off to drive the country towards religious and ethnic polarization, they have no other motive but to rock the boat of good governance.

    “What they yearn for is to be picked out to be paid to keep quiet. The Buhari government has abolished ‘settlement’.

    First, this remark from a presidential spokesman and an erstwhile senior media man is unfortunate, ill-tempered and in bad taste. It is settled that every government needs a robust regime of critics. To therefore blackmail such critics as seeking to be ‘bribed’ is low and may well be self-indicting as Shehu himself was a strident critic.

    Finally, examples abound showing that President Muhammadu Buhari has been less than inclusive in his policies. This point must be made.

  • Three Signs You’re in a Bad Relationship

    Three Signs You’re in a Bad Relationship

    One of the most difficult things to admit is that a relationship that started out great and with so much promise has turned into something bad. When we enter a relationship, we’re wearing rose-colored glasses, focusing on all our partner’s good qualities and ignoring their faults.

    That’s why our family and friends are better at predicting the outcome of our relationships than we are! Here are three signs that it might be time to end your relationship.

    1) You don’t have personal freedom

    Relationships are not about controlling another person, they are about giving complete freedom and seeing that each other’s decisions are aligned. Every person has unique needs and the best relationships are ones in which partners fulfil each other’s most important needs.

    If you find your partner is controlling how you spend money, who you hang out with, how you dress, or any other decisions, take it as a big red flag. People who control their partners are insecure about their ability to meet their needs.

    They fear that freedom will help their partner realize that life is better without the relationship. A secure partner is confident in their ability to meet the other’s needs; they know that if their partner leaves them for someone else, the relationship wasn’t meant to be. This news might be tough to take at first, but in the end, there’s a better match out there and the relationship’s ending opens the door for a more fulfilling union.

    2) Your 80/20 ratio is off

    One of the most well-known couples researchers, John Gottman, is able to predict divorce with 90% accuracy. How does he do it? By watching partners communicate with each other, and coding their ratio of positive to negative exchanges.

    Couples should have at least 80% positive interactions. The other 20%, according to Gottman, may never get resolved. The arguments that are present at the start of a relationship are going to remain salient all the way through. Instead of focusing on those sources of conflict, the goal is to enhance the 80%. Work on making the relationship as positive as possible and let the rest go.

    If you find yourself in a relationship with a ratio slanted towards the negative, it may not be the healthiest. Try to make things work for a period of time, but recognize that expecting a partner to change is not the wisest strategy. It might be time to move on.

    3) You wish you were home alone

    You’re in a bad relationship when you find yourself wishing, too often, that your partner were not around. You start to realize that life would be easier and happier without them. When you’re in each other’s presence, things are tense, arguments ensue, and you feel unhappy.

    Waking up each morning is dreadful because they’re still there. Don’t stay in a relationship because you think you won’t find anyone better. Being on your own is better! It takes courage to admit that a relationship has turned sour but you’d be surprised at how strong and happy you can be on your own.

    Life is too short to waste time on someone who is not good for you. Your well-being is intricately connected to your partner; when the relationship is great, you’re great! But when it’s not going well, it adversely affects you in a big way. Every relationship experiences tough times and it’s worth working on issues to see if it will improve.  But when your happiness and well-being are affected for years or your partner is not helping to make things better (despite repeated requests!), it may be time to go.

    Culled from Psychology Today

  • How to keep your man

    How to keep your man

    Men want love as badly as women do. Most especially Lagos men. They just might not always be as obvious about it. But generally, they want the same thing: friendship, companionship, chemistry. So why is there so much confusion and miscommunication between the sexes?

    Rules. Some have been handed down through the generations. Others are ones we “see” to be true. And, of course, there are the ones written from our personal history.

    There are some universal rules applying to men that you probably could find inscribed on the walls of caves from long ago. They still ring true today:

    Praise Him

     Just like ladies, Men also adore women who shower them with adulation.

    Quit Nagging

    Men hate it. Tell them once what you want. You have a 50-50 chance it will be done. Tell them more than that within a 24-hour period and it’s called nagging. Lagos men have little chill, therefore be careful and avoid nagging.

    Crying

    Men really hate it. Imagine you finally get him to have a serious talk and you start crying because you don’t like how it’s going. Well, girlfriend, you killed that one. If he ignores your emotions, Finish the talk, and then cry to the dog or whoever.

    Where is this relationship going?

    Really? Fine, you have to know what plan he has for the relationship but you don’t have to ask this too early. You don’t have to rush things. You just have to let is flow.

    Food

    Feed him! I suppose the cliché rings true. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. They find that women who cook are more sexy and confident than women who do not. Gone are the days of takeout menus. As a man ages, so does his palate. Nothing pleases a man more than a hearty home cooked meal made by the love of his life.

    Be Naughty

    Try not to let your sex life become lackluster. Ask him about his ultimate sexual fantasy and play it out. Turn up the fun by turning up the kink. Do something spontaneous like surprising him with sex. Psst. It’s good for both of you. It keeps the connection and relieves stress and tension. He’ll be putty in your hands. Cook a meal for him after and he’ll be so happy he might even cry.

    Be supportive

    You should stand by your man through thick and thin, especially when it comes to difficult life decisions. Support him in his decision. No matter how unpleasant it may be, your partner needs your support to help him through the tough times so ensure that you are there for him.

    Show Appreciation

    It doesn’t matter how little the effort is, make sure you show appreciation often

     Love

    And more love. Tell him. Hug him. Text him. Laugh with him. Leave love notes in the bathroom or in his car. All the time. You’ll get it back in spades. It’s contagious and it keeps the special spark glowing bright.

    However Nigerian Youtuber Adefolake reveal ways to keep a man in Lagos. See video below:

    [jwplayer cYTC5rdw]

     

     

  • Governors preach love, peace at independence

    Governors across the country yesterday felicitated with the citizenry on the nation’s 57 independence anniversary with messages urging unity, peaceful co-existence, hope, patience, religious tolerance and love.

    Ambode: we must remain united

     In his message, Lagos State Governor Akinwunmi Ambode emphasised the need for Nigeria to remain united, saying there was more to gain in being together as one nation than dissolving as different independent entities.

    He spoke yesterday at a special thanksgiving service to commemorate the anniversary at Lagos House Chapel in Alausa, Ikeja.

    The governor said it was important for Nigerians to realise the fact that the country’s diversity is a strength in itself, which makes the country a truly special place.

    He said a moment of reflection and retrospection would reveal the need for Nigerians to be thankful to God for His grace, blessings and mercy over the country.

    Ambode said: “That we still have a country we can call Nigeria today is a proof of the divine hands of God in our being together as one.

    “We must, therefore, reflect on our journey so far and come to the inevitable realisation that we have much more to gain as one nation than as different independent entities.

    Ahmed: Nigeria is poised for greatness

    Kwara State Governor Abdulfatah Ahmed called on Nigerians to work for and believe in Nigeria’s unity and peaceful coexistence as means for attaining and sustaining growth.

    The governor, who congratulated Nigerians, said with the efforts of the Federal Government at economic recovery, the nation is poised for greatness.

    We must protect our unity, says Amosun

    Ogun Governor Ibikunle Amosun declared that Nigeria still has a “huge potential to flourish and be great again”.

    But, he called for eternal vigilance to safeguard the country from “ethnic jingoists and religious fundamentalists” working to dismember it.

    Amosun said the continued unity of Nigeria is germane to the realisation of its full strength and called on well-meaning Nigerians to lend their “voices and ideas to the cause of Nigeria’s unity by drowning out the voices of the few divisive elements whose stock-in-trade is belligerent posturing.”

    Ayade preaches hope, patience

    Cross River State Governor Ben Ayade enjoined Cross Riverians and Nigerians to be patient and hopeful. According to Ayade, the country would surely surmount its challenges.

    The governor noted that despite the myriads of challenges that have confronted Nigeria in recent times, the country has, however, made some giant strides in its march towards greatness .

    Ayade said with the kind of leadership, as presently headed by President Muhammadu Buhari, the country would definitely bounce back to reclaim its status as a true giant of Africa.

    The governor used the occasion to reiterate the commitment of his administration to deliver on all his campaign promises to the people.

    Let’s appreciate our diversities, says Bello

    Niger State Governor Abubakar Sani Bello said after 57 years of being independent, the nation needs to start appreciating its diversities and work towards one united entity.

    He stated this in a state broadcast to mark the anniversary in Minna.

    According to the governor, he said the time has come to fire up the spirit of patriotism that propelled the founding fathers in their quest to build a united, indivisible and prosperous nation.

    Ganduje cautions against hate speech

    Kano State Governor Abdullahi Umar Ganduje, during activities to mark event at Sani Abacha Stadium, Kano yesterday, cautioned against hate speeches. He insisted that the unity of the country is sacrosanct.

    He condemned violent agitations and hate speeches, masterminded by some few disgruntled elements for selfish reasons, which results  in unnecessary carnage, coupled with loss of lives.

    The governor, therefore, cautioned against such unpatriotic conduct and reminded Nigerians to remember the immense sacrifices made by the country’s founding fore-fathers to ensure Nigeria’s stability and unity.

    Kogi governor to       youth: demonstrate competence

    Kogi State Governor Yahaya Bello called on the youth to take the gauntlet by proving that they are capable in the different leadership roles that might be entrusted upon them.

    The governor, during a statewide address to mark the anniversary yesterday, urged Nigerians to continue to focus on those things that unite them and to shun tribalism or ethnicity.

    He enjoined Kogi workers to partner with the administration and be ready to make sacrifices for the greater good of the state.

    Obaseki urges peaceful co-existence

    Edo State Governor Godwin Obaseki congratulated the citizenry with a call on them to co-exist peacefully.

    Obaseki said the joy of being independent people cannot be qualified as it brings limitless freedom and a high sense of self-worth.

    He urged Edo people and Nigerians in general to remain broad-minded, accommodating and living with one another peacefully, irrespective of their diversity.

    Nigerians have every reason to celebrate, says Wike

    To Rivers State Governor Nyesom Wike, after 57 years, “Nigerians have every reason to celebrate this day because independence was the culmination of the dreams and struggles of our founding fathers for us to forever be in complete control of our affairs as a free, unfettered people”.

    Wike said: “These are extraordinary times for our country made worse by our failure to successfully redefine and restructure the country towards a progressive path since independence. We know that the ashes from the old fires that threatened the stability of our country continue to smoulder unabated.

    “We must, therefore, all unite behind the national flag by setting aside the narrative of division, violence and hate and replace them with the narrative of peace and unity as aptly captured by our founding fathers on our coat of arms, be proud of our diversity and build a fairer and just nation for the present and future generations.”

    Akeredolu seeks prosperous nation

    Ondo State Governor Oluwarotimi Akeredolu (SAN) stressed the need for the people to cast aside divisive tendencies with the sole aim of building a nation with shared destiny.

    Akeredolu spoke during a special thanksgiving service organised by the state Christians Association of Nigeria (CAN) to mark the anniversary at the Saint David’s Anglican Church, Ijomu, Akure.

    He asked Nigerians to shun pervasive sentiment to enable the country to achieve its desirous meaningful growth.

    Ugwuanyi promises more projects

    Enugu State Governor Ifeanyi Ugwuanyi reassured his people of a visible increase in essential infrastructure across the state “now that the rain is fast receding”.

    He said more contractors would return to old sites and work would commence on new sites.

    Ugwuanyi spoke at the holy mass/march past held at the Michael Okpara Square, Enugu to commemorate the independence anniversary celebration.

     Nigeria’ll implode without restructuring, says Dickson

    Bayelsa State Governor Seriake Dickson yesterday warned that without restructuring, agitations against injustices and imbalances were capable of driving the country to the point of implosion.

    Dickson, therefore, described persons and groups calling for the change in the present structure of the country as the true patriots.

    The governor insisted that without sitting down to re-examine the present structure, the country would continue to deal with eruptions of agitations from different ethnic nationalities.

    Dickson spoke after a special prayer and thanksgiving to mark the independence anniversary and 21st birthday of Bayelsa at the King of Glory Chapel, Government House, Yenagoa.

  • Abdulsalami, Tambuwal, Mark, others canvass unity, love

    Abdulsalami, Tambuwal, Mark, others canvass unity, love

    EMINENT Nigerians, including former Head of State General Abdulsalami Abubakar, Sokoto State Governor Aminu Tambuwal and former Senate President David Mark have emphasised that the country’s peace, unity and security must not be compromised.

    The former Head of State,  Tambuwal , Mark, Chief of Defence Staff (CDS),  General Gabriel  Olonisakin, Chief of Army Staff (COAS) , General Tukur Bruratai and  former COAS , General Alwali Kazir, at the weekend  in Kaduna, said every strategic step must be taken to protect and preserve Nigeria’s corporate entity.

    A statement by the Media Assistant to Mark, Paul Mumeh, said the leaders spoke separately at the 50th anniversary of Nigerian Defence Academy (NDA ) 3rd Regular Course of 1967.

    It said General Abubakar, who was the special guest of honour at the golden jubilee dinner, told the military officers that in or out of office, they must make the security, unity and peace of Nigeria the cornerstone of their endeavours.

    The former head of state was quoted to have said the country has made enough sacrifice in the past to keep the nation one.

    He said: “Whatever needs to be done to ensure peace, good neighbourliness, unity, equity and justice to all must be done.”

    Mark noted their conviction on entering into the military institution in September 1967 as including patriotism to defend and protect the territorial integrity of Nigeria.

    That conviction, Mark stated, still binds them even after their retirement.

    Tambuwal, the statement said, expressed appreciation to members of the armed forces for their war against insurgents, especially in the Northeast.

    He urged them to remain steadfast and a shining example of patriotism and unity in diversity.

    General Olonisakin thanked the retired officers for making their professional experiences available to the younger generation in the noble task of safeguarding the nation’s territorial integrity and in responding to contemporary threats to national security .

  • ‘I caught my wife, driver making love’

    ‘I caught my wife, driver making love’

    A businessman, Moses Ojiekomhan, on Tuesday told Ebute-Meta Chief Magistrates’ Court, that he caught his wife, Joy with his driver Emeka Osuh,  making love at their Lagos home.

    Ojiekomhan, the Managing Director of Legend Logistics and Integrated Concept Limited, Ikeja, stated this during her (Joy) arraignment on a two count-charge of conspiracy and stealing.

    Joy pleaded not guilty.

    The mother of two, through her counsel Mr J. Uwabuche, accused Ojiekomhan of abducting their 18-month-old baby.

    According to the police, in a charge marked G38/2017, last June 30 at about 11:30am, Joy,  37, conspired with Osuh, who is now at large, to steal N1,136,400 belonging to Legend Logistics and Integrated Concept.

    According to prosecuting counsel, Mr. E. I. Onine, the alleged offences are contrary to and punishable under sections 411 and 287 of the Criminal Law of Lagos State, 2015.

    Uwabuche, who urged the court to admit Joy to bail on liberal terms, said the matter was between husband and wife, and that reconciliation was ongoing between both of their families.

    This was not opposed by Onine.

    But before writing her bench ruling, Chief Magistrate Helen Omisore turned to Ojiekomhan and sought confirmation of the duo’s relationship.

    Ojiekomhan replied: “We once lived together as husband and wife but we are now separated. They have charged me to court for child abduction.

    “I caught Emeka, who is a driver in my company, sleeping with her in my house.”

    The prosecutor added that police investigation found that the two were once husband and wife, but separated after Ojiekomhan found Joy and Osuh in his bed.

    Uwabuche, however, pointed out that Ojiekomhan took away their 18-month-old baby from the defendant.

    “An Ogba Chief Magistrates’ Court, in Court 4, has even issued a warrant of arrest against him,” the defence counsel said.defence counsel said.defence counsel said.

    He stated that Joy’s arraignment was a ploy by the police to prevent her from appearing in court today to testify as a witness on the child abduction charge against him.

    Following the conflicting claims, Magistrate Omisore called for the case file, examined it, and ruled on the defendant’s bail.

    She said: “The defendant is hereby granted bail in the sum of N500, 000, with two sureties in the like sum. One of the sureties must be a blood relation to the defendant, have three years tax certificate payable to the Lagos State government. Both the home and office addresses of the sureties must be verified by the prosecutor.”
    The case continues on September 27.

  • SIMI: ‘I’M A  LOYAL  LOVER’

    SIMI: ‘I’M A LOYAL LOVER’

    Meeting her for the first time, you will agree that X3M Music artiste, Simisola Bolatito Ogunleye, better known as Simi, comes across as opinionated. In this interview with CHIDINMA ONOZIE, she talks about love, life, relationships as well as her self-titled sophomore studio album, ‘Simisola’. 

    IS this your debut or your sophomore album?

    It’s my sophomore album. I had a gospel album in 2008. At the time, it did what it could do at that time. It was definitely not as big as this one, but I wasn’t as big as I am now though.

    Why did you switch to secular music?

    I just wanted to do more with my music. I wanted to be an all-round artist

    Will you say you are fulfilled now?

    I’ve always been fulfilled. I was fulfilled when I did gospel music so I wouldn’t say I feel more fulfilled or less fulfilled today.

    Looking at the album so far, what can you say about the reception?

    I’m extremely blown away because I know when I put out the track list and it had only one feature, a lot of people were skeptical about it. They doubted whether it was going to be a good enough album. I was a bit nervous, but at the same time I wasn’t. The reception has been amazing. We are topping the charts and we are really excited about that.

    Does it mean that the success of an album depends on how many people you feature?

    A lot of people think that. For example Jay Cole is a rapper who went platinum twice without featuring anyone, meaning it’s a big deal to do that by yourself. That means a lot of people attach major importance to features when it comes to the success of an album. A lot of people tend to think that.

    Don’t you think you are shooting yourself in the foot by just featuring one person in your album?

    I don’t think so because some of the biggest songs I’ve actually done are the ones I featured artistes. I don’t have any problem doing features. For this album, my plan was not to have any features. There were things I wanted to do but they did not work out. I expect the lifespan of my music to go on for a while. This is not the end of my career, so because I did not do features on this one does not mean I won’t do features on the other album.

    So you featuring Adekunle Gold, is it a sort of pay back for the work he did on the album?

    No that’s ridiculous. It’s an incredible coincidence, buts it’s not a pay back. I wrote a song, Take Me Back, four years ago and we decided we’re going to do the song. That was before he dropped his album, and it turned out that at that time the song was compiled, the only song that had a feature with him on it. There is no scheme.

    Did you write all the songs yourself?

    Yes, apart from Adekunle’s verse in the song and in Aimasiko, the song was like a mix of the original.

    How did you feel about Adekunle using your name to sing?

    It’s very flattering. My two favourite Adekunle Gold songs are Sade and Orente.

    So what’s going on in your personal life?

    Well the things I would like to keep close about are my personal life. Because like I always say, when you’re doing music or you’re acting, you’re in the entertainment department, your life becomes entertainment. So you keep it to yourself.

    Are you in a relationship?

    One thing that I like to keep very close to me is my personal life, not just my relationships. But yes, I’m in a relationship. I’ve never denied that, but I just won’t say with whom.

    At that point you wanted to put out your album, was there no fear that this album will not make it at all?

    Anything is possible. You know, it’s not possible for anybody to like everything. Even the biggest legend, there is someone that does not like them, so I knew that there would be people that would say that this is not my thing, and people that will like you. One thing is that I have never been of failure. I feel like you learn when you fail. For me, it was like, what are people going to say? Are there things I did wrong that people would notice?

    Your song Joromi explores a rare theme. Does it relate to your life?

    It could be. I mean the reason why it seems the girl is bolder than usual is because I’m singing about it. If you’re think about it, she is not saying anything to the guy. What you hearing me sing are her thoughts. She is trying to give the guy signs.

    In that situation, would you shoot your shot?

    (Laughs) I don’t know; maybe.

    Although it is regarded as un-African, do you think it’s advisable for a girl to probably drop hints on a guy that she likes?

    There is nothing wrong in showing a guy you like them. I mean there are definitely boundaries and there is a limit that you should adhere to, not that you should just go out like be all over. But there is nothing wrong. A guy that thinks she is cheap because she shows she likes him has a very small mind.

    Two distinct things about you are your vocals and your physique. Growing up, did they work to your disadvantage?

    I noticed that as I was growing up, I was defensive because I was small. I used to feel that everybody would want to take advantage of me because of that. I’ve always been a strong minded person. Before you give me two, I would give you five. I had to learn how to survive. Not everybody is trying to take advantage of you. I’m always sharp and ready to give it back to them. My voice has always been an advantage for me. People try to mimic my voice when am talking, I hate it so much. But it has always been a plus one for me.

    About your album, what message are you trying to pass to your fans?

    Basically, the songs are like a compilation of stories. Some of the songs are things I’ve experienced and things have seen other people experience. And the things I have felt and thought about, how things should be. For example, Love Don’t Care is very introspective. I’m thinking, is this how it’s supposed to be? I come from a culture where there is tribalism especially if you’re dating someone outside your tribe. Are you sure it’s the right thing? So I’m thinking, is this how love is supposed to be? I like to sing about real life. I sing what people can think about and say yea, that’s true.

    It would seem that your songs are predictable because most of them are about love and relationships…

    True, I have songs which are talking about them, but not all of them are saying the exact same thing. Like if you listen to Love Don’t Care, Tiff, Smile for Me, and Jamb Question, they are all telling different stories about the same thing and I think love is the most universal thing. But if you listen to my album not all of them are talking about love.

    What kind of lover would you say you are? Are you a fierce lover?

    I’m a loyal lover. I would like to say sacrificial, but that is very deep. But I’m loyal; and when I’m in, I’m all in.

    So what would one do that would really put you off?

    For me, trust is the foundation. If I can’t trust you, it’s hard for me to be with you. I think I love Nigerian men. People expect them to be trash and they also expect them to have bad attitude and they used that as a bad excuse. So if they mess around, they say he’s a man and that’s how they do. But we are all responsible for our decisions. You’re not responsible for all Nigeria men’s decision.

    What do you look out for in a man?

    I hate to be lied to.

    Why do you think Nigerian men are not romantic?

    Maybe they feel like they don’t have to be. I think that some Nigerian men do that because nobody pushes them to fight for anything so there is a sense of entitlement. They feel they are entitled to something. It’s been that way for generations. A man needs to feel like he has to fight for something cause he thinks that she will always say I am sorry. Some of Nigerian men are always self-entitled. And it’s not their fault. I blame their mothers.

    Are you saying that Nigerian women are forgiving?

    Yes, we have been trained to forgive. That’s how they raised many of us, but the narrative is changing.

    Do you agree that an international collaboration adds to an artiste’s resume?

    Yes it actually does, because if I do a song with Rihanna, there is a certain clout it will give me. It’s like expanding. When you feature, it’s like you adding.

    Talking about Falz, you guys had a musical chemistry. We were expecting you to feature him in your album. Why didn’t you?

    I have an entire EP with Falz. I’m sure we are going to do other things together but if you want to listen to something on me and Falz, we have entire project to listen to. I wanted to do something else.

    It seems there is a love triangle brewing. Should we expect an EP from you and Adekunle Gold or maybe the three of you?

    That would be funny (Laughs)

    How did you meet Adekunle Gold?

    I can’t remember where we met but I remember I saw him at a show where I was performing. He came to watch. He has been listening to my songs since when I was doing gospel music. He said he was a fan. From there, we became friends. I never knew he was a singer. I think Falz heard a song I did, we hooked up in the studio and he listened to my song. Soldier was my song actually. He heard Soldier and he was like, we should do something. But it did not come out at that time.

  • Why you should not have  extra-marital affairs (1)

    Why you should not have extra-marital affairs (1)

    NO matter how much you try to justify being in a relationship with a married man, there are no positive reasons for dating a married man.

    Below are 18 top reasons why you shouldn’t date a married man

    1. Dating a married man is just plain wrong. No reason justifies your action.
    2. You will always be second best when you date a married man. Why be second best to a married man when you can be another man’s number one?
    3. When you date a married man, everything about the relationship will be a secret because he doesn’t want anyone to know about the relationship.
    4. You ruin your reputation when you date a married man as you give people another reason to speak poorly of you.
    5. Why date a married man when he will never truly be yours. He’s married to another woman and he will never fully be able to commit to you.
    6. Dating a married man never has a happy ending.
    7. You are just a tool for his sexual gratification. No matter what he tells you, you definitely mean nothing to him.
    8. Time waits for no one. When you date a married man, you just waste precious time you might have had in a healthy relationship with a chance of flourishing.
    9. You won’t have him during special moments in his life as he would definitely spend it with his wife and family.
    10. You can’t see him or call him anytime you want. What’s the point being in a relationship in which you can’t call or see your partner anytime you want?
    11. You will become a regular customer at a hotel off town because you can’t come to his house.
    12. If someone he knows sees the both of you together, you will be introduced as his niece, cousin or even baby sitter. Why don’t you spare yourself such embarrassments.
    13. He might tell you his marriage is having issues and promise to marry you but that’s what they always say. It’s all lies.
    14. He will never respect you as a person.
    15. You can’t proudly introduce him as your man in public.
    16. Every man who knows about his relationship with you will see you as cheap and loose.
    17. If he can cheat on his wife to be with you, he will definitely cheat on you to be with someone else when he becomes tired of you.
    18. You stand a high chance of being publicly disgraced in public by a crazy wife. Spare yourself such embarrassment.

     

    Source:  www.elcrema.com