Category: New Woman

  • Female entrepreneurs charting a new future

    Female entrepreneurs charting a new future

    A group of female entrepreneurs under the umbrella of the Association of Women in Business network have been looking at ways to make access to credit easy for women all over the country.

    At a recent forum which took place at NECA house, Lagos the Coordinator of the project Titilola Adisa talked about the activities of the organization and how it had reached out to stakeholders in the past few months in order to chart a new future for female entrepreneurs.

    Also speaking at the forum was Toki Mabogunje who took time to give graphic details of the hurdles women face trying to get loans and other credit facilities. She also talked about how the women can convert these challenges to opportunities and make life easy for female entrepreneurs.

    Others speakers include Mrs. Omowunmi Omotosho,Country director of CIPE,  Mrs. Fayo Williams of NNEW and Chief Mrs. Bisi Ogunleye of the Country Women Association  of Nigeria (COWAN).

    Apart from the speakers participants also took time to identify some of the challenges they face while trying to access credit from banks and other financial institutions across the country.

    The women therefore called on the Federal government to, “put in place gender friendly policies and low interest rates for SME’s that are owned by women. This should be enacted in the constitution as well as a special policy to encourage female farmers”, Adisa says.

    She adds that: “Government policies should be reviewed periodically and regular update of SME policies should be communicated to stakeholders. This can be done with proper information dissemination. We also believe that there is a need to introduce long term loans because most of the projects are long term. It would also be good for our government to look at multiple taxation”.

    The participants at the events took a look at what financial institutions could do to make a difference. “There must be gender friendly criteria for women to access the loans. In addition the banks need to make all the terms and conditions known from the onset. It is also important for them to make use of the existing association as guarantors”.

  • ‘Women are ready to forge ahead no matter the challenges’

    ‘Women are ready to forge ahead no matter the challenges’

    Erelu Angela Adebayo is a woman of many parts. The former first lady of Ekiti State is the new chairman of WEMABOD and the first woman to ever hold the position since its inception. In this interview with Yetunde Oladeinde, she talks about turning the organisation around positively, her passion for children and helping female entrepreneurs to access credit, amongst other issues.

    What does the appointment as chairman of WEMABOD mean to you?

    I would say that the appointment is exciting and I look forward to working and making a difference. WEMABOD represents the five Southwestern states and all the assets of the Southwest were managed and are still being managed by WEMABOD, apart from Lagos State. We have never had a woman in this position. So, it is a challenge for a woman to come in now and I am looking forward to it and promise to give it my best during my tenure.

    For a lot of women entrepreneurs, accessing credit facilities from banks and the related organisations is usually a problem. How can they break this barrier?

    That is another area that I am very passionate about. I am also on the advisory board of the Dangote Foundation and this has been a great opportunity to work and network with women. We have been working with the Bank of Industry (BoI) and they have a number of facilities in this regard, giving women access to credit for their businesses. The foundation itself has micro credit facilities for these women whose businesses usually fall under the category of small and medium scale enterprises.

    How would you assess the performance of women in business?

    They are amazing; they are really amazing especially when you see the products that they are churning out. Our women are working hard in spite of the fact that the environment in which they are working is hostile. Recently, I watched a documentary by the Americans showing the challenges for American women and the fact that they are underrepresented in spite of the facilities that they have. Interestingly, that is not the case in Nigeria; the women are ready to forge ahead no matter the challenges that they are faced with.

    As a first lady, you had some projects that you were passionate about. Are you still monitoring and maintaining these projects?

    Yes, I am. The project that is dear to my heart is my children’s home. During my tenure as first lady, I put in my best and I am happy about the impact that it had on the society as well as having to touch the lives of these children for the better. The home, happily, is still on ground and the government runs it and I am the patron. It is actually doing very well and a lot of other beneficiaries are there.

    Apart from the new appointment, are you thinking of contesting for elective office soon?

    I have always said that I am not a politician. I am a wife of a politician. I give my husband due respect, but if there are opportunities for me to serve in anyway and he gives me the permission, then I would work.

    What were some of the memorable moments for you as a first lady?

    There were so many and the list would include running the children’s home, my family and my touching lives. I remember the day we went to collect the children from the hospital that the doctors were on strike and we just went there to pick this lucky children, about 18 of them. That, for me, was my first memorable moment as the first lady.

    Of course, there were so many others and there are so many other things which are commonplace that really mattered to me. For me, the important thing in life is to make a difference and touch lives. I always tell others that the areas that are a challenge to others, we should help to change and transform lives. I am a Christian and I live a life that should be emulated by others.

    Do you have a mentoring programme for young ladies and women?

    Yes, I like to help young woman and teach them how to pick up their life in the right direction. Most of the programmes that I organise are educational projects. It gives the foundation, and once you have the right foundation, you can then begin to build on it to get a better future. Unfortunately, if the foundation is not right, then you just cannot go far. I also try to work on their skills and there are programmes that are entrepreneurial in focus.

    It is over a hundred days that the Chibok girls have been missing. How do you feel about this?

    First of all, I am bothered. It is really sad and words cannot totally explain the feeling. We have to pray because there is nothing God cannot do. The women and the NGOs that have been protesting have done so much and with prayers I believe that things would definitely get better.

    If you had to advise Nigerian women, what would you tell them?

    They should pray for the nation. It is very important for us to pray persistently to bring about the changes that we all desire.

    Do you think that women in politics are doing well considering the affirmative action and other opportunities available?

    They are working hard, just like the female entrepreneurs. They have the focus but the environment is very hostile. We need to continue to give them our support and encourage them to be at their best.

    Someone is pushing a bill against NGOs, claiming that they got grants from donor agencies to sponsor programmes against our government. What do you think about this?

    There is need for enlightenment about the issue. Some people are ignorant of the facts and they need to get a better insight on the matter. I believe that one person lost to Boko Haram is one too many. We need the cooperation of the women, NGOs, faith-based organisations and everyone to tackle the problem. If we allow it to go further than this, then it would bring a terrible consequence. This actually is not about gender now. Nobody should ignore any terrorist group that comes to Nigeria or any part of the world.

  • The men in our lives (VI): Brothers

    The men in our lives (VI): Brothers

    LAST week we discussed the responsibility of our brothers towards us girls, which is to protect us and hold our hands as we coast through our impressionable years through adolescence; however, reasonably. A lot of girls face so much discomfort having to deal with over-protective big brothers. But while you may think they are monsters and forever wishing they could suddenly disappear from the surface of the earth so you can breath, some day, you’ll understand they protected you out of love. Here are a few tips on how to deal with them.

    1.     Think positive of their actions. Your brothers are only looking out for you.  They aren’t doing this to hurt you. It’s actually the exact opposite  they’re doing everything they can to make sure you don’t get hurt. They feel a sense of responsibility to watch over you. The next time they act overprotective, think of it this way: they love you and care about you enough to take care of you, and they don’t want to lose you or watch you get hurt.

    2.     Let him accompany you out if he insists. You’re too young to understand the evil in the world. There are some heartless OLDER men out there who are interested in girls as young as you. Sometimes many years older than your brother, even your father’s mates. He’s just afraid something might happen. He won’t accompany you all the time anyway!

    3.     Avoid sneaking around. If you find a guy that you really like, then introduce him to your brother, and try to get him to know the guy better. Chances are he will surely like your boyfriend better if he meets him first, rather than hearing about it much later by a group of his friends or bumping on you two at a corner.

    4.     Try your best to not fight. If you find yourself in a fight with him. Try to end it. Take a breath and breathe. No matter what you’re fighting about, fighting even more doesn’t make it better, Show him you’re mature. Show him you can act like the better person.

    5.     Confide in him. This builds up the elder brother, younger sister relationship. You’ll both get to know each other, and better yet, offer each other advice. He’ll get to know you, and you’ll get to know him, it’s a win, win. This could make him discover you are not as gullible as he thinks.

    Dear girl,

    Your big brothers got into this world before you and watched you grow. In other words, they more or less represent your father. The male folk are generally domineering and this they apply while being protective. They want you to do as they say because they feel they know best.

    Your brother wants you to stop seeing that boy because he feels he is up to no good. This is just natural. He may know better since he also has his way with girls. You just have to understand that they may not want anyone to hurt you. Their ego may be considered as well. There are a lot of boys who are wolves in sheep’s clothing. Your brother would certainly treat them with contempt.

    It would be nicer to reach a compromise with your brothers otherwise, your social life may be unenjoyable. True, they have no right to live your life for you but you may try and make them realize you are not as foolish as they think by getting close to them and letting them share in your anxieties and expectations. And most importantly, be yourself.

    If they fail to understand you and keep assuming wrongly and making false accusations, pray to God about it and follow your heart; so long as it makes you happy. Remember, to be very careful with the decisions you take as you will be the one to bear the consequences.

     

    Dear brothers,

    We love you so much just the way you love us. We thank you for being there for us since we got into this world. We only want you to know that we are no longer kids; we are growing into young adults and have some good brain. We want you to believe we are not as gullible as you think. We want you to know that we are in control of most of what happens to us. You only need to relax a bit and study us then you will realize who we really are.

    We feel so terrible and tend to rebel when you report us to our parents especially when the accusations are false. You shouldn’t believe all you hear all the time. Some people speak ill of us out of envy and others just to make unnecessary troubles for us. We would not mind being open to you and sharing our experiences with you so you can advise us better. We love you.

     

    Yours sincerely,

    Lil’ sis

  • Rings of love

    Rings of love

    Ring shopping with the groom to be? Adetorera Idowu takes you through  the different types of diamond rings to make the right choice.

    The most popular shape is the Round Brilliant-cut diamond. It is a classic with 57 facets which makes it sparkle brilliantly.

    The Princess-cut, is the second most popular shape. Princess cut diamonds are square or somewhat rectangular in shape with pointed corners and different facets that increase the diamond’s inherent sparkle.

    The Emerald-cut diamond has long, lean lines. The rectangular cut, has a larger top surface and fewer facets.

    The remarkable Asscher-cut, has recently become quite popular among more modern couples in Nigeria. It is often described as a square emerald.

    The Radiant-cut is relatively scarce and appeals to those seeking a unique look.

    The Cushion-cut has been popular for more than a century. Its rounded corners and larger facets increase the stone’s brilliance.

    The Marquise shaped diamond when worn, creates an elongated, slender look. Cleverly, it also maximizes carat weight, giving the appearance of a larger diamond than a round diamond of the same carat weight.

    The Pear shaped diamond resembles a teardrop that combines the soft, rounded end of an Oval shape with the sharp point of a Marquise-cut.

    Similar to a classic round diamond, Oval diamonds deliver a beautiful brilliance. The elongated shape adds an interesting twist to rings and accentuates the hand to create a slender look.

    The fancy-shaped Heart diamond is for the confident woman who is all heart. While sometimes selected for engagement rings, it makes a beautiful choice for pendants in fancy colors such as yellow, pink or red.

  • From sweet memories to anger and disgust

    Knocking on the emotional door can be exciting when the one who opens the door is a jolly good fellow. Here, you are likely to meet a heart that is loving and compassionate. The love process becomes sweet and filled with memories that you would definitely want to linger forever. Falling in love in this kind of atmosphere naturally gets better.

    Interestingly for some people in this category, love waxes stronger and stronger. That is why it’s such a shock when, once we finally find a partner and instead of basking in the euphoria you have dreamt about all this while you begin to discover sorts of the negative trends, characteristics and feeling.

    At this point, you just cannot fathom where this emotional nightmare is coming from at all. Could this be a new trend or it has always been there, unknown to our blind, emotional eyes? All we know is that our partner suddenly seems distant and inconsiderate, or we feel an undercurrent of anger and disgust with him or her.

    For a lot of us, this certainly sounds familiar. It should, because it happens in virtually every relationship – even the most loving. It’s how you handle this common occurrence that determines whether you’ll experience the heights of romantic love or you are doomed to feel unfulfilled in your relationships.

    Courtship actually helps to unravel all the emotional mysteries that we run into from time to time. It helps you detect who you are going to be entangled with for the rest of your life or for some years as the case may be. However, there are a number of relationships where the unusual still persists, no matter how long the courtship period lasts for. Some people are damn too secretive and they would only show you the parts of their lives that they want you to see.

    If you are the nosy type, then they would put up the magical garb and the more you look the less you are likely to see. In this arena, the emotional monster becomes a saint and the dullest brain pretends to be a superstar until the show is over. At such points, it is usually too late and there is almost nothing you can do or say to change the scenario that has played itself out.

    Getting the right partner, sometimes, means that the other person’s ego may have to fade away to rediscover the emotional potentials in the other person. Someone who has enough affection in store would definitely not worry if the one he or she is in love with does not have anything, if they are truly in love.

    The most important thing, here, would be to embrace the future and all its possibilities. Here, what is required is a positive emotional attitude.

    Unfortunately, this is usually a herculean task for many. So, what is popular are cases where lovebirds make a number of mistakes and then pass the buck to the other. Buck passing, however, does not solve any problem, instead it compounds the problem and it becomes more complex than we ever imagined at the beginning. The truth of the matter is that in every relationship there would always be dark patches and your ability to lighten up the emotional tunnel would turn things around.

    Also, whenever you find that reasoning has gone out of the emotional window, then it is better to allow maturity to take over. Don’t get carried away by your self esteem because it doesn’t work out this way. Pride and arrogance should be played down if you are serious about making a mountain out of your emotional molehill. As a woman, you need to constantly remind yourself that every man has a battle with his ego.

    So, it is better to protect his ego and not trample upon it. Once this is done, you can be sure of a gate pass into his emotional archives and library. The next stage, therefore, would be for you to find a replacement. If you are lucky, then you would find another good bargain in the emotional supermarket.

    However, if you fall on the other side of the divide, then what you are likely to run into may be the autocratic man. This type of man is fully in charge and all-knowing. He is unbending, unyielding and takes no contribution from the one he claims he loves. Well, why do you need to counsel a genius in the first place? Wasn’t that what you always dreamt about, to brag about the love of your life because he is intelligent and talented?

    You have always wanted a super hero and now that you have found him, why are you making a u-turn and complaining? If you are in this kind of relationship, then you would also find that your man has no mentor. He does not fear, honour and respect anybody and you must be in an emotional turmoil. Perhaps you need to get an adviser; someone who would talk some sense into his head.

  • ‘Affection’ on the Dead Sea

    The sea brings to mind lots of water, different species of fishes and other creatures. Naturally, the picture that comes to mind is an environment that is rich physically, depicting all kinds of emotional gestures. Its natural environment is bound to be a booster for affection, attraction, infatuation and fondness.

    However, if you affection is located on the Dead Sea, you are not likely to go far. No matter what you do and the efforts you put in, you are not likely to find any fish (heart) not to talk of locating your dream fish (heart).

    The Dead Sea, historically, has attracted visitors (hearts) from all over the world for thousands of years. It is known as the Salt Lake, famous for incredibly high levels of salt – the deepest hypersaline lake in the world. This salinity makes for a harsh environment in which animals of any kind cannot flourish.

    However, it has been the supplier of a wide variety of products like balms for Egyptian mummification, potash for fertilisers, cosmetics and herbal products.

    The scarcity of aquatic life in the Dead Sea can be compared with relationships that have no future from the outset. The question here is how do you get into dead relationships? How do you determine who or what to avoid in the search for a befitting heart? A heart that would bring joy and not tales of sorrow, tears and blood. A loving heart and not a cheap sadist masquerading to be sweet and nice just because he or she is planning to rip you off someday.

    32-year-old Josephine’s heart is sinking miserably on the affectionate Dead Sea. She has actually given up all hope of finding love again after three cases of misplaced affection. “The last relationship was the most painful. We had saved some resources together to rent a house and start a family. We also travelled to see his parents and family members about three months before everything crashed like a pack of cards. It was at that point that I realised that he had been deceiving me all along.”

    On his part, he did not wait to give this poor heart any explanation about the whole emotional mess. Instead, he got a ticket and travelled out of the country, far away from this dying or ‘dead’ heart.

    Now she thinks that she has found love again but sadly her affection is with the wrong heart. “I am in love with my sister’s husband and I don’t know that to do about the situation. The man keeps making flirtatious gestures towards me and I am so confused. Deep inside, something tells me to say yes because he is what I have been wishing for all my life.”

    That is not all! “I think that my sister is very ungrateful and she treats him badly. Each time you pay them a visit, he is always complaining about how tired he has become of her. It is sad that my sister does not appreciate him at all and she does not value what she has.”

    Emotional traitor! There are so many of them around looking for hearts to be stolen and hijacked for themselves. Sadly, a lot of people live, wine and dine with traitors. They entrust their lives and hearts to charlatans who end up plotting their betrayal in a very wicked way. Hearts that hide mischievously in the background, planning how to steal what belongs to others.

    How can you continue to smile sheepishly at somebody, seduce him or her and not expect a reaction? Whether the reaction is positive or negative is another matter entirely. “How can she smile cheaply at your man, claiming that you do not appreciate what you’ve got?”

    How on earth can someone stoop so low and lose her heart to a sister’s boyfriend, fiancé or husband?  Or even a friend’s husband for that matter? What kind of friend could that be? Here it would be better to hug the enemy instead of settling for this kind of friendship.

    Besides, who made you the judge of whether or not she appreciates him or not? Are you the emotional spy, the forerunner who must step into her emotional shoes? As a good and loyal sister or friend, your only duty is not just to be trusted, be loyal and stop looking for excuses to justify your lust for her man.

    She continued: “I have been in four different relationships in the past six years but I have not succeeded in having any stable relationship. The relationships all start on a very bright note, but when I think have gotten it right, things just begin to fall apart.”

    However, she noticed that men who have a soft spot for her are usually already engaged. “When my best friend got married a few years ago, I met the best man and I really liked him. Then I began to pray that she would throw the bouquet in my direction. There and then I began to propose to me and marry me later.”

    Was this a dream come true? No, it wasn’t! “When I made enquiries from my friend, I realised that he was already married. To my utmost surprise, he also liked me so much and he wanted us to be friends. Unfortunately, we both knew that we weren’t going to go far.”

  • ‘At 80, I’m just starting life’

    ‘At 80, I’m just starting life’

    Chief Mrs. Bisi Ogunleye is the founder of the Country Women Association (COWAN). The organisation which started about 32 years ago began by empowering 225 women with micro credit facilities to boost their businesses. Today, over 320,000 women are beneficiaries of the project she is passionate about. At a point, Ogunleye was invited by the Central Bank to share her success story and management tips with directors of would-be micro finance banks in the country. In this interview, she speaks with Yetunde Oladeinde about her economic empowerment package, living a healthy lifestyle and how she turned an unemployment challenge to a great opportunity in the United States.

    WHAT is the secret of your good health? It is because I live as a Nigerian, eat Nigerian traditional foods and take to the laws of good health which my mother gave me.

    Can you share some of these laws with us?

    First, is to eat good vegetables. Scientists are saying it today, practically they taught us to have vegetables around us and traditionally we had lots of fruits around us. We don’t eat in the olden days in our farms without one fruit or the other beside us. At that time, we thought we were poor and that was why we were not eating bread like the others.

    We were eating plantain which was good food but we did not appreciate it then. Now, I am doing exactly what she told me then. My mother died at the age of 115 years. If she lived on all those vegetables and was able to live long, why should I die at 80 or thereabout, eating fake fast foods? I am still young.

    How old are you now?

    That, I do not know precisely. I should be about 80 years. The Bible says that someone who is 100 years among them is a young person. My father did not die young; he died at the age of 110 years. Therefore, if they did not die young, then I am just starting my own life.

    Talking about just starting your life now, what is a typical day like now?

    It is one of the things that I inherited from my mother. She was very active and hardworking. I like cooking, writing, reading, talking and chatting with people. I like meeting people, helping them rediscover themselves and I still do that. But I never ask people to do what I don’t do.

    What are the things that you write about?

    I like to bring out the beauty in some of the things we do, that the modern technology or the western contact is making us lose. The value of saving; it is part of our culture. Our mothers would never go to bed without leaving extra food in the house, because of the strangers that can come any time.

    They liked saving money to help one another and it was called esusu or ajo. These are the small, small money that is called inclusion into the big money, which they are talking about. The esusu and ajo that people put together in the market at the family level or church level. If you add this together, you find that it is a lot of money but they do not value it. I remember when we went for a micro credit campaign in Washington in the year 1992.

    There, I spoke on a topic called esusu but the Nigerians who were there got annoyed. They said that I went to disgrace Nigerians at the event talking about pennies and all that. They argued that that was not what we should be talking about at that point. Interestingly, one of them is a senator and I am trying to make him come up with a law on esusu and ajo as one of the things that have been our natural way of life. So I write on some of these things and how you can turn that to wealth.

    How do you feel helping to turn around the lives of so many women in different parts of the country?

    They turned their own lives around. Have I turned around my own life, not to talk of turning somebody else’s life around? What I did is like a torch. You are the one holding the torch but the torch would show you the way and change your life. What actually turned their lives around was when this woman woke up to value their lives. Even though they did not appreciate what they were doing with themselves. At that point, they thought that once you go to school, you are their lord and they are nothing. When you go to their villages, they would say that mama would give you plantain, mama would give you oil, mama would give you yam, but what do you give mama? However, I believe they have a lot that they do; the love they have for their family, children, fellow women and the other sacrifices they make are all very important. Unfortunately, they did not put value on it. These are the things that I made them realise and that they are the backbone of the country. Immediately they grabbed this, things changed and they began to do a lot of things that inspired others. They also taught me a lot about leaves, herbs, the healthy lifestyle, and the things God said we should eat and be well. leaves, herbs, the healthy lifestyle, and the things God said we should eat and be well.

    All I did was to first of all help to package it and after packaging I helped them to market it. After this, I helped to create a negotiating table for them.

    COWAN was very popular during Maryam Babangida’s Better Life era. What role did the first lady play at that point?

    Better Life I would not say came out of COWAN. May her soul rest in peace. She told many people that when she saw what COWAN was doing, she thought somebody must take it up at the policy level. Better Life was to wake up the policy makers and government in particular; to see to the special role the rural women were playing in the development of this country.  Better Life and COWAN cannot die; it is not a name but an action. COWAN would die only when there is no rural woman.

    Are you saying that the structure in place would survive long after you are gone?

    Why not? I am not COWAN, I am only an instrument and I am empowering them to empower other women. It is just like Elijah in the Bible who told Elisha: ‘see me when I am going, and then grab me and I am happy.’

    You come from a family of people who are strong and outstanding in their fields; what does this mean to you?

    I always tell my brothers and sisters that God has been very faithful to our parents. I think there must be something between this God and our parents. Whatever we have become today is not because we are good but like when God told Abraham that as long as your children do not forget me, this covenant would I keep.

    We learnt a lot of hard work from our parents. My father was a policeman but I did not grow up to know him as a policeman. He was then a farmer and my four mothers worked with him. He was a polygamist. One of the things that were a bit different in our family was that even though it was a polygamous home, we did not see ourselves as coming from a polygamous home.  I remember that in those days, we had only one mother and the rest were known as aunties or sisters. The one in charge was the senior wife; the treasurer was the senior wife, she was the one who could stand up to the husband and defend the other wives. So, there was cooperation and love. Some of my siblings include Bishop Olukolade and Major General Olukolade. There are so many pastors, deacons and deaconesses in the family. I am the Iya Ijo of Holy Trinity Church, Ido-Ani Diocese. were known as aunties or sisters. The one in charge was the senior wife; the treasurer was the senior wife, she was the one who could stand up to the husband and defend the other wives. So, there was cooperation and love. Some of my siblings include Bishop Olukolade and Major General Olukolade. There are so many pastors, deacons and deaconesses in the family. I am the Iya Ijo of Holy Trinity Church, Ido-Ani Diocese.

    If you had to advise women, what would you tell them?

    I would tell them to value themselves. If you do not see yourself as anything, nobody would value you. Make sure you continue to do what is good. Then it is also important to train your children properly. It is sad that some mothers do not train their children at all and they allow them to be bigger than them. Just before my mother died, I was to go for a COWAN meeting at Kogi State in 2003 and as I was getting too late, she shouted at me, saying that ‘your father would never be late for an event. Get out of that place and go to your Kogi or no Kogi.’ At that stage, she was after me doing the right thing. Whatever they become tomorrow, it is you. Those young ones are doing wrong things these days and you find them doing things that they should not be doing. I pity the situation that they are in. When you are idle, the devil would give you another job. Instead of them thinking of this, they should look at their background and see what they can do. Many people are saying that it is because they have no job, but how many people employed Dangote, how many people employed Bill Gate? You should think of creating something. When I got to America, I had no job. They refused to employ me as a teacher who had worked in Nigeria for about 25 years. So I started weaving aso-oke shawls and that opened a number of doors for me. Now, they call me and specially invite me to become a lecturer at the Carnegie Melon University for African Studies. So, you see that you can create a job for yourself. Instead of our youths being on the wrong side, let them try to be on the right side.

  • ‘How I withstood my husband’s  scorn to start my waste buiness

    ‘How I withstood my husband’s scorn to start my waste buiness

    Unemployment and lack of resources to carry out a legitimate business has become a problem for many. Interestingly, there are some opportunities around that require little or no capital to start. Yetunde Oladeinde finds out one of such is making money out of wastes. Recycling has so many potential like its adoption of recycling as a veritable option to landfill or serve for the production of tissue paper, paper, can, glass and plastic waste.

    Matilda Taiwo is a successful waste recycler and the CEO of Goodware Stitches. She graduated from the Yaba College of Technology, Lagos where she studied Business Administration and in 2011 she was one of the beneficiaries of the Pan African University and federal government initiative for entrepreneurs taking their businesses to the next level.

    “I worked in the Personnel Department of Flour Mills for about two years and moved on to work with Berger Paints as a Sales Coordinator for about 14 years. It was a very interesting experience and I learnt a lot about building a brand, marketing and more.”

    She resigned to go into private business in 1993, first as an event decorator, and she has done this for about 20 years now. “The business is still on and I find it exciting transforming the venue for parties and creating something different from others. Event planning and décor was good because I had a passion for it to a fault. It was quite lucrative and I got the support needed from my staff. To succeed, you have to be very creative and I love bringing new ideas into whatever I am doing.”

    Asked how she got into manufacturing and she replied this way: “I loved manufacturing from the outset and this gave birth to Goodware Stitches Ltd. In 2007, I started research work on how to go into the recycling line of business. At the beginning, we were gathering wastes for others. We also bought from scavengers who are now known as Source Managers. At a point, we started supplying our raw materials to some Chinese people who needed it for some products.”

    Taiwo continued: “Then one day, while we were in a factory, a Chinese client told me that inside your gutter, on your streets, you have a lot of money but you people cannot see it. He then said he could see potential in me as a recycler. He said I had the zeal and everything it took to be a waste recycler. That was the turning point for me. When I got home that day, I sat down for about four hours meditating on the words and I realised that the guy was right. So, that was how it started in 2007.”

    How was it like at the beginning? “It was very challenging. First, it was a tug of war between me and my husband. He wondered why I should go into something that was demeaning and turn the house to waste. I pleaded with him and started the business from the house. We later rented a mini factory somewhere on Ogundipe Street in Shasha, Lagos. It was a small place and we got bigger and better.” Four years later, the expansion gradually took her to Ikorodu Industrial Development Centre where they built the factory.

    How would she compare the changes that have taken place since she started and now? “I had to build the factory with personal funds, bought the generator, machines and started the recycling business. It was tough at the beginning but things are getting better. We thank God for where we are today, even though we are not yet where we want to be. Apart from manufacturing waste bags and poly products, we have also been able to develop between 100 and 200 products that we can recycle. It is a capital-intensive project and we need reliable investors to come in as partners and the support of banks that are SME-friendly.”

    Her dream is to see Nigeria setting a pace in future as an industrialised nation, “a place where every household would be producing finished products made from waste recycling.” Talking about banks and the role they play when it comes to accessing credit for SMEs, Taiwo said: “I would say that it is difficult to access loans because banks just concentrate on giving out loans. That should not be the only thing, they can also be part of the business too. When they disburse the money, they should also be there to monitor the process.”

    Taiwo stated that government needs to give more attention and support to SMEs in the country. “To an extent, we are yet to feel the impact because the money is being given to the wrong people. It is not going to those who really need the money. In the sector, there are so many opportunities to create wealth and employment for young people.”

    What is the secret of her success? you ask. “It is the passion. I am happy when people comment about my product. I get inspired. This year, we were in Gambia and last year we were in Togo, and the trips were sponsored by the first lady of Ogun State and Nigerian Export Promotion Council to showcase products produced in Nigeria by Nigerians. There we met people who loved our products and we got an MOU from them.”

    She declared that “rural women are involved in the collection of waste and it is a way of empowering them. In Nigeria, the owner of the business must be on ground to monitor things because of the attitude of the personnel.”

  • What to expect on your wedding night

    What to expect on your wedding night

    It’s been a long, tiring journey, planning for your wedding. The running around, the planning, the actual wedding day; it will all take a toll on you and your beloved mentally, emotionally and physically. By the end of your wedding day, you’ll be tired though chances are you might not even feel it.

    Our plan for the honeymoon night was dinner, lots of cuddles, massage, plenty of rest and sleep. But things didn’t’ go according to plan! The saving grace was that we’d talked about slowing down so we were able to extend a lot grace to ourselves later.

    “Slowing down” is easy to say, but not so easy to follow through when you feel like you’ve been waiting forever! So, you’ll need to discuss with your husband-to-be and be on the same page. Don’t get into intimate details but have a rough idea how the evening will play out.

    For example, a typical wedding ceremony might last the whole day. Afterwards, a couple will have a long drive or flight to their honeymoon destination. There’s only so much you can do after being awake and active for almost twenty-four hours. There’s no hard and fast rule but if you can plan to ease into intimacy, the better the evening/night will be.

    Past sexual experience will not make you a “pro” on your wedding night. If anything, you have a lot to unlearn and lots to learn. Also on this first night, you’ll want to err on the side of less “wow”. Most grooms want to wow their brides on the wedding night, many brides want the night to be memorable and intimate and scoring a 10 out of 10.

    But sometimes super high expectations can set you up for serious disappointment when things don’t go according to plan. It’s so much easier when you come to your wedding night wearing a learner’s hat because learners don’t have anything to lose but everything to gain. So, prepare to become a student of your spouse, not just on the wedding night, but for the rest of your married life.

    Begin to ask God to do a deep work in you now, to change you and transform you. It’s easy to feel clumsy and foolish, easy to begin to think that you’ll never learn anything. Actually, there’s a little truth in there; you will always be learning something  better get comfy in that student seat!

    Making love can be awkward, messy and hilarious! Doing it for the first time can be twice as awkward, twice as messy and twice as hilarious!

    There’s no other place where wives hope their husbands will read their minds the most like the marriage bed. And you’ll discover this on your wedding night where you sort-of hope he will figure out your body all by himself without a lot of input.

    The reality of the matter is that you are learning your own body too (and his), so it’s not like you are expected to deliver a whole thesis. So you’ll need to begin to learn how to communicate and engage, to let him know what’s going on with you.

    And in order to let him know what’s going on with you, you’ll need to understand what’s going on with you. Don’t fall for the lie that “he’s the man, he’ll figure it out.” He won’t figure it out because he doesn’t live in your brain. And even if he did, his brain works very differently!

    One of the things you need to begin to learn on your wedding night is to rein in your thoughts and concentrate on the moment. So you want to get a resource and learn something. Begin to unlearn untruths and learn the truth.

    The first night might be uncomfortable, but that’s all it is (or should be). The wedding night is not the end, but the start of your life together.

    You don’t have to have a perfect wedding night. In fact, most couples will tell you that they did not have a picture perfect wedding night. But they loved it anyway.

    With all the embarrassments and little issues, it was the start of their married life and they wouldn’t trade the experience for anything. There’s so much to be grateful for and so much to look forward to.

    Real intimacy in marriage is not just about sex. It’s about connecting in all areas – mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Hopefully, you’ve been connecting in all these other areas (minus the physical) before your wedding night. Work on building your friendship during engagement and courtship, because it’s connecting in these other areas that makes sex beautiful.

  • I have been playing around

    She isn’t so keen

    I have been in a relationship with a girl I met on a plane about two years ago. As soon as I saw her I knew that she was the kind of woman that I wanted to marry. We got closer and I liked almost everything I saw and heard about her and her immediate family. However, I realised that I am the only one making efforts to make the relationship work. On her part, there is a non -challant attitude and I wonder if things would work this way. Bala

     

    Response

    Happiness is not something that is ready-made. You just have to work towards it on a daily basis. If what you want is a healthy relationship, then you must work towards it. It is about two people who truly want to work together to create something meaningful out of life. Love is great when spoken, but greatest when shown. You need to do little things daily to show your loved ones that you care.

     

    I have been playing around

    My fiancée sent a letter to me last week telling me that she was no longer interested in the relationship. Her letter took me by surprise but I guess her reasons are genuine. She stated that she had stayed too long in the relationship and found that I wasn’t showing some level of commitment because I was dating other women. Well, I thought I was just doing what the other guys were doing and that I still had time to play around a little. However, she is the one that I love and wish that she would take me back. Do you think that she would come back if I apologise and promise to change my ways? Henry

     

    Response

    You cannot eat your cake and have it back. If she continues to hang around and you finally decide to marry another person, then you would have succeeded in ruining her life. The truth of the matter is that, there cannot be a relationship without commitment. You cannot win a heart unless there is loyalty, understanding, patience and persistence. If you are sure that you are serious, then go back to her and propose to her right away.

     

    Didn’t get my mother’s approval

    Please I need your advice. I have been in a relationship for about three years and we want to marry each other. But my mother is against it because he is not from my state. He is a Yoruba man and I love him so much. Please what can I do? I do not want to lose him. Amara

     

    Response

    Even though it is important to respect the wish of your mother, your needs also matter. You can’t ignore your feelings especially when you have found what you really want. Plead with your mother to change her mind. Sometimes, you just have to do what’s best for you, your life and not what is best for someone else. So, you have to say what you need to say and let her know how you feel about this guy. If you do not speak up now, you may live to regret losing the one you love.