The Nation Newspaper

Category: Family Forum

  • Building trust in your relationship

    DEAR Reader, You are welcome to the month of June. It is my prayer that this new month, God shall visit and give you a testimony that will make you to rejoice in Jesus’ name! This month, I want to teach on a subject I have titled: Building Trust in your Relationship and I shall be focusing on Trust this week.

    Trust is probably the most important ingredient in building a good relationship with others and in building an intimate relationship between husband and wife. Trust is something that can be cultivated and nurtured if you will follow the guidelines below. It is important for us to know that trust is an essential and vital ingredient in our daily living, whether family life or in our relationship with others.

    WHAT IS TRUST?

    The Oxford dictionary defines trust as the firm belief in the reliability, truth or strength of a person, confident expectation, obligation or responsibility. It is also a state of being relied upon. In a practical sense, trust means that you place confidence in someone to be honest and faithful to you, and not abandon you. Trust is not a gift; it is a virtue built through experience and over a period of time. Trust is reciprocal. The more you express your trust to others or members of your household, the more they respond to you in trust. Trust grows over time. It takes time to build trust and you need to show your partner that you are trustworthy, and that you trust him/her in return.

    WHY DO WE NEED TO TRUST?

    Because trust is part of our daily lives and the very essence of life depends on it. For instance, you go to bed at night with a perfect plan for the next day, because you trust that you will wake up the next morning. You eat your food with confident that your body network is designed to digest the food.  You go to work daily trusting that the job you closed from yesterday is still there waiting for you.  You breathe freely without bothering to crosscheck the oxygen level or quality of the air.  All these actions are products of trust.

    There is no relationship that can survive an environment devoid of trust. If your marriage must work, you must learn to trust your partner. You need to trust your partner with your life, your past, present and future. Marriage is dependent on the belief that you are loved and accepted the way you are. This fact helps you relax and let down your confidence. Trust makes room for honesty without fear of rejection. The Word of God says: The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil (Proverbs 31:11). When a man trusts his wife, he has the confidence that his wife can take care of certain issues that affect the family. I can never forget some years back when my husband came to my office and handed over a cheque booklet, all signed.

    The reason is that he had found me trustworthy in the area of handling financial matters; therefore, he could trust me with the handling of the money in that account without regretting such action.

    HOW TO BUILD TRUST IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

    You need to be truthful

    In building trust in your relationship, you must be truthful. Be truthful to your spouse and family members. Don’t be known to say one thing today and another tomorrow on the same issue. There is no substitute for truth! Your “yea” must be found to be yea, and your “nay” found to be nay. If you are a person with double standards, it becomes difficult to trust you.

    Constantly work on improving your communication skills

    Develop the skill of being a good listener, which is one of the hardest skills to develop. Being a good listener means you don’t interrupt your spouse. This requires great discipline and respect. Learn to ask, “Have you finished?” Always make sure that you’ve fully understood what the other person has said.

    Take responsibility to clearly express your needs

    When a person feels he or she cannot express his needs to the other person, it leads to a break down in trust. We often don’t express our needs for two reasons. Either we are afraid of rejection or a feeling of shame for having such needs.

    Keeping Your Promises

    One of the ways by which you can build trust whether in your family life or in other relationships is by keeping your promises. It will interest you to know that promises have a way of creating excitement. It brings anticipation and hope, and if not kept, it destroys trust. If for any reason you are not able to keep your promises, ensure that a thorough and honest explanation is given for it. It is, therefore, important not to make promises you know you will not be able to keep.

    To build trust in your relationship, you need to surrender your life to Christ first and foremost. You can say this prayer and be born again: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom”.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Making a difference (4)

    DEAR Reader, It is a good thing to be with you today. I have taught on the woman as the last born of God, a productive woman and what a woman of difference can be called.

    This week, I will be concluding this teaching with the topic: Possessing a Heart for God.

    To make a difference in life, you need to possess a heart for God. God does not need your money, He does not need your possessions; all He truly wants is your heart. How do you give Him your heart? You let His Word dwell richly in your heart. The Word of God says: Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord (Colossians 3:16). You consciously put the Word of God into your heart. Spend quality time with the Word, in prayer and fellowship with God then you will find the Word dwelling richly in your heart that will help you to make the difference in your world. You need the Word of God to rule your world.

    What you put inside your heart is what determines your character, just as it is said in the computer world, “Garbage in, garbage out”. Don’t read all those filthy pornographic books, because what you put inside is what will manifest outwardly. Hide the Word in your heart and it will generate the fear of God in your heart. So, whatever temptation you are faced with, like Joseph you will say: There is none greater in this house than I; neither hath he kept back any thing from me but thee, because thou art his wife: how then can I do this great wickedness, and sin against God? (Genesis 39:9).

    Be Purpose-Driven

    Until you discover your purpose for living, building a godly character might be a difficult task. When you discover your purpose, it gives you direction and focus  and you know that focus is power (Hebrews 12:2). Men of sound character are usually men of purpose and vice versa.

    Be Mindful Of Your Association

    The association you keep will always affect your behaviour; it does not leave you neutral. If your close friend is a liar, gossip, fornicator, etc, you will invariably get involved in the same vices. This proves true in the adage that says, “Show me your friend and I will tell you who you are”. Who is your friend?

    Depend On The Holy Spirit

    The Holy Spirit is the agent of change. Without Him, your character cannot be moulded, because developing a godly character is not by power or might. The Word of God says:  For who hath despised the day of small things? for they shall rejoice, and shall see the plummet in the hand of Zerubbabel with those seven; they are the eyes of the Lord, which run to and fro through the whole earth (Zechariah 4:10).

    It is not enough to be baptised in the Holy Spirit and speak in tongues; you must constantly go to Him for help. At any point you feel you’ve missed it, return to God; let Him know that you are sorry. Then, give the Holy Spirit the opportunity to supply the strength you need, so that you will not miss it again. The Holy Spirit is always there to help you, so don’t grieve Him with sin (1 Thessalonians 5:19).

    To possess a heart for God, you need to surrender your heart to Christ. If you are ready for this new birth experience, please say this prayer: Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today as a sinner. Forgive me of my sins. I believe You died and rose on the third day for my sins. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name.

     

    Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Secrets to marital bliss (2)

    DEAR Reader, last week, one of the secrets to marital bliss, which is wisdom, was unlocked to us. This week, we will yet be looking at another secret, Effective Communication.

    There are many families on this earth that are not alive, but dead. They are just existing by name. When it comes to how each member relates to the other, there is no life, no communication. You won’t believe that such people are from the same family by the way they treat each other.

    Being a family by name alone means bearing the family name e.g. Ademola’s family, Olushola’s family etc. When it comes to common characteristics e.g. love, discussions, doing things together, etc., they are poles apart. This ought not to be so, but the life line (communication) is not functioning properly, and in some cases it has been cut off. To prevent your family from merely existing, instead of thriving (growing strong, healthy, prospering etc), don’t just talk to each other at home; rather, you must learn to communicate effectively.

    The difference between talking and communication is: talking is one way and may not necessarily be sincere (truth and sincerity are probably absent), but communication and the right kind is two-way – both parties are airing their views and truth, and sincerity are involved. To communicate means to share or exchange information.  You may ask, “This is what I think; how about you?   What do you think?” It also means to consider the other person’s view; or to be connected.

    It is coined from the word communion, which means “sharing in common.” A wise man once said, “If you talk together, you will stay together” and the opposite is true too. Any conversation which is one-way falls short of God’s ideal in the family.

    For instance, if as a couple, you as the wife are always talking and never allowing your husband to speak or properly express himself, you will find out that most times he will end up doing things that surprise you. You may feel, “He never discussed it with me”. Probably, you didn’t give him the time to discuss with you; rather, you controlled the conversation most times. My husband once said, “Poor communication is the major cause for brutality”.  Since they can’t communicate effectively, such couples resort to physical combat and violence, in order to express their deep feelings.

    Most times, you find out that your children are not opening up to you all of a sudden, and you are panicking because they are becoming strangers to you. Maybe you haven’t created time to spend with them and discuss or you have been the only one talking in your discussions with them and not encouraging them to share their minds and feelings with you, or you scold them too often. Try and think of when the breakdown in communication started.

    Effective communication begins with having a good relationship with Jesus Christ. This is done by confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as your Saviour and Lord. If you are ready for this new birth experience, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • God’s standard for locating a marriage partner

    DEAR Reader, With joy unspeakable full of glory, I sincerely welcome you to this edition of Family Life in Jesus’ Name. This month, by the enabling power of the Holy Spirit, we shall be looking at God’s Standard for Locating a Marriage Partner.

    The success of your marriage depends on these points that I shall be discussing with you on this column. They are very simple and cannot be overlooked, because your success in marriage is not guaranteed without following these principles. This week, we will be looking at Spiritual Compatibility.

    The first principle according to God’s own standard for locating marriage partner is to marry among God’s own people. The Abrahamic covenant does not permit a believer to marry a stranger; it must be from among your brethren.

    Abraham understood this principle to the point that he gave his servant these strict orders: You will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell; but you shall go to my country and to my kindred, and take a wife for my son Isaac (Genesis15:3-4). The Canaanites were notorious idolaters. Their gods and goddesses promoted worship that included human sacrifices and fertility rites with perverse sex. Modern day Canaanites are not always so obviously pagan. They can appear religious in a positive sense, but being religious is not enough.

    A personal relationship with Jesus is the cornerstone of any successful marriage.  There is no meeting point between a Christian and a sinner/unbeliever. God’s Word says: Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness? (2 Corinthians 6:14).

    A saved person and an unbeliever cannot have real fellowship, communion or concord. This is primarily because there is a fundamental difference between the character and lifestyle of one who is saved, and one who is not.

    As a born-again believer in Christ, you must guard against the temptation to overlook this most basic issue of spiritual compatibility. Just because the young man or woman is kind and considerate, or seems to be genuinely in love with you, you draw the conclusion that he/she is the one. Don’t allow your feelings to lead you to trample on your relationship with the Lord.

    Don’t ever be deceived to think that you can go ahead to marry an unbeliever, with the intention of converting him or her. Even though the apostles Paul and Peter spoke of the possibility of winning an unbelieving spouse to the Lord (1 Corinthians 7:12-16; 1 Peter 3:1-2), that does not mean we should go into marriage knowing we are spiritually incompatible. A believer who marries an unbeliever may be facing a lifetime of spiritual unrest in the marriage and a battle for the spiritual well-being of their children. So, beware!

    How Do I make The Move?

    Look in the appropriate place and ask the Lord for help. To find a compatible, spiritual wife, Abraham sent Eliezer to the logical place – his hometown (Genesis 24:3-4, 10). Eliezer didn’t go into a pagan Canaanite village to look for a wife for Isaac. Eliezer prayed about the marriage he was arranging (Genesis 24:12) and saw God’s leading. Nothing could have been more practical or wise.

    Don’t base your decision on one “sign.” Even though you may believe the sign is from the Lord, don’t throw out wisdom. When Eliezer asked the Lord for a sign (a young woman who would offer water to him and his camels), he didn’t jump to the conclusion that Rebekah was the right one when she offered water. The text tells us that even after she passed the initial test, Eliezer quietly observed her and wondered if she truly was the one who was right for Isaac (Genesis 24: 21).

    The most logical move you can make is to put your searching heart into God’s hands. This is why it becomes necessary for you to allow the Holy Spirit to guide you. What the Holy Spirit does is to illuminate your spiritual eyes so that as soon as your physical eyes come in contact with someone, you will know whether such a person is the right person for you or not. If that person happens to be the right person, there will be a confirmation in your spirit. If that is not the right person, the Spirit of God in you will warn you to keep off.

    Eliezer had observed Rebekah’s character, as she humbly brought water for him and his camels. When he talked with her, he knew that she was from the right family (Genesis 24: 24-27). Then, as he talked with her father and brother, Eliezer received added confirmation when they were quick to give their approval. The final indication was Rebekah’s own declaration that she was willing to go (Genesis 24:58). The combination of all these factors helped to verify the choice.

    However, it is important to know that until you are a born-again child of God, God cannot lead you to make the right choice. To be born again entails confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as your Saviour and Lord. If you are ready to be born again, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Becoming a help meet (4)

    DEAR Reader, You are welcome to another wonderful time in God’s presence. So far, I have showed you how to know your position as a helpmeet. I also told you to examine yourself whether you are hurting or helping your husband. Last week, I gave you one vital key of becoming a help meet, which is operating in wisdom. Today, I want to give you the Secrets for Family Distinction.

    I am glad to let you know that there is so much good reserved for you in your home, family, spouse, children, business, finance and career, this year, but the Bible says: If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land (Isaiah 1:19).Whatever God tells you to do this year, do it. There is a reward in obedience. You shall not miss your portion this year in Jesus’ Name. Purpose in your heart to obey God: be determined to do His will, and refuse to be among the evil doers. In addition, choose that which is good and then, you will see His outstretched arm in your direction this year, and you will become a positive surprise to all around you in Jesus’ Name.

    In this New Year, God is telling us to arise. It is a commandment from God, which does not depend on your feeling or ability. Thereafter, arise from the failures and woes of the previous year, and shake your feet from the dust. As a family, put an instant stop to counting your losses of last year. Instead, arise from within you in obedience, and God shall strengthen you. The Word of God says: Arise, shine; for thy light is come, and the glory of the LORD is risen upon thee (Isaiah 60:1).

    In a time of famine, hardship, woes and economic recession, the Word of God came to Isaac saying arise and take action. He did not argue with God; instead, he arose and sowed. The Word of God says: Then Isaac sowed in that land, and received in the same year an hundredfold: and the LORD blessed him (Genesis 26:12). You can see the returns. God is ready to care for you from the beginning of this year to the end (Deuteronomy 11:12), but you have a duty to allow Him. How do you arise?

    1.SPIRITUALLY:

    It takes light to shine, and light comes by the Word of God. The Word of God says: The entrance of thy words giveth light; it giveth understanding unto the simple (Psalms 119:130). It is what you do with His Word this year that will determine how much you shine. Husbands, you are the head of the home, sit down with the Word this year, and give meaningful direction for your household. Don’t go about like a mule and horse without understanding. Enough of foolishness; this year must produce for you. Your family must become an envy of everyone around you this year. Locate the direction for your family in the Word and no devil would be able stop your family from shining. Arise from your slumber. Don’t starve spiritually.

    Until you arise, there can’t be a lifting up. In your prayer life, arise. In the study of the Word, arise. Ensure that your study to avoid shame this year (2 Timothy 2:15). Arise and Christ shall give you light. Dedication is the secret for distinction. How much dedicated you are to God and His Word will determine how much of shining you will enjoy this year. Man, dedicate your life and family to God. Let not this week pass before you make a vow for dedication this year.

    Wife, arise from your downcast position. The Word of God says: Arise and thresh, O daughter of Zion: for I will make thine horn iron, and I will make thy hoofs brass: and thou shalt beat in pieces many people: and I will consecrate their gain unto the LORD, and their substance unto the Lord of the whole earth (Micah 4:13). Don’t let spiritual laziness destroy or rob you of what God has planned for your life and home this year. Turn to the substance of the Word and stop chasing after shadows. You are born to shine; don’t die as a shadow. Make God your focus, and His Word your priority. Obey Him to the letter, and your life shall take a new turn.

    2.PHYSICALLY

    Arise; the Lord wants to do a new thing. Destroy the spirit of heaviness. Look straight ahead of you into this glorious year. That business deal that didn’t come through last year, that plan that never worked out last year, and that thing you couldn’t do last year because of finances, the Lord says: ‘Arise’, and see a better one done this year.’ Begin to make plans for a great year ahead of you. Root your plans in the Word of God, and take steps. Don’t just sit down. Instead, begin to see every of your plans this year, succeed.

    Therefore, arise and shine! The devil that could not hold you down from entering into this glorious year cannot stop you from shining. As a family- husband, wife and children, make godly plans in your finances, careers, academics, relationships, and seal it with the Word. God shall back you up, and every of your plans shall succeed.

    The Prophet of God, Bishop David Oyedepo, by the Spirit of God has declared 2016 as our year of moving From Glory to Glory. Therefore, see every of your plans this year succeed. Also see you and your family members showing forth the glory of God throughout the year. In your family, relationship, business, finance and career, your shinning shall be unending, in Jesus Mighty Name!

    For the singles, in case you believed God last year for a life partner and he/she didn’t come through. I want you to know that happened because this is the best year for you to be married.

    See a God-fearing, bona fide child of God come your way, and it shall happen suddenly. Arise from the dust of rejection, and let the glory of God fill your life this year. This is your year! The devil can’t stop it, he can’t damn it and he can’t do anything about it. Therefore, arise and shine

    Finally, serve God with your family this year. Service is the way to shining. Seek first the Kingdom of God, and every other thing shall be added to you (Matthew 6:33). Put God first in your family, and He shall put you first on the earth. Give God His place in your home, and He will give you a place on the earth. Serve Him with determination this year, and you cannot but shine.

    However, it takes God to shine in this wicked world. This is because you need to be born again in order to get what it takes to shine.  Being born again means to surrender your life to Jesus Christ; that is the first step to your shining. You can say this prayer and you shall be born again: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Becoming a help meet! (2)

    DEAR Reader, You are welcome to another wonderful time in God’s presence. I count it a great privilege to bring God’s Word your way again today. It is my prayer that your home and family will begin to experience the hand of God, and you shall have every cause to glorify the name of the Lord.

    I began this teaching last week by letting you know your position as a woman, in the life of your husband. In that teaching, I said that if you have the knowledge of your position, you will be able to carry out your role properly as a helpmeet. There is a purpose to which God created you as a woman: He wants you to stand strong in your God-ordained place in your husband’s life. You shall not fail in Jesus’ name! Today, I want to ask you this question: are you ‘Helping or Hurting?’

    As a wife, are you really helping your husband or hurting him? You know the answer yourself. You are meant to be a help that is meet. You are created to surround your man with aid and assistance. His life should be better as a result of his association with you. The Word of God says: And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him (Genesis 2:18). “Help” means “to surround” Therefore, a helpmeet implies one who “surrounds with aid and assistance.” God created the woman for the purpose of surrounding her man with aid and assistance. That is, assisting the man to put in place those things that might be missing in his life.

    As a wife, you know the things about your husband that nobody else does, because you know him to his closet. You know his nakedness, weakness and uprising.  You are, however, not to use that against him. Do not use his weaknesses against him, nor despise him for same, or seek opportunities to disgrace him in the public. Rather, as a helpmeet, you are to surround him with aid and assistance in those identified areas weakness. God wants you to help that man with all the spiritual, emotional and physical aid he requires.

    Be a helper and not a destroyer, an asset and not a liability, a blessing, not a burden, and a soothing balm, not a thorn in his flesh.  You know what a thorn does? It makes life uncomfortable, unbearable and causes pains. That is how some women are to their husbands- a grief of heart. Instead of assisting the man, they surround him with thorns and thistles. They have made marriage a bed of thorns, instead of roses. If that is what you have been to your husband, stop right now, and ask God to forgive you. It could be the reason you are experiencing calamites, instead of heaven’s refreshing in your home. Therefore, ask God to shut whatever door to your home that you may have opened to the devil through your nonchalance and neglect of wifely duties. As you do so, God will give you a new beginning and home, if you so desire. Also, ask God for the grace to constantly surround your husband with aid and assistance.

    You are to bring about a positive change in your husband’s life.  The difference in his life as a result of his marrying you should be glaring for all to see. It is your responsibility to help him attain to the great heights God has prepared for him.

    There is a pathetic story of Isaac and Rebecca in the Bible. Rebecca failed in her duty as Isaac’s helpmeet when she played an unpleasant role in the incidence of Jacob stealing Esau’s blessings.  Isaac was old and so could not see, because his eyes were dim.  Rebecca knew her husband’s weakness, but rather than complement him by helping him, she exploited the situation by “assisting” her son, Jacob, to steal Esau’s blessings, who is equally her son. What a hurt? It was Rebecca who initiated the idea of Jacob stealing Esau’s blessings.  Even when Jacob noted the loopholes in the plan, Rebecca still convinced Jacob to go ahead. Without her support, Jacob would not have been able to deceive Isaac and steal Esau’s blessings. She used her husband’s weakness against him and her son, Esau.

    Woman, have you observed the downward trend in your husband’s spiritual life, yet you don’t care? Rather than take positive steps, you run him down, tongue-lashing him and patting yourself on the back for being more “spiritual”? By so doing, you are treading on shaky ground, because very soon you will realize that the body cannot move when the head has been knocked off! Here is a testimony:

    “I have been married for the past ten years, and ever since, there was no peace in the home. For me, marriage wasn’t good. Things were just upside down. I had a child in 1993, and she died. I also had series of miscarriages. I used to drive a car, but it was no more. It was as if everything came to a halt.

    My husband started coming to Winners’ Chapel in January 1997.  He didn’t ask me to come with him, because I was already attending another Pentecostal church. Yet, there was no peace in the home. The situation worsened, and in June 1997, the tension was so high that I said, ‘Lord, what will I do?’ I told my husband, ‘If this is what marriage is all about, let us call it quit.’ He replied, ‘Well, the door is wide open.  You can go.’  It was then I sat down and did a rethink.

    I came to Winners’ Chapel in June, and began to hear the Bishop say, ‘I have been married for many years now, and there hasn’t been any concern or problem in my home.’ I said to myself, ‘Is it on this earth or on another planet?’

    But somehow, God has done it for me too! Now I know I had been the problem, not my husband. My husband is a perfect gentleman! The Bishop’s wife jokingly says if there was anything as another life, she would still choose to marry her husband. I too can joyfully say the same thing today!” – Neburabo, R.

    It takes salvation to experience a new beginning. If you desire to experience a new beginning in your family this year, you need to surrender your life to Jesus Christ. When you do so, He will give you the power you need to give positive contributions to your spouse. Please say this prayer in faith, and you shall be born again: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

     

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Becoming a help meet!

    DEAR Reader, HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU! This New Year will deliver unto you its full package in Jesus’ name. With great joy and happiness, I bring God’s Word your way this month, in this first edition for the year.  By the help of the Holy Spirit, I will be sharing with you on a topic: Becoming A Helpmeet. Today, I want to discuss on a subject I have titled: Knowing Your Position as a Helpmeet.

    It can be quite frustrating for a man to have a woman, who does not know where God has placed her in the home, and struggling to take the place of her husband.  Every woman needs to recognize her biblical position in her husband’s life. It is the lack of knowledge in this area that has robbed many homes of honour, dignity and success. The Word of God says: Therefore my people are gone into CAPTIVITY, because they have no knowledge: and their honourable men are famished, and their multitude dried up with thirst (Isaiah 5:13).

    The word “captivity” means to be stripped of honour and dignity. That shall not be your portion is Jesus mighty name!

    Several homes today have lost honour, because both the husband and wife are ignorant of their roles. As a woman, you are not inferior to the man. This is because in God’s unique plan, both men and women occupy unique and distinct positions. They are different, but complementary. A woman is uniquely different from her husband. As a matter of fact, she is the crown on her husband’s head. The Word of God says: A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones (Proverbs 12:4).  A crown is usually worn on the head. Likewise, a woman or wife is not to be trampled under feet, but to adorn her husband. The husband is the head and she is the ornament of beauty upon his head. The woman is skillfully crafted in order to give her husband his God-given place as head in the home.

    So many women today have left their position and are fighting to take their husband’s place as head in the home. They want to trample their husbands under foot. Want you to know that such wives will soon be displaced, as they can’t take their husband’s place, no matter how beautiful, more educated or trained from a better family background, they may be.

    The problem of many women today is pride. So many women find it difficult to submit to their husband, not to talk of respecting him. The Word of God says: Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall (Proverbs 16:18). I want you to know that pride is the number one destroyer of peace, harmony, love, joy and fulfillment in many homes and marriages, today. The Word of God says: But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble (James 4:6). Many homes have been destroyed through feminine pride. Woman, that high look, secret pride, arrogant talk, nagging spirit and the like, it is not from God. You just have to stop it, if you desire success in your marriage! Below is a testimony that was share by a woman:

    “Some time in 1990, my husband lost his job and from then, our struggles started. Later, a sister in Christ gave me some money to start a business. Since then, I began to ignore the teachings of Bishop Oyedepo and his wife on pride. I no longer respected my husband. I insulted him whenever he talked to me, because I was the one fending for the family. He began to complain of the way I talked to him, saying that there was no sign to show that I was born again, and that I was behaving like one of the worldly women.

    But yesterday, I came for the International Women Convention, where I heard a teaching on the use of the tongue. I learnt how to speak correctly to my husband, and regretted the indecent ways I had treated him in the past. On reaching home, I knelt down to greet him and he was surprised, because I had not done that before. There and then, he believed that something good would come out of the convention.

    Formerly, whenever he wanted us to have our morning prayers, I would shun him and tell him to say his own prayers that I would pray whenever it pleased me. But the following morning, I was the one who woke him and the children up for prayers.” – Omotosho, O.

    In the husband-wife relationship, submission is the major key that opens the door to peace, joy, harmony, excitement and success in marriage. Submission can be instrumental in effecting changes in the home, as there is no man that would not respond positively to a submissive wife. The Word of God says: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord (Colossians 3:18). That means it is a commandment from the Almighty God for a woman to submit herself to her own husband.  A wife’s submission to her husband should be absolute; that is what God demands. You may have been submitting in some areas, but not in all, and probably say, “But God knows I am trying my best.” But that is not what the Lord has commanded you to do. The Word of God says: For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all (James 2:10). So, your submission has to be absolute!

    Submission may be the missing axe-head that is responsible for the problems in your home. Once you put it in order, your husband will not stop loving you as God has commanded. There is no woman who does not desire to be loved by her husband. However, you can only reap a harvest of love, when you sow the seed of submission. I have discovered that the more I stand in my God-ordained place in my husband’s life, the more love comes my way from him.  Everyone close to us knows that my husband loves me, but frankly, I want more love.  So, I stand firmly in my place, and keep surrounding him with aid and assistance.

    You need the grace of God to play your role in the life of your husband, and that grace is available in Christ Jesus. If you want that grace, please say this prayer and Christ Jesus shall come into your life: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • This lady needs N10.95m to avert looming death

    EVERY breath that 37-year-old Akuwa Joy Adejo takes draws her closer to the grave. Akuwa Joy may be counting her days on earth. Unless she obtains the sum of N10.95 million ($55, 000) and undergoes a liver transplant as well as umbilical surgery booked for India on before January 15, she will be totally drained of life.

    Akuwa, a single woman with no child and a Bachelors of Education (B.Edu (Economics)) holder based in Lagos, until her sickness owned a Coutre because she could not secure a job.

    Ms Akuwa is not given to idleness.  She was diagnosed with umbilical hernia and liver failure. She requires liver transplant as well as umbilical surgery to correct the swelling which often leaves her wreathing in pains.

    Akuwa, even in her weak state, is doing everything within her might to clutch to life, including taking to the social media through the address, https://www.gofundme.com/m4c5qfa7 and her Facebook Wall, Akuwa Adejo to market her merchandise. In her own little way, she is also sourcing for funds for her operation.

    Are you moved to assist? Do reach out through her GSM number 08138421992 or pay into her account with GTBank: Akuwa Joy Adejo, a/c no. 0128095253.

    Her family, a close-knit one, has spent much on her upkeep and is still spending, but the family members cannot afford the huge cost required to keep her alive. The family’s gallant efforts have yielded results so far as Akuwa has been evaluated by an India-based hospital, and were told the requirements in financial terms and organ donation.

    They learnt that their daughter could not be cut open twice  for the surgeries with very short breaks in between. The doctors advised to have the two surgeries done at the same time.

    Her brother has agreed to donate (a part of) his liver. A member of the family will also be travelling with the two to look after them following the surgical procedure.

    The required cost of N10.95m  or $55,000 is inclusive of the surgery, accommodation, air tickets and travel arrangements.

    Akuwa has until Januay 15 to get these surgeries done. The last time she went to India, the doctors told her that her liver performed below five percent of capacity.

    As a matter of fact, Akuwa has less than one month to perform the surgeries and prevent the premature consequence of death

  • Setting the pace for the season (2)

    HELLO Reader, Compliments of the season to you in the mighty name of Jesus Christ! Without any doubt, I know that the Lord has done so much for you this year. Are you thankful to Him for all His benefits that you have enjoyed this year? Some of which are the gift of life, the benefit of forgiveness, protection, provisions, redemption, so on and so forth!

    Last week, I explained spiritual clean-up as doing away with those things that will destroy your joy, at this holy season of the birth of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. That is the major purpose of this month’s teaching: setting the pace for the season by doing away with those things that may cause hindrance from getting the joy and the spirit of the season into your family. In today’s edition, I shall be teaching on Physical Clean-Up!

    What do I mean by physical clean-up? It is cleaning up your wardrobe in hospitality, reaching out to the needy and also to clean out your home environment. Hospitality simply means a friendly, generous reception and entertainment of guests or strangers, especially in one’s own home. For you to set the pace for the season, you need to give room to hospitality in your home and that will eventually attract angelic visitation. The Word of God Says: Use hospitality one to another without grudging (1 Peter 4:9), Distributing to the necessity of saints; given to hospitality (Romans 12:13).

    It is a known fact that when the angels of God are sent to minister to the heirs of salvation, they are there to defend, provide and generally minister to you. So, when you are hospitable, you end up welcoming them into your home without knowing. The Word of God says: Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares (Hebrews 13:2). I don’t know what you have been trusting God for, but I know that as you take heed to the Word of God coming your way today, the God of the season shall visit you in the name of Jesus. Abraham and Sarah entertained angels, and the spirit of barrenness was terminated via that visitation. I see God visiting you too! Husband and wife, it is your duty to both give your home to hospitality, especially this Christmas season. Abraham and Sarah made the visitors feel welcomed, relaxed and refreshed. By their hospitality, they received their son, Isaac!

    We also have the story of the Shunammite woman in 2 Kings, who welcomed the prophet of God into her home and her barrenness was terminated. In that account, she told her husband: Let us make a little chamber, I pray thee, on the wall; and let us set for him there a bed, and a table, and a stool, and a candlestick: and it shall be, when he cometh to us, that he shall turn in thither. And it fell on a day, that he came thither, and he turned into the chamber, and lay there (2 Kings 4:10-11). There are many women today who don’t even want to see their husband’s relatives in their homes, not to mention a stranger. Their facial expressions can put off a stranger from their homes. The Word of God says: And he said to Gehazi his servant, Call this Shunammite. And when he had called her, she stood before him. And he said unto him, Say now unto her, Behold, thou hast been careful for us with all this care; what is to be done for thee? And when he had called her, she stood in the door. And he said, About this season, according to the time of life, thou shalt embrace a son. And the woman conceived, and bare a son at that season that Elisha had said unto her, according to the time of life (2 Kings 4:12-17).

    I often encourage women to always be hospitable, both at home and outside. One of the women in our church testified of how a visitor came to their house and did not have enough money to return to his station. He belonged to another branch of the church. She told him her husband was out of town and the money he left wasn’t enough for them. She, however, sold some food stuff and gave him the money. Before the man left, he made some prophetic utterances and said that God would surprise her. The following week, God began to visit their home with money, materials and foodstuff as never before! Their home, where there was not enough previously, suddenly, became a place of abundance! What a time of visitation!

    Hospitality brings honour and increase. Whatever level you may have attained in life, increase is still possible, and hospitality is the way! Those who give never surfer want in life. Also remember that your giving can yield returns, and it will come in a hundred-fold. Sometimes, hospitality may not be convenient, but as you sow in tears, God ensures that you reap in joy. The Word of God says: They that sow in tears shall reap in joy. He that goeth forth and weepeth, bearing precious seed, shall doubtless come again with rejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him (Psalm 126:5-6). Never give in to fear of being impoverished if you feed the needy, because givers never lack and you will always have more than enough to eat and give to others.

    I want to use this opportunity to also encourage the singles to be hospitable. Singles who are hospitable will certainly welcome their life partners unaware. Are you believing God for a life partner? How hospitable are you? May God grant you understanding! The joy of having a life partner can be yours if you will add a touch of friendliness and hospitality to your life. Rebecca is a perfect example of hospitality. When Abraham’s servant came to Mesopotamia to take a wife for Isaac, he prayed to God, saying: And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac (Genesis 24:14). Abraham’s servant knew that Isaac belonged to a family that is addicted to hospitality; so, he prayed for a kind and hospitable wife for Isaac. He knew that any woman who would offer water to a stranger and his camels would be a hospitable person.

    The criteria for his choice were not possessions, height, beauty or education; instead, they were a warm and loving heart. If you are married, it may be your hospitality response to your spouse that drew the two of you together. No one will like to marry an unapproachable, unloving or unfriendly person. So, to continue to enjoy this honour and acceptance, you must continue to be hospitable.

    However, without the grace of God available to you, you cannot be hospitable, and to access that grace, you need to be born again. That means to accept Jesus as your Lord and Saviour. If you want to do so, say this prayer of faith: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

     

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Making a change in your problematic children (3)

    DEAR Reader, You are welcome to another time with Family Forum. By the Word of God, you have been exposed to what steps to take in making a change in your problematic children. I believe you are taking those steps already. You shall no longer experience problem in the lives of your children in Jesus’ precious name!

    Last week, I taught on the solutions to rejection. Today, I want to discuss the topic: Children are a Blessing. Before you begin to bring forth those wonderful children, I would like to enlighten you on whom they are. For those of you, who are already having children, I want you to know that children are not a burden, but blessings. It is my prayer that your eyes will be opened to this truth, in Jesus’ precious name. Perhaps your quiver is not full of them yet, it is not late at all. Sit and relax; you are on course.

    God is about showing you something new from His Word because His Word is new every day. You shall not have regrets over your children! The Bible says: Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate (Psalm 127:3-5).

    This scripture says, “Lo” which could be replaced with “behold” or in modern day English: “look here” or “pay attention because it is very important and crucial” children are the heritage of the Lord. The word “heritage” also means inheritance or blessings. Children are gifts from God; they are blessings to the family, and are unique blends of their parents. It is important for parents to understand that children are given to us as part of our heritage; they are part of our inheritance in Christ Jesus.

    Therefore, parents must see them as part of their heritage from the Almighty God. In case you don’t have them yet, begin to imagine them as part of your blessings in Christ because they are on their way. God has pronounced you fruitful. As long as you are a child of God, you are entitled to the blessings of children. No matter what the doctors have diagnosed as being responsible for the delay in your child bearing, God is greater than that report.

    Reading that Scripture again, “Children are an heritage of the Lord…” God is the giver of children. He gives them to you to oversee, take care of and bring them up in His fear all the days of their lives. When you receive them as the heritage and blessings of God, then God’s purpose for sending them to you is manifested. So, from today, refuse to see them as burdens in your life. They are not burdens but your blessings and heritage from God.

    There are quite a number of parents who see their children as another burden. When the children do something wrong, instead of standing up to their own responsibilities, they look at that child as burdensome and troublesome. Your perspective in life determines your focus and interest. Somebody once said: your perspective in life picks your interest. The Bible also says: For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7). Also the Scripture says: Moreover the word of the Lord came unto me, saying, Jeremiah, what seest thou? And I said, I see a rod of an almond tree. Then said the Lord unto me, Thou hast well seen: for I will hasten my word to perform it (Jeremiah 1:11-12).

    When you see a child as a burden in your life, that child will truly be a burden to you. Children are blessings from God. I want you to change your perspective about your children. Therefore, always see and look at them with your spiritual eyes as blessings from the Lord. The Word of God says: The blessing of the Lord, it maketh rich, and he addeth no sorrow with it (Proverbs 10:22).

    Considering the above Scripture, God does not want to bring sorrow to your life through your children. I also want to let you know that God is not a liar. The Word of God says: God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good? (Numbers 23:19). He will make His Word good in your life. If you have ever experienced sorrow over your children, I believe God that that will be the last you will ever experience in Jesus’ name.

    Maybe you have children that are problematic or they are like “thorns” in your flesh. Today, I pray that God’s power will reach them. No matter how troublesome they are, God will turn their lives around for good in Jesus’ mighty name. Children are the heritage and blessings of the Lord, and God’s blessings always make rich and add no sorrow. Therefore, every form of barrenness or challenges over your children comes to an end right now in Jesus’ name!

    Look at verse 4 of the introductory Scripture which says: As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of thy youth. An arrow for the mighty man is an asset not a burden. It’s a blessing to him, not a burden, so also are the children. In other words, children are assets, they are blessings. Verse 5 also says: Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate. God wants you to enjoy your children for they are meant to be blessings indeed: they are to make you happy and not to sorrow.

    Well, dear reader, what has been your experience? Are your children blessings indeed, or a burden to you? The Bible tells us to constantly examine ourselves, and make amendments. Which of these two categories is operational in your life now? Is it the positive or the negative one? Examine your children. If they are a blessing to you, you will not sorrow over them, the spice that they have added to your home will not turn sour! They have been a blessing, and won’t turn to burdens for you! Blessings are God’s addition; they will not diminish! Also, if they have been otherwise, it’s my prayer that God’s mighty Hand will come upon them. Every hard-heartedness gives way right now. God, Who has purposed them to be blessings, will cause you to rejoice over them. Great shall be their peace. Your dream of Heaven on Earth over your children this year shall be a reality. You shall not miss it in Jesus’ mighty name!

    To access this blessing, you need to accept Jesus, Who sets free by giving your life to Him as you say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and Satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).

     

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).