Category: Feminique

Our Reporter

THERAPIES. While stress doesn’t appear to cause headaches, it can act as a trigger for headaches or make a headache worse. Depression and other mental health disorders also can play a role. For these situations, your doctor may recommend one or more behavior therapies, such as:

• Relaxation training. Relaxation techniques include deep breathing, yoga, meditation and progressive muscle relaxation, in which you tense one muscle at a time. Then you completely release the tension, until every muscle in the body is relaxed. An older child can learn relaxation techniques in classes or at home using books or videos.
• Biofeedback training. Biofeedback teaches your child to control certain body responses that help reduce pain. During a biofeedback session, your child is connected to devices that monitor and give feedback on body functions, such as muscle tension, heart rate and blood pressure.

Your child then learns how to reduce muscle tension and slow his or her heart rate and breathing. The goal of biofeedback is to help your child enter a relaxed state to better cope with pain.

• Cognitive behavioral therapy. This therapy can help your child learn to manage stress and reduce the frequency and severity of headaches. During this type of talk therapy, a counselor helps your child learn ways to view and cope with life events more positively.

Lifestyle and home remedies

OTC pain medications, such as acetaminophen (Tylenol, others) and ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin, others), are usually effective in reducing headache pain. Before giving your child pain medication, keep these points in mind:

• Read labels carefully and use only the dosages recommended for your child.
• Don’t give doses more frequently than recommended.
• Don’t give your child OTC pain medication more than two or three days a week. Daily use can trigger a medication overuse headache, a type of headache caused by overuse of pain medications.
• Use caution when giving aspirin to children or teenagers. Though aspirin is approved for use in children older than age 3, children and teenagers recovering from chickenpox or flu-like symptoms should never take aspirin. This is because aspirin has been linked to Reye’s syndrome, a rare but potentially life-threatening condition, in such children. Talk to your doctor if you have concerns.
  

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In addition to OTC pain medications, the following can help ease your child’s headache:

• Rest and relaxation. Encourage your child to rest in a dark, quiet room. Sleeping often resolves headaches in children.
• Use a cool, wet compress. While your child rests, place a cool, wet cloth on his or her forehead.
• Offer a healthy snack. If your child hasn’t eaten in a while, offer a piece of fruit, whole-wheat crackers or low-fat cheese. Not eating can make headaches worse.

Alternative medicine

Although they haven’t been well studied, a number of dietary supplements have been suggested to help children’s headaches, including:

• Riboflavin•Magnesium•Coenzyme Q10
• Vitamin D•Melatonin

Check with your child’s doctor before trying any herbal products or dietary supplements to be sure they won’t interact with your child’s medicine or have harmful side effects.

Several alternative treatments may also be helpful for headaches in children, including:

• Acupuncture. Acupuncture practitioners use extremely thin, disposable needles that generally cause little pain or discomfort. Some research has suggested that this treatment may help relieve headache symptoms.

By VERA CHIDI-MAHA

HAPPY New year to you all! Hope you all had a restful holiday season? Today, we want to consider how the western life has, in more ways than one, influenced and affected our marital lives, especially when it comes to clamouring for privacy in marriages.

Please, read on…

Marriage is a very sensitive institution. In marriage, every little thing matters. From the way spouses welcome each other back home after a hard day’s job to the way they say good night. From the way wives and husbands address each other to an issue as minute as thanking each other after a meal. A man ought to shower his spouse with compliments, making her feel like a queen at times.

In return, a woman should always treat her man as if he is the only man in the room; treating him like; ‘oh king! Live forever! Those little gestures go a long way to spicing a marriage. But the focus of this piece is on the ideal way for couples to sleep; whether it is desirable for them to share the same bedroom.

Sharing the marital bedroom and sleeping on the conjugal bed is usually an important part of my idea for a perfect marriage. Ironically, however, things are fast changing because, according to a research finding, some couples who have healthy and loving marriages do not even share the same bedroom, yet they are happy.

A particular claim that the reason why they sleep better is because they share separate bedrooms, sharing a bed with someone who snores, has restless legs, brings work or food to bed and watches the TV till the early hours is difficult. To have a good night sleep is not only essential for a person’s well-being, but it can also reduce the daily tensions that a couple could find themselves enveloped in.

A person who has had a refreshing night sleep is ready to face the day in a good mood and cope easily with the everyday vicissitude.

Another reason why couples sleep in separate bedrooms is that it affords them the privilege of breaking the routine. Having separate rooms allows the couple to be in need of each other, making the time together more enjoyable. The scenario painted is that it should not just be a matter of a wife going to her spouse’s room for a ‘quickie’.

No, it means the wife would start thinking about how to go about it; how to lure her partner to her room. You prepare yourself for the encounter you bathe, shave, cream, perfume; it becomes like a date where you want to look your best to leave a long-lasting impression.

Another surprising reason given by couples sleeping in separate bedrooms, according to the research finding, is that it gives them the opportunity to recover some of the freedom of being single.

They claim that having your own private space can make you recover your own self since you don’t need to think about the other person when you are there. (But is this not risky?) They also claim that having a private space at home could be very relaxing.

Read Also: My body no be wood or stone; Sex-starved wife tells court

Respecting each other’s taste and having the opportunity to decorate their own rooms to taste is also a form of love. (Really?) They also claim that having separate bedrooms makes them love each other the more. Staying is separate rooms has become to them a pleasure, not an obligation. You sleep with your partner because you want to.

However, sleeping in separate rooms leads to the disappearance of spontaneous sexual encounters. You should sleep in the same room with your partner whether he or she snores or not; that is why it is called marriage; it is a union, be reminded that it is ‘for better for worse’, besides, physical connection is very key in marriage.

Cuddles, touches, companionship etc. should come naturally and not only when one of the spouses feels for such. Sometimes, sleeping separately could lead to problems in marriage. This can be the case when partners are avoiding spending time together or having different expectations.

According to Weiner-Davis, a marriage and family therapist and author of ‘The Sex Starved Marriage’, ‘if couples are sleeping apart all the time, it can create problems; if one person thinks that isn’t how a marriage should be, it’s a problem.

Clinical psychologist Dr. Joy Browne says ‘Sleeping together is important because it is about being together as a couple, it is a statement of compromise and also gives one the chance to at least cuddle, and there is that closeness. Pepper Schwartz agrees that couples who find each other moving apart may have ‘a troubled relationship’.

Generally speaking, married couples may find sleeping in separate beds or separate rooms an effective way to handle different sleep patterns, snoring or tending to young children. Partners must ensure that communication lines and intimacy are not negatively impacted by the separate sleeping arrangements. I encourage married couples to sleep together on same bed in same room. As a matter of fact, many marriage experts believe that sleeping together could keep a marriage healthy.

Couples should do whatever makes their relationships work. Some people like to sleep with the lights on, while some like to sleep with the lights off or at least a little dim, this is where the issue of compromise comes in.

For most couples who sleep apart; it is practical decision. They know they will never get to sleep with their partners in the bed due to snoring, restless legs or opposing schedules, many couples have submitted that rather than suffer through the effects of sleep deprivation, separate bedrooms allow them the opportunity to rest well.

In my growing up years, I saw my parents share the same bed all through. We lived in a three bedroom apartment; I never saw them or heard them suggest sleeping separately, no matter what. I conclude by asking again: Is separate bedrooms for a husband and wife a good thing?

In the past few years, a number of women have made significant strides in business especially in the small and Medium scale sector. There are still a number of opportunities and that was precisely the focus of a recent program by women in renewable energy (WIRE-A) tagged Increasing your sustainable earning through ‘Greenprenuership’ in Lagos recently. Experts and stakeholders in the sector took turns to talk about the potentials, achievements and the challenges for women. Yetunde Oladeinde reports

ENERGY is vital for the survival of any business, Unfortunately, this has been very difficult for many and it increases the cost of production, making good proceed by Nigerians more expensive and almost unaffordable. How can women and other business owners get out of the energy woods? The President of WIRE-A, Chief Anita Nana Okuribido, who has worked in the sector for years, has started to seek viable options because she believes that the solution is in sight. “The promotion of women’s empowerment through the Green Energy access is also important. We need to place a lot of emphasis on women’s energy needs and corresponding economic benefits. What we need are new opportunities for Sustainable development, good income generation, national economic growth, as well as increase in the number of women owned businesses in Africa. When there is electricity, a lot of businesses would spring up.”

Energy technologies, Okuribido explained, reduces the drudgery of traditional household work. “I have worked in a community in Benue state where the women wake up in the morning and have to walk for about 5km to go and fetch wood and water. I would then look at how tired they are when they come back. Yet, they would still have to cook for the family. Thereafter, they would go to the farm and all through the day, the women are just working and they don’t have any time to rest. Sadly, they have no money at the end of the day. They have worked day and night, but there is nothing to show for it.’

To take women to a better level, it is important to increase the earning power of our women, men and youth. “We should also increase family education, through electricity, improved health through efficient energy sources.”

Community based women and children empowerment, Okuribido said are the major priority of her organisation. “We are very concerned about the amount of time women and youths spend collecting firewood and water. This deprives them of sustainable opportunities. Unfortunately, the number of women owned businesses in the rural community is decreasing rapidly. This brings a burden and the impact of lack of income and poverty for many. On our priority list, we would like to establish community based organisations to bring about the change in areas like Asese and Ibara. This would increase the sustainable income of the rural dwellers through their occupational clusters.”

Okuribido adds: “We need more women to have access to energy supply and in order to achieve this, we must help them with access to finance, technology, quality education and capacity building through CBOs.”

The energy expert goes on to talk about the organisation’s initiative targeting one child and one solar lamp, which would help every child read with ease.” We started the one child one solar lamp initiative with the children of Seat of Wisdom School located in Mende community in Lagos, by catching them young.”

Talking about the improved energy options for lighting, efficient stoves and the solar kiosk which she stressed would change the narratives in many communities. “Here the women can do so many things like a salon, viewing center and everyone can be here at night. I strongly believe that this is the time for all stakeholders to take the bull by the horn.”

On his part, the director of Indonesian Trade Promotion Center (ITC), Mr Bagus Wickasena, opined that the role of women is very important in the economy. They are the most important pillars in the economy. Collaborations,  working  with  government  as well as  the  external  issues  that  would  affect  business  are some of the things he advised  participants to pay great attention to.

“This is important because   the government would eventually bring empowerment for women. Indonesia has a strong commitment to the sector in 2020 with 21 percent support. This commitment was made by our president in Copenhagen. In Indonesia we have so many councils and communities. They are professional and climate change councils.”

Next he goes on to buttress his point with a short video clip on the initiative of Tri Munpuni, a female entrepreneur in Indonesia.

She talked extensively about the opportunities and challenges for women and their communities, as well as the importance of tapping into the needs of the community to make a difference. It also showed how collaborative efforts can transform communities.”

For her this is the way she pays back God’s privileges. “We have so many communities that do not have access to electricity. Many young people assist their parents in the farmland and they need to study in the night time but electricity is a problem.”

So, she used the renewable energy opportunities to empower the people through training, as well as collaboration with government. The funds received is also used to improve the local infrastructures to ensure sustainable power through  greenprenuership.

So, of the takeaways from the clip is the increase of women’s engagement in the sector, tuning to National priorities, looking beyond access to finance, access to technology business skills training, as well as creating an ecosystem for stakeholders.

For Ms Doyin Fadipe, CEO of Genesis Energy, there are so many opportunities for women in the sector.  “Renewable energy, he stressed, is one opportunity that needs to be harnessed to reduce the high rate of unemployment in the country.  I am passionate about capacity building, whether you are a man or a woman. As you empower women, it is important to empower all the people who fall under their sphere of influence. I believe in empowering from the perspective of renewable energy.  You need to open your eyes and see that within the renewable energy space, you can have a future. That way you would build a sustainable enterprise irrespective of your background.

Admonishing the youth’s to have a better focus, she tells the story of a 16 year old environmental activist.  “She is a young girl who has autism; she has disabilities and psychological disability which means she cannot focus properly. She can go for days and act mute.  But she found something that she was passionate about at age nine.  That was the environment and about two years ago she went and sat in front of the Parliament in Sweden because she found out that we are in the 6th mould of extinction of the world.”

Renewable Energy, she stressed, came up as a result of the challenges the Climate was causing due to the damages that had been going on for years. So, she found out as a child that if something is not done about it, all the adults would go and we would go into a world where there is fire, chaos and all that. So, she sat down in front of the parliament and didn’t do anything. A year later, she led the biggest movement on climate change, with 11 million children joining in from all over the world. This is a 16 year old girl suffering a chronic disability.“

Fadipe also talked about another determined youth, this time around a young man from South Africa originally, but he got the nationality of two or three other countries. “He schooled abroad, dropped out at some point and then he started his entrepreneurship journey at the age of 24 years. Today he owns one of the largest and most credible tech companies in the world. These are just normal human beings but they have the opportunity of knowledge. Some just decided to empower themselves. They didn’t wait for anyone to do it. They did it because they had something in them that made them say I want to do it. My message to you is that you can do whatever you want, if you have the interest.”

Innovation and business development, she informed are the basic requirements to excel in the sector. “These are the two main pillars that would catapult your knowledge. You must develop yourself, be independent and be able to provide for yourself and your family. We are living in a time where there is a lot of automation, things are changing. The concept of employment is going out of fashion and you find that in most developing world, a lot of young people are not waiting for people to hire them”.

Fadipe continued: “They are looking to find ways to provide something that the next person needs. That is innovation. Once you understand the background of renewable Energy space, you can begin to think of innovation. We all have the ability to do this. Innovation for me is a new idea, creative thoughts, and new imaginations in form of device or methods. You can go to bed thinking of a problem and wake up with solutions but they never did anything about it. It doesn’t take anything to innovate. It just needs you to be sensitive to your environment and think about how to solve that problem. I encourage you all to have that mindset all the time”.

Chief Mrs Alaba Lawson’s support and contributions in the sector was recognized with the Green award.