The Nation Newspaper

Tag: marriage

  • Court dissolves 3-year-old marriage over frequent fighting

    An Ado-Ekiti Customary Court on Friday dissolved the three-year-old marriage between Mr Mayowa Ogunrinde and his wife, Busayo, over frequent fighting and disrespect for in-laws.
    The petitioner, Ogunrinde, 35, a civil servant, also told the court that his wife has no respect for him.

    “ Most of the time, I do all the domestic chores while my wife will always watch me.’’

    The petitioner told the court that the respondent was fond of slapping him whenever there was a misunderstanding between both of them.

    He claimed that though he fulfilled all his financial responsibilities as a husband, he always went hungry, as his wife would never fulfill her duties in the kitchen.

    The petitioner pleaded with the court to grant his application for dissolution of his 3-year-old marriage to Busayo, to enable him enjoy peace of mind.

    He prayed the court to award the custody of their daughter to Busayo, but with a clause that he would take custody once she turned six years.

    One of the petitioner’s witnesses, Mrs Mary Oluyemi, 60, told the court that she, on several occasions tried to settle the dispute between the petitioner and the respondent without any success.

    Busayo, severally served with court summons was absent in court.

    President of the court, Mr Joseph Ogunsemi, after listening to the petitioner and his witnesses, said that the marriage had broken down irretrievably and consequently dissolved the marriage.

    ‎He awarded the custody of the only child of the marriage to the respondent for proper care until the child turns six years.

    Ogunsemi also ordered the petitioner to be paying N2,000 as monthly feeding allowance of the child‎ through the court’s registrar, effective from May,2017 for onward delivery to the respondent.

    He ruled that the petitioner would be responsible for the education of the child at all levels, besides medical bills.

    The president granted the petitioner unrestricted ‎access to the child‎.

  • Mercy Aigbe’s marriage saga: We’ll pursue case to logical conclusion -Lagos Govt

    Mercy Aigbe’s marriage saga: We’ll pursue case to logical conclusion -Lagos Govt

    The Lagos State Government has secured a restraining order for Nollywood actress, Mercy Aigbe from any further abuse by her husband, Lanre Gentry.

    Lagos State Commissioner for Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation, Mrs. Lola Akande, and Coordinator of Domestic and Sexual Violence Response Team (DSVRT), Mrs. Titilola Vivour-Adeniyi, who spoke with our reporter on Wednesday said the order henceforth prevents Mr. Gentry from getting close to his wife until further notice, assuring that the government would pursue the case to a logical conclusion.

    Akande who commended the courage of Aigbe for voicing out her ordeal, urged other women going through similar situation to come out and voice out their plight.

    “I must commend the courage of mercy, because what she did is what other women who are victims of domestic violence out there need to do, they don’t need to hide it except they want to die there.”

    The visibly angry commissioner said it was so disheartening to see the state Aigbe was when she came to her office to report the case, “she was coughing blood from her nose and mouth and she had injury on her face which the doctor said she must have an operation.

    “I was so angry that I needED to see the face of the man that did this to her, and so we invited him and he came yesterday (Tuesday) to say his own side of the story to the official in charge of domestic violence but any man that can beat a woman to a pulp like that to the extent that she is still coughing blood one week after the incident needs to have his head examined.

    “I asked him what if they do something like this to your sister or even to your child how will you feel? He said she offended him, but is that why he must kill her? Can’t they settle scores like adults?” She asked.

    She said the government has currently involved their legal team adding than soon, a legal action will be taken regarding the case.

    Vivour-Adeniyi, on his part said Mr. Gentry may be charged for domestic violence, adding that he is also expected to appear in court in two weeks’ time to give reasons why the restraining order should not be made perpetual.

    The DSVRT Coordinator said the State Governor, Mr. Akinwunmi Ambode was committed to stemming the tide of domestic violence, regardless of who the victim or the offender is, saying that Mercy Aigbe is yet another victim which would be treated according to the law.

    She said, “We are actually working on the case with the Ministry of Women Affairs and Poverty Alleviation (WAPA), we are handling both civil and criminal. The criminal aspect of the domestic violence has been reported to the DPO of Area F and we accompanied her to the station with a view to charging the criminal aspect to court. So that is being handled.

    “The civil aspect which is to ensure that she is protected, that is where the restraining order comes in, which is provided by the Prevention Against Domestic Violence Law 2007. So, we approached the family court and we got a restraining order on her behalf, restraining Mr. Gentry from I think one mile from her.

    She said the Police was handling the criminal aspect of the case. “The police are investigating and they are supposed to charge him to court for prosecution”.

    She urged other victims suffering domestic violence from abusive partners to approach a court to seek a restraining order, noting that the State Government through the DSVRT in most cases intervenes on behalf of a victim even when such is reported by an anonymous person.

    “Don’t forget that domestic violence is a crime and a crime is committed against the state. So, the state can come in, conduct investigation and can actually approach the family court for a restraining order. The law actually encourages busy body to act on behalf of victims of domestic violence, knowing well that most times victims of domestic violence don’t want to come forward, so peradventure of the law, the State has the ability to approach the family court on behalf of the victim, just to ensure that the victim is safe.

    “The restraining order is not necessarily to criminalise or to punish, but to protect, because don’t forget that most times even when the victim leaves the abusive relationship, if she is walking on the street, she is still hovering round and checking if anybody is following her or stalking her and most times the perpetrator might have threatened to kill her, so the restraining order is to protect her, her surroundings, her children if any or her properties, that is the main aim of the restraining order, it is so powerful but people don’t know that they can literally walk into the court and get that restraining order,” Vivour-Adeniyi explained.

  • Rekindling the fire of love in your Marriage! (5)

    Rekindling the fire of love in your Marriage! (5)

    Dear Reader,

    You are welcome to another exciting time in the presence of the Lord. Love, like I said last week, is the key factor that sustains a Christian marriage. But could it still be, considering the fact that the hot romance in your relationship is fading away, and it’s becoming a concern to you?

    That is why, this week, it is necessary for me to share with you the basic idea that will help you to rekindle that “fire of love” in your marriage. That is what I call Good and Healthy Romance!

    A healthy romance between a husband and wife makes for a healthy marriage relationship. Romance is a great facilitator of a successful marriage. When marriage stops being romantic, it starts to suffer devastation. The moment you stop desiring your spouse, you are already falling apart from each other. At that point, there is the need for a rekindling. Unfortunately, however, this is where many Christians run into problems.

    Paul speaking in the Book of 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 says: Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

    From the above verses of the Bible, “rendering due benevolence” means to give one another the benefit of marriage, which is your body. God placed in man a sexual desire, which should only be satisfied in marriage. That way, the desire will not be destructive.

    But the big question is: why have so many couples denied themselves of this truth? This is where, I believe, some Christians have opened the door to trouble in their marriages.  The man is not available for his wife, so she looks somewhere else. The wife is not available for the man, so he goes somewhere else, because the burning must be satisfied.

    The Bible says you mustn’t allow your abstinence go beyond a time. Nobody fasts for one year.  Even Jesus, the Messiah of the world, only fasted 40 days.  The significance of this is that you are not permitted, under whatever reason, to separate from each other for more than 40 days maximum, lest satan tempts you.

    To tell your wife today, “I am waiting on the Lord”, tomorrow, “I am waiting on the Lord”, next week, “I am waiting on the Lord.” When you finish ‘waiting’, you may not find her there again. That is why most crises in marriages, today, develop out of sexual tension.

    Romance in marriage is one of the areas you must intelligibly manage, because it reinforces the marriage covenant. Take time out with your spouse to go for a dinner date or a picnic in a secluded area away from home. Catch some fun with each other occasionally, like going to the beach or watching programmes of choice alone together. Create time for each other to reminisce happy moments; this will help to spice up a lukewarm marriage.

    Having the fear of God resident will also help you spice up your marriage with good romance, instead of finding satisfaction outside the marriage. You can operate in the fear of God cheaply, if you have accepted Christ as your Lord and personal Saviour. Peradventure you haven’t, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship(John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • JULIET IBRAHIM: Stop judging us on crashed marriages

    Ghanaian actress, Juliet Ibrahim, who has been able to make a name for herself both home and abroad, has so many things going for her as an entertainer and I  find it extremely selfish for a man to meet a woman in a certain career path and ask her to quit, just to please him

    TELL us, what brought about the concept behind the eye lashes?

    Wearing eyelash extensions is one of the biggest beauty trends these days if you agree. It gives you that ‘wow’ factor because it accentuates your eyes, makes it appear sexier and brings out its beauty and when your eyes look beautiful, you look and feel gorgeous; basically boosting your self-confidence.

    I get complimented on my look anytime I wear false eye lashes and people ask how they can get my look so that’s what led to the birth of Shades by Juliet Ibrahim. My lashes is quite different from the rest out there because they look almost 100% natural and curly that when worn it will hardly be noticeable that one is wearing falsies. I have 20 unique styles to suit every woman and they are affordable.

    How long has it been in plan, and did you know it was going to sell this fast?

    I executed it as soon as the thought came about and I knew it would sell because they are made with love and with the idea that I had to create various types to suit every lady out there who wants to wear lashes and still feel and appear like she isn’t putting on any at all.

    Being a celebrity, how easy is it for you to have time for personal projects?

    In the course of our business, one learns time management. You know how to allot time for whatsoever and you make it work.

    How is your Foundation faring?

    With the help of my awesome team, we are getting by but there’s always room for improvement and we strive to get to our desired aim soon.

    With such huge project that requires funds, how have you been managing the team that work with you?

    Yes, you can say that again, we need funding to make the Foundation work the way it should but we aren’t there yet. Thankfully, the Juliet Ibrahim Foundation team understands this and we work together for a common purpose and we are able to do that successfully without looking out for or expecting monetary gain for ourselves.

    With a good cause for humanitarian work, how did you feel when people lashed out at you, during the case of late OJB fund raising?

    May God rest his soul in perfect peace. I’ll appreciate it if you please let it be. Thanks

    Has that discouraged you from helping out on similar cases?

    My NGO has been fully functional for seven years now and we still help out patients by raising funds the little way we can; we still create awareness, sensitise the general public about kidney diseases and other diseases in the world today. I was recently appointed World kidney cancer day Global Ambassador by the International kidney cancer coalition which is recognised worldwide. I am grateful to be the voice of the voiceless and hopeless suffering from deadly diseases and I’m devoted to creating as much awareness as I can; as our motto remains: “Early detection saves lives”

    As an actor who comes to Nigeria often, do you pay duties for selling your goods here?

    I have registered companies In Nigeria as well as business partners.

    You have formed a very strong alliance with Nigerian actors; do you feel at home when you are here?

    Absolutely! Nigeria is my second home and my colleagues here make me feel like one of their own, no discrimination whatsoever.

    You featured in Tuface’s song, Diaspora Woman. Tell us about the experience?

    It was an awesome experience, Tuface is an artiste I respect so much, so it was a privilege being featured in his video. I also love the song very much.

    Being a singer yourself, how would you describe your success, in term of music?

    If I was singing full time; I believe your question would have been posed differently “how did you become successful overnight?”  I am an entrepreneur; a business woman, an all-round entertainer. I am a jack of all trade.

    You have also managed to keep your figure in shape, even after childbirth. Tell us the secret?

    I take good care of my body. I eat well, exercise often; I try to stay fit by controlling my diet. I don’t take in sugar, I don’t eat late at night, I drink lots of water and I try to get adequate sleep.

    What can you say are the challenges of being a mum?

    There really aren’t any challenges so to say. It’s an interesting experience every woman would be lucky to experience. It has its up and downs but the downs aren’t that significant enough to call them challenges.

    Tell us the challenges of being a producer?

    Funding is the number one challenge especially if you double as the executive producer.

    What is your take on people saying celebrities find it hard to stay in marriage?

    It’s really not about celebrities; the reason why the focus is on celebrities is because they are in the limelight. A lot of regular folks have troubled marriages but people tend not to see that because they aren’t in the open. The question really should be ”why do people find it hard to stay in marriages these days?” But then again; you will never know why a marriage would end until you are put in the persons’ shoes. Till then; people should stop judging celebrities.

    Tell us the brain behind Juliet Ibrahim celebrity football match?

    If you mean the purpose of that initiative, then the ultimate goal is to support charitable beneficiaries as recognised by the Juliet Ibrahim Foundation. All proceeds made from such charity matches goes to the Juliet Ibrahim Foundation.

    Being a physical activity; how were you able to convince others, especially your counterparts in Nigeria?

    I honestly did not have to convince anyone. My Nigerian and Ghanaian counterparts were magnanimous enough to give up their time and put on their boots for a good cause which was to raise funds for critical needs of patients suffering from kidney-related ailments.

    You are often seen in wears that show off your curves. How do you feel when people say you are showing off too much flesh?

    I wear what I feel comfortable wearing, not what people feel comfortable with.

    Aside your lashes presently being promoted, do you have other new projects on board?

    I also have a lipstick line; under the name; Moda Cosmetics West Africa which is also selling in Ghana and Nigeria presently. I am also working on my reality TV show called “The Perfect Assistant “. I directed my first TV series which will be showing on terrestrial TV this year and it’s called “Every Woman Has a Story”. I am dropping a new song called “Keep your head up” featuring Iceberg Slim from Nigeria. And there’s a whole lot more work to be done as I’ll be hosting several big events around the world as well.

    You have featured in both Yoruba and Hausa movie. How was the experience for a Ghanaian?

    Out of the norm and very interesting. I would do it again and again. I can’t wait to act in an Igbo film as well.

    What is happening to your reality TV show the Perfect Assistant?

    It’s going to be out very soon, we are just working on a few modalities here and there.

    Most Ghanaian movies are said to promote porn, what is you take on this?

    Like I said in one interview, those kinds of movies are not movies from well-known producers. They are done by some new and money conscious producers.

    Would you be willing to quit acting for the sake of your marriage?

    I find it extremely selfish for a man to meet a woman in a certain career path and ask her to quit, just to please him.

    A career woman will always stay a career woman. I don’t think you will ask Gabrielle Union this question if you had the opportunity to interview her, would you? Why should an African woman living in Africa stop her career, lose her focus and stop following her dream in entertainment because of marriage and its okay for a westernised woman to continue while married?

    What are the things you want to be remembered for as a public figure?

    Leaving a mark with everything I do for others and will achieve in my career. Just being an inspiration to so many is good enough for me.

  • Rekindling the fire of love in your Marriage! (4)

    Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.

    Dear Reader,

    You are welcome to another exciting time in the presence of the Lord. Love, like I said last week, is the key factor that sustains a Christian marriage. But could it still be, considering the fact that the hot romance in your relationship is fading away, and it’s becoming a concern to you?

    That is why, this week, it is necessary for me to share with you the basic idea that will help you to rekindle that “fire of love” in your marriage. That is what I call Good and Healthy Romance!

    A healthy romance between a husband and wife makes for a healthy marriage relationship. Romance is a great facilitator of a successful marriage. When marriage stops being romantic, it starts to suffer devastation. The moment you stop desiring your spouse, you are already falling apart from each other. At that point, there is the need for a rekindling. Unfortunately, however, this is where many Christians run into problems.

    Paul speaking in the Book of 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 says: Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

    From the above verses of the Bible, “rendering due benevolence” means to give one another the benefit of marriage, which is your body. God placed in man a sexual desire, which should only be satisfied in marriage. That way, the desire will not be destructive.

    But the big question is: why have so many couples denied themselves of this truth? This is where, I believe, some Christians have opened the door to trouble in their marriages.  The man is not available for his wife, so she looks somewhere else. The wife is not available for the man, so he goes somewhere else, because the burning must be satisfied.

    The Bible says you mustn’t allow your abstinence go beyond a time. Nobody fasts for one year.  Even Jesus, the Messiah of the world, only fasted 40 days.  The significance of this is that you are not permitted, under whatever reason, to separate from each other for more than 40 days maximum, lest satan tempts you.

    To tell your wife today, “I am waiting on the Lord”, tomorrow, “I am waiting on the Lord”, next week, “I am waiting on the Lord.” When you finish ‘waiting’, you may not find her there again. That is why most crises in marriages, today, develop out of sexual tension.

    Romance in marriage is one of the areas you must intelligibly manage, because it reinforces the marriage covenant. Take time out with your spouse to go for a dinner date or a picnic in a secluded area away from home. Catch some fun with each other occasionally, like going to the beach or watching programmes of choice alone together. Create time for each other to reminisce happy moments; this will help to spice up a lukewarm marriage.

    Having the fear of God resident will also help you spice up your marriage with good romance, instead of finding satisfaction outside the marriage. You can operate in the fear of God cheaply, if you have accepted Christ as your Lord and personal Saviour. Peradventure you haven’t, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship(John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • “Dissolve by 24 years marriage before my husband kills me”

    A Grade II Customary court in Effurun, Uvwie local government area of Delta State, has ended a 24-year-old marriage, after 42-year-old wife raised the alarm over battering, violent behavior and vitriolic temper of her husband.
    “Please separate us, before he will kill me, and grant me the custody of our three children,” Mrs Ese Akpronor told the court, which was presided over by Chief Umokoro Akpormedaye.
    She told the court that her husband, Mr Obukowho Peter, took pleasure in battering and had stopped caring for the family.
    Ese, who apparently married her estanged husband when she was 18, accused him of “battery, violent behavior, quick provocation and lack of care and attention” for her and her children from the marriage.
    She insisted that she could no longer tolerate the attitude of the husband, who she was married with for 24 years old and blessed with three beautiful children, aged 20, 15, 12 years.
    “My husband is very violent by nature and is fond of beating me. He used to fight me and give me merciless beating of my life. There was a day he beat me to the point of coma and neighbours came to rescue me from his hand.
    “I believe he does not love me anymore, that is the reason he is acting like that.
    The husband (Mr. Obukowho) did not appear, in spite of several summons from the Court.
    The Court President Chief Umokoro Akpormedaye, in his judgment, dissolved the marriage, saying that all attempts at reconciling the couple proved abortive.
    The President referred the plaintiff to the welfare department of the state to decide who the children should live with.
    Umukoro said that the dissolution document would be sent to Mr. Obukowho to let him know the decision of the court.

  • Rekindling the fire of love in your Marriage!(2)

    Dear Reader,

    Welcome to another week with the Holy Spirit. Last week, I began this teaching on how to rekindle the “fire of love” in your marriage. In the course of that teaching, I discussed elaborately on what marriage is all about.

    This week, I’ll be examining a key factor that sustains a Christian marriage Love Responsibility!

    It is not enough to be married, it has to be sustained.  The love responsibility is the master key in sustaining a fulfilled marriage relationship. Love is the instrument a man uses to make his wife a glorious woman, without spot or wrinkle, or any such thing.

    The kind of love that should exist in a Christian marriage should be unconditional. A love that cares when there is no apparent reason to do so. God demonstrated this kind of love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). In the same vein, God commands all husbands to love their wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her (Ephesians 5:25).

    God, through Apostle Paul, issued this commandment to all husbands. It is not an admonition or suggestion, but an instruction that must be obeyed. Your love for each other must be expressed. I read an inscription on a wall some years ago which said, “Love is not love until it is expressed.”  This is true! God gave His love expression; therefore, you must do the same.

    How can love between husband and wife in particular be expressed? This can be done in thoughts, words and actions.  Let’s take it one after the other:

    1. Loving in Thoughts

    When your heart is full of loving thoughts, it readily finds expression in the words you speak. God’s Word says: for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh (Matthew 12:34). If a man, for instance, uses abusive words on his wife, he is speaking out of the abundance of his heart.  Men initiate things, while women respond to them. Therefore, husband, initiate the love relationship between you and your wife, and she will respond to you. No woman hates to be loved. When you love your wife, you easily win her submission.

    Ii. Loving in Words

    Three short words, which some couples neglect are: “I love you.” Yet, by them, men and women come together to establish God’s counsel on the earth. However, these words are forgotten after the euphoria of the wedding ceremony is over. Words are powerful! Therefore, give voice to your feelings; it is not foolishness! The world was made by faith-filled words. Let your “I love you” to your spouse be full of faith. Wife, don’t nag your husband to death by repeatedly pointing out his shortcomings or problems in your home.  Where there’s a need for correction, use the sandwich method compliment, correct and then, compliment again.

    • Compliments:

    Praise your spouse for doing something well or for something you like about him or her. Everyone loves to be praised; everyone loves nice things to be said about them. Men and women who are not complimented do not feel appreciated.  So, when someone outside showers them with the much sought compliment, they are easily taken captive. My husband is never too tired to appreciate and say, “I love you” to me. Each time I hear that from him, I’m excited and on top throughout the day. It works!

    However, you need to understand that until you accept Jesus as your Lord and personal Saviour, you can’t effectively love your spouse as Christ ordained it. You can do this by saying this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship(John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Lawyers decry high rate of divorce

    Some Abuja-based lawyers on Tuesday decried the high rate of divorce, and blamed the development to unpreparedness before going into the holy matrimony.
    The lawyers who spoke in separate interviews with the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN), said many people marry without knowing the `dos and don’ts’ of the marriage institution.
    A record of divorce obtained from an FCT High Court by NAN showed that 24 divorce cases were filed from January to March in that court alone.

    Mr Abdulkarim Shaibu, a lawyer said that a lot of people that go into marriage now do not understand what marriage was all about.

    “What you see at times are marriages arranged by parents for their children, this is mainly among the elite, and they tend to dictate to them how to live their lives.

    “The consequences are what we see playing out now, where couples cannot tolerate one another because there is always a third party in the marriage.’’
    Shaibu said that most couples were not prepared to face the realities, “from the beginning they already made up their minds on something, mainly wealth, and if not there, the marriage will not stand.’’

    He stressed the need for parents to educate their children on the challenges in marriage to enable them take the right decision.

    Another lawyer, Christie Nwaka, said not knowing what one wanted could lead to break down in marriage and finally to divorce.

    “People are always deceived by physical appearances or wealth, and there are usually serious challenges when people who come together because of mundane things are confronted with serious issues.

    “Another serious issue in marriage which people refuse to talk about is sexual intercourse, it can break a marriage when it is not properly addressed and lack of communication between couples too,’’ she said.

    Nwaka urged parents to allow their children to run their homes in their own way and stop interfering in any negative way.

    “Marriage as an institution should be respected, and the only way to do that is to teach and prepare those going into marriage on what marriage is all about and how to make success of it,’’ she said.

  • Rekindling the fire of love in your marriage

    Dear Reader,

    With great joy and happiness, I bring God’s Word your way again this month. By the help of the Holy Spirit, I will be sharing with you on a topic titled: Rekindling the “Fire of Love” in Your Marriage.

    Marriage, like some others think, is not a trap. It was instituted for the good of man. In the beginning, God saw that it is not good for man to be alone; so, He instituted marriage.  I believe God must have said to Himself, “I want it to be good for man; so, I will make a help meet for him.”  I make bold to say that marriage was actually designed to make life great for mankind.

    The subject of marriage actually begins, when two individuals, man and woman, make a decision to marry each other. However, when that marriage is not founded on God, the joy, excitement and satisfaction the couple had at the outset, are short-lived. It soon wears off. It’s like owning a car; with time, new models come out and what was once new begins to age. The car owner now desires to change the once new car for the latest sensation. Why? This is because the old one does not excite him anymore.

    However, when God is at the centre of a marriage, you find that instead of getting tired of loving each other, your excitement and satisfaction increase as the years go by, making the relationship go from good to better, and from better to best!

    According to God’s concept, marriage is good; though this assertion is contrary to man’s claims on the subject.  Therefore, whatever man’s concept you have heard about marriage, put it aside and believe what the Bible says, because that is the only authentic view.

    Buttressing the fact that marriage is good, Paul says: Marriage is honorable in all… (Hebrews 13:4). If marriage is not good, it cannot be honourable at the same time. That is why any experience that is contrary to the Word of God should be thrown away.

    Ever before I got married, I discovered and accepted God’s concept of marriage at the expense of man’s concept. To the glory of God, I am not only enjoying the goodness in marriage, I am also moving towards the perfection of it.

    A woman once came to my husband for counselling. She began by making a sweeping statement that every home has its own peculiar problem. My husband had to cut in to correct her by pointing out that there are exceptions. Having problems in marriage is not the rule. That you are sick, for instance, does not mean that everybody else is sick. God intends that believers’ marriages be a heaven-on-earth experience, where they can enjoy the Kingdom of God and the abundance it has to offer.

    You, also, can enjoy your marriage, because the same God is rich unto all, and He is no respecter of persons!

    To effectively understand and walk in the covenant of marriage, you need to accept Jesus, Who designed the marriage institution, as your Lord and personal Saviour by saying this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”

    If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship(John 14:21).

    Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.

     

    For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).

  • Court grants mother custody of child after dissolution of marriage

    An FCT High Court on Wednesday granted Mrs Enohuomen Unuane, custody of her four-year-old daughter, after her marriage with Dr Stanley Unuane was dissolved.

    The judge, Justice Peter Affen, in his judgment held that the evidence adduced by the petitioner (Enohuomen) proved that the marriage has broken irretrievably.

    “The issues of dissolution of marriage can only be granted only when the petitioner satisfies the provisions of Section 15 (2) (e) of the Matrimonial Causes Act, 2004.

    “ The petitioner adduced enough evidence to show that she and the respondent have lived apart for a period of two years preceding the petition.

    “ This fact was eloquently agreed by the respondent in his response and that shows that the marriage has broken down irretrievably. ’’
    “I cannot but rule that the marriage be dissolved, “ the judge held.

    Affen noted that the marriage was contracted on Dec. 8, 2012 at the marriage registry as well as Mary the Queen Catholic Church, Ekpoma.

    He held that the parties should discharge their parental obligations towards this girl- child, not withstanding that the marriage has broken irretrievably.

    “ This court is duty bound to consider the interest of the child as provided for in both the Matrimonial Causes Act and Child Rights Act, I hereby grant the custody of the child to the mother.

    “Since the child is of tender age and also has been with the mother since she was born, the right of custody should be given to the mother.

    “She should give the respondent the addresses of the house where she lives with the child as agreed and the respondent should make a monthly contribution of N40, 000 towards the education and welfare of the child, “ Affen held

    He said that this amount is subject to review and that the petitioner should not travel with the child outside the country without the knowledge of the respondent.