The Nation Newspaper

Category: Relationships

  • Eight reasons women fall out of love (2)

    1. BOREDOM: “We’ve gotten into the worst rut. We do the same things every weekend. He never has any ideas or takes any initiative to plan anything.” We heard this several times from frustrated ladies who were sensing a complete lack of interest or passion from their mates. To keep a relationship thriving, you’ve got to keep it interesting and put some thought and energy into it. What’s that they say about tending to the garden? Well, it’s true.
    2. Wherefore art thou chemistry?

    Some women get addicted to that initial stage–the warm feeling in the pit of your stomach when you know you are going to see your love. As anyone knows who has been in a relationship long enough, chemistry often fades, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but for some that means it’s time to move on. It may not be the most mature point of view, but it’s a choice women make when the sparks have dwindled.

    Read also: http://staging.thenationonlineng.net/10-signs-to-know-you-and-your-partner-are-a-great-match-2/

    1. Loss of independence

    There is such a thing as “healthy separateness” in a relationship. It’s important that both women and men retain their own friends, own activities and personal interests after they get together. When your partner becomes the end-all-be-all, they also may make you incredibly resentful at what you have given up to be with them. The best couples figure out how to maintain their own identities as individuals as well.

    1. Constant criticism

    It creeps into a relationship, eventually killing any warm and loving feelings a woman might have for her guy. The constant need to nit-pick and criticize every little thing she is doing “wrong” will usually a) knock the wind out of her sails until she feels depleted and then b), she is going to start caring less about putting any effort into the relationship until c) she realizes she must protect herself and self-esteem, and heads for the door. There really is something to be said for, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything.”

  • ‘I think he’s in love with her but wants a child from me’

    “Please I need advice and this is very urgent as it’ll help me because I’m at a point of confusion right now.

    I met a man, he was married with a child but separated now, his wife moved out with their child, he told me while he was separated with his wife a lady came into his life.

    To cut d story short, she moved in with him and they’ve been staying together for two years now but they didn’t get married nor did any introduction of any sort but his family is aware of her, and his family has been putting pressure on him to have kids but she’s unable to conceive as a result of fibroid.

    So he told me d initial plan was for her to move in pending d time she’s able to get her accommodation then she’ll leave but she has refused to leave ever since she moved in neither is she pregnant, fast forward to when we met. We met and he told me everything about him, his ex-wife and the lady months after we’ve met.

    Now I’m so confused, he said he just told his best friend about d lady living with him to seek advice on how he can make her leave.

    According to him, she is not ready to move out cos everyone thought they were already married.

    Read Also: ‘My wife was disvirgined right in my presence’

    This is because they act like they’re married already.

    He hides me from her, doesn’t want her to know he’s dating someone else which is really confusing since he doesn’t want her.

    Now the most confusing thing is I think he’s in love with her but wants a child at all cost and couldn’t get it from her, so he’s trying to have a child with me cos he told me his friends said she’ll only move out if he gets another woman pregnant.

    Please I’m confused I need answers as I’ve already fallen in love with him, he shows so much care and love, he’s been asking to meet my family I’m really confused.”

     

     

    You can also share your story with us @info@thenationonlineng.net

    BOM

  • 10 signs to know you and your partner are a great match (2)

    Continued from last week

    1. You Have Regular Sex. If the honeymoon phase has come and gone and the two of you still maintain a consistently hot-and-heavy romp schedule, you’re on the road to relationship bliss. In fact, a study published in the journal Society for Personality and Social Psychology found that having sex at least once a week brings as much happiness to your relationship as making an extra $50,000. For this study, researchers surveyed more than 30,000 Americans over four decades, and found that having sex just once a week was the frequency most linked to relationship happiness. Surprisingly, couples who had sex more or less frequently were not happier. “Intimacy is just another type of communication, so if that communication falters, so will your sexual connection in response,” says Tessina. That being said, your sexual chemistry is not a race to the sack. “If you’re mutually enjoying more sex, than it will make you both happier, but remember that it comes down to both people wanting to be intimate that often,” says Greer.
    2. You’re Similar

    You know the old saying, “opposites attract”? Well, if you happen to have a lot in common with your partner, it may be a better recipe for attraction. In fact, a brand-new study by researchers from Wellesley College and the University of Kansas found that we’re actually hard-wired to desire “like-minded others.” They were able to reach this conclusion by analyzing pairs or people—from romantic couples to friends and even mere acquaintances—interacting in public. The pairs were asked questions about attitude, values, and prejudice, among other things, and it was found that the longer-term relationship pairs had greater similarities than those who had recently become acquainted. “If you’re more alike in terms of your personalities, you’re sharing similar styles of dealing with a variety of things in life—from interacting with friends to experiencing life changes,” says Greer. “So if you and your partner share similar values and interests, you’ll wind up with more cooperative spirits and having a greater respect for one another.”

    1. Your Spending Habits Differ

    You’re certainly not alone if you find that the majority of the arguments you have as a couple are sparked by personal (or combined) finances. In fact, a Money Magazine poll found that a whopping 70 percent of couples argue about finances the most—more than household chores, togetherness, sex, snoring, and so on. But if the two of you have stark differences in the way in which you prefer to spend—a.k.a. one of you is a spendthrift and the other is a tightwad (yes, that’s an actual term)—you just might be perfect for each other. The proof is in one study by the Universities of Pennsylvania, Michigan and Northwestern. Researchers surveyed over 1,000 married and unmarried couples, and found that most individuals tend to choose their spending opposite when it comes to selecting a lifelong partner. So if that sounds like you and yours, you just may have the perfect yin-and-yang combo to make things work. “Just remember to prioritize the big-spending opportunities like buying a car, house, etc,” reminds Greer.

    1. You Laugh at the Same Jokes

    If you and your sweetie both know how to appreciate a raunchy comedy routine (Eddie Murphy Raw, anyone?), love anything with Will Ferrell, or both equally detest either of those two scenarios, you’re a match made in heaven, says science. A study published in the Western Journal of Communication found that 75 percent of happy couples laugh together at least once a day. Even more interesting, another study reported in the same journal found that 92 percent of married men and women credited humor as a factor that made a significant contribution to their married life. “Laughing at and appreciating the same comedy is the emotional oil to grease the wheels of a relationship to keep it moving forward,” says Greer. “It gives each of you the resilience you need to laugh off the petty and irrelevant things that naturally build up in life and offers more chances to bond intimately on a regular basis.”

    1. You both love to booze it up or not at all

    We’ve all seen it at one point in our lives—the couple scenario where one person is totally sober and the other is a giant, falling-all-over-the-place mess. There’s a good reason why those unmatched levels of drunkenness or sobriety don’t wind up working out in the end. In a study published in the journal of Alcoholism: Clinical & Experimental Research, scientists reviewed data collected from nearly 20,000 married couples, and found that the spouses who consumed relatively the same amount of alcohol were less likely to divorce than pairs where one person drank more heavily or significantly lighter than the other spouse. “I’ve seen many couples split when one of the pair of drinkers got sober,” says Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D., a licensed psychotherapist and author of Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage. “Alcohol alters a heavy drinker’s experiences and perceptions, so couples who drink heavily together naturally have similar ways of living, as do couples who don’t drink much at all.”

    https://www.womenshealthmag.com

     

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  • How to know you are in a toxic relationship

    WE recently surveyed more than 100 experts and discovered that 89 per cent of them felt that half (or more!) of all people are in toxic relationships. So we asked them, “What are the most common, telltale signs of a toxic relationship?” What sort of toxic relationship symptoms should we be on the lookout for?

    Topping their list of responses was “You spend more time fighting than enjoying each other,”

    but that’s not the only sign of a toxic relationship. Here are nine more warning phrases and relationship red flags to watch for.

    1. He seems hostile all the time.

    Is he/she angry a lot of the time? If you feel you’re living with a lot of tension, feeling stressed and not able to express yourself the way you want, your relationship isn’t healthy for you. You want to feel the safety and security to express your authentic self

    1. He puts you down.

    Does your significant other criticize or demean you? Are you on edge most of the time because you feel that you can’t please your partner or do anything right? Does he/she make fun of you or criticize you in public, in front of friends or family? Does he/she act superior towards you or mock you? These are all warning signs of an unhappy, dysfunctional relationship.

    1. He purposely avoids you.

    Does it seem he doesn’t want to be around you? Maybe he/she gives double messages that make you feel confused (e.g. saying, “Of course, I love you” while not behaving in a loving manner). When he doesn’t want to be physically affectionate, you end up feeling rejected. Meanwhile, he complains that you are too needy.

    1. He refuses to change or talk about problems.

    Is your partner open to being influenced by you? Is he/she self-reflective? When you express how you feel and ask for what you want, does he/she listen and make an effort to meet your needs?

    If he/she refuses to acknowledge that your feelings and needs are important, and refuses to go to counselling, you may be stuck in a toxic relationship. Then you need to ask yourself, “What do I need to do for myself to be happy and satisfied with my life?”

    1. He fights dirty.

    Name-calling is a definite sign of toxicity in a relationship. Attempting to hurt someone with words isn’t the way to resolve conflict or communicate hurt feelings. Problems usually escalate quickly when name-calling is present, and it makes it especially difficult to create intimacy and connection in the relationship.

    1. You don’t act like yourself.

    Do you change your likes, dislikes or opinions when you’re with your partner? Feeling like you can’t be yourself and adjusting to please for fear of retaliation can be a sign of a toxic relationship. It’s important to be able to express yourself honestly in your relationship for authentic love to grow. —Keri Nola.

    1. He acts like an over-involved parent.

    I’m not talking about the kind who drives you to your violin recital; I’m talking about the kind who decides your career, what school you go to and who you hang out with.

    When your guy acts like an over-involved parent, he chooses which friends stay, which ones go and what kind of clothes you should wear. You’ve learned from past experiences that your thoughts and opinions don’t matter to him, and if you express them you will regret it later on

    1. He’s the king of guilt trips.

    He has a certain knack for making you feel guilty and indebted to him. You feel obligated to give in to whatever he wants, especially when he reminds you of that thoughtful gesture he’s done for you lately. When every gesture comes with strings attached, it might be time to cut the cord.

     

    1. You hide your relationship from friends and family.

    Your family and friends don’t like the way he treats you. Since they are more likely to give unsolicited relationship advice, you’re afraid that what they have to say may be the truth. So you tend to avoid talking about him, bringing him around, or involving him in any way with your friends and family.

     

    Source: www.yourtango.com

  • Seven things guys do when they still love their exes

    Seven things guys do when they still love their exes. If you’re inclined to think your boyfriend might not be completely over with his ex-girlfriend, there are probably several reasons for your suspicion.

    Maybe you’ve found him weeping while looking at his phone, mumbling, “I wish I knew how to quit you.” Maybe he’s calling out her name in the middle of the night, or, even worse, has mistakenly called you her name. Maybe he still has one of the shirts she left at his place and you’ve caught him sniffing it.

    More likely though, it isn’t a completely egregious and blatant relationship violation, but something subtler that indicates he’s not quite emotionally ready to be dating at the moment.

    “If your new boyfriend is constantly talking about his ex, spending time on the phone with her, meeting up with her (without including you), comparing you in a way that makes you feel less than her, these all point to the possibility of him still being connected to her in some way,” says Jane Greer, PhD, sex therapist and author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness From Ruining Your Relationship.

    In other words, if your boyfriend is doing any (or all) of the below, there’s a chance he might still be holding a candle for his ex-flame.

    It’s not exactly fair to expect him to completely shut his ex out of his life—unless she’s very clearly still warm for his form—because that’s not cool. But if they’re talking all the time it’s not out of the realm of possibility that he still has feelings for her. “Either he feels guilty that he left her, or he isn’t over her,” says Greer. “He’s still remaining overly involved. If this is the case, talk to him about whether he’s really ready to be in a new relationship with you.”

    Sure, maybe they salvaged a platonic relationship—or maybe he’s keeping in touch in case things don’t work out with you. Dudes occasionally view exes as safety nets.

    We’d probably all be better off not following our exes on the Facebook, the Instagram, and the Twitter—especially when they post hot selfies that we still drool over. But a complete digital freeze-out isn’t always something a guy wants to do. You see, a block or unfollow can create post-relationship drama, and it can also make things even weirder when you have mutual friends.  However, it’s still a red flag.

    It’s completely understandable if he’s a little bitter, but if he’s saltier than #SaltBae and going out of his way to talk about how much she sucked, sound the alarm. He might be trying to remind himself why he’s not with her in an attempt to convince himself he’s better off.

    He’s going ham on this relationship constantly hates on her

    There’s this thing some dudes do when they want to get back at their ex. They go into competitive mode by unofficially racing with their ex to see who can get to #RelationshipGoals status first. This is a match you don’t want to win.

    If he’s constantly saying things like, “My ex never appreciated American sssPickers like you do!” Or “She always texted other people while we’re at dinner.” Head for the hills. It may sound like a compliment, but he’s just comparing you to her. And you should run.

    He keeps that custom T-shirt she made for him

    That inside joke about Taylor Swift was probably hilarious back in 2013, but at this point it’s just awkward for anyone who see’s it. He should have gotten rid of it, given it back to her or, like, lit it on fire. However, Greer says people often keep mementos from past relationships for the memories, so it’s not always a sign he’s not over his ex—but it could be. Have a chat about the reason he feels the need to hold onto these memories, says Greer.

    Generally when you break up with someone, you stop hanging out with his or her family. But if he says he’s still tight with his ex’s parents—despite the fact that he “doesn’t talk to my ex at all.” We’re going to go ahead and get real: There’s probably part of him that hopes this keeps a connection between them. Though it is possible that he’s past his ex and just likes some of her family members, says Greer. Maybe it’s worth discussing as your relationship gets more serious.

     

  • Improve your marriage by learning ways to communicate with your hubby (2)

    1. PLAY the empathy card. Another key to being a good Husband Whisperer, I found, is getting your spouse to empathize with your situation. Better to say, for example, that you can’t relax and spend time with him or the kids until the dinner dishes are washed than, “Why don’t you ever help with the dishes?” Not only do gentler words encourage your husband to see through your bleary eyes, they allow him to come to your rescue—something men take pride in doing for women.

    Michelle Maidenberg, PhD, director of the Westchester Group Works, a group therapy center in White Plains, New York, told me that she plays the empathy card with her own husband—like the time she’d repeatedly asked him to put their kids’ sleds in the garage. Unlike her, he wasn’t at all bothered by sleds scattered on the front lawn like some kind of winter yard sale. A day went by, then two, then a week. “I must have asked him 10 times,” she recalls. Finally he said, angrily, “Why don’t you just put the stupid sleds away?”

    Dr. Maidenberg realized then that her husband didn’t understand why she was asking (OK, nagging) him to do something she could do herself. Then she explained: “It’s difficult for me to lift the sleds and carry them down the stairs,” she told him. The next morning the sleds were gone.

    Buoyed by her success, I let my husband watch while I struggled under the weight of two overstuffed laundry bags. When he didn’t budge, I tried the more direct approach. “Buck,” I said, using his affectionate nickname, “I really don’t think I can lift these bags myself.” Like Dr. Maidenberg’s husband, he gallantly volunteered to help carry the load. And I’m happy to report that he still does.

    1. Reward good behavior—the sexier the better. As a Husband Whisperer, I knew that I needed to employ more positive reinforcement. “Reward your husband for completing a task by doing something you both enjoy, like dinner and a movie,” Dr. Alpert suggested. “Women often find men who are good husbands and fathers sexy, so the hint of an even greater reward in the bedroom will almost guarantee success.”

    OK, but why should my husband get a gold star simply for being a good citizen of the household? I don’t get a pair of diamond earrings every time I clean the hamster cage. Still, it seemed like a mutually beneficial bargaining chip, so I was willing to give it a go.

    I let my husband pick from several chores I wanted to hand over, then I told him about the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow (sex!) that would be waiting for him if he handled that chore for the next few weeks. Intrigued, he chose homework help.

    To my amazement, after dinner that Monday, he didn’t have to be reminded about our deal. “Can we do the homework now?” he asked eagerly. “After iCarly is over,” I said, reminding him of another deal we’d struck with our seven-year-old for one hour of TV chill time. When the two of them finally headed off to hit the books, I luxuriated in an extra hour of me-time. And how did my husband respond later? Let’s just say he enjoyed it so much that he decided to extend our deal!

     

     

  • 10 Tips to de-stress your relationships

    Relationships often face challenges. These challenges can bring about feelings of stress and anxiety that if not properly managed can have serious health risks. Below are 10 tips to help de-stress your relationship:

    1. Commit to striving for a healthy relationship no matter what difficulties may arise. Eliminate the exits and obstacles to healing and intimacy. Quitting is not an option.
    2. Be respectful even when you are not feeling respected. Disrespect does long term harm to any relationship. There is no excuse for bad behavior.
    3. Take care of yourself. You cannot give what you don’t have. Develop a small but powerful support system. Find fun, passion and inspiration in something outside of the strained relationship. Don’t expect one person to be that for you.
    4. Make regular emotional deposits. Validate, encourage, stroke, and appreciate your loved ones at a rate of 5 positives to every negative comment or request.
    5. Connect daily with eye contact, attention, and affection and create special opportunities for deeper connection such game night, laughter, walks, vacations, or spending individual time.
    6. Accept others AS IS and overlook weaknesses. During stressful times relationships may be strained and critical. Shift your focus away from flaws and toward the qualities you like and appreciate. Loving is a choice and it will return whenever you consciously look for the good things in the people you care about.
    7. Maintain healthy boundaries to protect your family and relationships from common invaders such as jobs, too much activity, intrusive family members or friends, telephone, computer, TV etc.
    8. Plan for intimate encounters. Don’t wait for it to just happen. Deepening relationships requires planning and effort. Take responsibility for creating the environment as well as the mental and emotional state that will improve your connection.
    9. Conserve energy. Monitor your energy the way you do money. There is a limited supply and you must decide how to spend it. Without boundaries energy is wasted on less important things and people who are not a priority. If you value your relationships, you must save energy for yourself and your loved ones every day.
    10. Live your truth. Have a mission statement for your life and your family and re-evaluate it yearly. Ask yourselves “Is this the life we want to be living?” If it isn’t, make a plan for gradual change in any area that needs it. Seek help when you feel stuck.

     

  • ‘Is it wrong to date someone who just experienced a heartbreak?’

    “I met this really exceptional lady 18 months ago.

    As at then, her boyfriend just broke up with her. According to her, she gave him her all including her virginity.

    We got along so well, and I assisted her in forgetting him gradually or so I thought.

    We became friends and gradually the bond grew stronger. We told each other anything and did everything together.

    Feelings and emotions came to place and of course, I asked her out.

    We started dating and she constantly reminds me not too love her too much, because she believes that she might hurt me.

    She happens to mean so much to me and I have decided to love her with no condition.

    Although, I am way older than her, she is a very young lady who believes that her dreams are major priority for her.

    She was so scared of commitment but I assured her that I am willing to stay no matter how long it would take.

    We have been fine and relationship has been smooth until recently, she became all aggressive and secretive.

    She avoided receiving calls in my presence and went as far as securing her phones.

    I got so worried and tried all I could to make her talk. I apologized to her in case I had done something I wasn’t conscious of.

    She was still moody, refused to pick my calls and asked me to stay away from her.

    I kept pushing hard, trying every means to reach her until finally she gave me a chance to talk to her.

    She told me that her ex is back and that her love for him is still sincere.

    She said that she already accepted him back and that I should please, forget about her.

    My feelings for her hasn’t changed a bit, before she accepted me, she told me how she had been trying to maintain balance in her previous relationship.

    She complained about how she was the only one showing all the love and care. She said the guy never created time for her and even goes as far as avoiding her calls.

    She told me how non challant the guy could be and how he makes her cry often.

    Read Also: ‘My wife apologises for my mistakes, it irritates me’

    Now, she has decided to go back to that cage. At this point, I am so confused.

    I really don’t know what to do or say. I love her and I don’t want to lose her.

    Was it a mistake to have loved someone who recently had heartbreak?

    Was I wrong to have loved her with all of my heart and mind?

    How do I tell her that the guy is no good for her?

    How do I make her realize that she deserves better? Much more better in fact?

    How do I sleep knowing that she is not happy?

    How do I make myself unlove her?”

     

     

    You can also share your story with us @info@thenationonlineng.net

  • ‘My wife apologises for my mistakes, it irritates me’

    “My wife can beg for the Nigeria. I don’t mean begging I mean apologisng.

    She apologizes even when I am wrong,her sorry is beginning to irritate me .

    I cheated on her with our neighbour’s daughter and she saw all the evidences, even the girls mum came to harass me and my wife kept covering for me.

    After the drama she came to beg me. I was irritated.

    I asked her, why are you apologizing and she said because she loves me, why can’t she wait for me to beg her when I wrong her. Why is she always playing the fool?

    So today, she saw a message on my phone, it was a message I sent to my side chick and she confronted me, I tried to explain to her and she got upset, as I was about leaving the house, she started begging me again.

    Read Also: ‘My wife was disvirgined right in my presence’

    Telling me that she is not angry again.

    I tried to push her away, she held me and I slapped her by mistake. Expecting her to let me go but she held my shirt and kept begging.

    I felt pity for her but at the same time I was irritated. Why is she acting all desperate? I love a woman that can be quite hard, not a foot mat.

    How do I go about this?

    I want her to stop apologizing sheepishly.”

     

     

    BOM

  • 10 signs your relationship isn’t working (3)

    IF she’s exactly what you’re looking for, but you’re still finding faults, you need to consider that maybe you’re being unnecessarily judgmental. Everyone has flaws; Why are you picking hers apart? There are a lot of reasons guys do this, but a lot of times it comes from setting unrealistically high standards for yourself, then projecting them onto other people. That’s a problem only you can fix for yourself.

    1. There’s no long-term potential

    Some girls are fun, but there’s nothing really there. Good times, good sex, good laughs… but nothing more tangible than that. Presumably, if you two are more than “just dating,” you want some kind of long-term potential. If you’re not feeling it, that’s a serious problem.

    Solution: Evaluate why she is not a keeper.

    Why don’t you two have any long-term potential? It could be something as simple as “we’ve never talked about it.” It could be as complicated as she’s Jewish, you’re Catholic and that’s important to both of you.

    Either way, you can’t fix it or even know if you can until you know what it is. It can be difficult to communicate such personal issues, not least of all because you’re afraid of hurting her feelings. Psychologist Marcia Reynolds urges you to avoid spitefulness, examine your motives for speaking up and — of course — to ask her if she’s even interested in your opinion before offering it. Reasons to break up: The difference between where she is and what you want to great.

    In the latter case referenced above, there’s nothing really to do about it. You can hang around until it runs its course, but that’s also preventing you from getting something more meaningful and permanent.

    1. You don’t trust each other

    Trust is a difficult thing. Especially if one of you has done something to violate the other’s trust; But maybe one of you is just not a trusting person or have had experiences in the past that affects your ability to trust. You might even be an untrustworthy person who is projecting how you lie or manipulate onto your partner even if they do not do that. Whatever the issue is, you can’t have a serious relationship without trust. So how do you start building that?

    Solution: Begin building trust in small ways.

    Rather than looking for these grand gestures that build trust, look for small ones.

    Keeping your world on small promises allows you to build trust incrementally. Simply being where you say you’ll be when you say you’ll be there can be an important step.

    Be honest about when you’ve done something wrong and expect the same from her.

    At the same time, be willing to forgive when you are the wronged party.

    Share things about yourself that are personal, or even painful. That kind of vulnerability can help to build trust.

    Have a trusted friend you can check in with. Sometimes all we need is a third party to tell us it’s OK to trust. Reasons to Break Up: One of you just can’t repair the trust.

    At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter who’s the one who can’t trust. A lack of trust in a relationship means that there won’t be a relationship sooner rather than later. All you’re doing by maintaining things is digging yourself in deep into something that is going to have diminishing returns and eventually come to an end.

    1. You never go on dates

    It’s funny. They call it “dating,” but a lot of people who are don’t go on a lot of actual dates. This can lead to boredom. It can also lead to “falling out of love,” which was cited by nearly 40 percent of women as a reason for breaking up. So you need to pay attention to this, even when you’re in a long-term relationship.

    Solution: Pick a day of the week and make that date night.

    While it’s definitely serious, it’s also one of the easiest things to go ahead and fix: Pick a night, make it date night. No cancelling for a night with the guys, a work thing or even the Superbowl. Date night is date night is date night.

    This isn’t speculation: A 2010 survey showed that not only did couples with a date night have better relationships — the couples surveyed even had better sex lives.

    Reasons to break up: Just don’t.

    Seriously, if the only problem you have is not going on dates, there is no way to make this a break-up worthy offense. You need to step up, be a man and start directing the relationship.

    1. You’re wondering about other women

    Maybe you’ve got some chemistry with a woman at work. Maybe it’s the girl who serves you coffee. Maybe you’re just day dreaming a lot about women that you encounter. The point is, you’re wondering about other women. Solution: Realize it’s normal and not necessarily a reason to break up.

    Guess what? You’re never going to stop looking at other women. You’re never going to stop wondering about other women. Not only is it normal, there are ways to appreciate women that don’t involve breaking up or cheating. Maybe you flirt a bit with the girl who makes your

    Latte and that’s all. There’s nothing wrong with it. Just enjoy it for what it is but don’t take it too far and break energetic integrity with your partner.

    Reasons to break up: You’ve cheated or think you’re going to.

    There’s no reason to go there. If you’ve truly assessed the situation and you want someone else, it’s time to put a clean and honorable end to it. There are plenty of ways to break up with someone, but the important thing is that you be honest and make your feelings clear.

     

    Source: theartofcharm.com

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